u/Silliestgoose8900

So I have a 15 Mini Cooper that I love it’s the most important thing in my life and I treat it extremely well and refuse to sell it one thing I notice is it’s odd behavior though I know maybe some of it can be explained through mechanics as I’m very into cars myself but idk some stuff just feels off. For example, sometimes the clutch will randomly start slipping super badly usually this wouldn’t just go away but on the car if I sit for only like 5-10 minutes it completely stops, when I had hydroplaned from water hitting the car hard from a truck it started steering to the other lane but quickly corrected itself on its own, also I’ve had two instances where I should’ve rear ended someone but it literally stopped in its tracks, it also plays Micheal Jackson by itself when I start it up I don’t know why it does that I don’t even usually listen to it, also when I start it it glitches and doesn’t fully turn on but this could be battery issues even though the battery reads as fine? It also randomly started accelerating by itself a tiny bit the other day It’s kept running when it really shouldn’t be it’s has not super great service history and has so many issues but still keeps driving I’m not sure tbh and one time when I was driving it randomly started chiming for the passenger seat when nothing was in it that the seatbelt needed to be buckled and it went away after with no changes I feel a two sided relationship with it but maybe it’s in my head I’m sure I left other things out but yeah. I’m just wondering if this sounds like anything I’m not really into paranormal stuff so idk just wanted to ask ppl who know ab it.

About a week ago I had a really bad experience with THC where I greened out at a lake at night. It was genuinely terrifying and I haven’t touched weed or vaped since because I never want to feel like that again. I called my fired during and he calmed me down but the way I felt at the lake was genuinely terrifying and it felt like a dream and I was at one point walking under a bridge and it felt like it was never gonna end.

Tonight I went to a lake again. Completely different one. It was dark, cloudy and rainy, but I was actually having a really good time and wasn’t anxious beforehand. I was feeding ducks and walked really close to this huge glowing sign. Suddenly I got this extremely specific sensation that felt exactly like when I was high and it hit me super hard and I greened out

It scared me immediately because it felt so identical that I actually started questioning whether I had somehow taken something even though I know I haven’t touched THC in over a week.

After that my heart started racing, my muscles/arm were cramping, I felt extremely scared and I started getting pretty intense derealization. Everything just felt so scary, and I genuinely felt like I was under the influence again even though I was sober. Things felt unreal and it felt like I was high even tho I didn’t take anything and sensory stuff felt weird and things felt darker.

I eventually got home and I’m still feeling somewhat derealized. Looking back, I’m wondering if being at a dark lake again especially with the cloudy/rainy weather and then getting really close to that bright sign somehow triggered my brain because of what happened the first time.

Has anyone else had something like this after a really bad weed experience? Like getting panic/derealization while completely sober because a place or visual sensation reminded you of being high? Can your brain really recreate the feeling that accurately?

I’m 17F and I have a close friend who’s 18M and I need some advice. We’ve gotten pretty close over the past couple months and I’ve developed feelings for him, but I genuinely can’t tell whether he likes me too or if he just sees me as a good friend.

He told me he stopped asking people out years ago after he got rejected and about a month ago he was saying he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend because he works a lot and doesn’t have much time.

We text each other stuff basically every day, and he usually initiates daily by replying to a lot of my Instagram Notes. He’s invited me to hang out one on one multiple times, invited me to a concert where he paid for the tickets and drove me even tho I have a car even tho we did meet with an mutual friend there he was late cuz he had a date before it so we had a good amount of one on one time, but usually when we hang out it’s 1 on 1 even tho we do share a mutual friend.

Yesterday I posted a Note saying “I want to date someone” and he replied “dont we all” I responded “ yes yes 👀” He didn’t directly continue the topic after that, but he kept talking to me normally and sending me things. What confuses me is that this seems pretty different from him previously saying he wasn’t looking for a relationship.

Something else happened recently that showed me a different side of him. I got way too high while I was out alone and became extremely disoriented. I couldn’t figure out where I was, had trouble finding/recognizing my own car, and at one point couldn’t even tell whether my car was running. I texted him because I was freaking out.

He immediately told me not to drive, called me because based on my texts I was clearly dis oriented and I said I needed help, and stayed on the phone with me for over an hour. I ended up crying and saying a lot of really vulnerable stuff about feeling stupid, feeling like I keep making mistakes, and feeling like I’m a burden to people.

He was pretty stern with me, but he also told me about his own mistakes. He said he previously had a problem with weed and that he was basically doing for me what he wished someone had done for him. He also talked about recently crashing a car he’d just bought and how at the time he felt like his life was over, because I kept saying my mistakes made me a bad person.

After I got home and woke up the next morning he had texted me twice asking if I made it home ok, I apologized for putting all of that on him. He told me to stop acting like I had forced my problems onto him because he chose to help me. He said he doesn’t mind being there for a friend who needs him, would rather help than do nothing, and was mostly just glad I was okay.

The part that confuses me is that he calls me things like “bro,” “homie,” and “friend” pretty often, although that’s also just how he normally talks. He’s never directly told me he likes me or explicitly asked me on a date. I also ended up admitting during the call that he’s basically the only person I consistently talk to, and he seemed genuinely surprised by that.
He does choose to text me everyday despite working every day of the week and I also do call him bro Aton to cuz it’s apart of my vocabulary so idk. Does it seem like he could return my feelings?

Im 17F and he’s 18M and I need some advice We’ve become pretty close friends over the past several months, and I’ve developed feelings for him. The problem is that neither of us has ever directly said anything romantic, and our normal way of talking is very casual. We call each other “bro/man,” joke around, send reels, etc., so sometimes I genuinely can’t tell whether there’s romantic tension underneath it or whether I’m projecting because I like him.

When we first met in person, he asked if I wanted to go back to his house with him afterward. I declined because I wasn’t comfortable doing that yet. We still kept getting closer after that, though, so it wasn’t like he disappeared when I said no.
For a long time he would text me basically every day. A lot of the time he was the one always initiating through story’s and notes I’d post on Instagram, including morning texts, sending me videos/reels, responding to things I posted, or just starting conversations for no particular reason. It became normal for us to talk every day. He works usually 7 days a week and usually long shifts and doesn’t have much time off so I thought that was interesting since he was using his little free time to text me.

We’ve also hung out alone multiple times. We’ve gone on drives together just because we wanted to hang out, and there have been times where he’s specifically chosen to spend time one-on-one with me instead of it always being a group thing. He invited me to a concert once, and at first I genuinely couldn’t tell if he meant it as a date or just hanging out because he wasn’t very explicit about it he drove me to the concert 1 on 1 (I have my own car and can drive) but we met up w a mutual friend when we where there, he also drove me home 1 on one and paid for my ticket and I didn’t even know the band.

There have also been a few situations involving other guys where his reactions stood out to me. If I tell him something suggesting a guy is flirting with me, that I might be dating someone, etc., he sometimes seems noticeably more interested or reactive than he is with random topics. I don’t want to call it jealousy because I can’t know that for sure, but it has happened enough that I notice it. But he had told me to not hang out with weird guys or to block them.

Something else that feels significant is that I’ve had some family/housing problems, and he has talked about the possibility of me staying with his family after I turn 18 and paying rent. He didn’t just say it once and immediately take it back either. When I brought it up again later, he basically said we could discuss it with his family when the time gets closer.
At one point I told him there was a possibility I might move far away. His immediate response was basically that he was going to miss me but he hoped it would be better there. He also asked where I was moving and seemed genuinely interested in what I was going to do.

He recently reacts to romantic-ish reels I send him with a broken heart emoji 💔, which confuses me. He reacts to normal things with hearts or random emojis too, so I know emojis alone don’t mean much, but the heartbreak reaction has happened more than once specifically on things that have a relationship/romantic undertone. I can’t tell if it’s just his sense of humor, if he’s relating to the reel, or if he’s indirectly reacting to the implication of me sending it to him.

The part making me doubt everything recently is that his communication suddenly dropped for several days. He stopped initiating as much and wasn’t doing the normal morning/random texting nearly as often. There was also a fairly stressful event in his life around the same time cuz he got into a fender bender with a car he bought like a week ago and his normal routine seemed to change generally, so I don’t know whether it was about me.
He hasn’t completely stopped talking to me. If I ask him something specific, he can still respond really quickly and sometimes keeps the conversation going. Recently he’s started talking to me a little more again. It’s mostly that it doesn’t feel the same and idk why he’s stopped texting me as much.

There was never a fight, confession, rejection, argument, or awkward incident between us that would obviously explain him pulling away.

Im 17F and I’ve been working at Discount Tire for about a month. I took the job because I’m genuinely really into cars and I want to become a mechanic eventually, so I thought it would be a good place to start getting actual hands on experience.
Instead, I feel like I’ve barely been allowed to learn anything and my confidence is honestly worse than when I started.

I’m the only girl in the shop. My original trainer who was the manager was gone for around two weeks when I started, so I ended up getting shown random parts of the process by different people instead of consistently being trained from start to finish. Even now, people will constantly jump in and take over things before I can do them myself.
Today I was literally about to jack up a car and another coworker just took the jack from me and did it himself. I also only got to balance one tire all day. I did the whole thing correctly by myself with no help, but instead of having me keep practicing, the manager who was supposed to be training me had me go run dead tires instead. This happens constantly. I’m always being told to run deads, do air checks, set torque wrenches, clean, or just stand around while everyone else actually takes wheels off, mounts and dismounts tires, and uses the machines.

One coworker even told me that if he ran the shop he would “just have me on air check.”
The manager’s grandson works there too, but he’s not a manager himself. He’s just another employee, yet he talks to me like he has authority over me. Today he just told me “you’re on deads.” He has been snarky toward me basically since I started, even before I had enough time there for him to really know whether I was good at the job or not.
The other day I clocked out at 4:45, which was literally when I was scheduled to leave, and he said “of course you’re clocking out before you finish all the deads.” It sounded like he was calling me lazy for leaving at my scheduled time.

He’s also gotten irritated at me over strength stuff. One day we had a really heavy Chevy Suburban tire and I genuinely could not lift it. I tried multiple times and was physically straining as hard as I could, but I just could not get it up. He told me I was “never gonna get better if I don’t try,” even though I literally was trying and just wasn’t physically strong enough to lift that particular tire. That honestly bothered me a lot because there’s a difference between refusing to try and your body just not being able to move something that heavy yet.

Then my manager called me aside at one point specifically because he said I wasn’t progressing enough. He told me multiple people had apparently complained that I wasn’t “catching on,” wasn’t paying attention, and that it seemed like I “don’t care.”

That honestly really hurt because that wasn’t how I felt at all. I cared a lot when I started. I was genuinely trying to learn and wanted to get better. I just constantly felt like different people were training me at different stages, taking over before I could finish things, or expecting me to already know things I hadn’t really gotten enough practice doing. So being told that people thought I “didn’t care” felt like I was being blamed for not progressing in an environment where I didn’t feel like I was actually being allowed to progress.

There have also been a couple situations with the managers grandson that bothered me more than just the comments. One time we were working on a car together. I jacked up the front/my side of the car, and he apparently forgot to jack up the rear on his side before taking the tire off. When it became obvious something was wrong, he looked at me like it was somehow my fault. Another coworker who is actually friends with him corrected him and pointed out that he was the one who didn’t jack his side.
Another time he almost hit me in the face with an impact gun. Again, that same coworker called him out on it even though they’re friends.

He also made a comment while I was standing right next to him cuz we were working on one about how MINIs are “way too small.” He knows I drive a MINI. I know that comment by itself sounds stupid and minor, but it wasn’t said playfully. It was just another one of those little comments where I feel like he takes shots at me and I usually just laugh it off because he’s the manager’s grandson and I don’t want drama.

There’s also another coworker in his 20s who made me uncomfortable. He asked me out on a date even though I’m 17, and after that he kept trying to interact with me in ways that felt pushy. He would ask me to share food with him, keep asking if I was okay, and keep trying to engage when I was obviously uncomfortable. Eventually I removed him from social media and stopped really talking to him cuz I initially gave it to him to be nice. I’m not saying every single thing he did was malicious, but being the only teenage girl in the shop while an adult coworker had already tried to date me definitely made me more uncomfortable there.

I know I’m not perfect at the job either. I’m small and there are some huge truck and SUV tires that I genuinely struggle to lift. There have also been some very high torque specs I physically struggled with. I understand that those are real limitations and I’m not pretending I’m already as strong or fast as everyone else.

But I don’t understand how struggling with a giant truck tire means I shouldn’t be allowed to practice jacking normal cars, balancing wheels, mounting and dismounting tires, etc. I feel like I’m stuck in this loop where they don’t let me get enough repetitions to improve, then I’m treated like I’m inexperienced because I haven’t had enough repetitions.
The heat has also become a serious problem for me. I’m in Arizona and the shop gets extremely hot. I’ve been getting overheated a lot and today I was getting dizzy. I kept going inside/the bathroom because I felt like I needed to cool down and they just had me standing around doing nothing.
My manager eventually told me I keep “disappearing” and that now I need to tell the crew chief every time I go inside. Later he asked if I was okay because I kept leaving the floor. I told him I thought I was getting too hot and he sent me home because, in his words, having me gone every ten minutes “wasn’t doing him any good.”
I actually felt significantly better once I left and cooled down.

I understand why management doesn’t want someone constantly disappearing, so I’m not trying to pretend that part is completely unreasonable. But now I feel uncomfortable even going inside to cool down because I feel like I’m being watched for it.
The thing I keep wondering about is whether being the only girl is affecting how I’m being treated. I don’t want to scream sexism every time someone corrects me or gives me a bad task. I know I’m new and I know I have things to improve.

But newer male employees seem to get more chances to actually do things, while I feel like I got labeled as someone who should do air checks and dead tires almost immediately. Some people were dismissive toward me from basically the beginning, before they could have realistically formed an opinion based on my work. After a month, I honestly feel like I’ve barely progressed because I’m not being allowed to do enough to progress.

I went into this job genuinely excited because I love cars and wanted to learn. Now I dread going in because I spend so much of the day standing around in a hot garage feeling useless while everyone else does the work I actually wanted to learn.

I have an interview with O’Reilly Auto Parts tomorrow and I have a friend who works at another nearby location who said he’ll vouch for me. I’m seriously considering leaving Discount Tire, working at a parts store for now, learning more about parts and customer service, and then trying another actual repair shop when I’m older.

I’m mostly just wanting outside opinions on how all of this sounds

I 17f like a guy 18m we talk everyday cuz he usually reply’s to my story’s and notes and I like him and we’ve been getting closer for about a month he works up to 14 hours a day and doesn’t have a lot of free time to hang out but still chooses to text me daily.

He invited me to a concert earlier this week and paid for the tickets. at first I thought it was 1 on 1 but he did invite a mutual friend of ours who knows the band (I don’t know the band at all and he still invited me) however the mutual friend had a date before it so he was late.

I have a car and can drive but he still offered to pick me up so I took up the offer so he picked me up from my house and we talked on the way there and also where one on one for walking into it and stuff we where just talking about a lot of different stuff he also paid to get me water.

Later on, the mutual friend showed up when his date was over they where talking a lot more during the concert but I’m assuming it’s cuz they both knew the band and I didn’t at all but he was still talking to me and including me in stuff.

He drove me back home after and told me he’s off Tuesday and if I want to do anything to let him know and told me to be safe and fist bumped me (he does this when saying bye idk what it means), I’m just wondering if it sounds like he likes me and if the way the hangout was arranged seemed kinda like a date or nah.

I 17f like a guy 18m we talk everyday cuz he usually reply’s to my story’s and notes and I like him and we’ve been getting closer for about a month he works up to 14 hours a day and doesn’t have a lot of free time to hang out but still chooses to text me daily.

He invited me to a concert earlier this week and paid for the tickets. at first I thought it was 1 on 1 but he did invite a mutual friend of ours who knows the band (I don’t know the band at all and he still invited me) however the mutual friend had a date before it so he was late.

I have a car and can drive but he still offered to pick me up so I took up the offer so he picked me up from my house and we talked on the way there and also where one on one for walking into it and stuff we where just talking about a lot of different stuff he also paid to get me water.

Later on, the mutual friend showed up when his date was over they where talking a lot more during the concert but I’m assuming it’s cuz they both knew the band and I didn’t at all but he was still talking to me and including me in stuff.

He drove me back home after and told me he’s off Tuesday and if I want to do anything to let him know and told me to be safe and fist bumped me (he does this when saying bye idk what it means), I’m just wondering if it sounds like he likes me and if the way the hangout was arranged seemed kinda like a date or nah.

Im 17F and recently started working at a tire shop. I’m also the only girl working there. One of my coworkers is in his 20s and has been giving me a lot of attention since I started, and it’s making me uncomfortable.

He asked for my number but I didn’t want him having it so I gave my Instagram instead, keeps coming over to talk to me or waving at me, comments on my Instagram notes in person, and has messaged me outside of work and was even yelling at me when I was closing out and walking to my car asking if I wanted food. He’s asked me to go out with him more than once, but he asks in kind of vague ways where at first I thought he meant hanging out and then he called it a date.

He also keeps calling me “girl,” has patted/tapped my shoulder, and one time a romantic song was playing at work and he said, “this is for you, \\\[my name\\\].”

I haven’t flirted with him or given him any extra attention. I actually try to go to other techs when I need help because I don’t want to be around him, but he keeps finding reasons to interact with me anyway.

He asked me if I was still in school, and I told him I dropped out. I’m not sure if he knows I’m exactly 17, but I look very young people regularly assume I’m around 14–17 or ask if I’m even old enough to drive.
I don’t want to accuse him of being a predator if he’s just awkward, but the repeated attention is starting to make me uncomfortable at work. Would you consider this inappropriate/harassment, and would you tell a manager at this point?

I’m 17F and recently started working at a tire shop. I’m also the only girl working there. One of my coworkers is in his 20s and has been giving me a lot of attention since I started, and it’s making me uncomfortable.

He asked for my number but I didn’t want him having it so I gave my Instagram instead, keeps coming over to talk to me or waving at me, comments on my Instagram notes in person, and has messaged me outside of work and was even yelling at me when I was closing out and walking to my car asking if I wanted food. He’s asked me to go out with him more than once, but he asks in kind of vague ways where at first I thought he meant hanging out and then he called it a date.

He also keeps calling me “girl,” has patted/tapped my shoulder, and one time a romantic song was playing at work and he said, “this is for you, [my name].”

I haven’t flirted with him or given him any extra attention. I actually try to go to other techs when I need help because I don’t want to be around him, but he keeps finding reasons to interact with me anyway.

He asked me if I was still in school, and I told him I dropped out. I’m not sure if he knows I’m exactly 17, but I look very young people regularly assume I’m around 14–17 or ask if I’m even old enough to drive.
I don’t want to accuse him of being a predator if he’s just awkward, but the repeated attention is starting to make me uncomfortable at work. Would you consider this inappropriate/harassment, and would you tell a manager at this point?

Im 17F, and recently a guy I used to know randomly showed up at my house. I had not spoken to him in over a year, never gave him my address, and didn’t even know he lived near me.

I was bent over getting something from my car in my garage when I suddenly heard someone call my name. I looked up and he was standing in my driveway. My mom also happened to be gone, which is unusual, so the timing made me uncomfortable.
When I asked how he found my house, he initially avoided answering. Later he said he lives about two streets south of me and regularly rides his bike past my street to go to the store for his parents. He said he had repeatedly seen my distinctive car at the house, assumed I lived there, and then confirmed it when he saw me sitting in it that day. He claimed he tried waving, I didn’t notice, and he decided to come into the driveway.

After I gave him my number because I was shocked and kinda scared, he started calling me, including around midnight. During one call/text conversation, he asked, “Where have you been?” and said he thought we were supposed to do something that day, even though we aren’t close. He has also told me I should “turn straight” after I mentioned being lesbian.

There is some additional context that concerns me: he has previously shown up outside his girlfriend’s house at night and thrown rocks at her window.
I told one of my friends everything. My friend immediately said, “Bro, that’s stalking,” called it “almost harassment,” and said I should contact the police if the guy doesn’t stop. And I stated to think differently about it.

I understand that the guy’s explanation about living nearby and recognizing my car could genuinely be true. At the same time, it feels invasive that someone I hadn’t spoken to for over a year had repeatedly noticed my car, figured out where I lived, and then walked onto my driveway without contacting me first.

Does this sound like stalking, the beginning of potentially obsessive behavior, or just someone with extremely poor boundaries? Would it be reasonable to tell him clearly not to come to my house without permission and block him or is it not that serious

I’m 17F, and recently a guy I used to know randomly showed up at my house. I had not spoken to him in over a year, never gave him my address, and didn’t even know he lived near me.

I was bent over getting something from my car in my garage when I suddenly heard someone call my name. I looked up and he was standing in my driveway. My mom also happened to be gone, which is unusual, so the timing made me uncomfortable.
When I asked how he found my house, he initially avoided answering. Later he said he lives about two streets south of me and regularly rides his bike past my street to go to the store for his parents. He said he had repeatedly seen my distinctive car at the house, assumed I lived there, and then confirmed it when he saw me sitting in it that day. He claimed he tried waving, I didn’t notice, and he decided to come into the driveway.

After I gave him my number because I was shocked and kinda scared, he started calling me, including around midnight. During one call/text conversation, he asked, “Where have you been?” and said he thought we were supposed to do something that day, even though we aren’t close. He has also told me I should “turn straight” after I mentioned being lesbian.

There is some additional context that concerns me: he has previously shown up outside his girlfriend’s house at night and thrown rocks at her window.
I told one of my friends everything. My friend immediately said, “Bro, that’s stalking,” called it “almost harassment,” and said I should contact the police if the guy doesn’t stop. And I stated to think differently about it.

I understand that the guy’s explanation about living nearby and recognizing my car could genuinely be true. At the same time, it feels invasive that someone I hadn’t spoken to for over a year had repeatedly noticed my car, figured out where I lived, and then walked onto my driveway without contacting me first.

Does this sound like stalking, the beginning of potentially obsessive behavior, or just someone with extremely poor boundaries? Would it be reasonable to tell him clearly not to come to my house without permission and block him, or am I overreacting?

Don’t even know where to start because I feel like I’m in complete shock. I’m 17F and I’ve identified as a lesbian for years. For the last few years, I’ve been incredibly close with another girl, and she became one of the most important people in my life. We had a really complicated friendship where we’d stop talking and reconnect multiple times, but every time we came back together I felt like maybe there was still a chance we’d eventually end up together. The reason I believed that wasn’t just because I had feelings for her. Over the years she’d said things that made me think there was genuine romantic potential. At one point she said she had a crush on me. She’d talked about maybe dating in the future. She used affectionate nicknames with me. She read yuri, talked about finding female characters. We talked literally everyday and my feelings for her were very very deep.

attractive, constantly complained about men, joked about guys being upset that lesbians wouldn’t date them, and honestly just gave me what I interpreted as very lesbian vibes. Looking back I know none of those things prove someone is a lesbian, but when you combine them with everything else, I genuinely believed there was a real possibility that one day we’d be together.

Then out of nowhere she casually mentioned that she’d been talking to her boyfriend the day before.
I didn’t even know she had one.
What hurt wasn’t just that she had a boyfriend. It was the fact that she’d apparently been referring to him as “a friend” and never once told me she was dating someone. Finding that out made me feel like everything I’d believed for the last couple of years completely shattered in a matter of seconds. I honestly felt like my brain couldn’t process it.
I confronted her about it, and the conversation turned into one of the biggest arguments I’ve ever had. I told her I felt led on, that hiding a boyfriend while knowing how I felt was incredibly hurtful, and that I felt like she’d used me emotionally. She completely denied ever leading me on and basically told me to get over it because “that happened two years ago.” The conversation got worse and worse until we were both insulting each other. Eventually she blocked me.

I was so angry and hurt that I did something I regret. I contacted her from another number just to keep arguing. Looking back now, I know that crossed a line, and I’m honestly ashamed that I let my emotions get that out of control. It wasn’t because I wanted to hurt her physically or anything like that. I was just so desperate for her to understand how much she’d hurt me that I kept trying to force the conversation to continue.

I barely slept last night. I think I got maybe an hour of sleep. I woke up this morning feeling completely weird. Not even just sad. More like I’m in shock. It’s almost like I know what happened intellectually, but emotionally my brain still hasn’t accepted that it’s real. I’ll randomly remember she has a boyfriend and it feels like I’m hearing it for the first time all over again.

The part I wasn’t expecting is how much this has started affecting how I feel about my own sexuality. I don’t suddenly think I’m straight or anything like that, but this whole experience has made me feel almost… ashamed? Confused? Like maybe I can’t trust my own judgment anymore. I spent years genuinely believing this girl might be a lesbian and that there was a chance we’d eventually date. Now I keep wondering if I completely imagined everything, if I was just seeing what I wanted to see, or if there really were mixed signals and we simply experienced the friendship differently. It’s making me question whether I’ll ever be able to tell if another woman is actually interested in me, and that thought is terrifying.

I honestly don’t know how I’m supposed to move on from this. I like I lost one of the most important people in my life overnight, and at the same time it feels like the future I’d imagined with her never actually existed.

Has anyone else been through something like this? Has anyone ever had one person completely shake not only your ability to trust someone else, but your confidence in your own judgment and even your feelings about your sexuality? I feel completely lost right now. And I can’t even fully describe how hurt and disturbed I feel.

Don’t even know where to start because I feel like I’m in complete shock. I’m 17F and I’ve identified as a lesbian for years. For the last few years, I’ve been incredibly close with another girl, and she became one of the most important people in my life. We had a really complicated friendship where we’d stop talking and reconnect multiple times, but every time we came back together I felt like maybe there was still a chance we’d eventually end up together. The reason I believed that wasn’t just because I had feelings for her. Over the years she’d said things that made me think there was genuine romantic potential. At one point she said she had a crush on me. She’d talked about maybe dating in the future. She used affectionate nicknames with me. She read yuri, talked about finding female characters. We talked literally everyday and my feelings for her were very very deep.

attractive, constantly complained about men, joked about guys being upset that lesbians wouldn’t date them, and honestly just gave me what I interpreted as very lesbian vibes. Looking back I know none of those things prove someone is a lesbian, but when you combine them with everything else, I genuinely believed there was a real possibility that one day we’d be together.

Then out of nowhere she casually mentioned that she’d been talking to her boyfriend the day before.
I didn’t even know she had one.
What hurt wasn’t just that she had a boyfriend. It was the fact that she’d apparently been referring to him as “a friend” and never once told me she was dating someone. Finding that out made me feel like everything I’d believed for the last couple of years completely shattered in a matter of seconds. I honestly felt like my brain couldn’t process it.
I confronted her about it, and the conversation turned into one of the biggest arguments I’ve ever had. I told her I felt led on, that hiding a boyfriend while knowing how I felt was incredibly hurtful, and that I felt like she’d used me emotionally. She completely denied ever leading me on and basically told me to get over it because “that happened two years ago.” The conversation got worse and worse until we were both insulting each other. Eventually she blocked me.

I was so angry and hurt that I did something I regret. I contacted her from another number just to keep arguing. Looking back now, I know that crossed a line, and I’m honestly ashamed that I let my emotions get that out of control. It wasn’t because I wanted to hurt her physically or anything like that. I was just so desperate for her to understand how much she’d hurt me that I kept trying to force the conversation to continue.

I barely slept last night. I think I got maybe an hour of sleep. I woke up this morning feeling completely weird. Not even just sad. More like I’m in shock. It’s almost like I know what happened intellectually, but emotionally my brain still hasn’t accepted that it’s real. I’ll randomly remember she has a boyfriend and it feels like I’m hearing it for the first time all over again.

The part I wasn’t expecting is how much this has started affecting how I feel about my own sexuality. I don’t suddenly think I’m straight or anything like that, but this whole experience has made me feel almost… ashamed? Confused? Like maybe I can’t trust my own judgment anymore. I spent years genuinely believing this girl might be a lesbian and that there was a chance we’d eventually date. Now I keep wondering if I completely imagined everything, if I was just seeing what I wanted to see, or if there really were mixed signals and we simply experienced the friendship differently. It’s making me question whether I’ll ever be able to tell if another woman is actually interested in me, and that thought is terrifying.

I honestly don’t know how I’m supposed to move on from this. I like I lost one of the most important people in my life overnight, and at the same time it feels like the future I’d imagined with her never actually existed.

Has anyone else been through something like this? Has anyone ever had one person completely shake not only your ability to trust someone else, but your confidence in your own judgment and even your feelings about your sexuality? I feel completely lost right now. And I can’t even fully describe how hurt and disturbed I feel.

Don’t even know where to start because I feel like I’m in complete shock. I’m 17F and I’ve identified as a lesbian for years. For the last few years, I’ve been incredibly close with another girl, and she became one of the most important people in my life. We had a really complicated friendship where we’d stop talking and reconnect multiple times, but every time we came back together I felt like maybe there was still a chance we’d eventually end up together. The reason I believed that wasn’t just because I had feelings for her. Over the years she’d said things that made me think there was genuine romantic potential. At one point she said she had a crush on me. She’d talked about maybe dating in the future. She used affectionate nicknames with me. She read yuri, talked about finding female characters. We talked literally everyday and my feelings for her were very very deep.

attractive, constantly complained about men, joked about guys being upset that lesbians wouldn’t date them, and honestly just gave me what I interpreted as very lesbian vibes. Looking back I know none of those things prove someone is a lesbian, but when you combine them with everything else, I genuinely believed there was a real possibility that one day we’d be together.

Then out of nowhere she casually mentioned that she’d been talking to her boyfriend the day before.
I didn’t even know she had one.
What hurt wasn’t just that she had a boyfriend. It was the fact that she’d apparently been referring to him as “a friend” and never once told me she was dating someone. Finding that out made me feel like everything I’d believed for the last couple of years completely shattered in a matter of seconds. I honestly felt like my brain couldn’t process it.
I confronted her about it, and the conversation turned into one of the biggest arguments I’ve ever had. I told her I felt led on, that hiding a boyfriend while knowing how I felt was incredibly hurtful, and that I felt like she’d used me emotionally. She completely denied ever leading me on and basically told me to get over it because “that happened two years ago.” The conversation got worse and worse until we were both insulting each other. Eventually she blocked me.

I was so angry and hurt that I did something I regret. I contacted her from another number just to keep arguing. Looking back now, I know that crossed a line, and I’m honestly ashamed that I let my emotions get that out of control. It wasn’t because I wanted to hurt her physically or anything like that. I was just so desperate for her to understand how much she’d hurt me that I kept trying to force the conversation to continue.

I barely slept last night. I think I got maybe an hour of sleep. I woke up this morning feeling completely weird. Not even just sad. More like I’m in shock. It’s almost like I know what happened intellectually, but emotionally my brain still hasn’t accepted that it’s real. I’ll randomly remember she has a boyfriend and it feels like I’m hearing it for the first time all over again.

The part I wasn’t expecting is how much this has started affecting how I feel about my own sexuality. I don’t suddenly think I’m straight or anything like that, but this whole experience has made me feel almost… ashamed? Confused? Like maybe I can’t trust my own judgment anymore. I spent years genuinely believing this girl might be a lesbian and that there was a chance we’d eventually date. Now I keep wondering if I completely imagined everything, if I was just seeing what I wanted to see, or if there really were mixed signals and we simply experienced the friendship differently. It’s making me question whether I’ll ever be able to tell if another woman is actually interested in me, and that thought is terrifying.

I honestly don’t know how I’m supposed to move on from this. I like I lost one of the most important people in my life overnight, and at the same time it feels like the future I’d imagined with her never actually existed.

Has anyone else been through something like this? Has anyone ever had one person completely shake not only your ability to trust someone else, but your confidence in your own judgment and even your feelings about your sexuality? I feel completely lost right now. And I can’t even fully describe how hurt and disturbed I feel.

I’m 17f and I feel like my family has decided I’m the “bad” or “problem” child. They constantly call me lazy, disobedient, manipulative, and say I fake everything. The confusing part is that when I ask what I’m specifically doing wrong, they just say “everything.” I’ve even offered to write down exactly what they want me to change so I can work on it, but they said that was an act and another attempt to manipulate them.

Recently, my mom saw a private text I sent my dad. I had said I didn’t understand what some of the child-support money was being spent on, but that I didn’t want to confront her because I didn’t want an argument. My mom had an extreme reaction screaming, crying, and hyperventilating and then involved the rest of my family. After that, they all stood around criticizing me and saying it was a shame how I was turning out, especially because I’m “so beautiful” and apparently don’t want to change.

My grandmother also grabbed the wrist where I have self-harm scars, slapped it, and said she was disappointed in me. Instead of asking why I was struggling or whether I was safe, I felt punished and humiliated for already being in pain.
Now my family says they will no longer help me with gas, car repairs, or anything connected to my car. I earn around $250 every two weeks, and I’m expected to pay my mom $100 every month for insurance while also covering gas, oil, maintenance, and repairs myself. I understand that families don’t have to pay for everything, but it feels like financial support is constantly being taken away as punishment rather than discussed as a normal boundary.

My extended family usually sides with my mom. They say I don’t deserve graduation gifts or a graduation trip because I will have “barely graduated.” My sister isn’t treated this way, and I constantly feel like I’m being compared to her or treated as though everything wrong in the family is my fault.

There has also been physical behavior in the past, including my mom choking me more than once. She becomes extremely upset when I speak privately to my dad, and I feel like I’m not allowed to honestly tell him what is happening at home.
I know I’m not perfect. I’ve struggled with school, depression, motivation, and following through on things. But I genuinely don’t understand how I’m supposed to improve when nobody will name a specific behavior and every attempt I make is dismissed as manipulation. The constant criticism has destroyed my self-esteem and has made me feel suicidal.

Am I failing to recognize something I’m doing, or does this sound like scapegoating and emotional abuse?

I just really need to vent because I’m feeling incredibly hurt and lonely right now, and I don't have anyone else to talk to.

My mom recently bought my sister an Xbox. I politely asked her if I could get a Switch 2 if I saved up and split the cost 50/50 with her. She straight-up told me "no" because I have clinical depression and "don't deserve" one. On top of that, I’m not even allowed to play on the Xbox she got for my sister.
When I tried to ask her about it, she just told me to get away from the Xbox like I was going to do something bad. It hurts so much to be treated with suspicion and rejected just for trying to have a normal conversation. My sister is consistently treated better than me she’ll take her places constantly without telling me and says it’s cuz she doesn’t want to be around me.

It feels like my sister is constantly treated so much better, while I am treated like absolute trash. On top of being left out, my mom constantly verbally abuses me, and it is wearing me down to nothing.
Because of all this, I can't play games with friends like my sister can. In fact, I don't really have any close friends to talk to at all right now. I feel completely isolated, and it feels like my mental health is being used as a punishment. It's making me feel like nobody cares about me, and carrying all of this stress alone is getting really heavy. My mom constantly makes me feel like nothing and isolated I also don’t have many friends to talk to and contemplate suicide everyday cuz I feel so uncalled she’s also physically abused me many times in the past by choking me and such and nobody believed me, she also bought it with child support money

I need advice and don’t know if I’m in the wrong. I’m 17F and honestly looking for outside perspectives because this has completely messed with my head. I had a friend from school who had become my closest friend over the last few months. We weren’t texting every day or anything, but we’d hung out one-on-one multiple times, I’d drive him places a lot, and we’d started opening up to each other more. He was pretty much the last friend I had left at school besides one other person, and I’ve lost a lot of friendships over the years, so this has hit me really hard. The last time we hung out we both got really vulnerable. He shared a lot of deeply personal things about his life and relationship, and I shared personal things too, which is rare for me because I don’t usually open up. Throughout our friendship, he was actually the one who brought up sexual topics pretty frequently, often more than I did. He would tell me about sexual experiences with his girlfriend, make sexual jokes, and ask me sexual questions, so conversations like that weren’t unusual between us and he was usually the one introducing those topics. I’m also a lesbian and have never had any romantic or sexual interest in him, which both he and his girlfriend knew. At one point I made a sexual joke involving my crush, basically saying I was sitting on a bed with her and joking that I was trying to initiate something. As far as I remember he laughed, added to the joke, and even suggested music to “use,” so he didn’t seem uncomfortable at all in the moment. That same day he kept trying to go through my Reddit and TikTok searches even after I repeatedly told him I didn’t want him to. He saw one of my TikTok searches that said “lesbian lonely depressed,” which was embarrassing, and I ended up deleting Reddit while we were hanging out because he kept trying to look through it and I didn’t want him seeing my searches. I honestly don’t think there was anything shocking on there, but I guess I can’t know exactly what he saw. After that hangout I noticed he slowly started replying less and reacting to my posts less, but he still talked to me for another couple of weeks. Then out of nowhere he blocked me on everything, and his girlfriend blocked me too. A mutual friend asked him why, and all he would tell her was that I said “something inappropriate about my crush,” but he refuses to tell either of us what I actually said. His girlfriend is very protective of him and has never really liked him having female friends, so I did wonder if she had anything to do with it, especially because she had recently found out she was moving away around the time all of this happened. At the same time, I’m hesitant to blame her because, from what I know, he hasn’t always done what she wanted for example, she previously wanted him to stop talking to another female friend of mine, and he stayed friends with her anyway. So I genuinely don’t know if she had any influence or if this was completely his own decision. I sent him a genuine apology saying that if I crossed a boundary I wanted to know what I did so I could learn from it, but I honestly don’t remember saying anything I’d consider outrageous, and I feel like if I had said something truly awful I’d remember it. I’m not looking for people to tell me he’s wrong or that I’m right. I genuinely want outside opinions on what the most likely explanation is because I feel like I’m missing something. I’m also really struggling with the fact that he was basically my last close friend at school. I already have a history of losing friendships, and now I feel incredibly isolated and honestly don’t even know how I’m supposed to cope with losing the last person I felt close to there. I mostly just wish he’d tell me what I did, if anything, so I could understand what happened.

I’m 17F, still in high school, have a job, and drive. Lately I’ve been really depressed because I lost one of my closest friends unexpectedly, and it’s affected me more than I thought it would. I’ve been struggling to find motivation to do basic things, although I still try. I was depressed before but that was rlly the nail in the coffin.

Yesterday I was trying to clean my room. I got about halfway done but I was exhausted and ended up laying down. I also accidentally left some leftover food downstairs on the counter.

My mom came downstairs, saw the leftovers, and immediately started yelling at me. She said she was taking my phone. I asked what I did wrong because I genuinely didn’t understand why the reaction was so extreme.

Instead of explaining, she called my grandparents while I was standing there crying.
She started telling them that I’m “dangerous,” “evil,” and that I’m trying to get the police called on her. She also brought up that I have a second rabbit (which she already knew about) and said she was going to force me to move in with my grandparents.
For context, she’s actually kicked me out to live with my grandparents before. It only lasted a day, but it was honestly one of the most traumatic things that’s happened to me. So every time she threatens to send me back there, it terrifies me.

While she was on the phone, she kept telling my grandparents terrible things about me. She said I lied to child protective services because I hated her, even though I never reported her. One of my friends reported concerns about how I was being treated after seeing what was happening.
My grandparents always believe her. They tell me I “never change” and agree with whatever she says. I was literally crying and asking, “What did I do wrong?” and instead of
answering, I was being called evil. She kept my phone all night.

I ended up self-harming because I felt completely overwhelmed and didn’t know how to cope.
Today, after I got home from work, she saw the cuts. Instead of asking if I was okay or why I did it, she took pictures of them and said she was going to show my grandparents. She also said that now she can take me to a psychiatric crisis center whenever she wants because she has “proof.” Then she told me she’s still taking my phone away every night at 10 p.m.

I tried explaining that being able to talk to my friends is one of the few things helping my mental health right now, especially after everything that’s happened recently. She told me she didn’t care and that she was still taking it.

This isn’t an isolated incident either.
She regularly calls me names during arguments, tells me I’m manipulative or evil, tells my grandparents negative things about me, and they almost always side with her without asking my side. She also takes my phone over what feels like very small things, even though I’m almost an adult, have a job, and have responsibilities.

I’m honestly starting to question my own reality because everyone in my family tells me I’m the problem.
Is this emotional abuse, or is this normal parenting and I’m just too sensitive? She has choked and hit me before but told any parent dealing with me would do these things, I don’t do drugs or sleep around or do anything fun I js go to work and try to survive this

I’m 17F,still in high school, have a job, and drive. Lately I’ve been really depressed because I lost one of my closest friends unexpectedly, and it’s affected me more than I thought it would. I’ve been struggling to find motivation to do basic things, although I still try. I was depressed before but that was rlly the nail in the coffin.

Yesterday I was trying to clean my room. I got about halfway done but I was exhausted and ended up laying down. I also accidentally left some leftover food downstairs on the counter.

My mom came downstairs, saw the leftovers, and immediately started yelling at me. She said she was taking my phone. I asked what I did wrong because I genuinely didn’t understand why the reaction was so extreme.

Instead of explaining, she called my grandparents while I was standing there crying.
She started telling them that I’m “dangerous,” “evil,” and that I’m trying to get the police called on her. She also brought up that I have a second rabbit (which she already knew about) and said she was going to force me to move in with my grandparents.
For context, she’s actually kicked me out to live with my grandparents before. It only lasted a day, but it was honestly one of the most traumatic things that’s happened to me. So every time she threatens to send me back there, it terrifies me.

While she was on the phone, she kept telling my grandparents terrible things about me. She said I lied to child protective services because I hated her, even though I never reported her. One of my friends reported concerns about how I was being treated after seeing what was happening.
My grandparents always believe her. They tell me I “never change” and agree with whatever she says. I was literally crying and asking, “What did I do wrong?” and instead of
answering, I was being called evil. She kept my phone all night.

I ended up self-harming because I felt completely overwhelmed and didn’t know how to cope.
Today, after I got home from work, she saw the cuts. Instead of asking if I was okay or why I did it, she took pictures of them and said she was going to show my grandparents. She also said that now she can take me to a psychiatric crisis center whenever she wants because she has “proof.” Then she told me she’s still taking my phone away every night at 10 p.m.

I tried explaining that being able to talk to my friends is one of the few things helping my mental health right now, especially after everything that’s happened recently. She told me she didn’t care and that she was still taking it.

This isn’t an isolated incident either.
She regularly calls me names during arguments, tells me I’m manipulative or evil, tells my grandparents negative things about me, and they almost always side with her without asking my side. She also takes my phone over what feels like very small things, even though I’m almost an adult, have a job, and have responsibilities.

I’m honestly starting to question my own reality because everyone in my family tells me I’m the problem.
Is this emotional abuse, or is this normal parenting and I’m just too sensitive? She has choked and hit me before but told any parent dealing with me would do these things, I don’t do drugs or sleep around or do anything fun I js go to work and try to survive this