r/PregnancyAfterTFMR

I miss my baby a lot today. TMFR’d at 26 weeks back in June. Her due date was September 25th. We planted a tree, had a breakfast with my family, put away everything in her nursery. It was so so hard and so beautiful as well. I was anticipating how hard the emptiness and grief would be after her due date when there’s nothing to ‘look forward to’ there’s just nothing. I miss her so much it physically hurts. My sweet baby Wynne is my first and only baby. We began trying last month, I wish I wasn’t trying to get pregnant right now, I wish I was holding my baby girl. I’m so sad.

I got my nipt back and it was normal, that felt like the first hurdle. I just had my 13 week NT scan and it was all looking good. I’m so so hopeful but still cautious. They offered me a 16-18 week scan but I didn’t think it was necessary since I’ll have the 20 week scan. Wondering if anyone has accepted an additional scan and if anything came up on that or should I just wait for the 20 week.

After two back to back tfmr for lethal skeletal dysplasia ( April 2024 at 20 weeks and January 2025 at 17 weeks ) I'm currently 18 weeks 6 days pregnant and this morning was my anatomy scan everything looks good and measuring normal thanks God.

My doctor told me I need to get my depression and anxiety in check or the stress will prevent but from getting pregnant and while I take her point to an extent, this has me spiraling a bit. In addition to the grief, after three unsuccessful cycles I’m starting to panic that there is something wrong with me (dr says otherwise). I know that’s not an unusual amount of time but I hoped maybe the odds would work in my favor for once. I’m also turning 35 tomorrow. So all of this has me crashing out a bit today.

Can anyone share the experience of getting pregnant again even if you weren’t back in peak mental status? Thank you 🙏

I (28F) and my husband (30M) just had a TFMR 3 days ago. We lost our baby girl to trisomy 18 at 14 weeks, after our baby's NT (8.1mm) and eFTS (positive) was flagged at her 12 week scan. An early anatomy scan in the days that followed revealed a heart defect, fluid in her lungs (fetal hydrops) and several physical anomalies, along with high risk NIPT for trisomy 18 which was confirmed with CVS. We are devastated. This was our first ever pregnancy, and it took us exactly 1 year of trying to conceive that pregnancy. We prepped our bodies for a year, took prenatals and all the supplements, ate the right foods, avoided alcohol / caffeine / smoking, exercised, I even did fertility accupuncture. No family history either on either side for genetic conditions. It feels like despite being young when the odds should have 'been in our favour' we did all the right things only to still end up with a traumatic outcome that was out of our control. Unfortunately I know noone else who went through this, so its hard for me to process how to move forward or even cope - being stuck between mourning the baby we just lost and enduring that pain and so badly wanting a family in the future and knowing that will only happen once we heal. We ultimately want to wait 2 cycles to mentally / physically heal and get back our genetic testing for me and my husband before ttc but I'm terrified. The doctors told us the likelihood of this happening again is extremely low and it was "just bad luck" but its completely changed my perception of pregnancy (the innocence truley is lost after an experiance like this). Is there light at the end of the tunnel? For those that did get their rainbow babies or experianced something similar - how long did it take and any tips to move forward in this process (anything in terms of healing, health recovery, things you did different etc)?

I apologize for posting here about this, but I am feeling very anxious and feel that it may help me to plan and look forward to something once all of this is behind me, which I understand will likely never be truly fully behind me.

I am 39 years old, currently 14 weeks and received a high risk NIPT for T21 at 12 weeks. I had two scans done since the NIPT, both of which looked normal from seeing the nasal cavity and the nuchal fold measurement standpoint, which I understand does not mean anything at all. I went in for a CVS at 13 weeks, but was told that due to the placement of my placenta it would be too risky to perform and advised that I wait for an amnio, which I preferred anyways. My amnio is scheduled for next week.

At this point, everyone is acting as though the NIPT is accurate and that it is silly to hold out any hope due to my age and PPV of the NIPT. I want to schedule a D&E and my questions is two fold: did you wait for your amnio results to schedule or were you proactive and put one on the calendar prior to full results? The agony of waiting longer is really doing a number on me. Also, I feel that due to my age I do not have the luxury of waiting a long time in between to start trying (my partner is going to be 46) and I want to start taking COQ10 immediately and give myself a cycle or two and then TTC. Has anyone taken COQ10? Is it okay to take while still pregnant waiting for my D&E? I know I may feel much different once I have the D&E, but right now the motivation to start trying again is weirdly helping me, while at the same time I am having an awful thought that (even though I am not very religious myself, but grew up religious) that I am trying for a "healthy" baby and why should God honor and bless me with such a thing if I am going to terminate an innocent child's life due to their T21 diagnosis. It is all I keep thinking about...

I lost my little girl at 21 weeks in March, I am now 22 weeks pregnant in my sub pregnancy and very grateful for what seems to be a healthy pregnancy, even getting to this point seemed impossible.

I’m having a particularly bad week, no reason, just because. I think about her every day and sometimes it’s just too overwhelming. It’s not fair, she should be here. I unpack things I bought for her and even though I will have a baby (hopefully) very soon, the sense of guilt that she was supposed to have those things is immense.

I see people looking at me thinking I’m having my second baby, but I’m not, this is my third. I see little girls and think what would my little girl have looked like. I can’t help but peek at the girls clothes as I walk by in shops knowing I may never get to buy them. My little boy talks about his new brother or sister but doesn’t know he already has a sister who he’d of loved.

I don’t know if I’m having a girl or boy, nub theory says boy, but who knows and I’m just terrified of knowing either way for different reasons which is a minefield of emotions in itself along with everything else.

Grieving your baby while carrying your next bundle of joy, is like a wound being healed then ripped open over and over again. It just sucks.

Edit: I am not pregnant - prepping TTC

Not asking for medical advice, just curious if there is a pattern. I am taking about 16 pills each day and I am afraid they might be causing some significant digestion issues. Yes, I have been taking them with meals. I take the bulk of them at lunch and the other half of the CoQ10 pills after dinner.

My current regime:

Jarrow CoQ10 (600 mg) - 6 pills
NatureMade Prenatal - 1 pill
Nordic Naturals Prenatal DHA - 2 pills
NatureMade Vitamin D3 (4,000 IU) -2 pills
NatureMade Choline (800 mg) - 3 pills
Jarrow B12 (2,000 mcg) - 2 pills

If I had to cut any out it would be the choline and I would just eat three eggs each day.

Super frustrating because I am so paranoid after experiencing a loss and I really want this next pregnancy to go smoothly.

Anyway, I have an appt with my PCP tomorrow to see if I can get some relief. The acid reflux has been so intense that I haven’t been able to sleep the last couple of nights.

Anyone else have a similar issue with any of the supplements above?

A week ago today, I lost my baby boy at 20 weeks due to incompetence cervix and bulging membrane ( baby was perfect and there were no issues).We decided on a D&E due to not wanting to go through the trauma of birthing/labor and seeing our dead baby.

This was my second IVF transfer and pregnancy - our daughter who is now 14 months was our first IVF transfer. D&E recovery is going well physically, minimal pain and I barely bleed with panty liners.

My two week follow up appointment is next week, so I’m hoping to hear good news about the state of my uterus and getting cleared.

But now I’m having thoughts about when I can get pregnant again. My body is telling me soon, but I know that I need and should wait to let it heal and replenish before going for another transfer. I was thinking about if everything is going well with my body and my period stabilizes with birth control that we could try for our third transfer December of next year (so 14 months after d&e)

Has anyone else gone through a similar situation and was successful with a FET after a second trimester loss?

Someone told us they are pregnant today and I can’t believe how triggered I am. :( I am surprising myself. Folks who can go worry free throughout their pregnancy, not ever experiencing the heartbreaking loss that I’ve had to experience — that no mom should have to experience. Just feeling a lot of grief.

I am currently 33 weeks with my sub pregnancy. So far everything has been going well. Today I just received an email about genetic counseling for an upcoming appointment and intake forms. But I do not have an appointment. I even checked with labcorp which is where the email is from and my portal says no appointments. I tried calling the number but of course no answer so I left a message. I feel like I’m spiraling. I just need to know this was a mistake and it was accidentally sent to me. I know I’m overthinking it all

Hi everyone! I conceived naturally just before we were about to start IVF. I found out I was pregnant on August 2, and since then everything had been going well, with the baby growing normally.
At 10+1 weeks, I had a NIPT done, but the result came back with a low fetal fraction. Yesterday I had a fetal anatomy scan, and the doctor told me that the baby has a single umbilical artery and that the right foot appears to be turned in. I was told that these are two soft markers for chromosomal abnormalities.
I repeated the genetic test, but I’m still waiting for the results.
What do you think? Has anyone been through something similar and had a positive outcome? I’m extremely worried and would really appreciate hearing about your experiences.

I lost my first pregnancy earlier this year around 8 weeks. I never found out the cause. We just found out or second pregnancy is positive for triploidy at 17 weeks and are proceeding with TFMR. I'm devastated about this baby but also feeling a little hopeless about the future. I can't stop wondering if the first loss was also due to triploidy. The genetic counselor kept telling me that the odds of a recurrent triploidy pregnancy is 1%, but the odds of my baby testing positive for Triploidy at 16 weeks was .003% so the statistics really don't mean much to me right now.

I have PCOS and anovulation so I need to go through a fertility clinic to get pregnant anyway. The first two were conceived with letrozole and timed intercourse, but that took a while so I'm wanting to jump straight to IVF this time around. My clinic offers PGT-A testing, but it is very expensive and does not look for triploidy, so I'm not sure if that would even help my anxiety.

For those of you who TFMRed or lost pregnancies due to triploidy or other chromosomal abnormalities not covered by PGT-A, did you find that PGT-A testing embryos helped ease your anxiety of a recurrent loss/TFMR or were you still just as worried? Also, were you able to get your insurance to cover any of the PGT-A testing?

Anything else I should ask for to see if I'm maybe at increased risk of eggs resulting in triploidy? We are still waiting for the full results, but she has asymmetric growth lag so they are presuming it was of maternal origin. I'm meeting with my fertility clinic soon for an IVF consult and I want to make sure I ask the right questions.

So I tfmr in May due to bilateral MCDK & now I’m currently 9w pregnant & they told me there’s basically extra fluid around the body in the transvaginal ultrasound & this could be indicative of a trisomy. I just can’t believe I’m back in this depressing place of torturous worry. I go for NIPT Monday but I really can’t even be hopeful. I just don’t know what’s wrong with me I feel like embarrassed that I can’t make a healthy baby. Meanwhile crackheads are. Anyway. Idk what I’m looking for here just getting it out.