u/maybeimbonkers

I'm extremely unattractive, ugly even. I've even posted many times here in the amiugly subreddit and I've gotten downvoted and some really harsh comments on my looks. My problem is I have terrible jaw issues-- I had braces put in before my jaws had fully developed and so my midface basically collapses due to lack of facial support. So I have a recessed midface and a very narrow lower jaw. To add insult to injury the left and right halves of my face look like they belong to different faces. They don't align at all and are completely different. And this isn't just my assessment. I've been told this by doctors too. The two sides even move differently and while the average person won't catch it, their initial impression would be that something is really off. So my entire face just looks super weird. I even sound weird.

I have anterior pelvic tilt and really large thighs so my body is weird, and of course it had to be topped off with severe hair loss and almost no eyelashes. I could star in the freak show segment of a circus. I went through life seeing guys hit on every girl I was with and humor me. Some wouldn't even look at me, they would talk to the pretty girl and just pretend I didn't exist. Others would talk to me only when they were drunk. My husband was the first guy to even remotely give me attention and tell me I was beautiful. This was almost at 28. By then I had started to develop some nerve issue on one side of the face and the asymmetry was getting more and more prominent, and no guys liked me while being in the arranged marriage process so I married my husband. But I hate being in photos, I'm very conscious of showing my face in public. I still try but I feel like crumpling up and crying every time I see my photo.

I even tried dance performance series and you know how many times they cut me out of the dance videos ? In 200 photos I would probably be in 2 or 3 of them. It's like the entire universe telling me how ugly I am. I'm now 35 and I want to get my jaws and face fixed but I don't know if they can fix everything. Even at my wedding the photographer complained they couldn't get any good photos, because in addition to everything I had bad allergies too and so I looked even worse. To this day we don't have even one wedding photo or any photo of mine hung up in the house.

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I was asked this in an interview. Given a differential amplifier with resistive degeneration, and noise current In**2 in the tail, assuming a parasitic capacitance Cp appears across the tail current what would the noise analysis be ?

I did not have enough time in the interview to get through it. My initial thought was that the tail current cap should not affect the differential mode noise, and assuming everything is exactly matched, a In(Rs+1/gm) noise voltage that develops at the tail at DC, and the noise current flowing through the input pair would cancel out. When the parasitic capacitance starts to factor in at higher frequencies the same should happen. (assuming perfect symmetry). Is this accurate?

I have not worked on die to die architectures before. My understanding is that similar to DDR (a standard I have worked on) , power is of high importance. So then I assumed that they wouldn't employ adc based transceiver architecture. Even CDR is not used. But I've come across a few job descriptions online where the team works on UCI but they apparently use ADCs too? Wouldn't those be significantly power hungry ? Especially when both active and leakage power consumption are of high importance?

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This happens to me all the time and I just feel horrible afterwards. Happened again yesterday. Like I know the actual answer, but I'm either blanking out, or I'm second guessing myself, or my mind is muddled with thoughts and just can't think straight. By the end they offer the answer, and I'm just like...well, yeah I knew that.

I don't know if I can explain this phenomenon to someone without sounding like a crazy person. I do have ADHD. Like the other day for example I was in an interview and was asked which would be more efficient -- voltage mode or current mode logic for a driver. And I'd read Sam Palermo's lectures and how for the same swing you consume lesser power for VM than CML.

He then asked me to write the current in voltage mode with a series resistor, assuming there is a channel and load on the other side. And I write ...gmVgs of the inverter ? I mean I know that we measure the TX signal across RL and it's a voltage division between the TX resistance and RL, and so the current out of the driver is just going to be VDD-Vswing by the total resistance. But...why couldn't I say it?

At that moment, my mind just went blank and I couldn't retrieve information at all. Sure there are things I don't know, but for the things I do know this phenomenon is inexplicable and I've lost faith in myself.

Like outside of interviews I think I know my subject ok. I'm not the most intelligent, I need a lot of time to deeply understand concepts but I'm not that awful. But the perception I give in interviews isn't proportionate I feel ...?

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This happens to me all the time and I just feel horrible afterwards. Happened again yesterday. Like I know the actual answer, but I'm either blanking out, or I'm second guessing myself, or my mind is muddled with thoughts and just can't think straight. By the end they offer the answer, and I'm just like...well, yeah I knew that.

I don't know if I can explain this phenomenon to someone who doesn't have ADHD. Like outside of interviews I think I know my subject ok. I'm not the most intelligent, I need a lot of time to deeply understand concepts but I'm not awful. But the perception I give in interviews isn't proportionate I feel ...

This happens to me all the time and I just feel horrible afterwards. Happened again yesterday. Like I know the actual answer, but I'm either blanking out, or I'm second guessing myself, or my mind is muddled with thoughts and just can't think straight. By the end they offer the answer, and I'm just like...well, yeah I knew that.

I don't know if I can explain this phenomenon to someone who doesn't have ADHD. Like outside of interviews I think I know my subject ok. I'm not the most intelligent, I need a lot of time to deeply understand concepts but I'm not awful. But the perception I give in interviews isn't proportionate I feel ...

If we have a nmos differential amplifier with resistive load (standard gmR gain, ignoring channel length modulation) with ideal tail current source I and output CL on both drain nodes. Then what is the maximum slew rate? (When current is steered to one side). Will it not be set by I?

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I do not have the strength to fight life anymore. I am tired of listening to all the comments—how I might potentially break something, how I am not careful enough, not proactive enough, how so many things have broken in association with me. It’s always me. I am somehow always the culprit, the antagonist, the clumsy, messy, chaotic, dumb, unqualified person incapable of doing anything right. I get everything wrong. I might even get this attempt wrong because of course, how can I get anything right. Not one person respects me. I do not wish the pain I have felt all these years on anyone. No, not anyone. No one should feel inadequate, unworthy, unsure, unaccomplished. No one should have their faith in them steadily decline to the point where they cannot trust themselves anymore. No one should bear the decline of cognition and mental faculties to the point where their brain feels like a spider’s web haze over an empty skull. No one should live every day suffering internal mental breakdowns and then be told they need to fight and be positive or be admonished for harboring negative thoughts. You think if I could fight them I wouldn’t? I have fought umpteen battles in life. For the number of times I have taken hits you should wonder why/how I am still here. Every single, small little thing that could otherwise be accomplished without much difficulty for most people arrives with little result but mired with hardship for me. On top of this I have fought issues for which the resolution and direction arrived much much later, by which time I was well into my 30s.

Anyway. All this is in the past now. I am writing this because today I have chosen to bid farewell to this kind of a life. Enough is enough. I hope you forget me because I do not want to reside in anyone’s memory. But that said I don’t think I am particularly memorable so maybe that should not be difficult.

Thanks to everyone.

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He says the loop gain is given by eq 8.8 as it's identical to the CS stage in fig 8.3b (above). But looking at 8.7c, the loop gain looks to be C1/(C1+C2)?

https://preview.redd.it/wepiv9r792bh1.png?width=1227&format=png&auto=webp&s=b42691285f51664904ca740145c95ad30c3be9a1

here is how I tried to solve by breaking the loop (similar to how he breaks it in fig 8.6)

I got a call the other day from a recruiter a week after I had interviewed with the hiring manager, that they were still interested and it might take a few weeks but he was calling to let me know this. I was a little taken aback because this recruiter's call always goes to spam, but I was able to verify it was him. Then I wrote to him to confirm what he said. He shared this :

"We are still interested in your candidacy while we interview other candidates for the position. I will let you know what the next steps are after all the candidates have been interviewed. 

Please feel free to contact me if further clarification is needed."

Does this mean I'm on a wait-list of some sort and I can't expect next steps 100%?

I really don't. I bought patio cleaner but I think I will use it on myself. I'm 35 and supremely behind in life. I'm a failure. I can't deal with life any more.

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At first glance it seems like In might split into exactly half because the the tail current might see an impedance of 1/gm1 and 1/gm2 at the source of M1/M2, but with the diode connected transistor on one side, wouldn't the impedance of one path be greater than the other? Why does the tail current noise still "choose" to split equally?

Inattentive ADHD, currently on Guanfacine. Can't say it's made a lot of difference.

I wake up feeling extremely depressed. Can't move and feel paralyzed to do anything at all. The only reason I'm surviving is because I currently work from home. I get things ready for my husband 730-8, and then sit in my bed sluggishly moving through the day. I probably get my bearings around 12, and then start to feel like a human around 3-4 pm. By 6 or so I actually feel alert and positive.

Can anyone relate to this ? I was never a morning person, but the extent to which I feel depressed in the day has worsened with age. I'm now 35. I shudder to think of how worse it can get.

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I was asked about a source degenerated diff amp half circuit analysis, and then the interviewer said what if the tail current source had a noise current In**2, what would the noise analysis be?

We were nearing the end of the interview and he had more questions so I did not get the time to answer. How would I solve this?

This is what I see in my work environment, which is the only set of people I'm exposed to other than my partner, thanks to the hours I work and becoming a deeper introvert as the years progress.

Literally everyone is better than me. They speak better. They work better. They are not as chaotic, as garbled, as messy, as awkward, as behind as me. They're lauded, recognized, respected. But I'm the perennial black sheep. In my head I think I know something but I will never articulate it well. I have 15 tabs or sessions always open. They are always freezing when I need to share my screen in a meeting. I'm dumber than a bag of rocks. Heck there are probably children out there who are smarter and sharper than me. Every day my brain feels like a heavy bag of lead with a fog of dust over it. Accessing information and thoughts is an actual chore.

Why? I can't go through life this way. I'm sick of looking like an incompetent nincompoop.

I seem to shut down in interviews if a topic comes up that I have to think about, or haven't extensively reviewed before the interview. Like the other day I was asked questions about differential amplifier orientations and which one I would prefer as a designer, and then a transfer function when there is a parasitic cap across the tail current source. I was also asked a feedback question.

I analyze feedback loops in detail and use 2 or 3 sanity points to check my analysis every time. I answered wrong the first time, the interviewer's face fell and he coaxed me with some leading questions. Then I explained my thinking and eventually realized where I went wrong and answered again.

Then he asked another question about slowing one of the feedback loops in a current mirror down and we eventually got to adding a resistor. It was leading to adding the resistor as an added benefit of filtering the reference noise on the current source. Again, a concept I had studied and solved problems on before and just went blank in the interview.

I even answered the point about the tail current source with a parasitic cap across it wrong. The cap should not factor in the differential half circuit but I said it would. Although I knew it should affect common mode gain.

Admittedly I've been under tremendous stress at work but this seems to be happening a lot. Also each interview feels like a pressure point where I just have to make it. How do you remain calm and answer confidently in interviews?

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I have this schematic of a serializer retiming stage followed by 2:1 mux (not shown). When sampling even and odd data, they are sampling even when clk is low, using a latch, and odd through a FF on the rising edge of the clock. Even is muxed when clock is high and odd when clock is low. Why can't we use a latch for the odd data which would be transparent when clock is high? Would that violate setup time?