u/kleudorian

I’m very happy in a long-term relationship but I was listening to 1989 TV and these Vault songs just got be thinking back to old situationships and almost relationships that had me thinking about jumping off very tall somethings.

Does that ever happen to you? Like certain songs just send you back to certain times of your life when the heartbreak was still fresh and raw

Curious lang kasi I’ve been trying to be more practical with money lately, especially since ang daming mas important na gastusin. Pero recently may binili ako for myself na hindi ko naman talaga need, and honestly, ang saya ko every time I see/use it 😭

Parang minsan pala may mga bagay na objectively unnecessary pero somehow worth it dahil it makes your day a little better.

Kayo, ano yung recent “di ko naman kailangan pero deserve ko ’to” purchase niyo?

I’m a new mom and I’ve only been breastfeeding for about three months, so I know I’m still pretty early into it. But with World Breastfeeding Week, I’ve been thinking about getting myself a little piece of jewellery to commemorate it.

Before having my baby, I genuinely didn’t realise how much breastfeeding would take out of me, literally and figuratively lol. The cluster feeding, leaking, planning outfits around boob access, wondering if she’s getting enough, being the default food source 24/7... but also those quiet feeds where she’s half asleep in my arms and I realise this is such a short season of our lives.

Three months doesn’t sound like a huge milestone, but now that I’m actually doing it, it kind of feels like one?

Did any of you get yourself something to mark breastfeeding milestones or when you weaned? I’ve seen breastmilk jewellery too, although I’m not sure if that’s what I want yet.

Would love to see what you got, or hear how you celebrated. Or did you just quietly move on once you were done?

I’m a new mom and I’ve only been breastfeeding for about three months, so I know I’m still pretty early into it. But with World Breastfeeding Week, I’ve been thinking about getting myself a little piece of jewellery to commemorate it.

Before having my baby, I genuinely didn’t realise how much breastfeeding would take out of me, literally and figuratively lol. The cluster feeding, leaking, planning outfits around boob access, wondering if she’s getting enough, being the default food source 24/7... but also those quiet feeds where she’s half asleep in my arms and I realise this is such a short season of our lives.

Three months doesn’t sound like a huge milestone, but now that I’m actually doing it, it kind of feels like one?

Did any of you get yourself something to mark breastfeeding milestones or when you weaned? I’ve seen breastmilk jewellery too, although I’m not sure if that’s what I want yet.

Would love to see what you got, or hear how you celebrated. Or did you just quietly move on once you were done?

EDIT: I see a lot of people commenting on my phrasing and I want to clarify that he's asked "Will you marry me" several times. It wasn't just would you but an actual will you marry me. It's just the ring that's missing because he's waiting for the "right time" I guess.

My partner has asked me several times if I would marry him, and I have said yes every time.

I was also there for the initial consultation with the jeweller about my engagement ring. He had it custom-made, and I know he already has it. The only thing that has not happened yet is the formal proposal where he gets down on one knee and puts the ring on my finger.

Would you consider us engaged already because he asked and I said yes, or does it only become official once he gives me the ring? Can I call him my fiancé yet?

Not in a “she needs to get back to work immediately” way, because I genuinely hope she disappears for a while and gets to enjoy being newly married without everyone treating her life like a countdown to the next announcement.

But Taylor also seems like someone whose brain never fully stops creating. Even when she is supposedly taking a break, she is writing, recording, directing or quietly putting the pieces of something together.

It makes me wonder what this particular chapter will inspire. So much of her recent work has been shaped by endings, instability, public scrutiny and the emotional whiplash of the Eras Tour period. Now she is entering what seems to be a much calmer and happier phase of her life.

I know some people assume happiness would make her songwriting less interesting, but I actually think the opposite could be true. Contentment does not mean having nothing to say. Marriage, domesticity, ageing, privacy and learning how to build a shared life could give her completely different material to explore.

At the same time, I could also see her directing her film before releasing another album. After spending years turning her own life into music, maybe the next creative challenge is telling a story that is not explicitly about Taylor Swift.

Basically, I hope she takes a genuine break, but I also feel like the creative juices after this honeymoon are going to be wild. Do you think her next major project will be TS13, the film or something completely unexpected?

As a Livie, I’m honestly so proud of Olivia for continuing to speak up about reproductive rights, especially when she knows people are going to criticize her for it. I really felt it when she said abortion bans are ‘pro-control, not pro-life’ because that is exactly what these laws feel like. Its not just some political debate. It affects real people like I am so proud of Fund 4 Good.

What did you guys think of the interview? I’d love to see her talk about issues like this more often.

My boyfriend is 29M and I’m 27F. We’ve been together a few years and we have a baby together. Things are really bad between us right now and he keeps saying the main issue is that I don’t listen to him. I honestly don’t know anymore if I actually don’t listen or if we just communicate really differently. One example is he asked me how much money he could donate. I said I didn’t think we were in a position to donate anything right now because we have a baby, bills and other things to pay for. In my head that obviously meant zero. He got annoyed because he asked for a number and I didn’t say a number. He said I could have just said zero and explained after. He thinks I answered the question I wanted to answer instead of what he actually asked. But it’s not only that conversation. He says I constantly push my own agenda and make conversations about my point of view. He says being listened to is basically the lowest he can go and that he can deal with everything else but he needs that. Now he doesn’t want to talk anymore and says he wants distance. He also told me I will never get 100% of him again, which I don’t even really know what I’m supposed to do with. I feel like I do listen though. I can repeat what he says and I understand what he means most of the time. I just don’t always agree or answer exactly how he wants. Sometimes I explain why I answered a certain way and he says that’s me being defensive or changing the subject. And yes I do get defensive because after being told again and again that I don’t listen, I start feeling like he thinks I’m stupid or purposely ignoring him. So I explain myself. Then he says the fact that I’m explaining myself proves I’m making it about me again. I’ve asked him many times if we can see a relationship counsellor or even just have some kind of intermediary because I don’t know how we’re supposed to fix this by ourselves. I don’t even necessarily want someone to tell him he’s wrong. I want someone neutral to tell us what is actually happening because I feel like I’m losing perspective.

He doesn’t really trust therapy because he tried it once when he was still with his ex and said it didn’t help. I’ve also told him maybe he should talk to other people because I feel like I cannot be completely imagining that he also contributes to the problem.

But then part of me thinks maybe I am just being defensive and maybe he is right that I don’t listen properly. I don’t know.

I do want to fix the relationship. I don’t want him to feel unheard. But I also feel like if I don’t respond in the exact way he expects then it automatically counts as not listening.

AITA for insisting that I do listen and still asking for counselling when he says he is already done trying to talk to me?

My partner (29M) and I (27F) have been together for a few years, and we sometimes seem to have very different ideas of what it means to answer a question properly.

Recently, he asked me what amount he could donate. I responded by saying that I did not think we were currently in a financial position to donate anything.

In my mind, I had answered the question. I meant that the amount I was comfortable with was zero, but I focused on explaining the reason rather than stating the number directly.

He became frustrated because he had specifically asked me for an amount. He felt that I had ignored the question and replaced it with my opinion about whether he should donate at all. He later explained that even if my answer was zero, he needed me to say “zero” first.

After thinking about it, I can see how saying, “I think the amount should be zero because I do not think we can afford to donate right now,” would have been much clearer.

The part I am struggling with is that disagreements like this sometimes become part of a larger conversation about whether I listen to him. I feel like I am engaging with what he says, but I often respond to the meaning or context of the question instead of giving the exact type of answer he expects. He experiences that as not listening.

I would genuinely like to improve how I communicate without feeling as though every conversation is a test I can pass or fail.

Has anyone dealt with this kind of difference in communication style? Are there practical ways to make sure one person feels directly answered while the other still has room to explain their concerns?

A recruiter from ZMG Ward Howell messaged me on LinkedIn saying their client was looking for someone with experience in one of the roles on my page. They were the one who reached out, so I assumed there was an actual opportunity and an actual call happening. So ako naman, I replied properly, gave my availability, prepared for the interview, and set aside time from my schedule even though I have work and a baby to take care of.

Anyone who has a baby knows na hindi basta-basta yung “available ako at this time.” You plan around feeding, naps, work, chores, and everything else. Hindi siya simpleng open laptop lang and wait. I treated the call seriously because that’s what job seekers are expected to do. We’re expected to be responsive, prepared, polite, flexible, and grateful for every opportunity.

But then the scheduled time came and wala. No call. No reply. I thought okay, baka busy, baka may emergency, so I followed up. They replied hours later and we rescheduled. Then it happened again. And again. And again. Days have passed and the call has now been scheduled around four times. Every time the scheduled time comes, they either don’t reply at all or reply 4 to 5 hours later like nothing happened.

At this point, nakakainis na talaga. Not because I feel entitled to the job. We haven’t even had the interview yet. I’m annoyed because my time was wasted repeatedly. I prepared, adjusted my day, and made sure I would be available. What makes it worse is they found me. I didn’t randomly message them. They reached out, said their client was looking for someone with my experience, asked for my availability, then kept vanishing when the scheduled time came.

Gets ko naman na recruiters are busy, pero candidates have lives too. Some of us are working. Some of us are parents. Some of us are literally arranging our day around a call that the recruiter themselves requested. If the role was paused, filled, or no longer aligned, okay lang. Just say that. I would respect a quick update more than being scheduled and ghosted four times.

Honestly, it feels unprofessional and disrespectful. Is this normal recruiter behaviour now, or did I just get unlucky?