u/coffeekaye

*the ring is FOR ME TO WEAR,,,, for her to propose to ME with, she didn't buy her own ring*

My girlfriend (F22) told me that she has purchased an engagement ring (in a discussion about whether or not we should end our relationship). She also told me she engraved it with a bible verse.

She is not religious at all. I am not religious at all. Not only am I not religious, but everyone that even KIND of knows me, knows I am extremely anti organized religion and have religious trauma from Christianity.

What would you say about this ring situation? Is it ungrateful to be confused about this?

and yes, i posted about what i should do when she told me about the ring. i decided to keep trying, but i think ive lost feelings from how shes treated me that i dont even wanna keep trying anymore.

Long shot, but does anyone in town play banjo, and if so would you be willing to teach me? I'm looking for probably weekly lessons over this summer.

i ordered a lilac baby emerson bc i kept missing the large restock, but id really prefer the large! anyone on the opposite position lol?

i’ll pay the difference too, for how much more the large cost!

I (F23) went to finally officially end things with her (F22) for the last time and she reveals that she has just bought a ring over the weekend and it is being engraved. After arguing for hours I ended up deciding to keep trying. But I know it’s not going to fix our problems because it never changes. She previously tried to dump me twice the month prior. I brought this up and she said both of those instances were simply my fault and due to my behavior so all i have to do is not act that way anymore.

I just feel so lost. Everytime i try to end things it’s like this, hours and hours of her berating me and belittling me because all of her behavior is justifiable because I make her act that way, and then I somehow fall for it and believe I am the reason we are like this.

We’ve been together for a year, and it’s been like this since June 2025.

i’m not going to give a super long story of context for everything she’s done or all of her abusive behaviors. at the end of the day, i’m too weak to leave

(this relationship is already terrible and i don’t need to recap everything but i had already decided to end things and then this happened that night:)

my girlfriend just hit her dog who's under a year old for throwing up on the bed in the middle of the night. we were sleeping on the phone and she woke up and started yelling at the dog and hit her multiple times and i heard the dog yelling and crying before she slammed the crate shut. i find this unimaginably cruel.

would reporting this to anyone actually lead to anything? i'm planning on leaving after this because i am disgusted by it. she's a little doxie, she's so small.

trying it get into a new hobby and not sure where to begin

edit: i know not all mascs are like this! also people are commenting saying “im a butch and im not like this”. butches are different!! ive never experienced this w a butch. only mascs. but again i know its not all of yall! ive just run into this like 4 times now)

My partner is a masc lesbian (22) and sometimes (recently) she says things that kind of rub me the wrong way, and we can't seem to have a productive conversation about it.

She will say things like

"I can't get along with other women because they're too sensitive"

"I only have straight guy friends because they're less drama"

"I don't get along with other queer people"

"I don't like gay guys, they're too sensitive"

"I know more about guys than girls" (This has been said in both an emotional context, and physical. She will say that she asks her guy friends about what its like being a guy physicall a lot, therefore she knows more about it, then she does about women's bodies).

When we first started dating she wouldn't really say stuff like this. She would start sprinkling it in randomly, but at first it sounded like she was joking.

Then, after we moved in together, she started saying this kind of stuff more, but it didn't sound like jokes at all. I realized she was serious.

Recently, we broke up due to her anger issues and I moved out. I decided to give it a second chance because its not like there was nothing there. Its not like there were good times.

I moved back in with my parents out of state, so she invited me on a month long work trip. I went, and we worked things out before I got there. Things were going so well the first week, but then old habits started coming back.

Her job brought her out on this trip for training, and there were other people from other sights/states training as well.

One of these people was a queer guy. Him and my girlfriend clicked quickly, and got along. She was telling me how excited she was to finally have a queer friend who she got along with because he wasn't "dramatic" or "sensitive".

This was in the first 2 weeks. 2 weeks in, this guys fiance came to visit as well. So it was us four, and we started hanging out.

I got along super well with both of them, him and his fiance. I generally get along with most people, but they were really fun, and we are still in touch now that we have all gone home.

One night, we were all hanging out and my girlfriend kept making butt plug jokes towards this guy (we had all went to a sex store together earlier that day). The first couple times, it was funny. Like the first time she joked about it, his fiance did too. But then she KEPT joking about it, even though he was starting to get annoyed by it, and it was getting overdone.

I could tell it was obviously losing its humor, and it was also just getting overplayed. Like its only funny so many times. And all the jokes she was making for the night were all about him. I also started to feel bad, because it started to feel less like a joke and almost more like making fun of him for buying whatever he bought at the store, like shaming him. It started to kind of rub me the wrong way, but I already knew if I said something in HIS defense, she would get mad at me for siding with someone else and not her.

So then the next day, he was kind of upset with her, and he wasn't joking around with her the same so she got super furious. She came back to the hotel and was like

"this is why i hate gay people, this is why im homophobic, theyre so sensitive and can never take a joke"

and then that same night he finally made a joke back at her expense, and she was so pissed. but he made ONE joke, and she was making fun of him all night. i dont actually remember what the joke was because it was so insignificant that I didn't really internalize it. shes just the kind of person who can dish it but cant really take it. but she doesn't realize that. she herself is INCREDIBLY sensitive.

sometimes i think shes insecure about being so sensitive, and maybe she just sticks with her main guy friends because theyve been friends so long that they know what bothers her and doesnt, so it safer.

But she is always getting upset at queer people who attempt to be her friend, because she thinks they are too sensitive, when in reality she will make jokes at peoples expense (because she does this to me too) but when its done in return, she becomes homophobic.

and at first when she joked about being homophobic, i thought it was a joke, but i am starting to think its not. I dont like being the soul exception to homophobia?

i used to think this was behavior drilled into her by society, and her ubpringing. this isnt my first time encountering a masc like this. in fact, almost every single one i have met has been EXACTLY LIKE THIS. but i dont know if this is behavior that can change.

i try my hardest to reason with her and have an actual conversation about why it bothers me. random sexist comments (she also games a lot and will genuinely say like "i hate when girls are on this game") are super weird. its been a lot more common recently like since we got back together. maybe im just less blinded after our time apart.

why are so many mascs this way :/

like shes NOT homophobic on paper like she supports gay rights, and shes not transphobic. she just..... hates being around them?? its so upsetting. its so discouraging too because i have encountered this SO MANY TIME.

on this trip, the guy she tried being friends with said that if she werent a lesbian, she would sound like a pick me. Because of the comments about having guy friends and not getting along with girls. I kind of agreed, and she got really upset. I clarified that he wasn't CALLING her a pick me, but saying that if she WERENT gay, it might come across that way.

She proceeded to pick a fight with me outside in public about how im immature, and "think like a child" because i think that women HAVE to get along with each other. She proceeded to try and break up with me in the street outside the hotel, and almost left me crying in the lobby, before she changed her mind and took me up to the room.

It seems like there is no changing her mind. It just rubs me the wrong way to be so disagreeable with women and have a low expectation of them. Same with queer people.