u/laminated-papertowel

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I've been diagnosed with DID and in treatment for it for 3 years. Before my diagnosis, my parts were very distinct. we didn't have good internal cooperation or understanding, but awareness and some communication was present.

Shortly after my diagnosis and early on in treatment, I found stability. My comorbid mood disorder was finally being appropriately and effectively treated, I was no longer living in active abuse, and I had learned a good amount of coping skills to help me get through.

After reaching stability, there was a significant shift in my system; I went from switching multiple times a day to maybe once a week, most of my parts went dormant, and I experienced at least one significant fusion. With these changes came even more stability, as well as improvement in my functioning and quality of life.

But also came the quiet. and I was fine with the quiet for quite a while; I was doing well so it wasn't a bother.

Come last October, I split a new part after months of continuous and immense stress. When this split occurred, I had lost all communication and connection to the rest of my system. I had also lost all sense of identity and connection to myself and my life. and that's when the quiet really started getting to me.

it's hard to explain, but when I had more active parts, I felt less alone. And I know it's not healthy, but I miss that.

I don't miss the dysfunction, but I do miss the noise.

I'm at 22 right now. how's it looking for you?

I was properly diagnosed with bipolar 1 when I was 19, but struggled significantly with hypomania since 16 and depression since 6.

a lot of the time when I find myself reading about bipolar disorder, I end up crying. not a lot, just a bit. it happens if i think too hard about it too.

it's just so overwhelming I guess, the reminders. needing to be on meds for the rest of my life, knowing that my meds will stop working eventually, the terrifying idea of finding myself in another mixed episode, remembering all the pain and grief this condition has caused me. it breaks my heart that this is something that I really truly struggle with and will for the rest of my life.

I was properly diagnosed with bipolar 1 when I was 19, but struggled significantly with hypomania since 16 and depression since 6.

a lot of the time when I find myself reading about bipolar disorder, I end up crying. not a lot, just a bit. it happens if i think too hard about it too.

it's just so overwhelming I guess, the reminders. needing to be on meds for the rest of my life, knowing that my meds will stop working eventually, the terrifying idea of finding myself in another mixed episode, remembering all the pain and grief this condition has caused me. it breaks my heart that this is something that I really truly struggle with and will for the rest of my life.

I started psych meds when I was 14, and over several years I tried a bunch of different meds that didn't work. It wasn't till i was 19 that I found a med that actually worked for me. When I finally got on the right meds, everything changed. It completely got rid of my depression and mania, and i had no side effects. It was great, i was finally "normal" and actually felt happy to be alive.

I'm 22 now and have had to up my dosage twice in the last few years because the meds stopped being as effective. I'm currently on the highest effective dose of my meds, and I know it's just a matter of time before they stop working again. and I'm terrified.

when my meds stop working, it gets bad, REALLY Bad. I'm truly afraid it would kill me. it feels like it's just a matter of time before I crash and burn. this has made it really hard for me to make any kind of progress in my life.

I know there are other meds I haven't tried that could be as effective as the ones I'm currently on. but I'm honestly not hopeful about it. everything else I've tried has made things so much worse, I just have a hard time believing anything else could help me like this.

I started psych meds when I was 14, and over several years I tried a bunch of different meds that didn't work. It wasn't till i was 19 that I found a med that actually worked for me. When I finally got on the right meds, everything changed. It completely got rid of my depression and mania, and i had no side effects. It was great, i was finally "normal" and actually felt happy to be alive.

I'm 22 now and have had to up my dosage twice in the last few years because the meds stopped being as effective. I'm currently on the highest effective dose of my meds, and I know it's just a matter of time before they stop working again. and I'm terrified.

when my meds stop working, it gets bad, REALLY Bad. I'm truly afraid it would kill me. it feels like it's just a matter of time before I crash and burn. this has made it really hard for me to make any kind of progress in my life.

I know there are other meds I haven't tried that could be as effective as the ones I'm currently on. but I'm honestly not hopeful about it. everything else I've tried has made things so much worse, I just have a hard time believing anything else could help me like this.

I (22m) had an autism assessment a few weeks ago and just got the results back and I am most definitely autistic. I know most autistic people get diagnosed as kids, so I wanted to share my experiences as a newly diagnosed adult.

like how someone chugs a beverage, drinks it as fast as they can. is there a term for burning through a joint/bowl as fast as you can, hit after hit?