u/Adventurous-Sealion

This year me and some colleagues started a small book club where one person chooses a book in a genre or style that's their preference. But is has to be a book you haven't yet read yourself. I like several genres, but fantasy has always been my favourite. It's my turn now and I've discovered Charles De Lint's books online, so of course I've ordered some. I feel like his books will turn out to be exactly what I love, so I want to choose one of his for the book club.

I've ordered the next books: The onion girl, Dreams underfoot, Memory and dreams, Yarrow, Greenmantle and The little country.

I was thinking of the members in the book club that aren't that much into fantasty (but they're open to it! Our whole deal is that we make each other read books outside of our usual picks), but want to pick one that has the biggest chance to be liked by most. So my question is, to the avid Charles De Lint readers: which one of these books should I pick according to you? And why?

Thanks in advance!

This year me and some colleagues started a small book club where one person chooses a book in a genre or style that's their preference. But is has to be a book you haven't yet read yourself. I like several genres, but fantasy has always been my favourite. It's my turn now and I've discovered Charles De Lint's books online, so of course I've ordered some. I feel like his books will turn out to be exactly what I love, so I want to choose one of his for the book club.

I've ordered the next books: The onion girl, Dreams underfoot, Memory and dreams, Yarrow, Greenmantle and The little country.

I was thinking of the members in the book club that aren't that much into fantasty (but they're open to it! Our whole deal is that we make each other read books outside of our usual picks), but want to pick one that has the biggest chance to be liked by most. So my question is, to the avid Charles De Lint readers: which one of these books should I pick according to you? And why?

Thanks in advance!

This year me and some colleagues started a small book club where one person chooses a book in a genre or style that's their preference. But is has to be a book you haven't yet read yourself. I like several genres, but fantasy has always been my favourite. It's my turn now and I've discovered Charles De Lint's books online, so of course I've ordered some. I feel like his books will turn out to be exactly what I love, so I want to choose one of his for the book club.

I've ordered the next books: The onion girl, Dreams underfoot, Memory and dreams, Yarrow, Greenmantle and The little country.

I was thinking of the members in the book club that aren't that much into fantasty (but they're open to it! Our whole deal is that we make each other read books outside of our usual picks), but want to pick one that has the biggest chance to be liked by most. So my question is, to the avid Charles De Lint readers: which one of these books should I pick according to you? And why?

Thanks in advance!

I’ve started with 25 mg four days ago and after several hours my neck starts hurting. The pain goes away about two hours before I need to take the next one. But I cannot put my chin on my chest for the first time now and I’m scared. Is this normal? I read about how it could trigger aseptic meningitis. I have no other side effects though. No nausea, no fever, no rash.

This is going to be kinda long, I’m sorry.

For context: I’m 31F, mom of one, co-parenting. Good relationship with current partner.

So I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar type 2 and idk if it’s right or not. I’ve also been diagnosed with inattentive ADHD when I was 28. When I read about it online, I feel like it could also be cyclothymia. I find it hard to notice the differences between the two and to be sure which one I experience, even after reading several pages about it.

My psychiatrist is pretty sure it’s bipolar 2, even though I mostly feel depressed/lethargic, low in energy. I never have days/weeks where I feel constantly energetic. That only happens in spans of a few hours. I can also hyperfocus on something and do intensive research on that topic, making me sleep less than I should. The hyperfocus stays for several days or weeks until I feel my interest leaving and there’s nothing I can do to stay interested in it. But idk even then I can feel tired and disinterested in general life. Even hobbies are hard to do. I’d rather sleep than do most things. I’m glad it hasn’t been so bad that it affects my child, I’ll force myself to play with her, give her attention and do fun stuff even when I don’t feel like it inside. I’ll just crash afterwards and need a lot of sleep. It’s also all very dependant on the weather and the seasons. Summer/sunshine/warmth = happy me (but briefly), fall/winter/clouds/cold = lethargic me.

I think my problem is that I also have major imposter syndrome. It affects everything: I feel like I actually never deserved my degree, that I fake being good at my job, that all art I ever made is actually awful, that my (mental) problems aren’t as bad as I led people on to believe, because other patients have it so much worse. I still function, I mask it all very well, I like to believe I’m a good mom and take good care of my child, I do my work just well enough. When I had a major depression two years ago, it all began with me thinking I’m a narcissist, that I try to make people feel bad for me when I share how I feel, that everyone will see the real me one day and decide I suck and then leave me. It was horrible. I often feel like that, but during that time it was a constant thought that I could no longer fight against. I feel like I don’t even deserve being diagnosed with ADHD and bipolarity: It’s not as bad as with others. Maybe I’m exaggerating. Maybe I wanna be special/different. Maybe it’s an excuse for me just being lazy and boring. Those are the thoughts that are in my head right now (as usual).

At the moment I feel like I just want to disappear or the world as it is to stop existing. I never felt s**cidal, but I’ve felt for a long time ’I don’t want to keep living like this. I want to be a different person.‘ I once read that social media post that goes around of this person admitting they dreamt of getting hospitalized after crashing down in the streets and everyone being very concerned for them and then the doctor discovered they lack ’THE vitamin’ and people are like ‘how did they persevere all this time without THE vitamin?’ and then they take it and they are better forever. That’s how I’ve always felt. Sometimes I wish I was even worse, that it would be so bad I couldn’t mask anymore and that I’m hospitalised and with help everything changes and I’m never like this ever again. But I’ll never stop masking, for the sake of my child. She needs me to be there for her. To be stable and strong and safe.

I’ve started taking Lamotrigine yesterday, I hope it’ll help with the low moods.

If you have some advice or encouraging words or if you want to share your experience, it would be very helpful and I’d be very thankful <3

For context: I’m 31F, mom of one, co-parenting. Good relationship with current partner.

So I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar type 2 and idk if it’s right or not. I’ve also been diagnosed with inattentive ADHD when I was 28.
My psychiatrist is pretty sure it’s bipolar 2, even though I mostly feel depressed/lethargic, low in energy. I never have days/weeks where I feel constantly energetic. That only happens in spans of a few hours. I’ll hyperfocus on something and do intensive research on that topic, making me sleep less than I should. The hyperfocus stays for several weeks until I feel my interest leaving and there’s nothing I can do to stay interested in it. But idk even then I can feel tired and desinterested in general life. Even hobbies are hard to do. I’d rather sleep than do most things. I’m glad it hasn’t been so bad that it affects my child, I’ll force myself to play with her, give her attention and do fun stuff even when I don’t feel like it inside. I’ll just crash afterwards and need a lot of sleep. It’s also all very dependant on the weather and the seasons. Summer/sunshine/warmth = happy me, fall/winter/clouds/cold = lethargic me. Most of the time I feel lethargic.

I think my problem is that I also have major imposter syndrome. It affects everything: I feel like I actually never deserved my degree, that I fake being good at my job, that all art I ever made is actually awful, that my (mental) problems aren’t as bad as I led people on to believe, because other patients have it so much worse. I still function, I mask it all very well, I like to believe I’m a good mom and take good care of my child, I do my work just well enough. When I had a major depression two years ago, it all began with me thinking I’m a narcissist, that I try to make people feel bad for me when I share how I feel, that everyone will see the real me one day and decide I suck and then leave me. It was horrible. I often feel like that, but during that time it was a constant thought that I could no longer fight against. I feel like I don’t even deserve being diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar 2: It’s not as bad as with others. Maybe I’m exaggerating. Maybe I wanna be special/different. Maybe it’s an excuse for me just being lazy and boring. Those are the thoughts that are in my head right now (as usual).

At the moment I feel like I just want to disappear or the world as it is to stop existing. Like it would burst open to reveal a heavenly garden where I and the people I love could live with no jobs, no money that’s needed, amazing weather, only fun stuff to do, no internal sadness or constant fatigue. I never felt s**cidal, but I’ve felt for a long time ’I don’t want to keep living like this. I want to be a different person.‘ I once read that social media post that goes around of this person admitting they dreamt of getting hospitalized after crashing down in the streets and everyone being very concerned for them and then the doctor discovered they lack ’THE vitamin’ and people are like ‘how did they persevere all this time without THE vitamin?’ and then they take it and they are better forever. That’s how I’ve always felt. Sometimes I wish I was even worse, that it would be so bad I couldn’t mask anymore and that I’m hospitalised and with help everything changes and I’m never like this ever again. But I’ll never stop masking. I’ll never stop trying, for the sake of my child. She needs me to be there for her. To be stable and strong and safe.

For context: I’m 31F, mom of one, co-parenting. Good relationship with current partner.

So I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar type 2 and idk if it’s right or not. I’ve also been diagnosed with inattentive ADHD when I was 28. I took some meds after that (first Elvanse and later Medikinet for those wondering) but they left me feeling so bad in the evenings and sleepless at nights that I stopped those. I didn’t really like how I felt using those either. Nauseous and/or restless.
My psychiatrist is pretty sure it’s bipolar 2, even though I mostly feel depressed/lethargic, low in energy. I never have days/weeks where I feel constantly energetic. That only happens in spans of a few hours. I’ll hyperfocus on something and do intensive research on that topic, making me sleep less than I should. The hyperfocus stays for several weeks until I feel my interest leaving and there’s nothing I can do to stay interested in it. But idk even then I can feel tired and desinterested in general life. Even hobbies are hard to do. I’d rather sleep than do most things. I’m glad it hasn’t been so bad that it affects my child, I’ll force myself to play with her, give her attention and do fun stuff even when I don’t feel like it inside. I’ll just crash afterwards and need a lot of sleep. It’s also all very dependant on the weather and the seasons. Summer/sunshine/warmth = happy me, fall/winter/clouds/cold = lethargic me. Most of the time I feel lethargic. Add to all of this that I feel even worse the week before and during my period. Only during the few days of ovulation I can feel kinda fine.

But anyway, after some convo’s with my psychiatrist he decided what it is and prescribed Lambipol (lamotrigine). I’ve taken Mirtazapine, Escitalopram and Wellbutrin before. The first two made things worse. The last was okay-ish, I could get out of bed more easily, but it gave me an epileptic episode so I had to stop.

I think my problem is that I also have major imposter syndrome. It affects everything: I feel like I actually never deserved my degree, that I fake being good at my job, that all art I ever made is actually awful, that my (mental) problems aren’t as bad as I led people on to believe, because other patients have it so much worse. I still function, I mask it all very well, I like to believe I’m a good mom and take good care of my child, I do my work just well enough. When I had a major depression two years ago, it all began with me thinking I’m a narcissist, that I try to make people feel bad for me when I share how I feel, that everyone will see the real me one day and decide I suck and then leave me. It was horrible. I often feel like that, but during that time it was a constant thought that I could no longer fight against. I feel like I don’t even deserve being diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar 2: It’s not as bad as with others. Maybe I’m exaggerating. Maybe I wanna be special/different. Maybe it’s an excuse for me just being lazy and boring. Those are the thoughts that are in my head right now (as usual).

I’m not sure what I’m hoping for with this post. I felt the need to share my experience. I’m also extra sad today and I don’t know why. I just started with Lambipol today, but I’m not sure if it will even help given all the other stuff I’ve tried before that didn’t help. I’m eating healthy, walking a lot… Been doing that for two months now. That should help but I don’t feel much better though. I’m stressed.

I guess advice is welcome. At the moment I feel like I just want to disappear or the world as it is to stop existing. Like it would burst open to reveal a secret heavenly garden or so where I and the people I love could live with no jobs, no money that’s needed, amazing weather, only fun stuff to do, no internal sadness or constant fatigue. I’ve never felt s**cidal, but I’ve felt for a long time ’I don’t want to keep living like this. I want to be a different person.‘ I once read that social media post that goes around of this person admitting they dreamt of getting hospitalized after crashing down in the streets and everyone being very concerned for them and then the doctor discovered they lack ’THE vitamin’ and people are like ‘how did they persevere all this time without THE vitamin?’ and then they take it and they are better forever. That’s how I’ve always felt. Sometimes I wish I was even worse, that it would be so bad I couldn’t mask anymore and that I’m hospitalised for some time and with help everything changes and I’m never like this ever again. But I’ll never stop masking. I’ll never stop trying, for the sake of my child. She needs me to be there for her. To be stable and strong and safe.

I (31F) have been losing a bit of weight since the start of June. I lost 11 lbs since then. I did it by eating 1400-1600 calories a day and walking almost daily. My average daily steps are 7500. There were three days where I ate 1900 calories but that was planned (when we ordered food). I wanted to get 10k steps daily, but a sore knee prevented me from walking long distances for three weeks. I have insoles now to help with that and I’m back to walking 10k since last week.

Since two days (today is the third) I’ve been sleeping excessively and still feeling tired and low in energy. Yesterday was the first day I overate and had about 2300 calories in total. The hunger is so much worse than before and hard to ignore. Is it maybe time to maintain for while to get some energy back? My bmi is currently 21,9 and my goal is to get to bmi 20 and see how that feels (as in: if that‘s too hard to maintain I can always go back up to bmi 21-21,5.) I still manage to get my daily steps because by the evening I find some energy and go for a one hour walk.

I‘ve been having neck pain and I’m pretty sure it’s caused by my pillow(s). I have two, but only use one at once. One is way too thick and the other too fluffy. I’ve been looking at pillows that are designed to support the neck, but I don’t know how to know which ones are real good quality and if these are even worth buying. I don’t want to have to buy several to finally find a good one as my budget is tight. Anyone have any recommendations or maybe alternatives?

Idk if this is the right place for it, but I need to vent about my mother and this seemed like a safe space to go and let it out.

First I want to say this is like a minor issue I’m a bit frustrated about, I know there are worse things, but I wanted to type it out and see what others say about this.

Some context: I (31F) have one child with my ex (40M) that we co-parent 50/50. we have a good understanding with each other and both our partners do too. I can safely say thay I’m proud of how the four of us co-parent and create a good childhood for my child.

At this moment my kid is on a holiday with her dad and plusmom. We have a chat group to send each other photos and videos of our kid or make arrangements. My ex is also in contact with my mom through messenger because she also likes updates of my kid when she’s there. She’s a very involved grandmother.

This sounds perfect. On the outside. Truth is that my mom is extremely controlling. She and I don’t have the greatest relationship. I’m the oldest daughter. Yay. Everything I do she sees as competition or just plain wrong and constantly tries to demotivate me for things I do and wants me to live my life like she would. She doesn’t respect my privacy (She comes by unannounced and looks into my mailbox and would even read my mail without my knowledge, things like that). It’s better since I’m with my current partner (31M) though, she feels he doesn’t fall for her lies and attempts to make me look bad. Like, he told me that when we visit my parents, everytime I leave the room, she’ll say something negative about me to him, in a verrryyy subtle way. That’s weird, right? I knew she’d do that though. She gets off on making me look bad to the people I love. She gossips about me to our whole family. But it’s always wrapped in ‘concerns’ or ‘caring’.

She’s also done several attempts to drive a wedge between me and my kid’s dad. The weird thing is that she liked him a LOT when we were together and did that anyway. Not that she wanted us to split up, but for some reason she wanted him to help her make me be ‘normal’ I guess. Which worked because he fell for her manipulations (after we split up she did hurt him emotionally several times though when she didn’t get her way so now he kinda realises slightly more how she really is). But yeah, she’s still trying to do that and I don’t know why. I mean, she cares for my kid so wouldn’t she want us all to stay on good terms with each other?

I’m frustrated at the moment because she just sent me a message: ‘I got a photo of [my kid’s name] today. Did you get a photo?’ and while this seems innocent, it isn’t. No, I didn’t get a photo. I videocalled with my kid yesterday while she was showing the pool and the house and talking about her holiday to us. I’m sure I’ll get a photo in the next few days. What she wanted me to know was: ‘I got a photo before you’ and I thought she wanted to flex about it but my partner then commented that maybe she wanted to drive a wedge between me and them, since she tries that with himself all the time too.

And I got so mad. She sent the photo too and I racted with giving it a heart emoji, ignoring the stupid question because it leads to nothing. She then sent: ‘so did you get photos?’ And I haven’t opened the message yet because I don’t want to be pulled into this imaginated competition of hers. In the past I would have probably gotten mad at my ex for not sending me a photo, now I know that’s what she wants because then she could act like the mediater, while she’s the one who started the conflict in the first place. Idk what I can answer to truly block her attempts though.

Lots of word vomit, I’m sorry. I don’t even have the mental energy to write a TL/DR I’m sorry.

Ik huur nu bijna drie jaar een appartement en heb een discussie met het immokantoor.

De intredende plaatsbeschrijving is doorgegaan zonder mijn aanwezigheid als huurder, omdat men mij niet had uitgenodigd of mij op de een of andere manier liet weten wanneer dit doorging.
Enkel de makelaar en de verhuurder waren erbij.

Toen ik hier bijna twee jaar woonde, kreeg ik een mail van het immokantoor met de vraag de plaatsbeschrijving digitaal te ondertekenen en te betalen. Ik weigerde, want mijns inziens is deze niet wettig. Nu, een jaar later, krijg ik weer mails van het immokantoor om mij daarvoor onder druk te zetten. De makelaar beweert dat dit steeds samen gebeurt met de sleuteloverdracht en ik dus wel aanwezig was. Ik kan echter bewijzen dat ik op de dag en het uur van de plaatsbeschrijving aan het werk was en niet aanwezig had kunnen zijn. De sleuteloverdracht gebeurde ook op een ander moment. Hij dreigde ook verdere stappen te ondernemen als ik niet wou tekenen en betalen.

Ben ik in mijn recht als ik weiger? Ik heb bewijs dat ik aan het werk was op het moment dat dit doorging. Is dat voldoende?

Het is niet zo dat ik geen kosten zou willen betalen aan de verhuurder bij schade dat door mijn gezin werd aangericht in het appartement. Eens wij hier weggaan, zullen we uiteraard wel zorgen dat alles piekfijn in orde is. Het gaat er mij om dat het immokantoor verkeerd heeft gehandeld.

So I’ve used the samsung galaxy fit 3 for a while but recently bought the Siltcon vitea activity tracker. I wanted to compare their step trackers, so I wore both of them at the same arm for two days in a row. Yesterday there was a difference of about 1500 steps and today there’s a difference of about 2400 steps. The samsung always shows more steps than the siltcon. Idk which one is more accurate? I tried walking and counting my steps myself and then watching what both watches did, but sometimes the siltcon didn’t count the steps and sometimes it counted more than the samsung.

Does anyone know these two brands and knows which one is the most accurate one? Or knows better ways to test the accuracy? I know step trackers worn around the wrist are never 100% accurate, but these differences are a bit too big and that’s both on days I didn’t even get to 10k steps.

This is a question for the fellow women on here. I’m always tired in the days right before and during my periods. I’m bloated and crave sugar. Mine are painful too the first two days, but walking helps with distracting me from it. Having my period usually turns me into a sleepy, overearing couch potato.

I’ve started my weight loss journey 3 weeks ago, my period is about to start any time now. I’m already feeling a bit more low on energy.

What do you do on those days? How do you get yourself to work out, to eat healthy, but not overdo it? Or do you rest until your period is over?

As the title says. I see it all over pinterest as a weight loss drink. It’s not very tasteful imo, but maybe with some added fruits, mint… maybe that’ll taste alright.

But I’m wondering if anyone has tried this for a while, does it really help in your opinion?

As the title says. I see it all over pinterest as a weight loss drink. It’s not very tasteful imo, but maybe with some added fruits, mint… maybe that’ll taste alright.

But I’m wondering if anyone has tried this for a while, does it really help in your opinion?

I love water and most days it’s the only drink I get. I drink 1 liter t 1,5 liter a day I think. But often just the 1 liter. I want to drink 2 liters a day as it’s recommended, but I have a small bladder apparantly so that makes me go to the restroom about every hour or so. I also try to drink as much as I can in the morning and at lunch, so that I can drink less after 4 pm, otherwise I have to get up about 3 times at night. I do have headaches often (not daily, but let’s say weekly) and find my skin rather dry.

Tea is even worse. I love tea, but that makes me have to go almost non stop. I‘ve tried training my bladder by keeping it in and also do kegel excercises, but I notice no difference.

So this is me asking if anybody knows what to do since I’m out of ideas.

It probably took a while until I realised, but I see many sellers use AI generated photos of worn clothes. Then they put real photos of the items with it, but not worn. In the AI photos the clothes all fit perfectly of course. I mean, that’s false advertising isn’t it? But I’m sure Vinted won’t do anything if you report them…