u/tamlovesseals

How am I tired of living only at 18? People say, you have so much to be happy about. Like yeah, I know.. why cant it feel like it? Im so tired. Everyday has me feeling the same. The dread of my head hitting the pillow to wake up to another pointless day.. it consumes me. To feel excited is rare. It takes too much to excite me. Why? Every day I wish I was born into a different body. Jfc, put me through the hell of my childhood again if it means that I can grow up into a normal human being. Why is everything dread? Where is excitement, ambition, will? Endless repetition, endless come and leaving. I love you Radiohead. Lol.

I have OCD and Anxiety so I fall for fear mongering quite easily.**

I(18f) just saw a post about how birth control can destroy your brain and once you get off of it, it can ruin your attraction to your partner. Im terrified. The love I feel for my boyfriend is so beautiful and its like no other. Is it really possible to feel differently after getting off? Before birth control, I really had no control over my hormones. I was constantly anxious, my mood flipped like a light switch, etc.. I am scared to get off because what if that all comes back? It was genuinely so hard to control what I said or did at that time because I always felt angry.. Granted I was going through A LOT at the time so perhaps it was that. But idk. I just want to hear other women's stories.

Im 18f, when I was a freshman in highschool, I was SA'd by my brother. I was sleeping and woke up to his flash on me and looking/feeling under my clothes. I fawned. Completely frozen. When he finally left, which felt like ages, I just laid there. I didnt believe it was real. The next day I went to school. I was a shell. It still hadn't gotten to me. When I walked in, I remember just staring at the lockers in front of me. Before I knew it I was sobbing on the floor in front of everyone. The counselors took me away. I was ashamed. I couldn't tell them. I lied. Said it was a rough morning. I remember the night it happened I had texted my best friend telling her that I needed to talk. We had never really talked serious before. But I had no idea what to do. I saw her in 2nd period, told her, tried to forget about it. For weeks I was silent. I still felt his touch. My mom finally asked me what my problem was. I couldn't say, she asked questions and I nodded my head. She asked if I wanted her to talk to him. I just wanted it to go away so I said no. I tried to talk to my friend group about it. I was really affected and lost. One of them ended up telling me that I need to talk to my mom about this and they cant help me. It hurt, a lot. For so long I slept with something in front of my door. I never slept in the livingroom. I would wake up in the middle of the night. I had awful dreams.

Flash forward to today and its almost like everyone forgot. I dont live with my mom anymore, but sometimes I visit. And sometimes she will have him over too. She tries to pretend it didnt happen. Seeing her laugh with him hurts my stomach. I just wish someone was there for me when it happened. I told my current boyfriend because he was curious if I had any siblings. I guess its not common knowledge what fawning is. He asked why I didnt stop him. Yeah.. they made me feel way worse. So now I just keep it to myself. It really sucks. 4 whole years and I still feel it. I wish it would go away. I wish I did something. I feel like a disgusting person for letting it happen. Almost like it was my fault. Like it wouldnt have happened if I didnt sleep only with shorts and a sports bra on. I just wish I could talk. I even tried talking to a therapist and came home to cps at my door. Even when I stated my current safety. My father was drunk and he opened the door to em. Thats when he started hating my brother even more. Its all my fault. So much of this couldve been avoided.

Im 18f, been on the depo shot for about a year now. I usually get the shot the day my window opens, but since I am on vacation I cannot. It doesnt feel great. My emotions have literally been all over the place. I am getting overly depressed from things that usually wouldnt affect me as bad. Does this happen for everyone? I have been snapping at people, sobbing, and I have been incredibly hungry. Its getting exhausting :/.

I genuinely dont understand where this comes from. I live with my bfs family temporarily, so this feeling occurs a lot. When people look at me it feels like i have ruined their day with being an inconvenience to their sight or thoughts. I dont have thoughts like that, but I suspect maybe that is the hidden insecurity. My bfs dad asked if I wanted food earlier and I said no because I hate when people buy me stuff, but the fact that i was a thought in his brain that he had to cater to made me want to rip my skin apart. I have struggled with self harm since probably 12 years old, so its not a new thing. I have been trying my hardest to break these bad habits so I can enjoy my adult life. (Happy birthday to me 😋😋). But the constant urge is not something I want to just deal with. I am not going to act on it but I just wish I knew how i can get rid of this weird fear. Does anyone else struggle with it?

Google always says "distract yourself". But im literally bored I cant distract myself..

im really depressed right now because ive been dog sitting for about 2 weeks now and the loneliness has really gotten to me. I am so genuinely bored being alone like this. I have no money either to go out.

I even eat really balanced. I always make sure my meals have protein, carbs, and fiber. It doesnt help! I never feel full honestly. Every day has been me fighting with myself to not binge. I have binged 2 days this week. Ughh.. any tips? 😭

I am 17f and Ill admit it, I havent been to the dentist probably since I was 10. For my WHOLE life I have struggled with brushing consistently. Im not going to blame my parents, but they weren't always on top of me to build a routine. I also had severe depression for probably 5 years of my life which caused me to also not grow a habit. Currently I dont really have any bad issues that I know of. Just some pains here and there. I have a cavity but im unsure of the severity. Anyways, is there anything else I can do on top of brushing/flossing/mouthwashing? I care more about the health of them, not the whiteness. So id rather people recommend stuff related to that instead. Thank you ❤️😊

Im not ready for a kid, but my scars are visible and its almost inevitable that my future children will ask about them. Do you guys have any advice/experience with this?

I have always had self image issues. Ever since I was in elementary school. For the last 7 months, I have been in a calorie deficit. Also in those 7 months, I have been living with my boyfriend. I have always thought that men are judging their woman for being "fat" because thats how my dad was when I was growing up. So when I started living with my bf, I noticed myself trying to hide that I eat. On weekends when he was home from work, I would pretend to not be hungry and go hours without eating. Even a whole day once. When he was at work, I wouldn't tell him that I was eating because I was scared that he would judge me. A lot of the time I am hungry. When my bf asks if I am, I usually say I am not. I almost see eating as something evil. Like something I shouldn't do. Something that shouldn't be shown to other people. Ofc I only think this of myself. I would never judge another person. Idk. Its weird. And I dont know if I have a problem or not. But all this bad eating has affected my health. I wont go into depth. People recommend that I raise my calories since I was showing malnourishment symptoms. I have raised them this week, but it has been unbelievably hard. I feel like people think I am giving up or I have lost control, or that I am no longer disciplined. I just need support and validation mostly.. thanks for reading

Hi, I am 17f and I graduated from high-school in 2025. This past year I have been working on myself mentally, preparing myself to hop back into building my future. I feel that I am finally ready to do so. But unfortunately I am stuck. I want to enroll into a local community college, but I have NO idea what I want to do. I was just wondering what people did when they were unsure what career path they wanted to take. Any tips? :)