u/No_Strike7176

I’ve been getting bad vibes from my sister her husband for awhile. A lot of this could be considered small things. These are recent ones. My sister and I were raised by a covert narcissist, also a lot of codependency and enmeshment for some background.

- BIL asked if I (single mother of 4) would drive 8 hours to my sister’s for her bday, two weeks after the kids and I moved to a new house. ( I didn’t bc that’s crazy) He’s asked me to drive there before “because (my sister) is depressed and feels like no one wants to visit them”.
-BIL once when we were altogether he randomly touched my 10F daughters hair saying he liked how it felt. Maybe nothing, but another time a month or so later touched only her hair apparently checking for bugs after a walk with everyone. Didn’t check anyone else’s hair. Again maybe nothing but my radar has been up, and I’ve been more diligent and taking care that they aren’t alone together. Ive never noticed him do this before.
- My 12M son was using BIL phone messing with a photo app and came across a porn app. It wasn’t installed on the phone, he came across by accident and it may not be BILs fault, I don’t know but as I am heightened this made the list. And have since made a rule to not be on someone else’s phone ever.
- My mother is a covert narc and brother is malignant narc with whom I went NC. But my sister and BIL still have regular contact, and while they haven’t said this, I believe they think I should “reconcile”.
- my sister doesn’t get it that me and the kids coming to visit them 8 hours away is too much for me, and takes it personally. Aside from being a single parent and all the logistics it takes, I also have chronic health issues not the least of which is chronic fatigue and would take a long time to recover after a trip like that.
-I’ve been getting the codependent vibe from sister like, if we don’t visit there she won’t be ok emotionally. If I’m not responding to texts for awhile the texts will just keep coming until I respond and then it can be back to being weeks between texts or whatever it had previously been. This can be my fault in that I tend to be avoidant maybe. Although maybe it is slowly distancing and appropriate for the situation? I did the slow distance from narc brother and mother previously and it was the right thing. This one I don’t know, I’m definitely gun shy and want to avoid another toxic situation. Aside from that I’ve just been getting a bad feeling about being around them. They’ve been really close with my kids and I hate to sever that if it’s not necessary but keeping my kids safe is my first priority. I hesitate to ask people IRL bc so many are of the vibe “never leave/“give up” on family”.

I’ve been getting bad vibes from my sister her husband for awhile. A lot of this could be considered small things. These are recent ones. My sister and I were raised by a covert narcissist, also a lot of codependency and enmeshment for some background.

- BIL asked if I (single mother of 4) would drive 8 hours to my sister’s for her bday, two weeks after the kids and I moved to a new house. ( I didn’t bc that’s crazy) He’s asked me to drive there before “because (my sister) is depressed and feels like no one wants to visit them”.
-BIL once when we were altogether he randomly touched my 10F daughters hair saying he liked how it felt. Maybe nothing, but another time a month or so later touched only her hair apparently checking for bugs after a walk with everyone. Didn’t check anyone else’s hair. Again maybe nothing but my radar has been up, and I’ve been more diligent and taking care that they aren’t alone together. Ive never noticed him do this before.
- My 12M son was using BIL phone messing with a photo app and came across a porn app. It wasn’t installed on the phone, he came across by accident and it may not be BILs fault, I don’t know but as I am heightened this made the list. And have since made a rule to not be on someone else’s phone ever.
- My mother is a covert narc and brother is malignant narc with whom I went NC. But my sister and BIL still have regular contact, and while they haven’t said this, I believe they think I should “reconcile”.
- my sister doesn’t get it that me and the kids coming to visit them 8 hours away is too much for me, and takes it personally. Aside from being a single parent and all the logistics it takes, I also have chronic health issues not the least of which is chronic fatigue and would take a long time to recover after a trip like that.
-I’ve been getting the codependent vibe from sister like, if we don’t visit there she won’t be ok emotionally. If I’m not responding to texts for awhile the texts will just keep coming until I respond and then it can be back to being weeks between texts or whatever it had previously been. This can be my fault in that I tend to be avoidant maybe. Although maybe it is slowly distancing and appropriate for the situation? I did the slow distance from narc brother and mother previously and it was the right thing. This one I don’t know, I’m definitely gun shy and want to avoid another toxic situation. Aside from that I’ve just been getting a bad feeling about being around them. They’ve been really close with my kids and I hate to sever that if it’s not necessary but keeping my kids safe is my first priority. I hesitate to ask people IRL bc so many are of the vibe “never leave/“give up” on family”.

Went to Bible study for the first time in a lot of years today. Thought to myself beforehand I bet the passage will be about marriage and I’ll be the only single person there. Yup I was correct 😭 couples with their kids were there, I brought my kids too. It’s so hard watching the dads interact with their kids and mine don’t have that 💔 💔

Widowed young woman here. Went to Bible study today for the first time in many years. Thought to myself, I bet the passage will be on marriage and I’ll be the only single person there…. Yep… It wasn’t *only* about marriage but majority. 😭 It’s so hard to be around couples, watching the dads interact with their kids and mine don’t have that. 💔

S4 e2 wow dot 1 connected to dot 2. just realized Lorelai was a character witness/reference for Luke twice. Once in Luke’s’ divorcing Nicole with all the lawyers, and obv the second one with the April situation which ended up with Lorelai’s divorce.

What do you think she was looking for? Seems like she was seeing if it was acceptable, which I feel it wouldn’t be for her. Was it only to see Lorelai’s financial situation for the later episodes?

Any homeopathic suggestions to help the body push out a splinter please?

I’m at my limit right now with stupid Father’s Day yesterday and everything. Neither me nor my children have one. My sister and brother in law gave my son a basketball hoop for his birthday a few weeks ago. All fine except this thing requires “at least two adults” to assemble and they did not offer to help assemble it. The one thing I don’t have is “at least two adults”. The two poles got stuck in the wrong position and I’ve been trying for weeks to get them apart. New rule if it has to be assembled either you stay and assemble it or you don’t buy it.

And another thing. Awhile back someone commented on a post about what single parents need. I’ll tell you what we need. We need people to offer help offer to pick up stuff. Offer an hour of time for whatever. To OFFER because at least for me I feel like a burden asking. And I do ask all the freaking time and it freaking sucks. If someone offers it still is hard but it is better. And that’s what I need.

Got a basketball hoop for kids birthday and the poles got stuck in the wrong position. Trying to get them apart. Have tried the tip the company suggested online of dropping it on the ground repeatedly and it worked for one but not for the other and it’s been many many attempts. Any suggestions would be appreciated please!

Hey Dad, lately the dishwasher has been leaking only towards the middle or end of the cycle, I’m guessing when it’s draining. The hoses seem secure to me. Help please!

Lately the dishwasher has been leaking only towards the middle or end of the cycle, I’m guessing when it’s draining. The hoses seem secure to me. Help please!

It’s hot and I don’t want to heat up the house. I’m going to make smoothies with all kinds of goodness in them. What to have with them?