u/Fuzzy_Breadfruit59

Schießt einfach Random aufs Tor und zerstört Brasilien

Was zum Teufel passiert da?!?!?

The post that got deleted earlier could have been written 1:1 by her. Insults, humiliation, made-up stories. It sent shivers down my spine when I read that post, but you have to give them one thing: They always instantly know which accusations and insults will hurt the other person the most. It seems like some kind of natural talent for humiliating others.

But that’s beside the point. You know what I find even worse? People who try to sugarcoat this kind of behavior, show understanding for abusive actions, and support these people with their toxic behavior. That’s actually the main reason why they often get away with it without consequences.

I could also go around telling everyone that my father was violent, so it’s totally understandable if I’m violent towards others, right?

I don’t think so.

This was sent to me privately. I thought you guys might find it interesting too. This person explains their perspective on things, which in my opinion gives a very insightful look into their inner world.

I’m always trying to analyse things to my therapist. Blabbing on about attachment theory and the psychology of women, trying to wade through the emotional wreckage of my last relationship. English isn’t her first language so she often says to me through a very thick accent the phrase “forget the theory”. So for a minute let’s forget the theory.

Psychology has this theory that what I experience as love is actually some kind of toxic neurochemical reaction like a poison or a drug. They call it love bombing, intensity, insecure attachment and so many other dirty sounding words are included in the pathology of our attachment. But forget the pathology, forget the theories.

This is how I experience love. And though it may be fleeting every time it is beautiful.. great highs giveaway to great lows, this is one of the most wholesome things that I could say about this relationship and this disorder. Every single romantic engagement I’ve ever been in has been intense. I always pick beautiful women who are way out of my league. And of course it never works out, but only because I just become insanely insecure. Subsequently I’ve gotten to love many times. And I’m grateful for that

What stands out to me in the text is the following: These individuals are capable of self-reflection. In this case, they even know the technical terms that describe their behavior but they perceive them as „dirty words“ There is self-reflection, but no real sense of responsibility for their own actions. Instead, they quickly return to the victim role.

After that, their own toxic behavior gets romanticized and glorified. They talk about how amazing these extreme emotions are, and even though all their „relationships“ fail, they still see them as wonderful experiences.

These women that this person keeps choosing are nothing more than a means to an end. They aren’t even described as real people, let alone is their perspective ever considered. They just get replaced again and again. There’s not a single word about the people who had to go through this with them. No sympathy or empathy just the desire to experience this high again and again, and gratitude for these „experiences“.

Der Portugiese hat den Ball doch nach dem Kopfball noch berührt?

Im ersten KO-Spiel die Taktik und Herangehensweise zu ändern und gegen England so hoch zu pressen hat sie richtig kalt erwischt.

So einen Trainer wünscht man sich doch. Je nach Gegner flexibel und immer für eine Überraschung gut.

Some of us sometimes wonder whether people with BPD are actually aware of the kind of behavior they display. I’ve been asking myself that too, because looking back, I noticed a specific pattern with my ex:

From the very beginning, she tried to prevent me from talking to others about our relationship.
During the lovebombing phase, her argument was that it would be more reasonable if we solved our problems between the two of us which I actually thought was sensible at the time.

Even after the monkey branching, splitting, the worst insults, sending proof photos of her sleeping with other men, and statements like „You were just a distraction and it gives me pleasure to hurt you“, it was still incredibly important to her that I didn’t talk to anyone else about it.

When I finally had the courage to tell various people about her behavior, the insults, etc., her reaction wasn’t to apologize. Instead, she tried to guilt-trip me again, saying it would be unfair to tell other people about her actions. Even though she had cheated on me and insulted me horribly, it was supposedly still „a matter between us“.

Doesn’t that actually mean, on the flip side, that she was at least aware that her behavior wouldn’t be viewed positively by others and that she would face criticism? That’s why she constantly tried to isolate me. It suggests that she knew she was going way too far even though she never apologized.

Have any of you noticed something similar? How do you interpret this behavior? Can we really say that people with BPD are not aware that their actions are seen as problematic, even though they try to convince themselves that their behavior is justified?

Was soll man dazu noch sagen 🤣

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