u/SirenScorp

My T had mentioned not seeing us continuing past X month at the rate we are going and named a month a few months away.

I’m a little sad because even though I don’t have a major pressing issue I’m working through, I like having that hour where the focus is just me with nobody cutting me off while I talk. I know some people don’t need therapy forever but it just makes me a little sad knowing the end is near because it’s something I look forward to twice a month.

Any insight?

My SUV was involved in a low speed front end collision (under 25mph) with a bike. Airbags did not deploy and it was driveable to get home, however, it was running hot when accelerating fast/going uphill.

Insurance deemed it a total loss due to year/mileage. My father in law thinks the engine/transmission is fine and suspects just cosmetic and radiator replacements are necessary. He suggested buying from insurance and fixing (he would fix) then selling. But would anybody/any car company even been interested in that?

Anybody have any input? I’m at a loss of what to do. Generally he’s very good at repairs and making calls but I don’t want to be out $X and stuck with a piece of junk nobody will buy. Looking for advice/thoughts.

The office I’m at is new and only has chairs/pillows. Would it be weird to bring a small blanket in my backpack and bring that out during session?

I may have worded that poorly.

What I’m trying to vent about is how I feel social media has ruined the ability for people to think and act on their own. They take information given from TikTok as truth and never follow up with their own research on the subject. I have heard the same person talk about reels all day long (“Oh, I saw a tiktok on that.” “Oh yea that reminds me of the tiktok where XYZ”. “Have you seen that reel where XYZ its VIRAL”) like that’s the only way they can relate to the world. What happened to having conversations in person about our own experiences?

Another thing that drives me insane is how casually words are used now. Everything is “toxic” if they don’t agree with it, everything is “traumatizing” if it was inconvenient, everyone is “gaslighting” them when they get defensive about acting like a shitty person.

Where are the people to have social media just to connect but aren’t excessively scrolling and posting and arguing and making virtual space/content their entire life? The people who can maturely have a conversation and debate something without getting offended that someone sees something differently and feel “attacked”?

Socials have their perks but I feel too many people are too consumed but they don’t see a problem with it. Is this just the shift in the world and how things are heading or am I surrounding myself with the wrong people? How do I find more like minded people?

Or am I just a grumpy 32 year old?

Edit: typo

The person who always comes in having a bad morning because someone cut them off in traffic, complains about almost every client they have to deal with, their weight, their home life and how they’re the only ones to do anything around the house.

I’ve resorted to just excusing myself from the room when I notice it happening during the day— but when it’s at 6AM right as the day is getting started and we are gathered for our daily meeting to go over clients and sales for the day and they immediately walk in complaining it sets the tone negatively for the day and has me starting my day out feeling very agitated.

I’ve tried combatting it with positivity (“oh that sounds rough, the good news is you have the rest of the day to turn that around!” And “it was a bad 5 minutes but the rest of today can be good!”) but no avail.

Im just starting to put 2+2 together.

Years ago I broke up with a fiance and wasn’t sure how he would react so I did it at a mutual friend’s house (we were outside and the friend was inside) so I would have someone nearby in case my ex got angry or upset. I really had no idea how he was going to react because I was just found out he was using heroin/drugs.
After the breakup my ex would be at my parents house “helping” them with groceries when I got home from college classes (he never did this when we dated). I told him it was not ok to just show up and he cannot do that and that he needed to leave. Another time after that I woke up to flowers left on my car by him.
He would act hot/cold and be friendly some days sending texts to check in on me and then other days he would tell mutual friends crazy things like “I’d like to light her on fire and watch her run In Circles”. Mutual friends who agreed to help me with clinical stuff for school made it very clear to not let him know they were helping me because he would attempt to sabotage them helping by not giving them a ride to the college etc. He also had a friend who took a photo and sent it to him — it was a picture of me at a bar with guy friends and he called me blowing me out of the water over that basically accusing me of sleeping around with all the guys in town and calling me slut etc.

I was really numb at the time and just trying to keep things peaceful but now here I am years later wondering if that Would’ve been considered stalking or harassment or either/neither. Therapy lately has been bringing up old things and I’m going to bring this is next session but it’s not for another week.

Im just starting to put 2+2 together.

Years ago I broke up with a fiance and wasn’t sure how he would react so I did it at a mutual friend’s house (we were outside and the friend was inside) so I would have someone nearby in case my ex got angry or upset. I really had no idea how he was going to react because I was just found out he was using heroin/drugs.
After the breakup my ex would be at my parents house “helping” them with groceries when I got home from college classes (he never did this when we dated). I told him it was not ok to just show up and he cannot do that and that he needed to leave. Another time after that I woke up to flowers left on my car by him.
He would act hot/cold and be friendly some days sending texts to check in on me and then other days he would tell mutual friends crazy things like “I’d like to light her on fire and watch her run In Circles”. Mutual friends who agreed to help me with clinical stuff for school made it very clear to not let him know they were helping me because he would attempt to sabotage them helping by not giving them a ride to the college etc. He also had a friend who took a photo and sent it to him — it was a picture of me at a bar with guy friends and he called me blowing me out of the water over that basically accusing me of sleeping around with all the guys in town and calling me slut etc.

I was really numb at the time and just trying to keep things peaceful but now here I am years later wondering if that Would’ve been considered stalking or harassment or either/neither. Therapy lately has been bringing up old things and I’m going to bring this is next session but it’s not for another week.

Intake can be overwhelming with the rapid fire questions. I don’t think I answered any of them dishonestly, but I almost wish I had asked for clarification on what my T meant with some of the questions because that may have changed my answer.

Would it be odd to ask if there’s any intake questions T wants to re-ask me? How would I bring that up?

I have one spot I have sat for the first 10 sessions. We got deep in our last one and it brought some stuff up and I’ve been curled up on my couch under a blanket everytime I try doing the homework. It’s comforting to sit this way under a blanket but I want to know if it’s weird to change how&where I sit in my next session. And is it weird to ask to take my shoes off and ask for a blanket.

I’m very nervous about this.

When you are thinking back to a personal memory like a proposal or finding out about a death of someone you knew or putting a pet down… do you feel any emotion when you think of that memory? Or do you just know “I was happy” and just physically/emotionally are neutral?

Any comments are welcome. I want to preface with I’m a generally happy/neutral person. I don’t wake up feeling bad. I also don’t want to make this post too long but I’ll respond to your comments with memories and anecdotes.

I started therapy a few weeks ago. I don’t know why I went, but over the last year or so I kept having the thought cross my mind that I should go. I have no pressing issues and no traumatic events that I needed to work through, but the thought kept coming back. So I decided why not? Just go, give it a whirl, maybe I can gain something from it and if anything just make sure I’m not a shitty person.

My therapist and I quickly realized a lot of my answers to questions around feelings is “I don’t know.” Positive emotions I can easily name. I know when I’m happy or surprised. But when we start getting into “how do you feel about….” I have a hard time naming how I feel. It’s like I try to think about it and then I’m thinking so hard my mind just goes blank.

If I’m having a bad couple of days I tend to just blank my mind and my body/mood feels numb (is that an emotion?) and wait for it to blow over or level out and become a happy or neutral day and carry on. I rarely cry, but when I do its when I’m too tired or stressed to hold back tears and then I still fight it and prefer to be alone until it passes. Even with my spouse if I have a bad day I don’t want him seeing me crying because I don’t want to stress him out or have him feel like he’s got a problem to deal with if that makes sense? One time he was upset I was crying and was hurt that i didn’t think I could come to him because he wanted to be there and comfort me.

I came across this sub and I’m wondering if my childhood, which I would describe as fine, wasn’t exactly fine? My parents provided everything I needed physically but when I think back now I’m wondering if there wasn’t a lot of emotional support/encouragement/guidance?

For example, if a computer is loading slow or if it encounters an error this coworker will run to me immediately. My initial response the first few times had been “turn it off and then back on, most times it works after you do that.” And he will turn it off/on and it’ll work.

But then when he encounters another issue (or the same issue … days or weeks later) he will come back to me unsure of what to do. I finally stopped saying “turn it off/on” and started asking “Did you troubleshoot?” Or “What is the first thing I’m going to ask you?”. To which the response is either “No” or “Oh, I haven’t gotten that far.”

Today while logging in he said he got a message saying “Your password was compromised, please change it” or something of the sort. He told me he couldn’t login so after having him restart the computer I see the message and ask if he changed his password. He said “No, it’s been popping up with that message for weeks and still letting me log in.” So I tell him change his password and try logging in and it works. I said clearly frustrated at this point, “Guess it just wanted you to change the password.” And his response was “It’s been letting me log in for weeks while giving that message. It didn’t tell me it was going to give me a deadline of when I needed to change my password.”

I’m at a loss here— what do I do before I lose my mind? I have zero patience left. We aren’t having tech issues every day or even every week but after 3 years of someone unable to take simple steps before coming to me it is very frustrating.

Thank you guys!

What are your tips? I would love to be able to strike up conversation with a stranger, but I never know what to say and I kind of stink at small talk (which I think nobody really enjoys).

I’ve always seen the advice to ask them questions about themselves, but WHAT exactly do I ask that isn’t too deep or sensitive that I can genuinely engage with their answer? If I ask what they do for work and they say “tech” I’m at a loss, for example.

At 32 I decided to try going to a therapist to see if I could get anything out of it. I have my first appointment this upcoming week— what should I expect in the first few sessions?

A little about me— while I don’t have any major traumas and don’t currently have any major issues, I thought I’d give it a whirl and get established with someone for when I do get periods of high stress to be able to more effectively manage that stress and maybe improve on communication— I’m not the best when it comes to talking about my feelings, I tend to bottle things up or ignore them vs try to tell someone why I’m feeling anxious or sad.

I was lead here by the suggestion of a fellow redditor after making a post in another sub asking for advice/insight as a mid-30 year old female who wanted to know if it was normal to be in a happy/healthy marriage but sometimes have the strong urge to sleep with men that are not my husband.

I’m happily married to my husband and we have great sex, however, sometimes I find myself with the random thought/urge to want to have sex with someone other than my husband. It’s never directed at someone in particular (no crushes, no love interest, etc) and I don’t want any kind of emotional attachment or having to text them and maintain a relationship. I want to be clear I would never cheat ony husband— but I’m interested in exploring the world of nonmonogamy because it is foreign to me.

I’m trying to decide if I should bring it up to him or not. We’ve had one night where we were both drinking and being silly and swinging came up, but other than that we haven’t touched on the topic. I’m not sure that he would be open to us being ok with each other occasionally having one night stands or hookups so I’m just looking for some feedback/insight/guidance how to navigate this.

I may get a lot of negative feedback on this but I’m truly trying to understand it .

I’m married and love my husband and we have a great relationship, however, occasionally I find myself fantasizing about sex with other guys. Nobody in particular and it’s not all the time, but the thought occasionally crosses my mind that I would love to have a hot hookup with someone I don’t have to have an emotional attachment to or text/talk to every day.

Im hoping you guys can help me navigate why Im feeling this way or tell me if you have experienced this/what you did about it.

Our sex isn’t boring and my husband is attractive. We are in our lower-mid 30s.

Ask me questions if that helps you to help me!

I know RC has an app that runs on the ships free wifi for you to be able to “text” your group to meet up and share schedules. I’ve never cruised NCL so I’m trying to figure out if there’s a way to stay in touch if I do my own thing for a while