u/HEY_McMuffin

I met someone online (we live in the same city) and we have been talking for a few weeks, everyday and it’s felt so fun and natural. We were supposed to meet for the first time today to go for coffee and book shopping… I messaged her yesterday to confirm place and time but then she never messaged me back

I was so excited to finally have a friend… this is the 3rd time this has happened where I get to know someone well but then the day is comes to meet in person they ghost me… I’m not pushy at all, we mutually talk about meeting up and pick a day and then nothing.

I’m trying to not take it personal but I’ve been looking forward to this for over a week. Planned a nice outfit, listened to podcasts on how to be a good friend and conversation starters so there is no awkward silences

I feel like I could be such a good friend to someone but no one has ever wanted to be.

I met someone on bumble bff after being on there for a year and we really hit it off! We have been talking every day for two weeks and she seems like a copy and paste of me in so many ways. She is really easy to joke with and we give off the same… energy I guess? So we made plans to go book shopping and go get a coffee or find a patio somewhere after

In person, I am very shy and usually quiet until I get to know someone better and then my weird comes out … she said she is the same way!

Do you have any tips? I feel like I am going on a date and I am so nervous😅 I really want this to form into a true friendship

I LOVED this book 😫 it’s my first book I have read from this author and would now like to keep going… what is your favourites from her?

Not the traditional ghosted… I just stopped messaging her first and chasing after her, planning get together etc. I would make plans with her but they seemed empty on her end, not committing anymore. and it’s now been 6 years. I did cave a few times and reached out each time she had a baby so I’ve met the two babies and also sent her heart felt texts asking if everything ok and why she doesn’t seem to want to put any effort into our friendship.. she said sorry she’s just been depressed and I tried reaching out to her but then just get two word texts back. So I gave up

She messaged me last night saying “wow it’s crazy we have 10 year old hey? How it going?”

I replied back and asked how old her other kids are now and the youngest is 4 and it just made my heart sink… 4? You haven’t thought of me in 4 years?

I don’t know how I feel about her reaching out. I know she said she’s been struggling with depression but so do I… I don’t just ignore the people that mean a lot to me so it shows where I stand on her scale.

I’ve been struggling a lot with the loss of my friend and have been sad, angry, bitter about the whole thing, going through waves. Explaining to my kids why they don’t see their friends anymore. We used to text daily, hang out weekly, bake Christmas cookies together, go to each others kids birthdays.

Oh I did cave and texted her again if she would like to come to my 30th birthday party 2 years ago and she said she had plans with her family that day. She never texted me happy birthday, didn’t try to make plans. So I have given her so many openings and chances because I miss her so much. But I guess he doesn’t feel the same way.

But now she reaches out? What if she ghosts me again? That will crush me

I found a charming place that it offering high tea on Mother’s Day (hats and gloves optional) it sounds so cute and fun so I asked my mom and grandma if they would like to go. They said yes but my grandma has a guest from out of town that she doesn’t really like but my grandpa is pushing her to include this guest in our plans… so she asked if she could come along. I don’t know her but suuuure what ever.

I bought the 4 tickets yesterday and then on a group message we just started joking around about inviting the people we don’t like. Like me inviting my MIL and my mom joked about inviting her MIL. All in good fun.

My mom texts me privately saying “should I really invite MIL? She will say no but then she can never complain again that she’s not invited to anything even tho she always says no when I invite her because she hates me so much ” (They have had huge issues with her, she’s an awful narcissist that has blown up a few times recently and putting guilt on them for not visiting enough) I said absolutely not… what if she actually says yes? Don’t play that game. If you want invite her to go buy flowers that day.

Well my mom calls me crying last night because she really did go through with it and her MIL said yes. Play childish games win stupid fucking prizes. I’m livid. I hate this broad. She calls my family “those people” and she finds negativity in literally anything. I’ve never heard a positive or kind thing come out of her mouth.

Now I feel like crying. I’m half tempted to just give them the tickets and say “have fun”… I was trying to plan a nice memory and now it’s this twisted stupid game with the worst human I’ve ever met.

TLDR: Would I be over reacting if I gave the tickets for Mother’s Day high tea to my mom/grandma because they invited people they hate and now it’s not fun, not a nice fond memory to look back on.