u/Living-Atmosphere690

Just a simple question to keep me busy and to maybe find more foods that I could eat when my stomach is very upset lol.

What's something that you know you can always rely on when it get too much and your body just can't handle anything other than this? :)

This honestly as always annoyed me pretty much. People telling me they understand what I feel, they get me. Or even comparing being a Therian to being Trans.

Don't get me wrong, as someone who's also gender-fluid, I know that being trans is not easy at all. But it's literally not the same as identifying as one or multiple animals that you literally cannot transition into. It's just frustrating, because I don't have anything to actually fix my body to my Theriotypes.

And what bother me even more is when I talk about my Theriotypes and how much I love them and people act like they get it to my level. Like no, you like that animal a lot, yes. But I'm LITERALLY that animal.

It makes me sound really possessive and even toxic over my Theriotypes, but I'm not reacting like that on purpose really, I'm just so exhausted with non Alterhumans trying to tell me that they get it. Because you genuinely cannot get it unless you've lived it.

And I really wish being a Therian would be as easy as being trans, I really do. But it's so much harder. Especially as someone who gotta deal with both. I feel like no matter what, I'll never ever be satisfied with my identity, my appearance, the people surrounding me or the way I act. Because it never actually match like I need it to.

(EDIT: Just wanted to add since it came off wrong to a lot of people and I get why, by saying that being trans is easier I was mainly refering to dealing with the dysphoria and euphoria part of it! Being trans in its whole is way more dangerous than just being a Therian, and while posting this I didn't really think through that it could come off as me downplaying trans people. Sorry for any confusion!)

Hello! So I am Aroace, not really familiar with all the terms and stuffs around the a-spec community, and I was wondering if anyone experienced this/knew what it was called?

I get things that ressemble the basic crush that anyone could get, but it's not exactly the same. It's more like, I don't feel romantic or sexual attraction toward them, but I feel a deep need to make the person feel loved and appreciated, to make them know that I value them as more than just friends, but not exactly like romantic either.

I want to make them happy and to see them react to my attention, and I don't feel attracted to them but I still get extremely joyous when I see that I make them happy, I'm not sure if it as a name?

I've been thinking about this today, and Idk if I'm the only one but... Did some of y'all thought you were just the avoidant attached kind of person in the past, before realizing you genuinely just don't feel it or is that just a me thing?

Like I was always thinking it was normal, in a way, and that I just didn't really liked to get too close and vulnerable and stuffs... When actually it's just that I didn't had any actual feelings for the people I dated.

I am currently 17 and an half, and well aware that slowly the need for a job and to start my independent life will come... But it's such an hard and sensitive subject to me.

Everytime my mother ask me what I want to do later or if I have paths that interest me, answering is so hard.

Usually I just say that I would like to try multiple stuffs, see what fit best and what is appropriate to my condition. Or that I honestly don't really care what I do, as long as I can live off of it in a stable way and doesn't make my condition worse.

But genuinely I have no idea. Because nothing interest me out there. I do not have the energy or the physical strength to go out there and work. Hell I feel dizzy just by carrying something a bit too heavy, I get nauseous just by stretching sometimes even... How the hell am I supposed to make it?

I mean, I do really want to be a doctor. But I know that it's just not something I can physically achieve. I'll forever be cursed to being the one in bed looking back at them.

My mother keep getting annoyed with me, because I'm the one who always has health issues, I'm the one who always go to the doctor.

She said that ''While you have so many appointements, your brother stilm hasn't got his glasses changed and I still haven't taken an appointement for my own issues'' like it's all my fault, very guilt tripping.

It's just so painful. The way she always seem annoyed at the fact that I'm the one with so many issues, I'm the one who need to see a doctor so much.

Like I didn't ask for it either? If I could I would gladly stop going to the hospital and stuffs so much. It's not my fault that my body is failing on me now, is it?

If I could I would just stop having issues, but it's not an option and it's so frustrating that she act like it only affect her, as if I'm not the one who feel like I'm dying everyday...

Hello everyone, I hope you're doing a bit good at least!

I've come here because I need some tips with something, drinking more.

I've noticed that those past few days, I've had struggles drinking normal amount of water, as I've been through a very bad flare up, and my stomach can barely handle anything.

So I wanted to know, people who struggle with stomach problems, how do you manage to drink more? I think maybe drinking more tea might help, but since it's hot outside drinking warm drinks is annoying. But it's kind of the only thing that I can drink sometimes...

We were supposed to go to a concert today, me, my aunt, my mom and my younger brother. I was pretty happy about the idea.

But about 2/3 days ago, I just had the biggest flare up after a few days of peace, and even today I am still struggling to be steady again. I still can barely eat or drink anything without the pain, and even walking is a struggle.

So of course, going out in the evening for 6 hours (until 2 AM), with no way of getting back home if my body give up on me... I just can't take the risk of making it worse.

And it made my mom pretty upset, as it always does everytime I have to cancel something. She's still going with my aunt tho (my little brother is staying over since he was mainly going because I would be there too).

And it just makes me feel so shitty, like damn I can't even have the strength to go out and satisfy my mom that's pretty lame... But at the same time I know that I just can't allow myself to take the risk and end up with even more pain.

I just wish she would understand that.

So I have an appointement with a psychologist tomorrow morning (first time that I go back to a new one after a year, last one was weird) and I'm not gonna lie it's really stressing me out...

I asked for that appointement, but I keep having second thought all the time because I want to speak out about my issues but also I'm scared of looking crazy or that they will try to lock me away or something like that.

I don't think they would actually do it, but at the same time kinda possible...

I have the ''I need to heal and find answers'' mindset but also the ''I want to stay bad and get worse I am nothing if not sick'' mindset at the same time... And I already know that some subjects might never get brought up with anyone as I don't feel safe enough with people to talk about them.

It's really a struggle, and I hope that the psychologist will at least help a bit, or it would mean that I'm just wasting my time and my mother's money...

So this is just a little win for me, but today I went to my Doctor and they did an ultrasound for my uterus and I might have adenomyosis! They still have to run some tests to actually see if they're correct tho.

And even tho normally it's not something that I should be happy about, it actually feel like a victory after staying 10 months without any answers...

So yeah, I really hope it will be correct in a way, so that I finally have a name on what I'm going through!

Sometimes I hate being Aroace for that reason. It's not that I can't feel love, because I'm still able to in my own way. But it's that I feel I'm not worthy of feeling that love and of someone loving me back. I feel like being Aroace makes me someone that shouldn't be loved because I can't love back correctly.

I am scared that if I get with someone, I'll just confuse love with platonic feelings. Or that it won't actually be love but just the need to know that I matter enough to people. Or the jealousy at the concept of someone getting it more easily than me.

I don't have a clear idea of love, therefor everything feels like love to me. It's very annoying. Because I know that no emotions that I am feeling are actual love. But I want to prove that I can love so badly.

So I'm not going to go in details because I don't think I could post it here lol but I feel so so so painfully happy?

Like I feel like my chest is gonna explode from emotions in a good but bad way and I can't stop having thoughts about relapsing and how good it would feel and it's making me feel crazy how much I think about it like really.

I think it's probably because we're late at night but like I feel so excited in a fucked up kinda way and it's just weird and Idk if that feeling got a name or if it will leave or if it's just like my weird imagination playing around and making it so tempting Idk Idk Idk

Sometimes I go like ''Hey I've been managing pretty good lately!'' and then 2 seconds after something completely change and I want to just curl in a ball and never talk to anyone again...

Like I was thinking that just now, and then I opened my Pinterest and apparently all my interests and stuffs have been changed for that damn clean girl aesthetic... And honestly I don't do well with sudden unannounced changes AT ALL.

This just ruined my whole day

I hate this so so so much it literally just happened again with my mother she told me I needed to water the plant before going to bed while we were at diner and it stressed me so bad why didn't she warn me sooner why would she just give me that order right now when she knows my routine is usually diner and sleep right after it makes everything wrong wrong wrong I hate it why can't she understand this.

I have to talk about it with her but it's hard I've already did so much time but she doesn't believe it's that important for me I hate it. I have to talk to her about this again and if she still doesn't respect it I'll just not do anything she ask me that goes through that boundary it's so upsetting I hate it.

I tried to watch it because I was curious, but genuinely couldn't go past like 10 minutes. The first intimate scene and the way they seem to just talk about it all the time... It made me feel nauseous.

I've noticed this with me, even more lately as the summer break is here. But I seriously cannot live without focusing on something.

This past few weeks I've been watching a lot of movies, reading a lot, playing video games all day and forced myself to sleep. And it pratically feel like life got better. Pratically.

But I know it's not true, I just managed to reach such a high level of always being distracted that I don't have the time to think about my real life outside of what's fictional.

I'm not doing better at all, I just don't think about it all. And sometimes it's seriously exhausting.

I feel like it's never gonna get better. Because what does that mean exactly? The second I'll be over with a distraction, when I don't find anything else that interest me enough to make me forget my mind, then what?

I'll just go back to hating everything, not finding anything thrilling... Not seeing a point anymore and considering to end it again? Is it really all that I'm good for? Getting distracted and when it's over, ending it?

I don't really know where to put this with the flair but since it's mainly about my special interest/hyperfixations...

My brain is just like that bundle of curiosity and need for more lately, in a good way! But it's also pretty overwhelming lol.

I am normally watching Supernatural, but then I decided to take a break to watch the Spider-Man movies for the one coming up at the end of the month. And then I decided that I wanted to watch all of the Marvel movies/shows before Doomsday come out, but at the same time I want to watch The Boys and Half-man. And I also want to learn to draw and make a book about every Deer species with informations on them...

It's just too much at once! I don't know what to start withhh because even if I am picking to focus on Marvel first, at the same time I want to see the rest of Supernatural but I also want to watch The Boys... And I cannot watch multiple shows at once it's too hard for me. It's just so confusing omg 😭