r/xxfitness

I weight like 100kg (220lbs), am 167cm (5'6) tall, and have been lifting for a little over two years. I had a DEXA scan a year ago and my lean mass was 52kg (116lbs). I'm currently on a GLP-1 and my goal weight is around 75kg (165lbs).

Right now my three rep max for back squat is 75kg (165lbs) and my one rep max for RDL is 100kg (220lbs), for bench press it's 50kg (110lbs), and for overhead press it's 30kg (66lbs). On pure weight alone, I feel like these are all pretty respectable however as a ratio of my body weight, they're low for how long I've been lifting. I've been consistently going to the gym 2x-3x a week and I really do feel like I'm putting in effort and pushing myself when I'm there. Comparison is the thief of joy and everything however I'm starting to get frustrated because apparently these body weight milestones are low hanging fruit and something you should hit within a couple months and obviously this has not happened for me. More to the point, I genuinely think I would hurt myself if I tried to back squat my body weight even though this apparently should be "easy."

Do I actually just need to try harder or am I allowed to take my body weight ratio with a grain of salt because so much of my weight is fat?

Sorry, I would ask in r/pilates but I still can’t post there yet and I didn’t see any past posts talking about it so I hope this is allowed.

For those who have been doing pilates for a while, how long did it take you to do Magician successfully? I’ve been doing pilates (mat, reformer, tower, etc.) consistently since March but the Magician seems like the most impossible thing to me! I’ve watched videos on how to do it but it still evades me. My instructor told me to practice hollow body holds to get better and I am working on adding core to my strength training workouts more regularly. I appreciate any response :)

I'll go first - I had two goals for this year.

Number one was to find some kind of movement that I can do every day to improve general fitness. Tried running in the late winter and spring, was able to find time and motivation to do it 3x/week and liked how I felt, but hated actually doing it. Then some family stuff happened, was unable to run the whole month of May, and didn't get back into it.

However, in August I purchased a membership at a local pool and have been swimming laps 3-5 days every week and loving it! I swam in high school and a little into college which was a long time ago but the muscle memory is still there and the fitness is returning. I feel great, physically and mentally.

Number two was a handstand or headstand, by the end of the year. Yesterday I attempted for the first time in a while and was able to get a stable handstand inside of a doorway. Haven't been able to do that in probably 10 years or more!

What about all of you? Let's celebrate progress together!

Your place to talk about anything fitness shopping and style. Whether you want to ask where to buy the best gym leggings or most supportive sports bra, which shoes or belt to get for your favorite activities, the latest on headsets and sports watches, how many times you should wash your hair when you're working out lots, how to deal with body odor, any skincare questions, or how to stop your makeup running when you sweat through a spin class. This thread can include photos of you in your favorite fitness outfits, or requests to find the perfect app, playlist, or fitness technology so you can kill your workouts.

We also allow sharing promotion codes and sales for fitness-related stuff, keeping in mind that our rules on self-promotion and affiliate links still apply.

I started a fitness journey in earnest in Oct 2025 and was going on average 4-5 days a week. Mostly weights, not too much cardio and started seeing progress physique and strength-wise. I was also pretty strict about diet, close attention to protein intact, didn't deny myself a treat once in awhile (e.g. a pastry once a week or a half pint on a Friday) but I kept to my calories and macros pretty religiously.

Went on holiday for a destination wedding and ended up taking 2 weeks off weight lifting altogether. I had a lovely time and honestly didn't deny myself anything. I was in Europe and I ate pastry everyday and had a glass of wine sometimes two) every night. I also walked more than 20k steps/day easily and went up and down a lot of stairs. My physique didn't change and I was feeling pretty satisfied that I'd gotten away with my 2 weeks without much impact. But when I got back in the gym yesterday, I was shocked. I went down on all my weights, couldn't finish some sets and was so much more easily fatigued than I expected. And the DOMS the next day were BAD. Yesterday was upper body and today was lower - same problem today except that it was even more fatiguing bc it was lower body day.

I was honestly surprised by how much strength I've lost. I've seen multiple threads where people discuss how having a break has benefited their lifts and some of them took longer breaks than I did. It did make me wonder if breaks impact men differently than women, like if we lose strength more quickly. It was more than a bit discouraging to come back to such a difference, and even though I'm determined to keep going, I'm a bit worried about how long it will take me to get it back to my baseline pre-holiday.

hi,

has anybody here successfully changed an older womans mind about dieting and exercise?

My mom is a chronic dieter (shes around 65 kg and eats lo more than 1600 kcal per day, usually less). She feels the need to lose more weight , which i do get since she used to be really tine when she was youger, but since she has been in a huge deficit for so long, her weight is not moving anywhere and then she tends to take more drastic measures like eating 1200 kcal pr less. She exercises, but more in the “throwing around light weights and braking a sweat” way and she isnt lifting heavy.

I have tried to tell her so many times that to actually do a body recomp, she needs to throw heavy things around and she needs to EAT. Like at least 1800-2000 kcal per day. Im honestly just worried about her bones and self image - she is menopausal and i really dont want to find her with a broken hip one day.
She also praises me for being lean (which she used to be when she was youger) and also muscular to a degree, but doesnt like the look of a lot of muscle on a girl (which i, even after 10 years of lifting, havent managed to achieve…)

This also goes for my MIL - tho she has never lifted a weight in er life i think, and with her im even more worried about osteoporosis, since she does no resistance exercising whatsoeve and comes from a generation that largely praised weak, small bodies in women (she nearly fainted when i did a wide pullup infront of her, while FIL couldnt). And she eats very little as well

Any tips are appreciated, i come from a medical background and my biggest worry for them is osteoporosis and general decay.

Edit: theyre bth in their 50s, so their bone density is still probably ok, but i am slightly traumatized by my surgical rotation at school, where 90% of patients were grannies with broken hips. both of their mobility is fine, my mom had a shoulder tendon inflammation so she could really lift her arms for a while, but she is ok now. Hardest thing with my mom is the food part, she hates working out but will make herselfdo it, with my MIL, she just doesnt believe that women can even be athletic without looking like a man.

edit2: mom is about 169 cm tall (so ig 5’7-5’8), and she has a generally activw lifestyle - she walks around a lot, gardens etc plus she exercises around once a week in the gym (she knows her way around the machines, but mostly uses light weight) and she does some of those at home workouts without eights for mobility. So thats where my assumption of 1800 kcal comes from, if she were to lift at least twice per week.
I have been working out for my entire life, ive managed to go from bmi 1 7 to bmi 21 solely with muscle (i gained around 10 kgs over 10 years), i look completely noŕal and even curvy, yet even tho my mum (and my mil) saw this change over the years, both refuse to believe that building muscle doesnt mean immediate she-hulk physique.

When I’m lifting near my maximum, I involuntarily clench my teeth, really hard. It’s started to cause pain in a molar identical to pain I’ve had when I’m clenching a lot because I’m stressed (last time was during the peak of the pandemic).

My dentist has put me in a nightguard in the past and now in Invisalign retainers at night. I asked him about the pain and whether I should be using an athletic mouthguard while lifting. He said it’s a good idea, and that I could try the inexpensive stock ones you buy OTC.

So, for fellow clenchers:

Do you get tooth or jaw pain when you’re lifting heavy?

Have you tried a mouthguard? Does it help?

How do you pick the right OTC mouthguard? Like most things lifting related, they seem to be “one size fits all,” but men’s jaws are typically wider than women’s, so I don’t see how even the ones you “boil and bite” to kind-of-customize could fit some 6’4” 250lb dude and 5’3” 125lb me.

Were you able to make the boil and bite kind work, or did you have to get custom? I’m sure my dentist will do a custom one if I want, but he’s both a very good dentist and is in no hurry to convince me to spend on things I don’t need. The fact that he thinks it’s OK to try an OTC one is making me lean that way.

Any advice appreciated.

This is your place for rants, raves, gym fails, feats of strength, and celebrations of success. Complain about the guy curling dumbbells in the squat rack, or sing praises for your gym bestie. This is also the place to post your PR videos and physique photos.

Lovers of the old WTF Wednesday thread, this thread is for you too! Rant away, but be mindful of the sub's civility rules.

Hello I'm a lurker and I've always wondered about squat shoes. They have a raised heel. Is it to facilitate people who can't do the full deep squat (or the asian squat if you will) or does it help with anything else with regards to a squat?

I'm obviously not talking about powerlifters/olympic lifters, but for an average gym enthusiast who can squat with feet flat on the ground, will squat shoes help?

I started working out two months ago. I have been doing mostly cardio exercises, rowing, Ski erg, and elliptical. I also do a 10 minute core program, and about 15 minutes of hip program on the mat. I have become much stronger in my legs and core thanks to the rowing, and now I want to work my way up to doing squats.

I tried to do regular old bodyweight squats today, and it was soo hard lol. I am 20kg (44lbs?) heavier now than when I used work out regularly 10 years ago, so that adds to the difficulty I guess. I could barely come further than my thighs being parallel with the floor, and I could only feel the agonising burn in my thighs, not my glutes. And I could do no more than like 5 reps with good form. Ugh. I also tried doing the goblet squat with only 10lbs, and that felt gruesome lol

Any suggestions? Just keep on keeping on? Working my baby squats up from five to twelve, and then do two more sets? How can I engage my glutes more?

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I lift two or three times a week and, although my focus is on resistance training, my average heart rate during these workouts is usually in the ball park of 145 and so I feel like I'm also hitting cardio. I have a class pass like type subscription and I want to start doing a class on the weekends to complement my lifting but I'm not sure what I should do.

Pilates: I've done a couple foundational/beginner reformer pilates classes and it feels like a very good rest day activity in the sense that it's not super intense. The only problem is that I have to pay an additional fee on top of my existing subscription and I don't know if it's "worth" it if I only go once a week.

Barre: I thought this was more of a cardio thing but apparently it's primarily a strength training exercise. A bunch of my friends do it and say it's fun but I think it might not be super effective for me because I'm already doing so much strength training.

Spin: My body does not tolerate HIIT and the one time I went to a spin class, I could only follow like half of the instructions and I still felt like I was going to vomit at the end. I don't know if this is a sign I should do no spin or if I should keep going back to spin.

I’ve been really enjoying doing deadlifts at the squat rack using the barbell. I can only do about 10-15 lbs per side though (20-30 lbs extra).

Until I progressively overload to like, 25 lb bumper plates, the plates I use are really small and therefore the bar rests really low to the ground.

This makes for a deadlift where I start basically ass to grass and I’ve been told that’s not the best form/starting position for a deadlift.

I wanted to use those aerobic steps today in the gym (like one on either side), but the room they’re in was occupied for a class.

Just curious what you all think of this? Is this not really a problem? Should I just keep going until I level up? I don’t have pain in my low back, but I don’t want to use bad form for obvious reasons.

I’ve been trying to get romanian deadlifts right for 5 months now and I’m not getting anywhere with them. It’s *so* much to focus on— the hip hinge movement doesn’t come naturally to me, I have to correct my anterior pelvic tilt before hinging, I have weak ankles and abs, and because my torso is so long my arms are either going away from my shins causing me to feel the exercise in my lower back (bad) or I have to use my shoulders a lot to keep the bar close to my body.

It doesn’t seem that there’s any real alternative to the RDL, I’ve watched all the videos etc. and it’s still so unnatural feeling, I’m only feeling it in my hams and glutes half the time, and I can’t go up in reps or weight at all without it all going to shit. I suspect my height / torso proportion is giving me a hard time and I really want to know what made this exercise click for other similarly proportioned people who struggled.

when doing any single leg exercises, i have a tendency to lean over and push my hip outwards, essentially centring my pelvis over the working leg, as opposed to having the hip/knee/foot stacked. i feel like this is an issue with my hip mobility or overall glute engagement. i want to address this before i hurt myself so i am looking for advice or exercise recommendations in order to correct my form.

when i try to force myself to keep my hips square, i just fall inwards, its like i cant balance without sticking my hip out. i dont have particularly wide hips so i feel like this can be corrected. i have a history of patellar dislocations caused by weak glutes and being overweight. i did a lot of physio and lost a lot of weight, and i havent had issues with my knee in years, but i feel like this is related.

if anyone can provide any advice or suggest some exercises that may help w proper stacking of the lower joints that would be greatly appreciated, thank u in advance

I’m just getting back into working out after a long break, and I’m looking for some feedback on the plan I’ve come up with. For a little context, I don’t have much equipment and am not really in a place to buy more yet as I’m between jobs. I currently have dumbbells, a bench, and a yoga mat + blocks. My goals are to have arms like Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2 and more defined glutes. As far as my core, I don’t really care about abs, I just want better balance, posture, and flexibility. I naturally have more of a rectangle body shape, and I want to create the illusions of more of an hourglass.

Background 
I'm 27. I was an active teenager through my mid twenties while I was in the military, but sedentary over the last 2-3 years. I previously used the Nerd Firness Beginner Bodyweight Workout and enjoyed it, but I would like more muscle definition and strength. Recently I’ve been doing more yoga just to ease back into things, but I want to focus on building muscle for function and aesthetics.

Diet and recovery
I’m just getting into counting calories/macros, but I don’t plan to make too many changes other than getting more protein to help build muscle as I’m generally happy with my current weight. I also find I get frustrated when I try to track too closely and am less likely to stick with it.

Program Details
I’ve blended a modified version of Bret Contreras Gorgeous Glutes program with arm and back exercises recommended by Linda Hamilton’s trainer, Anthony Cortés.

Monday
Dumbbell Bench Press - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Inclined Flies - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Lateral Raises - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Front Raises - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Kickbacks - 3 sets of 8-12 reps (each side)
Flutter Kicks - 3 sets of 20 reps
Crunches - 3 sets of 10 reps
Reverse Crunches - 3 sets of 10 reps
Plank - 3 sets of 30 seconds

Tuesday
One Arm Rows - 3 sets of 8-12 reps (each side)
Bent Over Rows - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Standing Curls - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Bodyweight Hip Thrust - 3 sets of 20 reps
Bodyweight Full Squat - 3 sets of 20 reps
Good Mornings - 3 sets of 20 reps
Dumbbell Romanian Deadlift - 3 sets of 10 reps
Twist Hip Lift - 1 sets of 10 reps (each side)
Side Lying Clamshell - 1 set of 30 reps (each side)

Wednesday
Stretching/Yoga

Thursday
Dumbbell Bench Press - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Inclined Flies - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Lateral Raises - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Front Raises - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Kickbacks - 3 sets of 8-12 reps (each side)
Flutter Kicks - 3 sets of 20 reps
Crunches - 3 sets of 10 reps
Reverse Crunches - 3 sets of 10
Plank - 3 sets of 30 second hold

Friday
One Arm Rows - 3 sets of 8-12 reps (each side)
Bent Over Rows - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Standing Curls - 3 sets of 8-12 reps
Bodyweight Single Leg Glute Bridge - 3 sets of 20 reps (each side)
Bodyweight Walking Lunge - 3 sets of 10-20 reps (each side)
Supermans - 3 sets of 20 reps
Dumbbell Glute Bridge - 3 sets of 10 reps
Goblet Full Squat - 3 sets of 10 reps
Side Lying Abduction - 1 set of 30 reps (each side)

Saturday
Stretching/Yoga

Sunday
Stretching/Yoga

I plan to start at a low weight for any dumbbell exercises for the first week or so (~5-10lbs), just to focus on proper form and to gauge my limits, then increase weight as I notice a plateau, or after assessing my progress and strength every 2 weeks. On my final set of each weighted exercise, I plan to go until failure to help gauge if my weight is challenging enough.

If I notice fatigue, or after a check-in with myself after a period of about 4-6 weeks, I plan to deload by reducing my dumbbell weight and reducing the number of reps on bodyweight exercises. If I feel I need to take it easier than that, I will spend a week focusing on yoga/stretching & flexibility to allow for deeper recovery.

Edited to fit template

Your place to talk about anything fitness shopping and style. Whether you want to ask where to buy the best gym leggings or most supportive sports bra, which shoes or belt to get for your favorite activities, the latest on headsets and sports watches, how many times you should wash your hair when you're working out lots, how to deal with body odor, any skincare questions, or how to stop your makeup running when you sweat through a spin class. This thread can include photos of you in your favorite fitness outfits, or requests to find the perfect app, playlist, or fitness technology so you can kill your workouts.

We also allow sharing promotion codes and sales for fitness-related stuff, keeping in mind that our rules on self-promotion and affiliate links still apply.

This is your place for rants, raves, gym fails, feats of strength, and celebrations of success. Complain about the guy curling dumbbells in the squat rack, or sing praises for your gym bestie. This is also the place to post your PR videos and physique photos.

Lovers of the old WTF Wednesday thread, this thread is for you too! Rant away, but be mindful of the sub's civility rules.