u/BlueShadow98

Obligatory apologies for mobile formatting.

Apparently I’m the AH for not putting this at the beginning of this post and for leaving it out of the original post. He is medically incapacitated. I did talk to his doctors about this. I am medically and financially responsible for him. I take him to all of his appointments, I help him bathe, I cook his meals, I work with him on his PT and speech therapy between his appointments, etc.

So for the past few months I’ve replaced all the sugar in my dad’s sugar dispenser with Splenda.

He’s 73 years old, he’s been living with us due to some cognitive issues after being in the ICU for a couple months. Anyways, the man drinks a gallon of those store bought super sweet tea jugs a day (ya know the ones that have 60g of sugar per 12oz serving) and dumps a massive amount of sugar in his coffee every morning.

He has been doing this for ages, and he has had many fillings, root canals, tooth extractions, etc. the dentists and his doctors tell him to cut back on sugar, but every time he nods along until we get in the car and he spits out “damn doctors can’t tell me how to live my life, I’ll do what I damn well please”

This last time, he had a cavity so bad and so deep and so infected that he wouldn’t even let them pull the teeth it hurt him so bad. We ended up having to take him to an oral surgeon to have them extracted. (btw he does brush his teeth, I remind him to every morning/evening and I monitor him while he does, just in case, but he’s actually really good about brushing, and he uses a water flosser) The dentist told him again this time that if he didn’t cut back on his sugar intake, that she would end up having to give him dentures.

Anyways, so like the title says these past few months I’ve been replacing his sugar with Splenda. I’ve been brewing his sweet tea at home and refilling his jugs. I replaced the sugar in the dispenser with Splenda, and he hasn’t noticed a damn thing……until yesterday, he caught me with the Splenda bag and the tea, and when I tell you that man threw a fit, he had a full blown temper tantrum, yelling about elder abuse. He’s been grumblin about it all day yesterday and today. And keeps going on about it, saying things like “is this actual beef or is it fake” lol My husband agrees with me, my mom (who doesn’t live with us) and my brother say I’m being controlling, and my dad is obviously pissed.

So AITA for replacing his sugar with Splenda behind his back?

ETA: I’ve had him try Splenda before and told him, he said he didn’t like it, and I brewed some homemade sweet tea for me with Splenda one time and he drank it and said he loved it. I told him later that it was Splenda and he was mad.

I’ve also talked to his primary doctor about this as well and he was on board, he is medically incapacitated.

[removed]

Ok so for context I (23M) live in nyc and am an up and coming Front of house engineer in nyc and i had a dog who was a senior and i lived with my father sleeping on his couch, and during the time i was on my fathers couch he found out that his mother (96F) who had moved to Germany decades ago was now the victim of identity theft and her bank accounts were drained so over the course of the last few years we have been flying back and forth to help her and would hire a sitter for the dog right, but when he developed severe arthritis and became incontinent we could no longer do that so we ended up driving him down to my mothers place so she could care for him alongside my grandfather who has Alzheimer's and so he spent a little while down there and he loved it it was like he had a second life he was more manageable in his condition and so we all agreed that with the backyard and my mothers little unruly dog there to keep him active that he should stay down there, so now fast forward a year to 2026 where my grandmothers situation had become more manageable i was working a ton and doing shows as the kincks went on to win the championship and nyc was in an uproar so i asked my father if he could manage this trip without me and i would stay back and work the whole summer and of course as any good parent woud he said of course and so i did but then at the beginning of july i got a call from my mother saying that the dog was on his last days so i dropped everything and bought a one way ticket to florida to spend all the time ii could with him but unfortunately about 2.5 hrs after i had arrived and spoken to him he ended up passing and so we sat down and grieved for him but as the night wore on and we tried to change the subject for a while my mother suggested grilling on her new grill and being that im the only one in the family who can grill i said aii and then we ordered these nice fancy lamb shanks and a steak which all came out to about $95 and I paid for them and the next day they were delivered but then i said to her “why dont we do this up as a lil ceremony for the dog and whatever and she agreed to it and everything was all cool until the next morning now 2 days after we planned this bbq memorial service..... (the rest is down below in the comments)

Okay for context I am (18) F and have lived with my grandparents since I was 9ish after living house to house in my family. We always had hard relationships because they came from a different generation. Also I am lesbian! I only have a few chores around the house like trash and dishes and a few extra things if they need help. I am always happy to do them but they aren’t my chores. I don’t stay home much seeing to me and my grandma don’t get along. She is crazy. For more content my I have caught my grandma cheating on my grandpa for money on my phone when I was younger. She lies about everything. She will put “trash” in the can and say I didn’t take it out. Or even dirty dishes and say I didn’t do them. My grandpa has now been threatening to kick me out if I can’t keep up with my “chores”. I don’t know what to do because they refuse to help me get my license so I can’t get a job to move out and I have tried telling him that she is lying but he only says I am ruining his marriage. Am I the a33hole?

[removed]

I've read lots of stories on this website, so I decided to make a throw-away account and see if i was in the wrong for my actions.

Im newly 55, and my daughter, who is turning 23 in a few months, decided to "make me" something as a suprise. Sje told me she was working on something for my birthday several months ago. I was pretty surprised since she's still in university and often complains to my wife about not having much money or time.

My birthday came, and she dropped by before my wife and I were going to leave for dinner. She gave me her switch and told me, "Play animal crossing. that's where my suprise is." I was a bit confused, but she just smiled and wished me a happy birthday before leaving. We got home, and I picked up her switch. I opened the animal crossing app and walked around. It was a large flat island decorated like a birthday party for a kid. Balloons and cake and all kinda of childish things around. These weird animals walked past, and I tried talking to them but didn't say much besides wishing me a happy birthday randomly. I assume my daughter had a hand in this somehow since her birthday isn't for a few months, and she mentioned her 'villagers' celebrating her birthday during covid, making her happy.

She came by a few days later to pick up her switch and asked what I thought of the gift. And I told her I was confused. It looked like a kids birthday more than one for an adult man with a wife and a kid in college. She looked upset, but she didn't say anything. She took her switch back and said shed talk to me later.

My wife said I was ungrateful, but I told her there wasn't much to be grateful for since there wasn't anything really for me. She called me an asshole but I dont see how I am?

[removed]

Now for some context I am a 14-year-old male that was diagnosed with high functioning autism and while I am smart I do still have problems with normal tasks like dressing myself brushing my teeth and even bathing myself and my teachers have been told numerous times about my behavior plans (504) and how my assignment should go and that I shouldn't be punished based on what I can't do because of what I have and so the day before this incident my math teacher had a meeting with my mom and the director of special ed about my disability and about her not following my 504 plan then the day after she's reading off detention and she says my name and I asked my math teacher who we will call Janet I say "hey Janet why do I have lunch detention" Janet says "because you left your notebook and your desk" and I said "Janet I we had just had a meeting yesterday about how I can't remember some things" and then Janet says "I don't care you forgot it in your desk" so I did the lunch I did the detention and at the end of the year I was graduating and I went to Janet's room and she was in there and I said hey Janet have a great summer but f you so am I the asshole?

I (22F) am fairly sexually active, and yes I use condoms. My mom is in charge of my meds because last year, I tried to take my life by overdosing due to a manic episode. My mom admitted to stopping my PrEP treatment just because my psychiatrist said it's not good to be on it long term. I was pissed, I didn't notice because I didn't think she would stop my medicine without consent. I feel safer on it. I have been lied to about stds before and have been pressured into unprotected sex. I think it's wrong to stop someone's medication without consent if it's not harming them. That's almost like stopping my bipolar meds or not giving me my asthma medication. I have a right to choose what happens to my body and what I put in it. It doesn't matter if anyone thinks I "don't need it", I feel safer on it and have no plans to be monogamous.

AITAH?

Hey guys. I’m hiding in my room sobbing right now. I just don’t know if I should take responsibility or stand up for myself.

Earlier today I was eating my breakfast (at my breakfast table, of course) when my dad came in and sat down next to me. This was already weird because he never does this. He asked me, “what are you eating?” I said “a boiled egg” (I love boiled ehgs) my dad started flipping out about how this want okay because of his politics.

My dad tends to be extremely extreme. Now that he’s on this “pro life” tip he says I should not eat eggs or meat or anything else with The potential. I just wanted to eat my egg.

My dad reached into the stove top egg pot and Got one egg. He smashed it onto the top of my head, saying I’m a killer or not what I should be in the eyes of life and creation. It didn’t hurt but the steam ruined me (makeup wise) and I just felt embossed with a yolk mess for hair.

So I told my mom “dad just cracked me with an egg” and she told me I should have ate in my room like we talked about. I just thought she would avoid him for egg hitting his child. I’m so embarrassed, I wiped my hair but egg cannot help but remain. I thought my mom would stand up for me.

Now I’m left thinking, did I deserve to be egg hitting by my father?

I made this account just to post this as I dont use use reddit. But I really need third party perspectives.
Im a bartender at a bar with a lot of slots its basically a mini casino so we get a lot of different types of people. Its 18 to enter but 21 to drink

Last night we were pretty packed due to holidays. I was one of two bartenders plus manager plus one barhand and security. Most people were at the machines with only a few at the bar. A woman who has down syndrome came and sat at the bar. She had a kids/toddler toy in her hands it was a little tikes doll. She was playing with it and mumbling to it/herself. She was also smiling to herself like a kid Would. I went up to her to serve her. I asked her how she was and she said her mom came to play slots so she came along to hang at the bar. She asked for an alcoholic drink. I asked to see her ID (routine if anyone looks 30 or under we must card) she was 24 so she could legally drink.

Now I can legally deny to serve anyone If Im not comfortable serving them. I know she was an adult but the doll threw me off and even tho she looked like an adult she was acting “childish”. I wasnt comfortable serving her an alcoholic drink because I felt like even tho she was legal drinking age off my impression of her I felt like she probably shouldnt drink. Especially when the place is packed and there are weird people (mostly guys) and I didnt want anyone to take advantage of her and its a part of my job to make sure our customers are safe, I told her I wasnt comfortable serving her alcohol. She asked why what did I do, I told her I had the right to refuse anyone and I was unsure if she was fit to drink alcohol. As a bartender with 5 years experience I havent seen adults act like she was.
she said she was an adult and over 21. I repeated myself again and she asked me to see the manager. I went to get my manager when I came back her mom was coming over.
My manager talked to them and her mom sorta told me off “Why cant she get a drink? Shes not acting a fool, you have no reason not to serve her. I had to pull away from my machines for this? “. I explained to my manager what happened I told him about the doll and how she was sitting there playing with it and I didnt think she was mentally fit to drink alcohol off of my experience as a bartender.

long story short my manager looked at her, looked at me, talked to her mom for a few seconds then told me to serve her. I apologized to the woman and got her her drink and even offered it on the house for the inconvenience.

After my manager pulled aside and told me that I overreacted to the situation and I should have survived her and how I was lucky he didnt call me out infront of everyone and embarrass me like I did to that woman.

I feel really bad but I thought I was doing the right thing. I dont think I overreacted at all I didnt throw her out of the bar, I simply double checked before serving her.