u/iabf31

This year of university I am living on campus. I won't name the school I attend, but it is old. A Catholic university, dating back to the 1800s. There is a very real grave yard on sight.

I started frequenting the area because it was kind of a cool spot with not many people. This is really weird but sometimes I would go there to vent when I had nobody to talk to. I know the people there are dead, but if they were alive at least one of them would listen to what I had to say, I thought.

Yeah well, now weird shit has been happening to me. I was home for the weekend and staying up all night as I often do sitting on the sofa. It was very early morning before the sun started to come up, dead silent, and I heard something fall over and crash. It startled me admittedly, but I did not get up to see what it was.

One of my family members had woken up and upon reaching the kitchen which I had my back turned to, let out a loud gasp. I peered over the sofa and on the rug was a full jug of laundry detergent which we got earlier that day that was sitting on the counter. It had hit the floor with enough force to break open and spill the entirety of its contents out on to the rug.

In the back of my mind there was no way that that should of happened on its own. It was a huge mess and we ended up discarding the whole rug, but I forgot about it quickly. Until days later when a second and later third incident occurred.

I was at school in my dorm getting ready. I have one of those medicine cabinets as a mirror with two doors that you can slide open and I opened it to grab someting. I looked down for a minute to take the cap off of whatever it was I grabbed and something "fell" out of the cabinet and hit me. I wasn't even close to it at that point. I looked at what it was and I couldn't believe it, it was a Tide pen I kept in there. Like, one of those Tide on the go pens that you can use in an emergency if you get a stain on your clothes when you're out.

The third and most explainable event happened just a little while ago. I was at my desk on my computer and I was on a phone call with my phone a couple feet away and the phone suddenly hung up on me. The person called back and I answered confused because I thought I was still in the call. I was gonna ask if they hung up on accident, but before I could they asked me why I hung up instead. I might be able to chalk this one up to a glitch, but still wtf!

All of this reminded me of a similar experience I had many years ago as a young teenager playing with a spirit board when a chopstick "fell" out of a bowl nearby and hit me. So strange, what do yall think?

It hasn't been a whole long since I started taking what I am now (Zoloft, buspirone, propranolol, trazodone). Its doing its job for what its supposed to, my mood and my sleep have improved noticably. However, I am still having some symptoms that aren't being addressed and I now know it's not just a result of anxiety and depression. For one my compulsiveness hasn't settled enough to my liking and it makes me very irritable at times. The other thing that hasn't changed is my body language. I am still very stuff at times, like catatonic. Im not sure what I'm dealing with is paranoia but I know it's not all in my head because other people pick up on my odd behavior too

It hasn't been a whole long since I started taking what I am now (Zoloft, buspirone, propranolol, trazodone). Its doing its job for what its supposed to, my mood and my sleep have improved noticably. However, I am still having some symptoms that aren't being addressed and I now know it's not just a result of anxiety and depression. For one my compulsiveness hasn't settled enough to my liking and it makes me very irritable at times. The other thing that hasn't changed is my body language. I am still very stuff at times, like catatonic. Im not sure what I'm dealing with is paranoia but I know it's not all in my head because other people pick up on my odd behavior too

No this isn't a joke. And to be frank, I quite honestly feel so disgusted when I think about it. This is a warning for animal abuse

In early childhood my mother left us because of emotional abuse from father. Up until the point I reached an adult I was strictly allowed to see her just every other weekend. Eventually she found a new man but come to find out he was a terrible human being.

Before they met my mother had a rat terrier called Jayjay. He was such a cutie, but deep down I feel that my mother and new husband wasn't in the right place to care for him outside of basic plenty food, water, a home, and affection. I don't think he was ever truly potty trained even up till 6 years old. We'd have to deliberately block off the table with chairs and gently push him aside because he wasn't trained. He went on walks and sometimes he'd eat dog poop, possibly because later most the time if he was eating itd be when he was let out.

Whenever my mom met this man these walks seemingly became less frequent and her husband would get extremely mad when he had an accident. In addition to this my mother started working longer time and despite the fact he was home all day long and often in between jobs I think he was scarcley cared for at those times.

He didn't like the dog. He even kicked him once and fired a pellet gun at the wall next to him just to startle him. He was hardly ever whatsoever let out of his dog crate when he demanded that he have one later on. Before when it was just us and we didn't have the crate whenever we'd leave the house he'd always try to wiggle out the door to us so my mom would throw treats across the room for him and then quickly close the door to avoid him getting out. I was too little to realize how cruel this was and it hurts so, so bad. Sometimes he'd run away to what im guessing was in hopes of finding another home but he never did and would eventually turn up hours later.

When I ate I would try to slip him little pieces of food until my stepdad caught me and he wasn't allowed anything else. The dog got really depressed. He stopped eating all together and my moms husband ridiculed me by claiming I made him greedy and he wouldn't eat his normal dog food. He got extremely skinny more and more every time I would visit. I could see his ribs he was so thin. As a child I just assumed he wasn't feeling good for the time being and gave him love when on the rare occasion he was let out. I thought he was just not feeling good and he'd start eating again and everything would be okay but he starved. My mom didn't take him to the vet because she thought the same thing and barely had money to get by.

This is a disgust I've been holding on to for a long time now. Ever since I had the capacity to come to this realization as I got older I feel physically ill when I think about him. Like I could just throw up. I have my own rat terrier now and she's taken care of and loved so much. She's sweetest and most precious innocent little girl, exactly like he was. He didn't deserve this and it hurts so bad knowing he was let down. But every now and then I can't look at my girl and not think of Jayjay. I just wish there was a way I could go back in time and take care of him the same way since I couldn't when I was litte. Its so heartbreaking and the only thing that helps is telling myself he's in a better place now. He passed away right on my bean bag chair, presumably because it had my scent on it, the only thing that could've comforted him in his last moments.

I feel like my terrier is my guardian angel. She knows when I have bad days. I feel like I can just sense it, has having a dog or any pet changed your experience with OCD?

Where can I contact the creators of dead space? Glen Schofield perhaps, but I can't be sure. This isn't about Dead Space 4 or fan mail, but it is a bit of a serious business inquiry and if it gets anywhere I may let you all in on it if I can. I have been meaning to for months now.

My last post stating I have OCD and I might not have schizophrenia might've come off the wrong way. I didn't mean it like that....I guess what I was asking is if it's possible to have both, and from what I got it definitely is. I know this post is useless since technically I've already been answered initially but I do feel bad.

I posted this similarly to the OCD subreddit prior because I can be certain I have that and I was referred here. Im really looking forward to my medication journey on this after suppressing it for so long

You reserve the right to be offended at such a thing given the stigma and all. I apologize. Its a one of a kind harsh reality for a lot of us it seems like a rare concurrent implied upon that schizo obsessive is a heavily debated upon diagnosis. I imagine its a sensitive subject and it's really hard to ask for help if your obsessions are abnormal

I guess I was thinking if I am schizophrenic I would be relieved to out rule it being a possibility for anyone else since it's torturous at worst times.

It said return to sender

I'm not sure I'd label this a win, but it turns out I might not be schizophrenic after all. I have yet to come to terms with this, does anyone suffer from both?