u/MeansWelll

Essentially we are influenced and adapt to the surroundings we live in side of in this reality. Whether you are in a dense city or live in the middle of the woods, for ages there were 0 houses for a lot of life especially humans. So as humans got to the tipping point..

The Primal language qe all grew up in slowly started being disrupted by technology. Kind of like...

I have a car, yet the more I use the car the less I use my own strength to get to where I need to be. So, there is a trade off, fast speed means less strength over time, the more you want to drive the less time there is to work out your body.

So now apply this to anything or any form of technology where... like glasses, or phones or pencils or mail. What ever.

As time went on, languages split into hundreds and now it is almost like a lot of people living in modern homes have taken the free time traded for these cheats in energy and transfered that energy into imagination. Almost like... you have a family in a house with no rooms, only 1 room, everyone always sees each other all the time, so you can only really think when you are by yourself isolated.

It's like, some houses were made for families to stay together vs families to drift apart. I always see people in India or Mexico and Asian cultures where they live together they look out for each other up until they die but in the USA it's like... so many families are convinced they need their own spaces because they're too ashamed of themselves to express themselves freely around their own family? Which then turns into this cycle where people see this and make households and families where things are all together and everyone is living together all the time and not shameful about being themselves and turns into a strong family like someone brought the blessing of freedom finally to a family that grew strong but then these people die and the understanding of how that strong free family came to be in the first place.

It's like the world around us is tangled with people who are convincing others to be isolated and free and then the opposite. Especially In the military where you are taught to not stick out from the crowd. But there's such a spectrum of mental states in between these two realities. Like if Black and White were mixing and becoming grey but then grey wanted black and white to just stop causing so much friction and calm down so we can all be at peace again and like who do so many people gotta die for literally what seems like no reason, where is the honor?

But I get it, free will is not a holy angel particularly.

White being Consciousness and Black being Time.

Kind of like they're in an hourglass or 2 liquids with different viscosities and the flat piece where they are at in the middle has so much friction that we are essentially just Black and White mixing so much it inverts like some bubble.

And the only way to actually reach full peace or rest is to equalize them both into one giant Grey blob but if that happened then it would just cause a super giant blackhole that flips reality inside out. Kind of weird if you consider the entirety of the rainbow is born out from grey. Black and White colliding.

Imagine, once there was a strong brother hood like Time and Consciousness were these two liquids of different vescocities. Like Water and Oil.

Then someone shakes this, hour glass?

Now Consciousness becomes mixed with Time. Bubbles form and in these bubbles are inversions of reality, places like the universe we live in.

So let's say Earth forms and after a very long time evolution happens and there are caveman and these cavemen and cavewomen start developing language and language gets to a point where it's almost like people are aware of Consciousness and Time being mixed together and in the middle, Purgatory or grey is where we are and maybe... its like a Wound that is trying to heal and the more life's perception of language broadens away from how primal life understood each other. There becomes this gap or gradient in language that should be maintained or else all of history becomes lost.

What if we are about to let go of a holy language that's trying to hold onto us but technology has made a lot of us step out of The Allegory of The Cave, almost like a lot of smaller languages were developed for us to put back into this primal language and then that is kind of like... the answer to all suffering? Like the ones we love that are gone forever, maybe their Consciousness is still here around us, and life gets very close to creating peace forever, and in doing so it makes strong families and important figures in these families die, people look back onto those older people's honor and try to respect it and pass it down their lineage then kids get treated badly eventually where it's like.. "Oh you should have been more like these people" then strict parents make sneaky kids which then after a given period of time these kids that were sneaky were just drifting away from a sacred language, then redevelop and eventually make another family then it just keeps happening until Black and White or Consciousness and Time settle and the Grey in the middle either heals as the wound or the whole hour glass just turns grey?

Like.. what if we are just this thermal paste in the middle of Consciousness and Time and we are here to stop the pattern of Black and Whites friction creating Grey by turning everything Grey which then will make reality invert back into normal reality..

Kind of like ripples and tracing the reflections of these ripples so like... say every form of life is emitting these waves or frequencies and if you can equal out what ever s wave you run into then it's like the reflections that would have been actually turn into the moments you finally understand something else's perspective in the reality around us? Like the moment you Truly mock and speak something else's language is the moment you truly understand it and there's so many languages around us.

Idk wtf I'm even talking about anymore...

So my girlfriend and I have known each other since 2020. We went on a date, she wanted me to take her virginity, but in my gut it didn't feel right. A few years later she is dating another guy and then she starts texting me flirting with me, so I tell her boyfriend at the time. He gets her pregnant, but thinks I am the one that got her pregnant. Nope it was his kid. So he cheats on her, then they break up, huge squabble, they try to fix things but then they have another kid, they break up again and the dude tells her to talk to me like to be in a relationship with me. He is convinced the kids aren't his, even though I've never actually penetrated her before at this point.

So she hits me up, around the middle in between where she had her first kid and was pregnant with her 2nd, I try to be there for her and comfort her because it's an awful thing to be cheated on, but at the same time.. she is an asshole to me for no reason very often... when I am in a relationship usually my partner and I are the highlights of each others day when we are stressed out. So I just felt disrespected and broke things off with her until she gave birth to the kid and then I started talking to her again. She does this thing where she like... wants to use me to make her baby daddy feel jealous that I am with her, saying things like oh go with me to Walmart to meet my ex to show him what's up. But then she tells me that after she found out she was pregnant with his 2nd kid, she slept with one of his close friends he worked with to get back at him for him cheating on her. I'm like.. okay? That's a little odd..

She lives 1 town away and is in the process of trying to get childsupport from him, he seems to actually really be struggling very hard with his new girlfriend. My girlfriend is always complaining to me about how her ex is treating her so badly, but I'm like.. its obviously because you are chasing him for childsupport and just from the time I've known her, she is actually an asshole for no reason some times. If you play a niave sort of mindset like no one knows everything, but there are things, small things you can say and she just kind of snaps and thinks you are stupid and makes you feel stupid, like shaming I guess?

During this entire time, every time I have made contact with her and we've been texting she has always told me that she really deeply wants to be with me, she wants things to work out correctly. While I am here listening to her explain how horrible of a father this dude is and it just made me sad because recently I had childhood friends pass away from drug overdoses.. and also my father was never around when I was a kid, and the boyfriend my mom did have when we were kids... well they would fight very often and it caused a lot of trauma for my brothers and I.. so I was thinking, I'd like to step up and sort of be a father figure to this kids if that is okay with her, like obviously we are going be taking things slowly, I'm not trying to kick their actual father out of the picture or nothing but now I am starting to seriously regret expressing these emotions towards her for how she has been treating me lately...

I asked her to be my girlfriend at the beginning of this month, on the 8th. Things were going well, but she was not visiting me often, and I'm in a bad situation at the moment where I have a bad neck injury and shoulder injury. I'm working heavily with a Healthcare team and they got me a lawyer to help me apply for Disability. Right now it's just kind of rough because my car broke and I'm just stuck here waiting and praying I get disability. She has been very kind to visit me maybe 2 times since June 19th, my birthday. The thing is, when we depend on texting each other all the time it is like I can tell she doesn't really care about me, like I feel very heavily pushed to the side. It feels like an imbalance, for example she will do small things that iritate me like she wanted to watch all of the hunger game movies with me before the new one comes out, i told her i was very excited about watching them with her, then yesterday she asks what im doing, i said just working on music as usual, so I ask back and she tells me she's watching the hunger games movies, I kind of get upset and tell her why is she watching them without me when we had agreed to watch them together? She didn't understand why I was upset. Every time I feel like she sort of disrespects me in a way it's like she tries flipping it onto me and so then I feel pressured to apologize for literally just feeling how someone would feel if you were like neglecting them or offend them and I said okay what ever, I get it have video games that i play over and over too I get it, it's a boredom thing. So I asked her to hang out. We hung out, made out, watched a movie and I met her baby and what not, twice actually. And Each time we hang out it's like the issues we have in our texts just 100% go away, the way she texts me changes, she texts me more frequently after we meet up and what not, but then slowly it just goes back to normal..

So in the past couple of days, it's like.. she is just taking so soooo long to respond, longer than she should. So I start spiraling down and get worried, like usually she sends me lots of tiktoks or reels, she hasn't sent me anything like that since the last time we hung out. I try sending her things, she leaves them on read. I try bring flirty with her, she doesn't really respond how I'd think she usually would. So I really start spiraling down sending long texts, I tell her that I want to get my car fixed so I can start going down there to visit her instead of her having to come up here all the time, she agrees.

But it feels like every time I mention wanting to get to know her family is when things feel like we create distance. I see her with her family all the time, they genuinely seem like happy people, I tell her I'd like to meet them one day, I love meeting new people and getting to know people etc.. she doesn't respond. So then I say I'm sorry for sending so many texts I think it's my ADHD meds making me hyper. So I tell her I'm going to really work on taking my meds like I should be so I chill out, when in reality I feel like her lack of committing with me is making me worried and I'm trying to feel reassured but there is nothing from her.

Usually she responds saying good morning each day, she has for the past 2 weeks. But last night I asked her for the second time if in these moments I feel like I'm spiraling out, can we just call so i can hear her voice and maybe that will just calm me down because there is so much context lost in lack of tone through just texting. She told me that I can call her anytime, I told her I'm sorry if I'm being too much and good night. Today she hasn't texted me at all though like she usually does, and I sent her a text but no response.. it is really making me feel pushed to the side, because I feel like I care so much about responding to her but she is giving me nothing back...

I get that things are pretty stressful for her right now, having 2 kids and she's recovering from a pregnancy, she has to go back to work soon and there's a lot of stuff, but right now one of her kids are out of state with their father and yesterday she was telling me a lot that she is bored, when she was watching the hunger game movies. Like I know for a fact she is not as busy with everything as she usually is, yet... not a single response today.. it is just really itching me the wrong way and thought I'd come here to maybe ask for advice because dude... I worry about people so much, especially if we are dating and this is lowkey making me feel really sick to the stomach...

EDIT: that feeling when you accidentally fuck up, but it is probably for the best and in a strangely positive way. Thank you all.

​

So pretty much I feel like there is definitely this balance to maintain... but the issue is that my girlfriend and I are in different towns and she is struggling to pay for gas while my car is just completely not working..

So what happens is that over time when we text each other for long enough without seeing each other in person it's liek this equilibrium starts to become unbalanced, it is like there is so much context that is not able to be seen when only texting and my girlfriend seems to not really enjoy phone calls much but I will have to ask her if we can call more often. But essentially over time our texts spiral out of balance over time and I know she is a busy person, she has two kids and they're new borns, while I'm kind of here just trying to not rush things but at the same time I want to be apart of not just hers but her kids life. So there are moments when I feel like she ignores me a lot or doesn't really get the emotional message I'm trying to convey or need to hear over text, or does but doesn't respond with much in general when we haven't seen each other in person for a bit, then over time I get frustrated and I just kind of get cranky, but usually I apologize for acting this way because I know I have mental issues I'm trying so hard to keep at bay when things like this happen.

for example she was talking about the new Hunger Games movie coming out and how she wanted to watch all of the old ones with me, and I 100% would love to do that with her... but today she asked what I was doing and I told her I was working on music and I asked what she was doing and she told me she's watching the hunger games movies with out me, and I got upset and she was confused why I was upset but I told her that she told me we were going to watch them together for when the new movie comes out. She said I'm sorry i just got bored and they're my favorite movies I watch them all the time. And i get that, I'm the same way with videogames, she says she watches them a lot to find small details she missed and I'm the same exact way with videogames.

But, what I'm trying to get at is, some times when we spend too much time away and we only text, it's almost like things just feel neglected and not good. But then there are infact moments where we meet in person and it's like we have the most wonderful time ever, and when she goes home she is absolutely excited about texting me and being super emotionally understanding and responsive... but then over time it goes back to that imbalance, and I've also had this happen in a past relationship where it is the opposite, where if we are together in person too much then it's like... one of us just wants space and it feels very much like over watering a plant or starving a plant, or giving it too much nutrients or sun light some times, like I really want this relationship to work so desperately and she has told me the same feelings and I just don't want the mistakes of my previous relationships to happen again, because those happened for a reason for me to learn from, seriously..

But I am just sincerely wondering if anyone here has the same issues that I'm going through...

Something I am aware of though is that I have a really good feeling things are going to get better soon, once my car is fixed, also im in the process of being put onto disability because my neck and shoulder are injured pretty badly and also I've had a long intense history of mental health issues I've been seeking professional help for, like therapy and psychiatrist for meds and I have a casemanager that meets up with me some times we go for walks and she even helped me get a lawyer to help me in my process of getting disability, she is very confident that I will be getting disability and I am really just praying I get this disability because I want to fix this car, I feel bad for her having to drive to me all the time, I want to start driving to her and she said she would really like that too...

But yeah, sorry for talking so much, I think I got everything off my chest and would seriously appreciate some relatable insights I suppose.. hahaha..

So this is an issue ive been running into lately, and I know a lot of people are going to tell me to automate the tempo, but I kind of want to avoid doing that because to me, it gets pretty confusing and a lot harder to edit the track, maybe im just doing it incorrectly... but I am just trying to figure out how to do this properly i guess, Im confused on if I should cut the tracts at the spots where the BPM changes, or just leave the track as one continuous MP3 track with no cuts, but at the same time I really wish I could select a specific point on the playlist timeline and specifically cut the track and place sections to have different BPM/Tempos because it would be so much more simpler that way..

Anyways, any advice would be helpful, even if u gotta call me dumb lol..

So pretty much I feel like there is definitely this balance to maintain... but the issue is that my girlfriend and I are in different towns and she is struggling to pay for gas while my car is just completely not working..

So what happens is that over time when we text each other for long enough without seeing each other in person it's liek this equilibrium starts to become unbalanced, it is like there is so much context that is not able to be seen when only texting and my girlfriend seems to not really enjoy phone calls much but I will have to ask her if we can call more often. But essentially over time our texts spiral out of balance over time and I know she is a busy person, she has two kids and they're new borns, while I'm kind of here just trying to not rush things but at the same time I want to be apart of not just hers but her kids life. So there are moments when I feel like she ignores me a lot or doesn't really get the emotional message I'm trying to convey or need to hear over text, or does but doesn't respond with much in general when we haven't seen each other in person for a bit, then over time I get frustrated and I just kind of get cranky, but usually I apologize for acting this way because I know I have mental issues I'm trying so hard to keep at bay when things like this happen.

for example she was talking about the new Hunger Games movie coming out and how she wanted to watch all of the old ones with me, and I 100% would love to do that with her... but today she asked what I was doing and I told her I was working on music and I asked what she was doing and she told me she's watching the hunger games movies with out me, and I got upset and she was confused why I was upset but I told her that she told me we were going to watch them together for when the new movie comes out. She said I'm sorry i just got bored and they're my favorite movies I watch them all the time. And i get that, I'm the same way with videogames, she says she watches them a lot to find small details she missed and I'm the same exact way with videogames.

But, what I'm trying to get at is, some times when we spend too much time away and we only text, it's almost like things just feel neglected and not good. But then there are infact moments where we meet in person and it's like we have the most wonderful time ever, and when she goes home she is absolutely excited about texting me and being super emotionally understanding and responsive... but then over time it goes back to that imbalance, and I've also had this happen in a past relationship where it is the opposite, where if we are together in person too much then it's like... one of us just wants space and it feels very much like over watering a plant or starving a plant, or giving it too much nutrients or sun light some times, like I really want this relationship to work so desperately and she has told me the same feelings and I just don't want the mistakes of my previous relationships to happen again, because those happened for a reason for me to learn from, seriously..

But I am just sincerely wondering if anyone here has the same issues that I'm going through...

Something I am aware of though is that I have a really good feeling things are going to get better soon, once my car is fixed, also im in the process of being put onto disability because my neck and shoulder are injured pretty badly and also I've had a long intense history of mental health issues I've been seeking professional help for, like therapy and psychiatrist for meds and I have a casemanager that meets up with me some times we go for walks and she even helped me get a lawyer to help me in my process of getting disability, she is very confident that I will be getting disability and I am really just praying I get this disability because I want to fix this car, I feel bad for her having to drive to me all the time, I want to start driving to her and she said she would really like that too...

But yeah, sorry for talking so much, I think I got everything off my chest and would seriously appreciate some relatable insights I suppose... thank you for your time reading this post.

So pretty much I feel like there is definitely this balance to maintain... but the issue is that my girlfriend and I are in different towns and she is struggling to pay for gas while my car is just completely not working..

So what happens is that over time when we text each other for long enough without seeing each other in person it's liek this equilibrium starts to become unbalanced, it is like there is so much context that is not able to be seen when only texting and my girlfriend seems to not really enjoy phone calls much but I will have to ask her if we can call more often. But essentially over time our texts spiral out of balance over time and I know she is a busy person, she has two kids and they're new borns, while I'm kind of here just trying to not rush things but at the same time I want to be apart of not just hers but her kids life. So there are moments when I feel like she ignores me a lot or doesn't really get the emotional message I'm trying to convey or need to hear over text, or does but doesn't respond with much in general when we haven't seen each other in person for a bit, then over time I get frustrated and I just kind of get cranky, but usually I apologize for acting this way because I know I have mental issues I'm trying so hard to keep at bay when things like this happen.

for example she was talking about the new Hunger Games movie coming out and how she wanted to watch all of the old ones with me, and I 100% would love to do that with her... but today she asked what I was doing and I told her I was working on music and I asked what she was doing and she told me she's watching the hunger games movies with out me, and I got upset and she was confused why I was upset but I told her that she told me we were going to watch them together for when the new movie comes out. She said I'm sorry i just got bored and they're my favorite movies I watch them all the time. And i get that, I'm the same way with videogames, she says she watches them a lot to find small details she missed and I'm the same exact way with videogames.

But, what I'm trying to get at is, some times when we spend too much time away and we only text, it's almost like things just feel neglected and not good. But then there are infact moments where we meet in person and it's like we have the most wonderful time ever, and when she goes home she is absolutely excited about texting me and being super emotionally understanding and responsive... but then over time it goes back to that imbalance, and I've also had this happen in a past relationship where it is the opposite, where if we are together in person too much then it's like... one of us just wants space and it feels very much like over watering a plant or starving a plant, or giving it too much nutrients or sun light some times, like I really want this relationship to work so desperately and she has told me the same feelings and I just don't want the mistakes of my previous relationships to happen again, because those happened for a reason for me to learn from, seriously..

But I am just sincerely wondering if anyone here has the same issues that I'm going through...

Something I am aware of though is that I have a really good feeling things are going to get better soon, once my car is fixed, also im in the process of being put onto disability because my neck and shoulder are injured pretty badly and also I've had a long intense history of mental health issues I've been seeking professional help for, like therapy and psychiatrist for meds and I have a casemanager that meets up with me some times we go for walks and she even helped me get a lawyer to help me in my process of getting disability, she is very confident that I will be getting disability and I am really just praying I get this disability because I want to fix this car, I feel bad for her having to drive to me all the time, I want to start driving to her and she said she would really like that too...

But yeah, sorry for talking so much, I think I got everything off my chest and would seriously appreciate some relatable insights I suppose.. hahaha..

Shot in the dark, but I lost an account I was dating someone and was going through a very bad mental health decline and deleted everything from my phone, reset my phone entirely and my ex and I broke up like 6 months afterwards. Now there is an Old facebook account that has a picture of me and her together that is ruining my mental health, it is being brought up by almost everyone I connect with and this relationship ended like 2 years ago.

I have been trying literally everything to log into this account, I've reported the photo specifically through meta's AI assistant but it told me there was an error making the submission..

I've tried reporting it as hacked and tried recovering it, I've gotten the accounts numerical ID and just nothing works.

What if I just sue them, like small claims court maybe?

Then once a month we pick someone new. One day it's a homeless dude in Canada, the next it's some child in Australia or girl in Africa, maybe one day it will be you or I. But we just pick randomly.

Kind of like Employee of the month, but Human of the month instead.

I used to produce my own music all the time, I was actually addicted to it, Id make about 5 beats in a single day at one point. As I got more into producing though, as someone with very low income, I decided that I wanted to try practicing my vocal development. Eventually though it felt like a very big tug of war, If I focused on vocals then my production quality would take a hit and if I produced my own beats then my vocal style would take a hit. So I started finding so many type beats on youtube, I've came such a long way in terms of vocal production, I have vocals on so many different genres now. 1 year ago I decided to get into metal vocals and learning how to scream, it has been such a good stress reliever. I have a group of friends that are producers too we all chat online in groups and I would show them my work, often I would reach out to the beat makers and get their feedback on my music as well as online streams too and it has just been such a good journey... I honestly feel so blessed to be born at the time I was and now as an adult it is like there are so many avenues you can choose to walk down in the music scene, whether you want to be a vocalist, guitarist, make your own beats.... honestly is such a blessing and I love every second of it.

The best thing is that I have reached out to people looking for metal vocalists locally and I had my first ever audition, it didnt go well but it taught me that I need to make my own band, I have such a good understanding of producing mixing and mastering I feel like now I am in the perfect spot to finally step away from YouTube type beats, I have such an in depth portfolio now, I can show people my own beats, or beats I've collaborated with others on and when I do start a band I can get really into the thick of it and fine tune everything to how it should sound.

Just thought I would post this here for anyone that kind of feels stuck in their music journey, I have hit so many mental blocks and hurdles over the years, I've met so many good people that make music in so many different genres. It finally feels like I have like my own little music family now, it is very wholesome.

In elementary school we had a teacher from Binford elementary school be a subsitute teacher for Arlington elementary school. This was around 2009 I believe.. One day my friends and I were in library class and he came up to our table and asked us all if we wanted to be apart of a drumming band with Congo drums.

We preformed at Binford during the lotus festival and also Arlington and it was such an amazing experience. Recently I have been very deep in a musical journey now that I am an adult, I tried reaching out to both schools but I couldn't find any leads. I tried talking to Arlington seeing if my original music teacher during my time there could help me find his contact but unfortunately she had passed away..

I feel like this is a shot in the dark but could anyone please help me find some leads on how to find my old music drum teacher Mr. Preboy? It would mean the world to me!

Hello, my name is Zachariah. I was born and based in Bloomington Indiana and I have been studying and developing my metal vocals since September 12, 2025, I will be posting my portfolio here for anyone interested to look at and see if you perhaps are interested yourself. The top is my most recent work and the bottom is my oldest!

I am looking for a guitarist, bassist and a drummer for this local band project. Please comment down below or shoot me a DM if you or anyone you know may be interested!

I tried auditioning for a local metal band but their workflow was very rushed and unprofessional in my opinion, true art takes time and I would like to work with people who greatly understand this! I am heavily interested in playing live gigs around town, even out of town as well!

Have a wonderful day, thank you very much for your time!

(My Current Up To Date Portfolio)

Album Cover Photo

Hello, my name is Zachariah and I have been studying and developing my metal vocals since September 12, 2025, I will be posting my portfolio here for anyone interested to look at and see if you perhaps are interested yourself. The top is my most recent work and the bottom is my oldest!

I am looking for a guitarist, bassist and a drummer for this local band project. Please comment down below or shoot me a DM if you or anyone you know may be interested!

I tried auditioning for a local metal band but their workflow was very rushed and unprofessional in my opinion, true art takes time and I would like to work with people who greatly understand this! I am heavily interested in playing live gigs around town, even out of town as well!

Have a wonderful day, thank you very much for your time!

(My Current Up To Date Portfolio)

Album Cover Image

https://preview.redd.it/d3sumu8upuch1.png?width=331&format=png&auto=webp&s=901157a6e9e0acf7b0f6e15845f0af52fa9e3b2e

I used this emote in my friends stream and he made me aware that it for some reason costs wayyyy too much, I had no idea this was set like this until this very moment...

Pretty much just barely getting by with foodstamps. I try to buy very cheap things, like lunch meat, frozen fruit and milk for shakes, tortillas cuz in allergic to bread (yeast) and also some times I just say fuck it and buy a steak cuz I know I'm going to run out of food money anyways.

I've went from 250lbs down to 225lbs but it's been a really slow process and only happens when I run out of food stamps. There was a while where I was buying a lot of processed frozen foods but then I would start gaining a lot of weight and idk usually I go like 2-3 weeks with food then 1-2 weeks with no food..

It's rough cuz I have health issues, stenosis and arthritis in my neck and my right shoulder girdle is deranged and my cuff is torn, and also when I buy food my uncle eats it too 😭

I'm in the process of working with lawyers to be put into disability cuz I have mental health issues too... but man... this shits rough...

I feel like everyone is trying to learn how to keep relationships and what not. I'm not looking for relationship advice, I'm simply just curious as to why this app feels so... cruel to people who actually want relationship advice and succeed in their relationships?

It is very very strange, like do people just want other people on the internet to be lonely and miserable? Why not just be there and understand someone's issue and help them understand how to be a better person instead of pressuring them into ruining their relationships?