u/raspberrylilith20

So this may have been said a million times here. My normal stomping ground is Tumblr, where I am also one of very VERY few Madoka bloggers, so it can be hard to get perspective. But I had a realization a few years ago when thinking about Madoka and what it's trying to say, and that is this; the original anime's ending is intended to be a bad ending, and that the themes of the series are literally incomplete without Rebellion.

I think it's pretty clear that Madoka is about misogyny. That is ALL OVER the series, from Saotome's rants, to Sayaka killing those guys on the train, to the very premise of the show itself. But what is important is that the show does not treat it as an isolated problem. The concept of incubators very explicitly draws a line in the sand. It says "misogyny and sexism are structural problems that cannot be solved on a case-by-case basis. It requires the entire restructuring of the system." And what Madoka does with her wish, ironically, is NOT restructure the system itself. The law of cycles may seem like a mercy, but it only mildly mitigates the issue. Girls are still contracted, still are burdened with responsibility they shouldn't have to deal with, still suffer and still die for the cause of being livestock.

The connections between Faust and Madoka Magica are likewise pretty well-known. The series even makes a point of this, by having Madoka's witch be named after one of the main characters, Gretchen. In Faust, Gretchen is representative of the eternal feminine, a concept whose name ALSO made it into Rebellion, which Madokami largely represents. The eternal feminine was a deeply flawed "feminist" movement that the author of Faust introduced, which proposed that women should be viewed as angelic and pure beings worthy of respect and worship. While seemingly feminist on its surface, upon inspection it falls apart. It does what every pseudo-feminist movement does, set a standard for what women should be like, and shames (however silently) women who fail to meet said standards. A woman who fails to be as saintly as Gretchen fails the test and is shunned.

For a while I was unable to understand the dissonance between these 2 things. How could a series so aggressively demonizing misogyny lean on such an outdated, sexist movement? But then it clicked. Madoka, as the eternal feminine, is flawed in her solution to the structural issue causing sexism to take place in her world. As such, it comes down to Homura to resolve the problem by tearing her from heaven and forcibly taking hold of the system itself. She is attempting to take matters into her own hands.

Let's go back to Faust. The premise is that the titular Faust makes a deal with a demon, Mephistopheles, to gain knowledge and power. He uses the demon to gain the love of Gretchen, and has a child with her, which destroys her. She drowns the illegitimate child and is condemned for murder, but her innocence still gets her into heaven. In Goethe's version (the one that Madoka seemingly pulls from) Faust is allowed into heaven as well despite his deal due to his constant striving. I don't know about you, but I can already see a lot of parallels here. Faust (Homura) makes a deal with the devil (an incubator), the terms of which are a year of power (a wish/the short lifespan of magical girls and their powers) and (within her view) corrupts Gretchen (Madoka), but Gretchen makes it to heaven due to the eternal feminine (she ascends to godhood) and Faust makes it into heaven too (Homura is rescued from the incubation barrier).

But there's a pretty big divergence here, right? First off, Homura prevents being freed from the barrier, essentially undermining the ending of the original story. Homura's "sin" is largely subjective. In Rebellion there's plenty of signs of self-hatred and depression, such as her familiars throwing pomegranates at her (like rotten tomatoes), the guillotine and funeral imagery for Homulilly, the way her soul gem distance test reads like a suicide attempt. Homura believes herself to be Faust, the one who corrupted a pure, perfect being with her actions, which is represented by a hand reaching out for her that is covered in cuts. It shows how Homura views Madoka reaching out to her, always ending up hurt but doing it nonetheless. And informed by this self-hatred, she attempts to do what she thinks she deserves, and what Faust didn't; to go to hell. She rips Madoka apart, essentially waging war on heaven, because she sees herself as the devil. But she isn't. For however much she acts like she is Faust, she simply isn't. Madoka does not and should not hate her. She did nothing wrong to deserve the punishment she faces. Her hijacking of the system, while imperfect, comes from a place of awareness beyond Madoka; she sees that the cause of misogyny is structural, so she fundamentally changes it to close off the incubators and torture the ones that are left.

In essence, the reason for what I saw as dissonance was actually because of the message the series had for us the whole time; that sexism and misogyny is caused by structural issues like the patriarchy and capitalism, and that individual solutions or the softening of the consequences will not fix anything. The system has to be gutted and remade from the inside out. It's an inverse of Faust, where the eternal feminine is wrong and Faust was right. And it is for that reason that it is impossible for the series to actually be complete without Rebellion and the upcoming Walpurgisnacht Rising.

All this to say, this is why I had beef with people hating Rebellion back in like 2016, even if I didn't have the right words for it yet lol

I know sometimes that happens, for instance Rebuild of Evangelion 3+1 dropped on Amazon prime the same day that it went out in theaters. But do we know if SHAFT made a similar deal? Or are we going to have to wait for either American theatrical releases or a streamable version people can subtitle?

If the actual Hi8 camera potentially used for some filming (but also maybe just a prop) is the same one the actor playing the subject owns in real life per Summerdrive, I know for a fact that his camera is a Samsung Digitalcam. While Samsung is more of a tech giant these days and usually stands toe-to-toe with Apple with their Galaxy phone line, back in the day they were more of a mid-tier clone brand. The first Galaxy phone was one of their first big swings into creating a leading product.

Sony was the king of media technology in those days. They even sold the largest CRT television ever created, which came with documentation regarding where it was safe to place it in a building due to the weight. During the Hi8 days, Sony's camera line was the Sony Handycam (of which I happen to own one, procured in-box at a thrift store for $20). Sony is still big nowadays but they've lost their luster on the media tech front. They still make phones, cameras, media players, but they aren't nearly as all-encompassing.

What does this mean for the subject? Well, nothing really. The build quality of the camera might be a little worse, but it doesn't make much difference. Maybe it speaks to a childhood that wasn't the richest, given his N64 was likely purchased during the final year or production, when it would be cheapest. His parents might look at the price difference between Sony and Samsung and go for the cheaper option. But realistically it probably means nothing. It's just weird where your niche knowledge will take you sometimes.

I got into Stanley Parable all the way back with the first remake after the HL2 mod and remember the Raphael trailer being a formative piece of culture for me. Still love that video. But since I was young, I kinda just accepted the premise at face value and only just recently considered the idea that it was all just a joke that Davey wrote. Has he, or anyone else who worked on Stanley Parable ever definitively stated if it was a real email or just a bit? I feel like upon reflection it's almost certainly just a bit but it would be infinitely funnier if it was real.

I decided to invest in a Naga mouse a few years ago that was like $200 because it had a lot of neat features and figured it would last me a really long time with that price tag. It technically still works, but wireless mode is super jank now even with every fix on the forums having been tried. It still works fine in wired mode, but now I'm worried about the longevity of it seeing as wireless is pretty simple to pull off these days and that broke pretty quickly.

If it'll last me forever I would pay $200 again, but would greatly prefer something a bit cheaper. Wireless or wired is fine, but the option to swap is nice. Side buttons are basically a must these days, and obviously all the standard affair like being able to change sensitivity, scrolling modes, etc etc. What's worked for everyone here?

EDIT: Somehow I am getting the feeling that maybe I should get a G502 Logitech mouse....not sure why, just a feeling.....

I have been able to convince some friends that trust my tastes in media but otherwise it is such a hard sell. I just have to say "yeah it's a podcast about farming and cows but it's super funny, trust." Even mentioning that it has won comedy awards doesn't work that well. How have you managed to convince people to give the podcast a chance?

Since the entire series is shown to us through a camera, everything is filtered through that lens. Normally that would show objective reality, albeit through tape grain and at 480p, but nesters have been shown to have effects on electronics, which means that there are potentially instances where the subject sees objective reality but we can't. That got me thinking about Mr. Whiteout and his appearance.

Mr. Whiteout is solid black, but notably looks sorta like static or a video distortion. I wonder if something about his appearance sorta "self-censors" on the subject's camera. Maybe the reason for the name has to do with the way his appearance is totally obfuscated on the camera, and his appearance is totally visible to the subject? It would explain why the subject called him that, given a whiteout as a term is basically only used for blinding snow weather, which makes it hard to discern the name choice. Being blocked out on the camera might do it.

While rewatching the movie today I made some observations that I find quite interesting. I think most people already know the Backrooms is tangentially related to dementia, given its ties to the project Everywhere at the End of Time, a musical project representing the decay of a mind. But it was on this rewatch that I think I connected the dots fully.

There is a sequence in the movie where Mary's childhood living room is shown progressively melting into the yellow-walled Backrooms office space. I believe this is how the complex works. It makes a copy of everything and everyone, but it isn't quite perfect. Memories aren't, after all. And then, like a real brain, it remembers those memories, and the defects start to stack. Every time a memory is cycled it is a bit more distorted, and the complex adds another layer. The cross-section Mary crawls over to get to the copy of Clark's store may be a visual metaphor for how it works. Layer after layer is stacked on top of each other, resulting in the kind of stack we see in the sequence I called out above. And like a brain with dementia, it becomes increasingly homogenized and blurry.

The reason I think the connection to dementia is so important is because I have experience with it within my own family. Visiting a facility where dementia patients are housed gives you a harrowing look at what it's like; not necessarily because of how sad it is, or because the person you knew is gone, or anything like that. No, the reason it is so sad is because of the prevalence of memories of work.

It is not uncommon to see dementia patients ONLY remember work. They constantly talk about needing to get to work, stress themselves out over how many people are relying on them. It cuts deep into my core thinking about how much time we have to spend doing back-breaking thankless labor in the modern world, and how if any of us develop dementia we might only remember the misery and not any of the joy experienced in the off hours. And the Backrooms is built around the aesthetic of an office space or furniture store.

I think the reason Backrooms ties itself to dementia is to make a very explicit point about the nature of capitalism and how it steals our time, our bodies, and even our minds, until all we can remember is hazy, inconsistent memories of the workplaces we spent 90% of our lives at, and absolutely nothing that hasn't been constructed around a corporation making money.

It's a representation of hell, in a way, but one we ourselves constructed and trapped ourselves in. The Backrooms sees what we have done to ourselves and holds a mirror up. It's not the only point Kane is making, but I can't unsee it as a foundational part of the movie's message anymore.

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I've been playing with DH and chunky for a while, and am used to seeing the upper warning about chunky's LODs, but recently I have started getting a new warning about how I should be using a concurrent garbage collector. I tried looking it up, but honestly I don't even know what to look for. What even is a garbage collector? How would I install it/use it?

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I think the reason for the scene where Kat can see Clark seemingly through a wall was to serve as a connection to the ending, where Phil is looking at what he knows is a one-way mirror. I haven't fully decided why that was chosen but I think it's basically the only line I'm able to draw. Maybe it's because both Phil and Clark are being overseen by some higher force and have to tread carefully? Their lives are in danger and they don't even know yet? I'm sure someone can phrase it better than me, but there's definitely something here.

I keep seeing this take around the fandom that it doesn't really make sense that the subject could have beaten that nester to death with his N64 because clearly nesters have to be super powerful and durable to be as dangerous as the subject deems them. I wanna clarify right here, right now that we currently have 0 reason to believe nesters are any more powerful than a human being. They are 100% supernatural in some capacity, but that does not mean in any way that they are stronger than a human.

The only reason you aren't terrified to go outside every day is because largely speaking humans are civilized. Mothers can lift cars off their children with the right conditions blasting them with adrenaline. The bite force of a human could rip someone's neck apart and cause them to bleed out within less than a minute. People beat each other up and kill each other with their bare hands. Humans are VERY dangerous under the right circumstances.

The reason nesters are so dangerous is that they have the strength of a human but no human civility or reason. A mid-stage nester will just break through windows because it does not respect boundaries. Any human could do that right now, but the vast majority won't, because why would we? THAT is why the subject is so scared of them.

Aperture TAG is generally considered the black sheep of Portal fan campaigns, but honestly it isn't a mod without potential. I've been thinking about TAG a lot and have come up with some ideas that I think would transform the mod from a controversial mid-tier campaign into something genuinely really cool and worth standing alongside the greats.

First and foremost, this hypothetical remake would be coded in Strata Source. I push for Strata for basically every Portal project because it is objectively better than normal Source, but in the case of TAG in particular there is a huge advantage; one of the big failings of the mod is that it very badly wants the player to be able to strafe and surf like in CS:GO, but the Portal 2 version of Source lacks the movement capabilities. Strata, however, is built on the CS:GO version, which would allow the player to actually use the ramps and curves the way the developers intended. This alone would already go a long way towards mending the mod, but that is just the first of many design changes.

Second, the gun. I understand that the gimmick was the gel gun, but honestly, nixing the portals is counterintuitive. In a game about momentum and pulling off tricks and stunts, the lack of ability to place portals means that the chambers are inherently limited. So my second change is that the player now starts with a normal portal gun and is then handed an addon that fires gels. This gel addon, which will surely have an overly-complicated Aperture name in the remake, has 2 modes; it either fires orange gel in a vertical line, or blasts blue gel in a small circle. In my mind, the player has to swap between portal and gel modes, and they can only fire one gel at once. Hopefully, this restriction would prevent the player from firing gels constantly in order to cheese the movement options and skip out on the cool part. The player would have to pull stunts midair by swapping modes and just barely shooting gels or portals in time. The player having to make these decisions and have agency over their stunts would go a long way towards ensuring that they feel like a badass pulling them off. Imagine having to use portals to give yourself a light barrier so you can fire blue gel at it to keep bouncing yourself forward, having to place portals midair to keep launching yourself, using portals to throw gel around in the right spots. So many cool options that would have been inaccessible otherwise!

Third, taking inspiration from White Knuckle, as well as a cheeky nod to Mel, the game is now a vertical climb with toxic goop steadily rising under the player. This keeps pressure on the player to think on their feet and solve the puzzles quickly, while also making sure there is an obvious progress indicator. Perhaps, like White Knuckle, the chambers could have multiple possible routes, which would make the time pressure feel a little more fair than it would otherwise. It would also fundamentally change the game design and make TAG stand out more than it does currently, where it is largely just gel puzzles, something that already exist in the main campaign. Portal 2 even already has the large vault doors, which could easily emulate the behavior of the bulkheads in White Knuckle.

Fourth, as long as Strata is the chosen engine, this remake would benefit heavily from multiple restored puzzle mechanics that Revolution and P2:CE have reintegrated into the game, such as the adhesive gel, the pipes, breakers, and the schrodinger's cubes. The pipes and adhesion gel in particular would add several new radical movement options to the game and enhance the feeling I'm going for. Adhesion gel would likely be too OP to make available all the time, so perhaps it could be a limited-use last resort option that can be replenished if the player goes out of their way to make risky plays to get ahold of more to load into their gun.

Finally, to address perhaps the biggest problem people have with the mod, this new version would release for free, and instead utilize the moneymaking method used by Portal Revolution. The devs of that campaign essentially offered DLC that changed the skin of the companion cube as a way to donate a few bucks to the team. The TAG remake could make use of a similar method in order to avoid the criticism lobbied at it for costing money, while also making sure the devs get at least a little something for their effort.

So, what do you think? Would these changes actually turn TAG into something that could stand toe to toe with Portal Revolution and Mel? And what else would you suggest for a TAG remake?