u/Upbeat-Dinner-5162

Salam, I’m a stay-at-home mom and quite happy. I have a toddler at home and people keep asking me when I will go back to work. Honestly, I don’t really want to.

But people (Muslims & non-Muslims) keep saying that women should be strong and independent. And that they shouldn’t rely on their husband. But doesn’t that make them a kaffir because they are rejecting what the Quran says.

Being a feminist doesnt automatically make you a kaffir.

If ANYBODY believes that men are NOT protectors or providers of women, then they kufr because it says in Quran:

Surah Nisa “Men are the caretakers of women, as men have been provisioned by Allah over women and tasked with supporting them financially.”

Unfortunately, plenty of feminist believe that men are not providers and protectors of women. These people are committing kufr. These people say a woman shouldn’t ask her husband for financial expenses as women should be get the most highest paying jobs as we are “strong and independent”. That is contradictory to what Allah says. Allah put the financial burden on men, not women.

However, some feminist do believe that men are the providers and protectors of women. But they just stand up for basic rights of women like being able to drive, stand up against domestic violence, able to have a bank account, etc. This type of feminism is permissible of course.

Hey guys,

My husband and I are separated. It was his idea and honestly, I begged him not to do this as we have a toddler.

He is known to have anger issues but I wanted to be with him because I want my daughter to experience love for both parents. Even he has admitted and says “the only time I turn into a good person is during Ramadan” (we are Muslims).

We have been separated for a little over 2 months now. But we meet almost weekly as we so coparent. She goes to his house to spend time with him like 1-2 days a week.

My husband has a foot fetish and he told me this on our wedding night. Which I didn’t really take too seriously as I have heard that many men are into it. However, I went through his phone just out of curiosity and saw that he had pics of women’s feet saved on his phone, which I told him to delete. When he used to come home from work, the first thing he used to do is look at my feet

Whenever we meet now, he always gets a quick glimpse at my feet and acts like I don’t even notice. Today, I was waiting for him in my car and he opened the door and he ducked down to look at my feet and then acted normal as if nothing happened.. He took our baby and left.

Why is he doing this when he doesn’t want to live with me ?

Hey guys,

My husband and I are separated. It was his idea and honestly, I begged him not to do this as we have a toddler.

He is known to have anger issues but I wanted to be with him because I want my daughter to experience love for both parents. Even he has admitted and says “the only time I turn into a good person is during Ramadan” (we are Muslims).

We have been separated for a little over 2 months now. But we meet almost weekly as we so coparent. She goes to his house to spend time with him like 1-2 days a week.

My husband has a foot fetish and he told me this on our wedding night. Which I didn’t really take too seriously as I have heard that many men are into it. However, I went through his phone just out of curiosity and saw that he had pics of women’s feet saved on his phone, which I told him to delete. When he used to come home from work, the first thing he used to do is look at my feet

Whenever we meet now, he always gets a quick glimpse at my feet and acts like I don’t even notice. Today, I was waiting for him in my car and he opened the door and he ducked down to look at my feet and then acted normal as if nothing happened.. He took our baby and left.

Why is he doing this when he doesn’t want to live with me ?

Salam,

These days, I see many men and women arguing that men are not protectors and providers of women. And that woman should go out there and get the highest college degrees, and the best professions. And that men are not obligated to protect and provide for his wife. They also say that a woman should go 50-50 with her husband when it comes to finances.

However, in the Quran, it directly, says that men are the providers and protectors of women. If somebody goes against this, are they not Muslim anymore? Because they are going against what Allah says. Are they committing kuffr?

Hey guys,

I know this is a thing all around the world. But it seems waaaay too prevalent in desi culture.

From what I’ve seen, desi moms have an attachment to their sons. So they try to dictate who their sons marry. In the traditional rishta process, I’ve even seen moms preventing their 40 year sons from finding a wife because “no woman is good enough for him”.

Now let’s move onto dads. They definitely take it to a whole new level. Dads from all racial backgrounds are protective about their daughters but I feel like desi dads are a little extreme. I’ve seen dads constantly rejecting suitors for minor reasons because nobody is good enough for his “little princess”. Not only that, these dads don’t let their daughters talk or even look at men. They reject suitors who are not doctors or engineers, not tall enough, not wealthy enough or don’t have a certain degree.

Because of this super controlling behavior of desi parents, I see so many lonely singles in their late 30s/40s who want to get married, but just don’t have the opportunity. These controlling parents are ruining their children’s lives. Thoughts ?

Hey guys,

I know this is a thing all around the world. But it seems waaaay too prevalent in desi culture.

From what I’ve seen, desi moms have an attachment to their sons. So they try to dictate who their sons marry. In the traditional rishta process, I’ve even seen moms preventing their 40 year sons from finding a wife because “no woman is good enough for him”.

Now let’s move onto dads. They definitely take it to a whole new level. Dads from all racial backgrounds are protective about their daughters but I feel like desi dads are a little extreme. I’ve seen dads constantly rejecting suitors for minor reasons because nobody is good enough for his “little princess”. Not only that, these dads don’t let their daughters talk or even look at men. They reject suitors who are not doctors or engineers, not tall enough, not wealthy enough or don’t have a certain degree.

Because of this super controlling behavior of desi parents, I see so many lonely singles in their late 30s/40s who want to get married, but just don’t have the opportunity. These controlling parents are ruining their children’s lives. Thoughts ?

What are the best days of the week to run a yard sale?

During the Columbian exchange, the “old world” was introduced to tomatoes, chilis, corn, potatoes and etc. While the “new world” was introduced to wheat, lemons, black pepper, cilantro, mangoes, etc. Nowadays tomatoes are very widely used even in the old world countries like India and Italy.

Did Australia have something similar to this when it was discovered ?

Ok so I never really had interest in history class when I was in school.

I just recently learned that thousands of years ago, Greeks and Roman’s used to travel to India for black pepper because that’s where it’s native to. Interestingly, I always thought salt and black pepper are seasonings white people use to season their food.

And the “Desi spice” is red chilli. Which I learned is actually native to South America and Mexico. I was shocked to learn that red chilli powder has just recently been incorporated in our cuisine. Did anybody else think like this? I can’t be the only one 😭.

ETHIOPIAN- People say Ethiopian food is pretty similar to north Indian. I’ve never had it before so I can’t say anything about that.

MEXICAN food is spicy. Mexican and Indian cuisine use very similar ingredients. Such as chilies, cumin, lemons, coriander, tomatoes, tamarind, mangoes, etc.

Roti is similar to tortillas.

Keema ka paratha is similar to quesadillas.

Nihari tastes similar to beef birrias.

Chutney is similar to salsa.

Samosa is similar to empanadas.

Shahi tukra tastes similar to tres leche.

MIDDLE EASTERN dishes are a little similar like kabsa is similar to biryani. Luqmat is similar to gulab jamun. Kebabs, korma, naans, etc have middle eastern origin.

Which of these 3 do you think is most similar to Indian cuisine?

As a top of course

ETHIOPIAN- People say Ethiopian food is pretty similar to Indian. I’ve never had it before so I can’t say anything about that.

MEXICAN food is spicy. Mexican and Indian cuisine use very similar ingredients. Such as chilies, cumin, lemons, coriander, tomatoes, tamarind, mangoes, etc.

Roti is similar to tortillas.

Keema ka paratha is similar to quesadillas.

Nihari tastes similar to beef birrias.

Chutney is similar to salsa.

Samosa is similar to empanadas.

Shahi tukra tastes similar to tres leche.

MIDDLE EASTERN dishes are a little similar like kabsa is similar to biryani. Luqmat is similar to gulab jamun. Kebabs, korma, naans, etc have middle eastern origin.

Which of these 3 do you think is most similar to Indian cuisine?

Roti is similar to tortillas.

Keema ka paratha is similar to quesadillas.

Nihari tastes similar to beef birrias.

Chutney is similar to salsa.

Samosa is similar to empanadas.

Shahi tukra tastes similar to tres leche.

We also use similar ingredients like cilantro, chilis, lemons, tamarind, tomatoes, cumin, mangoes, etc. Both love spicy food lol

Salam,

There is an interpreter position being offered at board of elections. My job will be to translate the ballots to voters who can’t speak English.

I ask this is haram because voting is shirk (some scholars say this). However, I have seen many poll workers who are Muslim

Hey guys,

What are some pedestrian friendly towns on long land ? New Hyde park, Floral Park, Garden City and Hempstead are a few. What else ?

Hey guys,

I live near NYC and the place where I work is pretty diverse and somewhat segregated. That means, Chinese people talk to Chinese people, Latinos talk to Latinos, and desis talk to desis.

We aren’t largely segregated, we all talk to each other but when it comes to being buddies, we definitely like to stick to one another.

One thing I’ve noticed is that Guyanese people try to have a conversation with Indian/pakistani people. However, they kind of end up standing there without anybody to talk to. The reason is because everyone just starts speaking speaking English and eventually speak Hindi/urdu again . And of course, most Guyanese people just speak English.

The place where I work had lots of older people so they do talk to each other in Urdu/Hindi. So I talk them in Urdu/hindi too. But I feel kind of bad for these Guyanese people because it looks like they want to be a part of us. And they do join the conversation but the moment we start speaking Hindi/urdu, they just awkwardly get quiet and seem left out.

Salam guys,

I heard that dancing is permissible but as long as there is gender segregation. But what is allowed and what isn’t?

Also, music is haram in Islam so how are we supposed to dance without it ?