u/Deanootzplayz

Every time I see some influencer posting their perfect beachside setup I want to throw my phone into the woods. Finding legal overnight parking in New England lately has been an absolute nightmare. Walmarts are cracking down everywhere, and the few spots left are usually packed with massive class A's running their generators all night long

honestly after three nights of terrible sleep in sketchy industrial parks listening to semi trucks, I just gave in and booked a weekend spot at camp happy grounds to reset. Im just so tired of waking up in a cold sweat every time a car drives slowly past my van

It kinda feels like a defeat paying for a site when the whole point was to be free and nomadic, but man... taking a real shower and knowing I won't get "the knock" from a cop at 3am is just what I need right now. anyone else hit this wall where you just need a break from the constant parking anxiety?

so im speccing hardware for a 2400 x 900 solid blackbutt door, probably sitting around 55 to 60kg once its finished and oiled. client wants completely frameless, flush to the wall, no visible hardware at allthe argenta pivotica keeps coming up as the go to for this kind of application but i cant find a clear answer on whether it handles that weight long term without the door dropping over time. ive used heavy duty concealed before and had mixed results with timber movementanyone running the pivotica on doors this size? and if so floor pivot or top and bottom? found the product range but would love actual install experience before i commit the client to it

cheers

my spouse and i never really planned to buy a home we’ve always been more into travel and experiences, but we kept savings aside and eventually decided it made sense to put money into a property instead of continuing to rent long-term.

we bought during a higher price period, which we were aware of at the time. we ran all the usual numbers interest rates, worst-case scenarios, monthly carrying costs and overall it still felt doable based on our situation. what we underestimated was how much complexity sits inside a pre-construction Agreement of Purchase and Sale (APS), and how many costs only really show up closer to closing.

we didn’t have a real estate lawyer go through the contract in detail before signing, and that’s where things started to feel a bit different later on.

we’re now approaching closing and realizing there are a number of additional costs we didn’t fully account for things like development charges, parkland levies, utility connection fees, and other adjustments that aren’t always obvious upfront. altogether it’s coming out to roughly $40k+ on top of standard closing costs like land transfer tax, etc. we originally budgeted around 25–30k for closing and assumed most of it would be fairly predictable, but the structure of the APS turned out to be more open-ended than we expected. in hindsight, even a basic real estate law review before signing would have made a big difference in understanding those clauses properly from the start.

the cost of that review would’ve been small compared to the surprises we’re now dealing with at closing. we’ll manage it, but it definitely changed our financial planning more than we expected.

just sharing this as a PSA for anyone looking at pre-construction:

please get a real estate lawyer to review the APS before signing. make sure you fully understand what’s included, what’s excluded, and what extra costs can show up at closing.

it feels optional until it isn’t.

These calls have been coming to me since weeks now. Various numbers at different times of the day. But the story is the same. They claim that they are either calling from PayPal or from the bank and there seems to be some suspicious activity in my account

But they never pronounce their names properly. This is the first thing that raises a red flag in my mind. I ask who is on the phone, and the other person speaks indistinctly. The name is partly said but not fully pronounced. It is never a surname nor an identification number. Just enough for it to look legitimate, but there is always something suspicious going on

Once, I almost revealed my information, because I was scared. I was shivering from fear and trembling all over my body. Fortunately, I managed to hang up. Right now, I don’t answer calls with unknown numbers

I just want to be able to pick up the phone without fear. Is that asking too much? Have you been through this? How do you cope? I always feel like someone is watching me in my own house

It feels like my ex is contesting every single detail just to push my legal fees until I can't afford my lawyer anymore. It’s so exhausting to deal with these financial tactics.

We are currently thinking about using JustFund New Zealand to cover the upcoming legal invoices until the final property settlement is done, just so we can actually stay in the fight and level the playing field.

Has anyone here used them before? Would love to hear any experiences or advice on dealing with this level of financial stress during a separation.

Ruptured my left Achilles in March, slipped on wet decking in the backyard, classic. I'm 64 so recovery is slower than I'd like. Was in a boot for 6 weeks, then told to start weight bearing. That's where it got hard.

The swelling comes and goes, worse by end of day. Mornings I'm stiff for about 40 minutes before I can move properly. Walking distance is maybe 200 metres before the tendon feels tight and sore. Stairs are fine going up, awful going down.

Picked up a brace from Support Brace a few weeks back, which has helped with stability during the day, especially on uneven ground. Still not confident without it.

What I can't figure out is whether the tightness at week 8 is normal healing or something to flag with the physio. And how long before you felt steady walking on grass or uneven surfaces again?

Running a commercial cleaning business in Australia for almost 3 years now. Started with just me and a mate doing offices and retail spaces after hours. First year was rough we barely scraped 65k revenue after all the fuel and supplies but we landed a couple steady contracts with local shops and a small medical centre last year and pushed it up to 185k total. Profits weren't crazy but around 55k before tax which let me actually pay myself a proper wage instead of scraping by.

Lately though its getting frustrating, our two vans are old as hell and breaking down at the worst times costing us jobs and reputation plus clients want more eco friendly gear and better machines for deep cleans which ain't cheap. I've got a solid opportunity to bid on a bigger school contract but without reliable transport and upgraded equipment i know we'll miss out.

Thinking hard about taking a business loan to sort this properly maybe 50-60k for a decent van and some new vacuums plus buffers. I'd rather not but feels like the only way to scale without stalling for another year. Banks always make it sound impossible for small outfits like mine with endless forms and questions, still weighing the interest costs against the extra contracts it could bring in.

Has anyone here in service businesses like cleaning trades or maintenance used a loan to upgrade gear or vehicles? Appreciate any advice, this decision feels big for where we're at.

honestly I used to be one of those toxic productivity guys. waking up at 4:30, working 12 hours straight, running on cold brew and pure anxiety. I genuinely thought I was killing it but my body was literally falling apart

Its wild how your physical health just mirrors your mental state when you hit severe burnout. I gained weight, my posture was wrecked from hunching over a screen, and the chronic stress basically ruined my scalp. I was so fixated on my "goals" that I couldn't even be bothered to take a proper shower most days. just quick 2-minute rinses so I could get back to my desk

The turning point was just catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror and looking completely exhausted and gross. I decided to drop all the crazy morning routine optimization garbage and just focus on basic human maintenance. like actually sleeping 8 hours. drinking water instead of energy drinks. Grabbing a standard anti dandruff shampoo with tea tree to deal with the gross stress flakes I was ignoring. just doing the bare minimum to feel like a functioning person again

tbh its humbling. we spend so much time trying to life-hack our way to success on the internet while completely ignoring the absolute basics of just taking care of ourselves. Trying to unlearn the mindset that basic hygiene and rest is a "waste of time" is gonna take a while ngl

Custom kitchen job.

Floor-to-ceiling MDF panels for integrated fridge and a bunch of appliance cupboards. These things are chunky and heavy. Normal hinges sag after six months and then you're scraping the floor and adjusting every second week.

I've been looking at heavy-duty concealed options but I'm not convinced generic soft-close is gonna cut it. Keen to hear what the cabinet makers here actually trust for the heavy stuff. Also, how many hinges per door are you running? I've heard three is the magic number but honestly feels like overkill. Or maybe not

With Norway Chess 2026 wrapping up and so many great games to go through, I started wondering how much casual and club players actually get from following elite tournaments closely.

I've been replaying the games from this tournament, trying to understand the ideas behind the moves rather than just watching the highlights. But honestly, the positions these guys reach sometimes feel so far above my level that the lessons don't transfer when I sit down for my own games.

At the same time, I've heard a lot of players say that exposure to highlevel chess, even without fully understanding it, gradually shapes your intuition over time. Magnus, Pragg, Gukesh and the others produce some genuinely creative moments that make you think differently about the pieces.

So I'm curious what the community thinks. Do you actively study games from events like Norway Chess with a board and engine, or do you mostly follow for the entertainment and storylines? Has there been a specific game or idea from a top tournament that you can point to and say it directly changed how you approach your own chess? Would love to hear what methods people use to actually extract practical value from watching elitelevel play.

Hey everyone. Throwaway account for obvious reasons, but I’m in a really rough spot right now and could use some genuine, personal recommendations for a divorce and child custody lawyer around the Aurora / metro area. (Ideally someone who knows their way around the Arapahoe County court system).

My head is completely spinning from scrolling through Google and Yelp reviews for the last week. It’s impossible to tell what’s real anymore... literally every single firm has one review saying they’re absolute saints and the very next one screaming that they completely ruined their life and stole their money +my biggest fear right now is getting locked into a contract with some aggressive firm that’s just going to drag the process out to bleed me dry while I end up doing half the actual paperwork anyway. Been staying up until 2 AM trying to read up on everything so I don't get completely screwed. I need to know how these people actually treat a regular person going through hell.

Does anyone here have a personal recommendation for an attorney who communicates, returns phone calls, and won't just look at me like a walking wallet? I just need someone straightforward, empathetic, and honest who will look out for my kids. Appreciate any info (or even warnings on who to completely avoid). Thanks guys.

was trying to clear some space on my phone because it's completely full, and i spent the last hour looking through my camera roll. it’s actually embarrassing. i have literally dozens of photos from last weekend where i'm standing in the exact same spot, making the exact same face, just trying to get the angle right. I kept switching between the regular camera, then trying out the portrait mode, then messing with the lighting in editing tools on apps just to see if i could fix the weird shadow on my nose. after all that work, i didn't even end up posting any of them anyway.
it’s kind of funny how much effort goes into making a photo look like a "casual, candid" moment when in reality it took twenty minutes of standing there like a statue. in the end i just gave up and kept a blurry picture my friend took of me laughing while eating a taco. it's objectively a terrible photo, but at least it actually looks like me having fun instead of a mannequin.

I feel like 5 years ago if you wanted "nice" skincare you had to go European or Korean. Now there are so many local brands doing genuinely beautiful stuff with native botanicals and the packaging is actually gorgeous??

Been down a rabbit hole lately, found a hand and body that uses things like lilly pilly and flannel flower and buddha wood and honestly the scents are unlike anything I've smelled from an overseas brand. It doesn't try to smell "European" it just smells like… here? Hard to explain.

What local Australian brands are you into right now that you feel like don't get enough attention?

Trying to avoid last-minute skincare mistakes.

I’ve started looking into more professional options and recently booked with clinic, mostly for healthier-looking skin and texture.

For brides here - what actually worked for you before the big day?

im running a small supplement brand. just launched like 2 months ago everyone told me facebook ads are the way to go so i saved up and went for it. did my research, watched a bunch of youtube tutorials, thought i had decent creatives.

500 later i got 2 sales. two. and my instagram went from 0 to 12 followers lol. feels like i just burned that money for nothing.

a buddy of mine who runs a clothing brand said i shouldve focused on social proof first before ads. he said nobody buys from a page that looks dead. he used something early on just to get some numbers on his profile so people would actually trust him. then his ads started converting better.

i dont know maybe he's right. ads dont work if people click and see 12 followers they just bounce. feels like social media is designed to make you spend money on ads and then spend more money to look legit. kinda rigged if you ask me.

anyway back to the drawing board i guess.

anyone else had this experience with early stage ads? or am i just doing something obviously wrong.

opened my laptop to finish one simple spreadsheet. should’ve taken around 20 minutes.

Instead I somehow ended up reading about probability....then old board games, then watching a guy passionately explain casino dice mechanics, and then messing around on dice online rollers ‘just to see patterns’.

and this is exactly why remote work is weird for me. There’s no external structure pulling me back, just me, 14 tabs open, cold coffee, and a spreadsheet still untouched.

I feel like my brain will do anything except the task I actually planned. Has anyone found ways to gently interrupt this kind of spiraling without relying on pure willpower?

There is something magical about eating leftover Indian food, especially after it has spent a night in the fridge. I made a massive pot of Chole Bhature yesterday, and while it was great fresh, having the leftovers for lunch today was a completely different experience. The gravy got thicker, the spices actually settled into the chickpeas, and that slight tanginess from the amchur really started to pop. It feels like the flavors finally "married" overnight. I’ve noticed the same thing with Sarson ka Saag and even a basic Masoor Dal, they just hit harder on day two.

I’ve noticed that when things get intense emotionally, my creativity just… disappears.

Not gradually, just gone.

I want to make things, but it feels like there’s a wall between me and it.

Does that happen to anyone else? And if so, how do you ease back into creating?

I started with some basic presets just to see how things behave. Now I’m thinking about going more manual, but it feels like there are so many settings that can affect stability. I don’t want to randomly change things without understanding what they do. Do most of you build everything from scratch, or use presets and fine-tune from there?