r/entitledparents

I’m a 31 year old woman who lives with my mom to pay off debt and tuition. The job market is rough and this makes my life mostly easier, except for the fact that she requires my location to stay with her. It’s been this way since I was a teenager. When I was younger, she put a tracking device on my car. No surprise, I’m not the most mentally stable person because of this. I feel like a child being in this situation, but am trying not to lose my cool as I plan to move out quietly soon.

When I lived in New York 2021, I would periodically turn off my location, and she’d freak out on me. Blew up my phone, nonstop texts, and threatened to call the police. When I didn’t reply right away, she’d make crazy claims- one being that my brother’s dog (who we raised together) had died.. he didn’t. It’s wild to me that I’m even living with her again, but I’m hoping it won’t be too much longer. Nothing has specifically blown up recently, I’m just feeling a lot of resentment. As you could imagine, requiring my location is just the tip of the iceberg, but I don’t want to overwhelm this post.

Hello! I'm a F(17), recently my mom has decided to go back and live with my father ( he lives abroad) with both of my 2 siblings other than me, I did suggest that I could visit them for summer vacations for a week or 2 but my mother said NO! That she doesn't have money for me. Now the thing since I'm gonna be living with my grandma,aunt and uncle I'm basically responsible for everything since my aunt and uncle aren't in the best state mentally and my grandmother being old, I'm gonna be one taking care of the house and every other responsibility.I don't know what to do anymore! I'm so goddam frustrated like my parents did this shit of leaving me in some country and going abroad when I was only 13 and now she wants to do it again!! For God sake man I won't even be able to leave the house this summer or hangout with my friends since I'm "responsible" for my grandma and her 2 grown ass kids..like I'm not even an adult yet and I'm supposed to act like an adult..

Sometimes my mother says she's gonna take me but sometimes she says no but she made it very clear last week that I'm not going and that I can manage on my own and personally idc anymore I just don't wanna ruin my life by sitting in the house all and looking after others

Am I not worthy of anything? Is my whole point of living js to scarifie my happiness for my mother? I'm so tired, I'm exhausted I can't do this anymore like why can't she just stay here for a month or less , why does she put a burden on me all the time and doesn't even hesitate to leave me in a whole ass different country. I don't even think I can make it to 18 I'm so tired this shitty life there is no point in living.

And also my father isn't fond of me either so I'm basically not my favorite child.

I (29F) have been giving my parents money over the years. I don't even work so technically, my husband gave it to them.
My mother is 56 and my dad is 61. Both of them are not working right now and my dad gets disability checks.

In 2018, my parents did not have the money for property taxes on the family home.
They waited until the last minute, literally ONE month before the house was due for a tax sale to try to come up with the money. My husband then boyfriend took out a loan for $8,000 and sent them the money. They did not return it, even though later, they were in a position to.

In 2024, again, my parents were freaking out about not having the money for the property taxes and my husband and I paid $10,000 so they would not lose their home. The total amount due was $12,000 and after reluctantly giving the 10k, my mom asked if I could just "pay the whole thing." I said no and my uncle paid $2,000. Even after all this, my mom asked if I could pay the electricity bill for $1200 because the lights were about to get shut off. I said no. I couldn't believe she would even ask after how much we paid.

Since then, they still text and call me over emergencies I’m not responsible for. They need money for the internet bill. They need money for the water bill. They need money for whatever. If I say I don't have any money, they tell me to use a credit card. I don't want to!!

I told my mom a few months ago I can’t keep doing this anymore because it’s damaging my finances and it’s incredibly draining. She said she wouldn’t ask me for anything ever again and she didn’t want to be a burden.

I don’t live in the same state and recently came back to visit for my brother’s graduation. The requests are still coming and now they keep asking for $10, $20, small amounts. I guess they think I don’t mind. My mom was out the other day and texted to ask for $14 for a subway sandwich. I texted back I didn’t have it and she “disliked” the text. Later, she asked me for $2.

I’m so tired.

When I was in eighth grade, a few months before graduation, I got pulled into a meeting with my mom and principal and told I couldn’t graduate with the class I’d been with since kindergarten because my mom was behind on my tuition. I knew we weren’t well off but I hadn’t know the extent of until then.y mom used the shocked tears she knew I’d shed as leverage to convince the principal to let me finish.

Two months into sophomore year of high school, that principal pulled me aside and told me my tuition from the last year hadn’t been paid and I wasn’t allowed back on Monday.

I started my senior year late and in a third school because of her inability to handle finances.

In my 20s I cleaned out my bank account to get her out of a hotel because she was evicted.

Pre-Covid, I did it again.

Post-Covid, I made the mistake of a lifetime and ended up having to file bankruptcy because of her negligence and my stupidity in letting her use my name for something.

I blocked her, bided my time rebuilding yet again, and was eventually able to leave the state to start over.

Today I’ve gotten nonstop messages from family I haven’t heard from in years because she estranged us from them. ‘Why are you being so heartless? Your mom’s on the street. She has no one. You’re her daughter.’

I have always been expected to clean up her messes. I finally say no and I’m shamed by family I barely know. Life is exhausting.

I (28F) knew things were going good for too long. A few annoyances and little jabs that are meaningless because she I'm just accustomed to them, but I knew it was going to get worse at some point. It always does.

She did it. She went in my fucking room when I wasn't looking, rushing around for sweets. Like I dreaded she would do. And before I did, she scolded me for simply forgetting to put my washing away, as if no one else has done it before and it simply couldn't wait until the morning.

She took that opportunity to go sneaking in my room. She made sure I was busy, and snuck in so I wouldn't have a go at her! She asked me where my sweetie stash was, despite me having told her a couple of hours ago I have none. Which is the fucking truth. This is why I'm scared to leave anything in my room, because it doesn't have a lock. This place is rented. It didn't have a lock anyway.

My face fell when I saw she was in there, and she began grinning at getting caught.

She is sixty in a few months. I'm fed up with it. This is why I don't buy lots of sweets anymore so I don't keep buying any for the week, because she always wants to have mine. She has millions of gluten free stuff, why can't I have anything that's mine? I don't always want to share, in fact I only offered for her to have some of my chocolate earlier because it's one I'm not fussed about, for once.

It's why if I buy snacks, I hide them in my bag or deep in my other drawers. It's my hard earned money, I don't get a lot of time to myself. So much joy has been sucked out of me, can't I have one thing?

The invasion of privacy has always been a problem. I keep jumping when I hear my door, I've thrown my phone down on the floor a few times because I'm worried she'll catch me typing this.

I've told her about it feeling like I have no privacy before, she just laughs until I get mad and then she screams at me.

I've started making plans to move into a house share. Only literally started. It will be so fucking hard and frightening for me since I can't cook apart from basic meals, and I assume she'll have to find out at some point because of our rent situation of this current apartment.

But I just want some privacy and time to myself. I've had a shit shift, and I just want to relax. I was watching one of the toy story films before this for fucks sake!

I told her for about her gluten free snacks she can have, but she just says stuff like 'sometimes a girl wants a haribo'. (If I was less sensible, I would've snapped 'and a girl wants her room to herself', but that wouldn't have ended well)

This is why I try so hard to get overtime where I work, so I spend as little time with my mother as I can. I know this sounds harsh on its own, but if I talk about all problems with my mother, I'll be here all day.

I (23 M) am paying my mom $500 for rent and she laughs in my face and says it’s nothing and that if i want a strict landlord relationship due to personal tensions she should raise rent when i suggested a contract and wanting to add random clauses to it. i am currently back after doing 6 months in jail for doing dumb things and trusting the wrong people for reasons i wont get into i only went to them desperate cause of tension of being kicked out by my mom during that time and got in trouble i moved on but i been back since october of 2025 and had trouble finding a job till around february in which i barely started and trouble arose. One issue is she is a micro managing control freak who guilts and lashes out if you try to create any boundaries it’s also good to mention im west african togolese all citizens living in the US in texas so goes without saying super religious need to always be right and argumentative nature comes from my mom but getting back on track

i had trouble finding a job but was searching every second till i got one to get away from her and not even a week into my new job trouble strikes i come home after a shift disturbed to see my little sister (14) terrified and crying while my mom is standing over her with a belt forcing her to learn to braid so she can eventually come to braid hair with my mom at her shop and my sister knew how to braid the ends but not start the roots of the hair and her hand was hurting and when i asked if she was okay she burst out in tears and my mother lunged with a belt trying to strike her i pushed my sister out the way and caught the belt and told her to let go she did not and said not to undermine her authority as a result i let go and just tried to civilize with her but she was agitated and wanted to escalate the problem as i was on probation she told me to leave and with probation i have to inform my officer and i thought id mention maybe a visit from cps was necessary since i did not feel safe leaving my sister and little brother there to deal with it alone as i am the only one who steps up to her in the family and my father is dead and never stood up for us and my big brother is always on her side or fence sitting and he told me i was out of line and laughed at the whole thing saying she never listened and did things like not cleaning all dishes in the sink mind and i was confused because that doesn’t make this okay nor justifies my mothers actions. after everything cooled off and it was apparent i wasn’t being kicked out but would no longer get help (i have no car and work is 10min car 1hr 30min walk) i was on my own fully financially. since the issue i want nothing to do with her although i can’t leave but kept my PO noted in every development in my situation she is really cool and understanding. my mother then discussed rent and i was okay with it she first says i need to pay 2 bills and then change it to $500 flat and i agree thats fair as i got a better job working full time.

fast forward now i am cold with everyone simply cause after all the fighting i do for my siblings they always turn on me and act like i do too much for their name sake so i stop engaging with all of them my mother and i dont talk unless about bills with the exception of unsolicited advice which i ignore i pay for my own food transportation clothes phone bill and all and am currently trying to save for a car but thats hard but im trying she recently today tried to talk and scold me on not telling her good morning and i responded if its not about bills there is no discussion because she is nothing more then a landlord to me i also have pad split approved by my PO incase i need to make a quick move and in response she (my mother) gets snarky with me and says if thats what i want ill get what i asked knowing that makes me feel guilty but i need to stand my ground i only feel guilty cause i try to let things slide but when no one hold her accountable ill be the one too even if she’s my mother since every make excuses for her actions as she has done and saïd horrible things in the past before that i need therapy one day to move past all in all she laughs in my face and says do i think 500 is enough for my one room and living mind you i don’t exit my room i cook my food clean after my go to the gym and work and literally talk to no one or say anything i leave her and my siblings be but now 500 is small change to her (we live in a better part of katy) so it is a nice house although she complains about the price and threatens to leave to fuck me over but would never want to sell and continue to put work into the house with your long financial deals like ac replacement and renovations and ect

i’m just wondering if i’m in the wrong if i should pay more and just to be told that im not insane and my feelings are valid…sorry for the long post

Hi so I didn’t know where to post this but I figured here would be best. So I’m 18F almost 19 and I have been taking a lot of this to my friends and need an unbiased source on the situation. My current situation stands that I do not talk to my biological father and that side of the family, the parents in question are my mother and stepfather. They are bio parents to my 3 younger sisters.

To start from the beginning I’ve always had a rocky relationship with my parents and it being back and forth. I graduated high school last year and moved away to a university last fall. Before leaving my mom told me that she would help cosign on a loan but after I graduated it would all go to me and she wasn’t helping at all. My mom doesn’t have any student loans due to the fact that her parents paid for all of her undergrad degree. She also won’t allow me to ask my grandparents for help financially even when they’ve offered. The week after my family dropped me off at college they went away on an expensive vacation and didn’t tell me about it at all. They said that I should he grateful they helped me move in and I got to go to college so my sisters needed something for them. I let it go but this trip does come up later.

My first semester at college I struggled a lot with mental health and my grades were exceptionally low. I’ve struggled before but college amplified it. Over the course of the semester my mom wore me down and convinced me to come home due to the fact that I was struggling and wasn’t able to afford it by myself anymore. I transferred home to a local community college and am doing much better and on better medication with therapy.

Since transferring home my parents have done nothing but give me shit about what I’m doing with my life. Working a part-time job multiple days a week and going to school Monday-Thursday and having top grades is not enough for them. I am constantly told by my parents that I should be grateful they let me move back in and I need to start paying rent or helping around the house. I currently share a room with my youngest sister whom I have a 10+ year age gap with. My old room was given to my other sister a month after I moved away to college. I help around the house a lot by helping with laundry, dishes, my dogs, and any other housework. I also am constantly bringing things to my mom at work and sisters at school. I pick up my youngest sister from school every day before I go to work. Recently it was brought to my attention that I would be driving my sister to a day program multiple times a week. This would include all of the driving I do to work and my other sister, all without assistance from my parents.

My biggest thing recently is that my parents left me home alone for a week and over a holiday to take my sisters on another vacation. If I did go with them however, my mom told me I would have to pay almost $1,000 for my tickets as they wouldn’t pay for them. I did have school and work but was upset about them leaving me alone. My mom refused to speak to me about the vacation and when she did it seemed more that she was attempting to make herself feel better. On this vacation they made an incredibly big purchase while also telling me they have no money and asking me for help. I also am constantly under scrutiny from them and have strict rules. They have called me an alcoholic simply for going out with my friends one night a month. They call me fat when I go out to eat and say I waste my money on stupid stuff.

Overall, I think I am a pretty good kid. I keep straight A’s, I paid for this past semester at college and have a scholarship that covers all of my tuition, I have my own car all paid off by myself that I paid for title registration and insurance and all gas money, I pickup my sister from school everyday, and I work 5 days a week. I pay for groceries and help out with driving my sisters around if my parents are working late and watching my sisters and their friends. Of course, this isn’t all the information and other situations have led to me feeling this way such as my parents leaving me to fend for myself some nights and taking my other siblings out to dinner. My youngest sister constantly hitting and screaming at me and my parents permitting it. Giving my parents money and never receiving any of it back and being yelled at if I ask for it. If needed I am more than willing to provide additional situations that have led to this as well. I feel as though I am a third parent to my younger siblings. I just don’t know if I am overreacting or if my parents are truly not the greatest.

Anyone else have parents (or parent) that fully believes he’s better than professional doctors? Outside of the usual “this medicine will kill you” or “neurological disorders that arent extreme dont exist!” my father takes his god given knowledge a little too far. He made the totally realistic choice of having another kid at the age of 50 with someone over 40, naturally as science proclaims she ended up with a disability that required surgery. After surgery they were told by doctors she is required to wear a brace so it can heal properly, which she did for a few weeks but she’s supposed to wear for months. The brace is big and uncomfortable and my father (and his girlfriend, the kids mom she’s not my mom) didnt like the brace called the doctors stupid and stopped making the kid wear it so now the kid is in constant pain cause the surgery didnt heal properly

My sister (11) got assaulted with a razor by three older girls when she was sleeping in her clss, she has cuts all over her arm for the ordeal and as you can assume Frome a child who never got u

In such an ordeal she kept it a secret for a reason or another. When my mum found out she flipped. Calling my sister out for staying silent shouting and making a big Seen, I try to tell her it's a delicate situation and maybe yelling at a traumatised kid won't help let alone blaming her for it but she yelled at me saying things like "I'm her mother" and "if she loves you so much then why didn't she tell you" . I'm not the greatest at handling high stress situations because of my autism and I can't compete in yelling matches. It's wors when my sister's back her up and I feel at a loss, I think she's at the wrong for belittling her for not remembering their faces or not being supported like it's her fault yet all three (mum and two eldest sisters) say I'm making things worse. I adore my little sister and what happened to her is horrible and I'd appreciate any advice

I (21F) honestly feel like I’m losing my mind. My parents have always favored my brother (17M). He’s their only biological kid, and it shows. I live with my bio mom and stepdad, and the favoritism has been obvious my whole life — but this situation has pushed me to my breaking point.

Last Monday my car broke down. I called my parents before getting a tow because I hoped it was something simple.
It wasn’t.

My car started smoking while I was driving. I paid $160 for a tow and had it taken to my dad’s buddy’s shop. But nobody will tell me what’s actually wrong with it. My dad immediately asked how much money I had saved and said I “needed a new car.”

Before the tow, I crawled under the car myself and didn’t see anything broken. Suddenly my dad claims something is “hanging” and “broken,” but refuses to show me. He even “joked” to his buddy that I destroyed my car. It didn’t feel like a joke.

The only thing I know for sure is that my rear tires had to be manually unlocked because the parking brake somehow turned on by itself.

As soon as we left the shop, my parents started showing me old cars from 2005–2010… while I currently drive a 2017 Titanium Escape that I worked two waitressing jobs for three years to afford.

When I asked what about my car, they said they’d “fix it up and give it to my brother.”

My dad claims he gets to decide because he once put $6,000 toward the car after a government shutdown — and because I get paid to go to school due to his 100% military disability. So suddenly it’s “his” money and “his” car.

They refuse to put the car in my name. They want me to buy a new one… in his name again.

My brother has never had a job. He plays video games all day. Doesn’t help around the house. Eats everything. Barely passes high school. They can’t even trust him to wake up on time. But somehow he “deserves” my car more than I do.

Since my car broke down, I’m not allowed to walk anywhere in town — not even to the IGA or Dollar General. I feel like a hostage in my own home.

I’ve been depressed about the car, and my mom cornered me in my room demanding to know why I was “acting depressed.” When I said it was my car, she told me:
“You need to stop being depressed because you’re making me depressed.”

I broke down crying. I’ve told them before that I struggle with suicidal thoughts, and their “help” back then was… dyeing my hair.

I finally told her I’m on anxiety meds and trying to get therapy. She said she doesn’t know why I’m like this because I “have life made.”

This part hurts the most though.

My elderly neighbor — who was like a grandmother to me — passed away a few days before Mother’s Day. Her husband told my parents I was absolutely invited to the funeral and so were they.

My mom decided for me that I wasn’t going.
It was down the road.
But because I don’t have a car (at the time), I’m “not allowed to walk anywhere.”

She prioritized my sister’s monthly meeting instead — a meeting that isn’t even important.

My parents are suddenly talking about buying the trailer next door and “moving me out there,” maybe even hinting my boyfriend could move too. But I’m not getting my hopes up — it feels like bait to make me drop my guard.

I’ve gone cold and distant. They notice, but I don’t care. I’m tired of being their maid, their emotional dumping ground, and their afterthought.

I’ve decided to give up the car. If they want to hand it to my brother, fine. I’ll get a new one — probably a Toyota RAV4 or Honda Civic — and I will not pay a dime if my stepdad insists it must be in his name.

I’m just done.
Done being controlled.
Done being guilt‑tripped.
Done being treated like I don’t matter.

Also is this all narcissistic behavior or what? how would y’all explain the situation after reading this. I posted it to AIO , definitely know i’m not in a loving home after this rollercoaster but i needed to vent and felt this was very entitled like behavior out of my parents.

I’m 22 F about to graduate college. This problem is about my outfit for graduation photos.

I picked out an outfit, yes from my closet, but I have so many clothes and many have not been worn yet. The outfit I chose is a nice blouse (vintage with tags still on it), vintage dress pants, and vintage shoes (not been worn). My friends all love the outfit I chose and so do I.

My dad is the one taking the photos so of course I showed him prior.

He started being very rude saying:

You have no clothes.
They are all thrifted and stained.
You have put zero effort into anything and don’t care.

I did go out multiple times and buy other clothes and he was there through some of it. I sent the other outfits as well as my vintage one. So zero effort is wrong, I think he just doesn’t like my options and has to belittle me for some reason. Also I’m a full time student and I work part time, how much effort am I supposed to devote to this…I’m exhausted as is.

I can get where he’s upset but at the same time I ended up liking the vintage outfit way more than the new clothes I bought. I felt good in it and was very very excited about it. He crushed that feeling immediately.

He seems to have a “I’m always right” personality. In fact we talked about shoes earlier and he asked my shoe size, to which I responded with, “idk it varies.” Boy did that make him mad. He started rambling on about everyone having a shoe size. I said that’s true but companies don’t all manufacture the size the same way. And I then said my closet ranges from 5 1/2 to 8 and he said that was “impossible,” and started making fun of me for thrifting again, “You must have banged up worn out shoes then.”
But alright. Guess I’m lying.

I think the main problem is he googled ‘women grad outfit,’ and they all are wearing a white dress. I’m going to go get a white dress this week because it’s not worth the extra arguing, and I’ve already been crying too much over this.

I’m just not excited about anything anymore and feel very overwhelmed about how the photoshoot is going to go down.

His tone and comments just always crush me and have my entire life. And there’s nothing I feel I can do about it.

If anyone has a parent that acts like this I would love to know how you handled it.

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Edit: just want to say thank you for everyone who has commented. A lot more than I was expecting and you all have truly made me feel better.

Don’t laugh at me but I did end up finding a really cute white dress at target when I was grocery shopping. I tried it on and I do really like it and I’ll be wearing my cute ballet flats with it…which he doesn’t like cause they’re not heels I’m sure.

I’m still upset that I feel like I can’t just wear what I want in the first place. I truly do like my dress with the flats a lot more than my vintage fit because I’ve been wanting to dress more feminine.

But I feel icky for liking something my dad tries shoving down my throat. He always tried to force me to wear dresses growing up which just made me hate them and anything feminine. I’m slowly now trying to be more feminine because I WANT TO not because of him. But idk it also feels tarnished in a way. Not sure if that makes sense lol.

But with yalls encouragement I feel much better about everything and I’m just going to ignore his comments because it really is my special day not his.

I (F15) and Mom (F50) have been arguing quite a bit lately and I really don’t think that I am in the wrong here, but I have my doubts.
I wanted to go to the store, for medical reasons, my therapists have said that when I want to buy food, I should buy food. So we drove to the store and when we arrived I got out of the car almost immediately after we parked because for a long while I have been uncomfy with my mother. This store has two entrances, I walked to the farther one and waited a few minutes to make sure that she had gotten into the store so that we could eventually meet up. Eventually I saw her and I began my shopping while she started her shopping. After about an hour or so, we met up and went over to the self checkout. We both used our own station, which is important to note because my mother had decided that she wanted to distance herself from me when shopping. So we both unloaded our baskets and scanned our items. This next thing is important, I entered HER phone number so that she could get some savings because she seems so set on budgeting me. Later, I wave her over and let her know that she can pay. A couple seconds later she glares at me and says ‘so you just want me to pay for that?’ To which I say yes because that is what you do at a store after all. Apparently she was so against paying because she was so convinced I put in my points, which I said I didn’t and she said she didn’t believe me.
Finally, I do convince her to pay and we load all our stuff into her same reusable bag. This bag was quite heavy and I wasn’t in a spot where I could carry it so I ask her to grab it. In response she whips around, with daggers for eyes, and yanks it out of my hands and storms off out of the store.
Later in the car, she admits to me ‘(my name), I’m angry’. Ok, good for you for recognizing an emotion. So I don’t say anything, and she finally reveals why. ‘I’m angry that you didn’t walk with me into the store, you didn’t even wait for me.’ Like, I’m sorry, 1) I did, 2) This isn’t making my opinion about you much better.
(Hopefully i wrote this in a way that you guys know that this is in fact not a first occurrence so imo my frustration is warranted) Thanks for Reading! :)

Me(16f) and my mother recently got into a fight because I lied that I was going to study with my friends but instead spent the whole day with my boyfriend (18m) in London. I told her shortly before going out that I had lied, apologised a lot and said I didn’t understand why I kept letting her down. She seemed calm and responded saying we would talk about it when I got home (I was staying at my dad’s house at the time). I felt much better and still went out.

Today as she came home her attitude had completely shifted and she looked pissed (understandably). She told me to come speak to her in her office and then continued to shout at me for 30 minutes saying I had manipulated her, used her, and constantly lied to her. I didn’t agree but kept my mouth shut. She kept saying my dads parenting was to blame for the horrible way I acted and then brought up a past argument where I had told her I didn’t feel like she listened to me asking how I expected her to do that when I lied so much. For context she refused to believe I had ADHD (have finally been diagnosed and am on meds which she is completely against) for most of my life, even after bringing it up repeatedly, and doesn’t believe me with minor things (this started long before any major lies/arguments). I was told by my therapist (not diagnosed) that I am depressed (not suprising as I have SH’d for most of my life even as a 6yro. Tried to KMS once which no one knows about).

She always tells me to think of a punishment for myself but never makes it clear what she wants out of it, I try to reason with her but she just says I manipulate her. She always makes everything about herself, for example when she told me about how my SA’er (her ex) claimed to have 🍇 me, she started crying saying how scared she was and told me a 20 minute long story about herself. Idk wtf to do, she’s a good person but idk how to work with her when she acts like this.

I’m scared I’m just breaking up our relationship further and I don’t want to fall into a su!c!dal episode again. Also what punishment should I pick?

So my dad, 78 broke his hip last year but cant be alone and my stepmom is gone in Europe to visit her daughter and their home health nurse is taking a week vacation. Here's the deal. My dad bought both my sisters homes. And cars and everything else but it's not the point. The point is I've never received a literal dime. Ever. Not ever. They live in the same neighborhood within 4 blocks. I live 3 hours away, and work full time and in spite of not getting one vacation day in 7 years they just acted like naturally I should just be required to take two weeks off during the busiest time of the year to help him out. He told me he used to be proud of telling people he had a son but now he tries to forego it because he doesn't like saying "he's a recovering addict." Meanwhile my sister who lives 2 blocks away is home on maternity leave for their like, 84th baby in 3 years, not literally but 3 in 5 years. Why can't she do literally anything? Like why am I expected to give up my time when the same was never done ever for me? This is rhetorical. I just can't fathom the entitlement. I am not a transactional person by nature and in fact hate when people are but you gotta give SOMETHING, DUDE.

A few weeks ago I was on a 6-hour plane ride, sat in front of a three year old child.

I try to be very patient with kids on planes, as I know their parents are (usually) doing the best they can and are probably way more stressed and panicked about their child misbehaving than I am.

That being said, the child I was sitting in front of was kicking my seat non-stop for hours on end. Purposely, and pretty hard. However, mom was asking her to stop, so I just leaned forward and let it slide for the majority of the ride. I’ve had a lot of pretty egregious plane experiences where the parent isn’t even trying, so at this point even a modicum of effort is appreciated. But as we got into the last hour of the flight, I started to get pretty annoyed. While I initially appreciated that the mom was asking her kid to stop, I was getting pretty frustrated by the fact that that clearly wasn’t working, and there were no further attempts beyond just saying stop. Never took her kid for a walk up and down the aisle, never put her hand on the kids legs to keep her from kicking. I was also slightly grumpy as I had tried to get some sleep but everytime I was close to falling asleep, I’d be jolted awake by a hard kick.

Finally, as we’re entering into the last hour of the ride, the kid starts kicking as hard as she can. Mom isn’t saying anything. So I turn to the back, don’t really make eye contact with the kid or anything, just turn in the general direction so I can be heard, and said in a very nice tone “please stop kicking my seat”.

Bad move.

Mom flips her shit.

Mom: “You do not speak to my child. She is three.”

I respond, again as politely as I can “I understand that, but I did pay for this seat-“

Mom: “No, you do not ever speak to my child. I have asked her to stop-“

Me: “-I’ve heard and I really do appreciate that-“

Mom: “She is three years old. You speak to me, you don’t get to tell my child not to kick your seat”

Me: “I said please, I was trying to be polite.”

She just keeps repeatedly telling me that I don’t get to speak to her child, and I’m just repeating “Okay, I’m sorry, I was trying to be polite”

Keep in mind, I didn’t really even speak to her kid, just said it in their general direction. Not like I got up from my seat and made eye contact with the child or anything.

Finally I just turn around to get the interaction to end. Cried a little bit lmao. But was comforted by the thought that I was polite throughout the entire interaction, and I don’t think there was anything I could’ve done that wouldn’t have resulted in the mom being an asshole. I’m sure if I asked her, instead of the child, I would’ve received a similar response.

Personally, I truly don’t see what I did as wrong. I was incredibly patient for 5+ hours. I was very polite with my request. And, I’m sorry but if your child is old enough to be negatively impacting another person, then they’re old enough to be told to stop by that person. Especially if they’re refusing to listen to their parents. Gentle parenting can be a good tool, but when it’s not working, time to open the toolbox back up and find something else.

It seems like a recent trend that parents refuse to let their kids be corrected or told off by anyone but themselves and that’s just odd to me. I understand that kids will be kids, but I don’t really see why that means I’m required to allow your kid to kick me for 5 hours and never once ask her to stop. And what happens when that kid then enters school, and goes out into the real world? How is your child going to learn to take correction from someone who isn’t their parents if their parents won’t even allow them to be spoken to? And who do you think your child will grow up to be if nobody but you is allowed to correct them on their poor behavior?

I literally had my headphones on and was minding my own business. He sneezed, I obviously didn't hear him, and he took it as a personal insult and started screaming at me for being disrespectful. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

So I live alone and Im a single girl in my early to mid twenties. I decided to let my parents have my location because I really don't have anything to hide. However, my parents and I have a history to say the least.

My dad was physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive to me and my mom for my whole childhood. She refused to leave him because she was so against divorce but he would treat her like garbage every day. He would talk down to her like she was nothing. Break her phone, scream at her, call her horrible names. I would beg her to leave him every time he would do this to her and to us.

Well on top of this, he violated my privacy many times growing up. There were times he made me cuddle with him, he would walk in on me changing until I turned 16 and starting balling my eyes out because he wouldn't stop walking in. He'd even do things like slap my butt and he made comments about my boobs to my ex boyfriend apparently.

Well, first off, the reason why I still have a relationship with him is because when I confided in my mom about having PTSD at 16 years old, she blamed it on me because I didn't forgive my dad for what he did. So I always felt like I needed to forgive him or else it's still gonna cause me pain.

But anyways, I hung out with friends a few nights ago. We had some drinks. At some point, my phone must have died. My phone was probably dead for 15 hours because I went to bed without plugging it in. I told my friend that he could sleep on my couch so he didn't have to drink and drive. Well, at 6:00am he barged into my apartment freaking out thinking I died or something. He came into my room, saw me asleep, and asked my friend who he was and then he left.

I woke up really disoriented and confused. I found out that my dad came inside without my permission and It just really left a sour horrible feeling in my gut. Like I couldn't eat for two days. I could just feel my stomach digest itself but I just felt so much anxiety and I just felt so depressed. So I tried to confide in my mom while also setting a boundary.

I really tried to watch my tone going in to the situation because I know how she can be but I basically told her that my dad going into my apartment while I'm asleep made me feel really uncomfortable. I told her that I am an adult and while it is irresponsible to let my phone die, I am capable of looking after myself as I pay all my own bills besides for my car insurance.

She told me I was condescending and that I was talking down to her like she was stupid and less than me. I told her that my tone was just the same as my normal tone and she said that I think I'm so smart or something like that. She immediately started raising her voice and telling me how I was a dramatic and that they were just worried about me and it's not a big deal.

She talked to me like a coworker she hates. And I went into it being mindful of my tone. I just tried to make things clear that what he did crossed a line for me. I'm her only kid. I tried to have a heart to heart with her and she basically just devalued everything I had to say and minimized it. I told her that I was being nice by giving them my location and because he had crossed a line, that I would be deciding to remove the location app from my phone.

Then she threatened to stop paying my car insurance if I did that. So I told her that she was weaponizing the one thing they still help me with. She talked to me so disrespectfully. She completely threw herself away for the sake of not getting a divorce. She was a different person when I was a kid. So now I feel sick to my stomach.

I know what I have to do. But I tried so hard to give them trust. The one little bit of power they still had, she as willing to threaten me with that in a conversation where I wasn't even being angry or mean. She completely gave up on being any sort of mom to me it feels like. I want to go to college but now I don't feel like I can call them for support or to encourage my dreams. Ive been in so much pain so now I don't want to be hurt again.

Because each time they hurt me, it reopens the old wounds. As much as if tried to be open and forgive it seems like they can't give me any ounce of grace. I don't feel loved by them. I think my value to them is dependent on their control. I never want to let them hurt me again. I will likely just have to ween away. If you're reading this, thank you for taking the time to be here. I feel really alone. I don't know what to do. I don't have siblings. I know it will be okay. At least I hope it will be.

I just don't know. I want to cut them off but I feel so guilty. But after everything they've done to me, they can't even show me some love and compassion right now that I'm an adult.

So this happened last Tuesday and I'm still kind of annoyed about it. I work at a small coffee shop, nothing fancy, just your regular neighborhood place. My shift starts at 7am so I usually leave my phone in my bag because I can't be checking it every five minutes when there's a line out the door.

My mom texted me at like 8:15, then 8:30, then called twice. I didn't see any of it until my break at 9. Before I even got a chance to call her back, the door opens and she walks in. Full coat, purse, the whole thing. She lives 25 minutes away. She drove 25 minutes to my job because I didn't reply in an hour.

She comes up to the counter while I'm literally making someone's latte and goes "I thought something happened to you." I told her I was at work and couldn't check my phone. She said "you could have had your coworker text me." My coworker. Who she has never met. To text my mom that I'm alive and busy makeing coffee.

My manager was super cool about it but I could tell she was weirded out. After my mom left I had to explain that no, this isn't a regular thing, yes I'm fine. I called her on my lunch break and she acted like nothing happened. Didn't apologize, just asked what I wanted for dinner on Sunday. I genuinely don't know how to set a boundary that she'll actually respect because every time I try she pulls the "I'm your mother I just worry" card and somehow I end up feeling like the bad guy.

Basically my stepdad loves belittling me (16F) and my sister (19F), and today he saw her eating something he called disgusting it wasn’t even that bad of a combo, potato soufflé that she made with ketchup. And he KNOWS it helps her down food better with condiments. And plus only eating meaty foods with ketchup isn’t even that weird?? I think…

Anyway, he took a picture of it to show my mother and said something that disgusting needed to have a picture.

So my sister got fed up and she grabbed her phone put it in his face and said “alr so imma take a pic of your receding hairline”.

For context he even got hair transplant surgery and it didn’t work. He also has a bunch of hair products that don’t even work on his hair so he’s sensitive about this.

Our stepdad is a complete ahole in our defense. Like genuinely. He’s a short balding loser who talks shit to his kind wife and stepchildren that he despises to feel better about himself.

My mom is a beautiful dutiful wife by our cultural standards, and me and my sister are straight A students and good kids who don’t sneak out, don’t have bfs, don’t break the rules, etc. Literally anyone that isn’t in our weird af family adores us and calls us perfect children, but nooo our stepdad is repelled by confident women and feel the need to essentially bully us every day.

Mind you dude we help make your food, clean up your house, give you your stupid ass soda and water when you ask for it without any complaints!!! But he somehow still finds the audacity to call us shameful awful cows and pigs, and the insult has kind of worse connotations in our language mind you. The word for shameless is usually used in relation to sl*ts.

And I’m not even going to get into the time a few years ago when my brother who was 13 at the time (and STILL taller than our stepdad lol) defended our mom from our stepdad’s temper tantrum and beat that jerk up. Like…our stepdad had a broken nose and TWO black eyes after that. He wore sunglasses for a while.

He ended up kicking out our brother and sent him across the country to live with relatives because of this. He’s been moving around a lot over the years to live with different relatives and he even dropped out of hs because tbh he went through a lot and had no guidance.

Found out about it by accident. My cousin let it slip during a phone call, thought I already knew

I'm 27, I moved to a different city two years ago for work, I don't call home as often as my parents would like, and I'm not in a relationship which my dad apparently views as a crisis that requires community intervention. None of these things are secrets, we've talked about all of them, I just have a different opinion about what's normal and what requires urgent fixing.

So at some point in the last few months my dad created a group chat with my aunts, uncles, grandparents, and two of my cousins. The stated purpose based on what my cousin described was to "figure out how to help" me. Topics apparently included why I'm not married yet, whether my job is stable, whether I seem happy, and what they as a family could do to "encourage" me to move back closer to home.

I was not in this group chat. My life was being discussed and strategized about and I had no idea.

When I called my dad he didn't really deny it. He said he was just worried and wanted to get everyone on the same page. I asked him what page that was exactly. He said the page where the family supports each other. I said that support usually involves the person being supported knowing about it. He thought I was being ungrateful.

I'm not angry in a dramatic way, I'm just kind of stunned that this seemed like a reasonable thing to do. I'm a grown adult. I pay my own rent. I have not asked for an intervention.