u/Tricky-Muffin7102

I'm 21 and I've been seeing my therapist for about a decade. Today was a pretty heavy appointment, because I made it focus specifically on my current dilemma: stick with a degree I despise to appeal my family or move out and try studying something I love.

I don't remember the specifics, but I remember oddly clearly saying "I don't know if my indeciciveness is from my mental health issues or if I'm just being a 20 years something."

And then she told me something along the lines of "The thing is, it's super normal for 20 years olds to not know anything. It's the prime time for discovery of the self, you're meant to explore and solidify who you are. But because finances are so tough right now, everything cost too much and parents can't support the full extend of their child anymore, people are now cut back into developping how they're meant to be, with enough space to be wrong. People can't afford risks anymore."

It hit me so hard… I feel like I would have so much more confidence if I could just… make mistakes. I wish I wasn't so scared of failure because of money.

And it makes me so sad for the common folk. What if we could just switch jobs and study all the things we are interested in, and all would end up okay?

I wish we could afford risks.

TLDR: I (22) have to give an answer tomorrow whether I move back with my old roommates and start a new degree or if I stay at my parents and finish my current "degree". Thought about it for 3 months straight and still get paralysed over choosing one or the other.

Can afford it, but deeply scared of failure as it's not my first time moving out just to move back in my parents'.

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I'm 22 and my life in the last years has been… Frankly, abysmal.

I initially moved out at 17 in student dorms because I had one life planned out: get my graphic designs degree, get a job, succeed at life.

But then I started getting sick… I got physical issues foreshadowing more disabilities to come. If got to the point that my therapist and doctors forced me to get off school.

So, I moved back to my parents and I found a job that I loved and it paid really well. Worked there for a year but the bosses would bully me harshly. I tried various studies on the side which all failed due to disablities + bullying = depression burnout. I kept at my job until the bullying got unbearable.

Between all this, I tried moving out, but got further disabled. I moved back to my parents once more, left my job and went to study my current certificate. It's just a 1 year degree where I study computers to be a customer supporter. However, it's really pathetic. It's poorly organised: we don't have the right equipment to learn, the teachers are not teaching, most students are absent and, frankly, they don't miss much, etc.

I was looking for other studies to try and got accepted in university in languages. At the same time, my old roomates offered me to go back to them for the same rent. They want me to give them an answer tomorrow. I've been thinking for 3 months straight and losing sleep over it, and I still get decision paralysis over it.

Technically I can afford it with my current savings, it's just… I'm scared. I'm scared of failing again like I did so many times, I'm scared I'll unlock a new disability like it happened every time I moved out, I'm scared I'll be unhappy out too. My parents and I argued because they think I can't and shouldn't go to university just to fail again, that I can't survive by myself.

I just… Please someone reassure me that it's possible, at least sometime in the next years…

TLDR: 21 with a pretty disabling autism disorder.

• Stay at my parents, on the condition that I do university part-time while keeping studying the mind-numbing boring 1 year degree. No rent and food is provided.
• Move out to get some freedom at the cost of rent, groceries, general human upkeeping that took me out last time when I developped an illness on top of it all.

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I'm 21 and I really really struggle with my autism. The kind where I have developped Persistant Depression comorbidly to it, regularly burning out and never finishing a diploma type of autism.

I was accepted into a university to study languages for translation and I'm thrilled for it. However, it's far away (takes me 2h just to get there, so 4h of transport every day). An old roommate suggested that I moved back with them, and the rent is low enough that I wouldn't struggle for at least the first two years.

I put off telling my parents (I had moved back with them when doctors put me out of school due to health issues) because they've been, quite frankly, telling me I'm a loser. I'm currently doing basically a 1 year degree in computer support to appeal to them. It is nightmarish in how boring it is (and so disorganized), hence why I wanted to switch to university in languages.

So now I keep getting everyone's opinions, friends and family, regarding if I should:

• Stay at my parents, but their condition is that I do university part-time while keeping studying the 1 year degree. No rent and food is provided.
• Move out to get some freedom at the cost of rent, groceries, general human upkeeping.

I've been overthinking this for months now and I can't seem to make up my mind. If I wasn't so scared of burning out, I'd definitely move out, but it seems so daunting when an illness could take me out last time. :(

I (21M) don't know why. I was brushing this wig for a cosplay outside and all the ends ended up frizzled up because of my brushing.

I took the wig, went inside and started SCREAMING. My parents started yelling at me to shut up and I lost it. Locked myself in my room and starting throwing things around, broke my comb in half, screamed in pillows. Started punching myself until I fell to the ground, slapped myself, punched my bed. It was explosive and I had no control.

I knew I had anger in me. It's why I've been to therapy for trauma and autism for more than a decade. I don't know why NOW I burst up.

I know I'm mentally ill (Persistent Depression Disorder but I got the nice flavor of treatment resistant so I can't be medicated) but like… why now? I've been holding it in and controlling my autism meltdowns for years now.

Anyways I lowkey hope my parents kick me out for this, I destroyed their property and all.

Flair for mention of sexual assault and r*pe, no graphic description.

TLDR: Started screaming and having a really bad trauma response when my gynecologist inserted a tool in my vagina, but I feel bad about it because I never was r*ped.

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So I'm 21 and had an IUD installed a little more than a year ago. All was good, I screamed the normal amount (seriously, why the F*CK is it so painful??) but we told me a few months ago that it was the wrong one due to conditions I have, so I had an appointment to remove it today and get another type of IUD.

So today, I go in the room, get on the table. The *moment* the gynecologist inserts her tooks in my vagina, I start BAWLING.

Screaming, shaking, I cry my eyes out. Downright "hysterical". I keep yelling that I can't back down and that she should ignore me. My gynecologist, thankfully, stops immediately and waits that I calm down.

I get off the table and she asks me if I was ever r*ped before… and I say no.

It's so weird. I *never* reacted like this, ever. Sure, I got assaulted, multiple times even, but I never was raped. I don't understand. No one penetrated me or touched me down there. Why did I react so strongly?

I feel so guilty… I would understand anyone who was r*ped to react like this, or assaulted more heavily than I ever was. I just… I'd like to say that I can go to therapy to work on trauma, what is there to work on when nothing is going on?

What the hell was wrong with me today?

I'm 21M, and the youngest sibling of 4. I used to be the spoiled child. Always getting incredible grades, on track to get my graduate job before any of my siblings, always doing something interesting, etc.

Well, I always was depressed, but it got significantly worse in the last 5 years. I've become the clown of the family. I kept abandonning studies, getting low-grade jobs, discovering "embarassing" parts of me that reflect "badly" on my parents. (Being queer and developping handicapping illnesses.)

I was the first one to get out of the house at 16 when I tried studying in another city. I got my first apartment at 18. And yet I got to be the disappointment when I had to beg my way back due to develippingmmy handicaps.

Parents now tell me I'm awful, a lazy piece of shit, a chronic quitter. They didn't even want to call the ambulance when I begged for it when I had a paralysis episode. And mother didn't even want to drive me to the ER when I attempted suicide and services called her to tell her I needed to be interned.

I can never get out of here and I'd rather die.

18+ flair due to suicidal ideation and suicide attempt mention.

TLDR: Have had depression for 10+ years, got told I have dysthymia, but can't try more extreme treatment at the moment. How do I handle dysthymia?

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About a week ago, I (21M) made a suicide attempt. One of numerous, really. But, I ended up calling three different crisis lines, and they all encouraged me to go to the ER so a psychiatrist could help me.

Long story short, I went last Monday, and the psychiatrist at the ER told me I definitely sounded like I had dysthymia… and then told me she couldn't do anything about it because it's incurable. She did contact my nurse (basically my GP) to examine other types of anti-depressants, but she really insisted that it's incurable and I won't get better unless I smile or take some cold showers or something.

So now I'm looking for some treatments for dysthymia. I saw ECT, TMS and psilocybin pop-up. However, I can't get those treatments due to other circumstances (too costly; not available in my region; too risky) so like…

What am I supposed to do?

I've seen my therapist for 10+ years (been depressed and suicidal since a little longer) and other ones as well, tried different therapy methods, I do exercise everyday, I sleep well, my vitamins and hormones and other body issues are alright or managed, I socialise… and yet I still attempt suicide.

Dysthymia is ruining my life and I don't know what to do to manage the symptoms.

Flair for mental health issues mention.

TLDR: Mother refuses to get me to the hospital to see a psychiatrist due to mental health issues. She sends me cheesy quotes about "picking myself up" instead. I'm stuck with this situation.

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So I (21M) am in an embarassing situation. I attempted to end it all two days ago. I felt like it again yesterday, so I called three different emergency lines. They had all told me to go to the ER so I could get a psychiatrist to see me, even if it means waiting 12h at the ER and getting interned at the hospital.

Embarassingly, I can't drive due to health issues, and cabs are crazy expensive in my part of Canada. So, I had to tell my mother about the situation… and she refused.

The services called her to convince her, and she refused persistently.

So here I am, stuck in my room, wondering how the hell I am going to keep living my life like nothing is wrong.

My mother keeps telling me to do tasks and sends me cheesy quotes about "picking yourself up". She scolded me for skipping school to call the hotliens and considering going to the hospital. I've told her to stop and she isn't. I know she just wants to help me, but right now I just want to be alone if I can't see a psychiatrist.

How do I keep my peace when my mother triggers my depression?

I'm 21M. I've had depression with suicidal ideation for 10+ years.

I've seen a therapist regularly throughout that time, and many *many* other ones throughout those years. I was on a bunch of medications, have had physical checkups and we solved some physical problems too. I have been trying to go bsck to school yet I fail over and over again.

Yesterday, I had a really bad suicidal ideation episode. I called three different help ressources and all told me I need to be at the hospital ASAP to be referred to a psychiatrist, which I never tried before. I told my mother I need to go, even if it's 12h waiting in the ER.

She refused.

All services called her to try to persuade her, and she refuses persistently.

I can't get a cab or an ambulance due to money issues, and I can't legally drive due to health issues.

I have quite literally nowhere to go and I'm so scared that if it keeps up, I'll abandon school again and then get kicked-out as my parents threathened to if I quit again.

Flair is for depression and suicidal mention.

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I'm 21M and I'm a serial quitter. I've currently started my fourth degree, because I kept abandoning the three previous ones. I'd either develop suicidal thoughts, attempt and then get put off school, or develop severe health issues due to such suicidal thoughts.

Yesterday, it happened yet again. I've had severe suicidal thoughts. I call three different crisis lines, which all told me to get a psychiatrist and get interned, even if I have to wait 12h at the ER for it. I can't drive legally (severe sleep issues), nor can I call a cab (lack of money), so I had to tell my mother about it.

She refused and said I was just quitting when it's hard again. The services called her to convince her and she refused too.

So here I am, dreading how I'll quit again school. I can't let this happen again. I NEED my degree so I can get out of this shithole.

I'm treatment resistant so it's not like I can solve it with meds. I need to get disciplined.

Please advice me, I'd really appreciate it if someone could tell me to get my shit together, stop my bad behaviour and just do the goddamn degree.

I'm 21M. I've had depression with suicidal ideation for 10+ years.

I've seen a therapist regularly throughout that time, and many *many* other ones throughout those years. I was on a bunch of medications, have had physical checkups and we solved some physical problems too. I have been trying to go bsck to school yet I fail over and over again.

Today, I had a really bad suicidal ideation episode. I called three different help ressources and all told me I need to be at the hospital ASAP to be referred to a psychiatrist, which I never tried before. I told my mother I need to go, even if it's 12h waiting in the ER.

She refused.

All services called her to try to persuade her, and she refuses persistently.

I can't get a cab or an ambulance due to money issues, and I can't legally drive due to health issues.

I have quite literally nowhere to go and I'm so scared that if it keeps up, I'll abandon school again and then get kicked-out as my parents threathened to if I quit again.

HELP

TLDR: Therapist told me the high school teacher who groomed me was "just treating me as his pupil", even when I told him it was a traumatizing experience that heavily impacted me. I'm tired of having to justify my trauma.

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I was in therapy for 10+ years with my previous therapist, whom I can't see as frequently anymore due to complications in her life. So, I sought other therapists to fill in the weeks I don't see her.

I had to "shop" therapists a lot because I kept getting men who would diminish my trauma when I'd tell them about a high school teacher who made me highly uncomfortable.

The one I'm currently seeing is someone I thought wouldn't be that way. I told him about that trauma, explained that, even though I wasn't raped, I still was getting groomed and it impacted me. He dismissed it by telling me that the teacher just was really into seeing me as a prodigy, as his pupil.

I'm sooooo done with therapists who don't take me seriously when I say THIS IS TRAUMA even if I wasn't raped! Urgh. :/

I started a degree last week. I started getting friendly with my desk neighbour.

Today was a particularly boring day where the teacher was all over the place. My desk neighbour told me he had a hard time going through the lecture due to his ADHD. So, I replied that me too, though it's rather because of my autism.

He then said "oh, you don't look autistic".

Which confused me because just a few minutes ago, he told me he thought I was angry due to my face and body language when it's just autism doing its thing. I told him so and he doubled down.

I feel… offended? I don't know why exactly though. I understand he's talking about a stereotype and I don't fit it (because I'm verbal or whatever).

I guess maybe I feel like it's dimissing my struggles? I'm on my fourth degree because I keep failing them due to autism and health issues that pop up.

TLDR: I made my first sculpture inspired by my passion for Inuktitut and my favorite Inuk singer and never expected to have it exposed, but my professor went ahead and exposed it. People are not using correct terms to describe the Inuit influence, making the whole thing extremely awkward.

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I'm a beginner in clay sculpting. I'm also passionate about Inuktitut language, so I thought I'd do my first sculpture inspired by the Inuit culture and my favorite Inuk singer, Elisapie. However, I'm not Inuk. I live in a small North American village where everyone is pasty white.

While I was doing my sculpture, I was talking about my passion and stuff I was learning about the culture and language. I never expected to have the sculpture exposed, because I'm just a beginner while all other participants a intermediates/experts.

Well, my professor is exposing my sculpture and it brought a lot of racism. My professor isn't using accurate terms when describing it, and people are using slurs to describe the character based on my favorite Inuk singer.

I never intended the sculpture to be exposed since I very much know it'd bring racism (and/or be read as cultural appropriation since I'm not Inuk), and now I must bathe in my shame until the exposition is over.

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TLDR: I made my first sculpture inspired by my passion for Inuktitut and my favorite Inuk singer and never expected to have it exposed, but my professor went ahead and exposed it. People are not using correct terms to describe the Inuit influence, making the whole thing extremely awkward.