u/CromwellsCrumb

I met this woman about a year ago at a group mom walk. We went on several group walks together then split off and did some walks just the two of us (with our kids, who are about 14mo apart). We also took our kids to the zoo together, and to the playground, and on a hike.

From fall 2025 to late spring 2026, we saw each other at least every month, sometimes every other week. Then it started getting hot. Suddenly, I stopped hearing from her. We chatted a couple times but it was mostly radio silence throughout the summer.

I just ran into her yesterday and we got to talking for a long time and it felt like nothing had changed. I said “omg, it has been forever! Why haven’t I seen you all summer?” And she said “Honestly….ok, it’s not a big deal so you don’t have to feel bad about it, but you said something rude last time I saw you.”

I said “Oh gosh, I’m so sorry…I don’t even remember what happened, what did I say?

She said “Well, you said you wouldn’t be caught dead in what I was wearing and I thought that was pretty snotty.”

Wait….I do totally remember that interaction and that is NOT what I said.

The last time I saw her was our first hot day. I’m plus-sized and hate wearing shorts because they always ride up on me and make my thighs chafe, unless they’re bicycle shorts, which are fine for the gym or for going hiking, but not very flattering on me.

So whenever the weather hits 70+ I pretty much live in sundresses with knee-length anti-chafe shorts underneath. That is my summertime uniform.

She said “Oh you look so cute in your dress!” And I said “Thank you! It’s really the only way for me to stay comfortable now that it’s getting hot, you won’t catch me dead in anything else all summer.”

I was not commenting on her clothes at all! It was just about me and my comfort preferences, but she interpreted that as me saying I wouldn’t be caught dead in what she was wearing??

I explained this to her and she accepted it but didn’t seem to believe me, she just wanted to put it behind us and forget it ever happened.

I feel so bad because I really have a hard time making friends, I’m extremely introverted and never put myself out there and only started going to these mom groups so my daughter would have some socialization. It was a big step for me. So I felt like I had finally made a local friend only to scare her off with a comment that I never intended to be taken as criticism or snootiness. And all summer, I had no idea!

It makes me think….what other things have I said that came across the wrong way and turned people off me? I have been told before that I give off “unapproachable” vibes but that’s absolutely not the kind of person I feel like I am or want to be.

Here is what I know about her:

•She is a heavy cigarette smoker and always smokes while sitting in her walker on her front porch (so maybe something to make her smoke breaks more comfortable?)

•Her parents were immigrants from Guam and she seems to value her heritage and traditional food

That’s pretty much it.

Her children have said she’s difficult to shop for and said I don’t need to worry about getting her a gift, but I feel like she should have something for such a big milestone birthday, even if it’s just a gift card or a carton of cigarettes or something. (Personally, I hate cigarettes and would normally never dream of giving them as a gift, but the woman is 75 and I’m not going to judge her lifestyle choices at this point.)

Edit: Budget of $50 and her party is on the 17th

So far, I’ve got….

Arlo

Liam

Noah

Jack

Owen

Luke

Levi

Milo

Ezra

Beau

Luca

Joel

Noel

Colt (though that’s really more of a nn for Colton)

Also while wrangling a 16mo who is running on fistfuls of blueberries and 5 hours of sleep. Thank God my husband was able to walk her down for a nap so I can suffer in silence for a bit. I never had any nausea with my first, so this all-day-every-day queasiness is really getting to me. And the SMELL in here. My god. I have been on hundreds of flights and never experienced this before.

Back in the day, my sister and I fit two suitcases, a carry-on suitcase, and the two of us in a Miata. I had a suitcase in my lap for 40 minutes, but it worked.

Wondering whether to pay the extra $175 to rent an SUV instead, or give it a try with the Honda Fit.

EDIT: Y'all are making me want to BUY a Fit now.

We have a very long last name so we would like for it to be a short first name, preferably two syllables or less.

We’re looking for some other ideas that fit the vibe of the names below. Thanks in advance!

Names we love, but vetoed because of length 😢

•Llewelyn

•Theodosia

•Sebastian

Names up for consideration

Boys

•Audie

•Ansel

•Dacre

•Shea

•Welles

•Finley

•Henry

•Arlo

Girls

•Tova

•Cleo

•Cecily (still feels a bit long at three syllables, but it’s a family name)

My OB says she is leaving it up to my discretion. She says she has other patients who take it, but only because they felt they physically cannot function without it.

Well, I was only diagnosed a year ago at age 33 so I had been functioning well enough without it all this time….but it’s like night and day since I’ve been on it. I feel like I’m finally living and thriving instead of just functioning, and I’m really not looking forward to the idea of going without it, especially now that I am newly pregnant and with a 2 year old as well.

I had Hashi during my first pregnancy, but I was only on a low 25mg Levo dose. Felt absolutely great. I gained a bit of weight, as you do, but nothing substantial.

After I gave birth, my endo had me stop levo entirely to “see if I still needed it” which, now looking back, seems very strange to me because I had already been diagnosed before the pregnancy so why wouldn’t I still need it? But my weight absolutely SHOT up and my levels were all over the place. I gained more weight after giving birth than I ever did while pregnant.

When I went back in 6mo later, she was like “What have you been doing???” in regard to my shocking weight gain, which offended me deeply because I was doing nothing differently, except I was no longer taking my Levo, at her direction.

She put me back on Levo and upped it to 75mg, then 88mg, and still my weight kept creeping up. I work out 5x/week in the gym and do yoga on the weekends. I follow a nutritionist’s recommended diet. Nothing seems to be helping.

Eventually, I lost faith in her care so I switched endos and the new one prescribed me a GLP-1. On the day I was set to pick it up from the pharmacy, I learned I am pregnant again.

My husband and I are very happy and excited about the new baby, but I’m only 6 weeks along and this is already a much different experience than my first pregnancy. I’m starting this pregnancy 70lbs heavier than my first one and it already feels so uncomfortable. My feet already have that tight, swollen feel they did in the third trimester last time. I worry about the impact the additional weight will have on the baby.

I don’t really have a point to this post, just getting some things off my shoulders.

We have a 16mo who will be turning two within weeks of when this new baby will be born.

Just wondering how you handle bedtime solo, because it's hard for me to even imagine it and I feel like I need to start wrapping my head around it NOW, when I have so much time to prepare.

Edit: Thanks, all! I’ll send her something from her registry.

——————

This is an old family friend. She was my little sister’s best friend growing up (though they are not close now - no big blow up or anything, they just grew apart) and her mother is still one of my mother’s best friends.

They live across the country so I haven’t seen either her or her mother in many, many years, but I invited them both to my baby shower two years ago. Or rather, my mother invited them as she was the one throwing it and I didn’t have a problem with it.

Neither of them came, but both sent gifts.

Now the daughter is pregnant and her mother is throwing a baby shower. My mom was invited, but I was not. My mom asked what I was going to send her, and I pointed out that I hadn’t been invited so I wasn’t planning to send anything, but she thinks I should anyway just out of gratitude for the things they sent two years ago.

Wondering what others thought of this. Thanks in advance!

6 full days and 2 travel days (arriving 11am and departing 3pm)

I hear the east is best for hiking, which is where we would normally go. But with our 1yo on our backs, I think 6mi is now our upper limit.

Bummed we will have to miss Grinnell Glacier, but I just don’t think we can manage 10mi with that elevation gain with her in tow.

Best views accessible for us on trails 6mi or less?

Thanks in advance!

Edit: this will be last week of August into first week of September

Just found out I’m pregnant, haven’t even told my husband yet. I feel so nervous, not at all instantly happy like I was with my first. Our daughter is 15mo and we have always known we wanted a second, but our plan was to space them 3-4 years apart.

Based on the date I assume we conceived, this child will be born within weeks of our first’s 2nd birthday.

I feel like I’m just now starting to get the hang of it all, so the thought of starting all over (now with a small toddler in tow as well) feels so daunting.

We can financially afford it. Our families are supportive and involved. This will be a wonderful thing for us….I just didn’t expect it to happen so soon.

Tell me everything will be okay, please! Tell me how your two under two are best buddies and it’s a joy to have them so close in age!

Just found out I’m pregnant, haven’t even told my husband yet. I feel so nervous, not at all instantly happy like I was with my first. Our daughter is 15mo and we have always known we wanted a second, but our plan was to space them 4 years apart like my sister and I are.

Based on date I assume we conceived, this child will be born within weeks of our first’s 2nd birthday.

I feel like I’m just now starting to get the hang of all of this so the thought of starting all over, now with a small toddler in tow as well, feels so daunting.

We can financially afford it. Our families are supportive and involved. This will be a wonderful thing for us….I just didn’t expect it to happen so soon.

Tell me everything will be okay, please! Tell me how your two under two are best buddies and it’s a joy to have them so close in age!

Inspired by a New Yorker article, The Bridge (2006) is a controversial documentary by Eric Steel that filmed the Golden Gate Bridge for a year, capturing 23 of the 24 suicides that occurred there in 2004. The film uses footage of the actual jumps, often from a distance, combined with personal accounts from families, friends, and survivors to explore the tragedy. 

My formerly fishy girl spent a week away from the pool and now suddenly doesn’t want anything to do with it.

She’s always been such an adventurous eater but I’m wondering if/when that might suddenly change overnight as well!