Am I [31f] overreacting to BPD + Asperger’s brother [40m] doing this when I was 16 and he was 25?
When I was 16, I left my bedroom door open. I had some clothes I wore lying around like a messy teenager does. My brother liked to pace around the house.
He paced into my room. As to whether he did that usually when my door was open, I don’t remember. I had a dirty bra on my dresser. I happened to catch him pacing into my room and picking up one of my bras then putting it down real quickly.
I also another time, when he accidentally opened the door to me changing. I had on a tight tank top the same color as my flesh. He opened the door not realizing I was in there and his eyes immediately darted to my chest.
I wanted space from him and was told by my mom I was “tearing the family apart” a therapist my parents hired as a teenager said “he was just curious”
He’s scrawny now so I’m not worried about him beating me up now. But when I was younger he was violent to me, so I came to really resent him and yes fear him on some level.
I confronted him about what he did recently about a month ago. He apologised after I lectured him on how his actions when I was 16 scared me and he said he said sorry and that he did it “without intent.”
If one of my siblings has kids, would it be wrong to warn them about this? Or warn future boyfriends before things get more serious?
For the record I have Asperger’s too. I’m tired of my brother being excused.