u/AirMassive5414

like why didn't he just tell the truth directly instead of hiding it ? it's not like he did anything wrong, he has nothing to hide.

+ nacho isn't his problem so he has no reasons to hide this

like each time I do something, I realize that I'm very bad at it for example + I was bullied a lot because I had a weird behavior and it happens even today.

Anyways, I don't want to do the AW but I hate myself deeply and I think I don't like anyone (except one person)

I just think that this self hatred will never go away, like each time I feel confident, I need one little thing to start hating myself again. I tried to change and each time I thought I did, it never worked out and that it's in my core to be weak.

like it's like with natural selection, weak animals get killed and humiliated, lions usually attack other weaker male lion and then kill the male lion to stole the wife and rape female lion. he also kill the children of the weaker male lion too

like what I mean is that it's the same with humans. there are the alphas and the garbage and I will even say that we need the garbage one so that the alphas are truly alphas like for example someone who is rich because of hard working will be proud of himself but it's because poor people and people who are rich thanks to their parents exist, if they did not exist, he would never be proud of himself

anyway I'm sick of humanity

like with almost all the survivors, they have some major role like wenona and diana are support and jett had a character development after mark death

but grace had like no leaks about her. I'm curious about her hypothetical role

like I saw some people did jokes so I start saying jokes too to fit in but I think my jokes were too much so they probably dislike me for that.

but if I don't do jokes, I think they will view me as a boring person too

my PR strategy didn't work, I can't be myself because I have no real personality so I just try to do what people would like or find funny or idk, it's probably the reason why I pushed people away

like I thought after newman death that butcher clearly turned evil and that the boys is over.

but then they forgive him because he start becoming "nice" again but then in episode 4, he clearly betrayed all the boys because he wanted to destroy the v1 and let starlight and kimiko dying.

also kimiko and frenchie let sameer go despite the fact that he is the main person who created the virus. so it's a betrayal against butcher

all the boys fought each other and hughie shot M.M but still even if it's because of the rage virus, I thought that the team was clearly destroyed and that no one will ever trust each other. I thought it was the point of episode 4, to ruin the team.

but in episode 5, UE just had to talk about becca to convince butcher that he will leave V1 for kimiko and starlight. and everyone seem to tolerate and love each other.

I just don't know anymore if butcher is a villain and I don't understand if the team will rip each other apart or if they will be friends until the last episode.

like the title of episode 7 heavily implies that frenchie, MM and kimiko are going to die. but I guess, it's homelander who will get them and not butcher.

I will never forgive that person, that person stole my soul and everything good inside me is now gone. I just want to * him and * his corpse.

I want that person to suffer so much, I hope they all burn in hell.

I don't know if it's possible to change and find peace but I can't. I hate myself so much, the only way I can find my esteem back is revenge

they are probably better without me, It's perfect, I was always too much so I'm gonna avoid every person I know now. and be extremely cold

I'm sick of people, do I make the good decision ? because I feel like it is the best one I can do

I know that they like me etc. but It's just useless, I always like them but idk why I want to avoid them then