u/OrganizationOver6741

Ok I’m only in high school but I’m thinking about career paths. I know that CRNA’s get paid really well, but so do other careers and I don’t think I have ever seen a career get as much praise as this one from people working the job. Like job satisfaction seems so high, and I’m wondering why. Like it has to be more than just the high salary right? If you are a CRNA, what do you enjoy most about the actual work of your job? To me the job itself doesn’t seem super fun like you’re monitoring a persons vitals for hours on end? Seems exhausting. Important, but exhausting. It also seems super complicated and hard like the actual task seems very technical? But once again I don’t really know much about this job so I could be wrong. Feel free to educate me in the comments. But yeah like what is so great about this job?

For context I’m a sophomore in high school and the past year and a half I have really been struggling with body image and disordered eating and it’s really taken a toll on me. My weight has swung between 113 and 137 during this time period. Right now I’m technically not overweight or anything but I don’t like how I look. Anyways I’m just exhausted with it all. The constant fixation on food, calories, my body, etc. I haven’t had a single day in the past over a year where I haven’t thought about it.

I also have OCD that’s appearance and weight related which just makes the whole process 100x harder. I am in therapy for ocd currently.

Next issue is friend stuff. I have had a really hard time finding my group of people that I really feel like I belong with. Like I have friends, but zero stability and I don’t feel like I have a set group. And I feel like my friends are always choosing other people over me and no matter how hard I try I feel like no one genuinely chooses me.

So I kind of just feel really bad. I don’t love myself and I also don’t feel like other people love me. It’s really been taking a toll on me for a long time and I don’t really know what to do anymore.

My brain genuinely is so polluted with body and food stuff and it’s also taken a toll on my physical body. I’ve lost my period already for 9 months and then got it back, but I think I may be losing it again as it is over a month late.

I’m someone who truly values human interaction and feeling loved and cared for by others that genuinely like me and choose me. I feel like I’m not getting that either.

So yeah these issues have taken up the end of 8th grade, all of freshman year, and now are taking up my sophomore year. I’m just genuinely so unhappy and don’t know what to do anymore.

I’m having an ocd thought right now that the way I just rearranged my room- though it looks better and don’t want to put anything back- will make me weird and make my mind weird and ill become one of the weird girls like I was in 7th grade and I’ll stop leveling up and my personality will change and my brain will think differently. I feel like I’m feeling it happen right now

I’m diagnosed with ocd, and I’ve had it since I was 7. It has shifted from different types over the years, normally according to what’s most important to me in the moment. I’ve struggled with a good deal of disordered eating over the years and my ocd does not help. I have truly not heard anyone ever talk about something like this before and I feel alone. It ties strongly to body dysmorphia

An hypothetical example of something incredibly triggering would be: I eat a slice of cake. I happen to look in the mirror afterwards. I really like how my face and body look. my weight looks distributed how I want it to, my waist and face look slim. I feel especially confident right now. I connect this appearance to the slice of cake I just ate, like the cake supported the way my body looks in that current moment in time. that means, if I were to eat another slice, it would undo it and my appearance would go in the opposite direction. This is because 1=3 and 2=4. kinda of like in the Ariel movie where she’s picking the leaves and she’s like he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not. so then let’s say I can’t resist and I eat another slice of cake. then I look in the mirror and I literally physically see my body look different. I’m not talking about a bloat. I’m talking my face and weight distribution is completely different and I hate it. this means that I have to eat another slice of cake in order to cancel it out. Then when I eat the third slice it is equal to the first one that made me look good in the first place so then I look in the mirror, and I physically see that my body has changed back.

It also latches onto other things like my metabolism and then I obsess over that.

I truly feel so alone. I feel like everyone is always talking about contamination or harm ocd (which are valid forms, not discrediting them if you are someone who struggles with them because I too have struggled with those forms in the past.) But I even googled body dysmorphia ocd and i didnt even resonate at all with the examples that google was giving.

Yes I’m in therapy but I feel like my therapist doesn’t even fully grasp how I feel or how my ocd works. I just feel like I’m the only person in the world that has this which makes it feel less like textbook ocd and more “real” I guess, like not completely irrational which only strengths the compulsions.

I’m diagnosed with ocd, and I’ve had it since I was 7. It has shifted from different types over the years, normally according to what’s most important to me in the moment. I’ve struggled with a good deal of disordered eating over the years and my ocd does not help. I have truly not heard anyone ever talk about something like this before and I feel alone. It ties strongly to body dysmorphia

An hypothetical example of something incredibly triggering would be: I eat a slice of cake. I happen to look in the mirror afterwards. I really like how my face and body look. my weight looks distributed how I want it to, my waist and face look slim. I feel especially confident right now. I connect this appearance to the slice of cake I just ate, like the cake supported the way my body looks in that current moment in time. that means, if I were to eat another slice, it would undo it and my appearance would go in the opposite direction. This is because 1=3 and 2=4. kinda of like in the Ariel movie where she’s picking the leaves and she’s like he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not. so then let’s say I can’t resist and I eat another slice of cake. then I look in the mirror and I literally physically see my body look different. I’m not talking about a bloat. I’m talking my face and weight distribution is completely different and I hate it. this means that I have to eat another slice of cake in order to cancel it out. Then when I eat the third slice it is equal to the first one that made me look good in the first place so then I look in the mirror, and I physically see that my body has changed back.

It also latches onto other things like my metabolism and then I obsess over that.

I truly feel so alone. I feel like everyone is always talking about contamination or harm ocd (which are valid forms, not discrediting them if you are someone who struggles with them because I too have struggled with those forms in the past.) But I even googled body dysmorphia ocd and i didnt even resonate at all with the examples that google was giving.

Yes I’m in therapy but I feel like my therapist doesn’t even fully grasp how I feel or how my ocd works. I just feel like I’m the only person in the world that has this which makes it feel less like textbook ocd and more “real” I guess, like not completely irrational which only strengths the compulsions.

I’m diagnosed with ocd, and I’ve had it since I was 7. It has shifted from different types over the years, normally according to what’s most important to me in the moment. I’ve struggled with a good deal of disordered eating over the years and my ocd does not help. I have truly not heard anyone ever talk about something like this before and I feel alone. It ties strongly to body dysmorphia

An hypothetical example of something incredibly triggering would be: I eat a slice of cake. I happen to look in the mirror afterwards. I really like how my face and body look. my weight looks distributed how I want it to, my waist and face look slim. I feel especially confident right now. I connect this appearance to the slice of cake I just ate, like the cake supported the way my body looks in that current moment in time. that means, if I were to eat another slice, it would undo it and my appearance would go in the opposite direction. This is because 1=3 and 2=4. kinda of like in the Ariel movie where she’s picking the leaves and she’s like he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not. so then let’s say I can’t resist and I eat another slice of cake. then I look in the mirror and I literally physically see my body look different. I’m not talking about a bloat. I’m talking my face and weight distribution is completely different and I hate it. this means that I have to eat another slice of cake in order to cancel it out. Then when I eat the third slice it is equal to the first one that made me look good in the first place so then I look in the mirror, and I physically see that my body has changed back.

It also latches onto other things like my metabolism and then I obsess over that.

I truly feel so alone. I feel like everyone is always talking about contamination or harm ocd (which are valid forms, not discrediting them if you are someone who struggles with them because I too have struggled with those forms in the past.) But I even googled body dysmorphia ocd and i didnt even resonate at all with the examples that google was giving.

Yes I’m in therapy but I feel like my therapist doesn’t even fully grasp how I feel or how my ocd works. I just feel like I’m the only person in the world that has this which makes it feel less like textbook ocd and more “real” I guess, like not completely irrational which only strengths the compulsions.


I’m diagnosed with ocd, and I’ve had it since I was 7. It has shifted from different types over the years, normally according to what’s most important to me in the moment. I’ve struggled with a good deal of disordered eating over the years and my ocd does not help. I have truly not heard anyone ever talk about something like this before and I feel alone. It ties strongly to body dysmorphia

An hypothetical example of something incredibly triggering would be: I eat a slice of cake. I happen to look in the mirror afterwards. I really like how my face and body look. my weight looks distributed how I want it to, my waist and face look slim. I feel especially confident right now. I connect this appearance to the slice of cake I just ate, like the cake supported the way my body looks in that current moment in time. that means, if I were to eat another slice, it would undo it and my appearance would go in the opposite direction. This is because 1=3 and 2=4. kinda of like in the Ariel movie where she’s picking the leaves and she’s like he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not. so then let’s say I can’t resist and I eat another slice of cake. then I look in the mirror and I literally physically see my body look different. I’m not talking about a bloat. I’m talking my face and weight distribution is completely different and I hate it. this means that I have to eat another slice of cake in order to cancel it out. Then when I eat the third slice it is equal to the first one that made me look good in the first place so then I look in the mirror, and I physically see that my body has changed back.

It also latches onto other things like my metabolism and then I obsess over that.

I truly feel so alone. I feel like everyone is always talking about contamination or harm ocd (which are valid forms, not discrediting them if you are someone who struggles with them because I too have struggled with those forms in the past.) But I even googled body dysmorphia ocd and i didnt even resonate at all with the examples that google was giving.

Yes I’m in therapy but I feel like my therapist doesn’t even fully grasp how I feel or how my ocd works. I just feel like I’m the only person in the world that has this which makes it feel less like textbook ocd and more “real” I guess, like not completely irrational which only strengths the compulsions.

Hey I’m 16f and I would like to make some friends! Please please please only girls I don’t want any creeps. I’ll make an exception for gay guys lmao.

Hey I’m 16f and I have been lonely recently and would love to talk to someone.

Tomorrow I will starting a 10 week aggressive deficit to lose 20lbs. Don’t worry, it’s doctor approved. Any tips or tricks to make it less miserable and to help me stick to it? Food related or non food related. Distractions, hobbies, ways to make the time pass etc etc.

Hi I am female 5’2.75 (almost 5’3), and 135lbs. My weight has been all over the place the past year and the lowest it has been has been about 110. I really want to be 95. Out of curiosity, what do you think I should aim for?

I’m almost 16f and I have never been in a romantic relationship before or even really had a real life crush before. I’ve had celebrity crushes though. Anyways I want to just feel loved so bad and really find someone that I actually like. I just don’t know how to even do this and I’ve been wanting a relationship for years. I had a situationship/first kiss hookup type thing with this guy that I had been talking to but I don’t talk to him anymore and I didn’t even have feelings for him tbh. Anyways yeah I’m just YEARNING to have an actual relationship and feel loved.

For the past 17 months, I don’t think I have been truly happy. Maybe I’ve been happy, but I haven’t felt joy. I have been struggling with food/body image so much. Back in spring 2025 I gained 5 pounds and it made me spiral because of my history with body image issues that I had gotten over. This completely fucked with relationship with food and then for the next year and a half I don’t know if there’s been a single week where I have maintained my weight. I’m either starving myself or binging. Weight loss or weight gain. The weeks I maybe have maintained aren’t due to normal eating patterns either. Starving most of the week and binging a couple of days that averages out to maintenance.

I essentially spent all last summer trying to lose the 5lbs that I gained, but instead just fucked myself over more and then gained another 10. Most miserable summer ever. The following school year (my freshman year) after that summer I really locked in. It was because I had so many distractions and take all honors so I was a busy girl. I basically ate <1000 calories every single day and lost all the weight I gained plus 5 more lbs in about 8-10weeks. Also lost my period.

Then the rebound started and I gained all of it back slowly but surely. The Christmas season was filled with binging every night. Thanksgiving was awful. Christmas was awful. I feel like there was no more magic. My mind was just polluted with all these thoughts. Calories, weight, body shape, plans, etc etc. to be honest my life has just felt like a plan and not actually my life.

Then the new year started but no new habits. I obviously made another weight loss plan where some days I would eat 700 calories a day and then some days I ate like 5000. It was truly all over the place.

That continued on until after Valentine’s Day and then I decided to try and start over and deal my relationship with food. At this point I was about 124lbs. My lowest back before holiday season was 113 and my starting original weight was around 130. So I had not gained all of the weight back quite yet because of all the starving periods I put myself through. Anyways, I made these strides to heal and let’s just say it didn’t work. Food noise was AWFUL. And binging was happening still. This led to more weight gain which then just triggered my starvation again.

I go through spring and gain more weight because then I start binging like crazy. I’ve probably made like 100 weight loss plans at this point. I just keep starting over. Fast forward to now and I’m at my highest weight ever (135lbs) and i just made another plan to lose 40lbs by the end of 2026 or start of 2027 hopefully. I know it’s gonna fucking suck too. I also have bad ocd so that’s also been weighing on me, and a lot of it is related to body image/metabolism/weight loss plans.

I am also feeling a lot of pressure to reach a goal fast and soon because I’m a teenager and I feel lien I’m missing out on my teenage years. I don’t feel like a teenager and don’t want to miss out on my prime.

So anyways thanks for listening I genuinely just feel like all the joy and life has been sucked out of me and I am having a hard time managing as this has gone on for too long. I don’t even feel like myself and I don’t feel like my life even belongs to me. The cliffnotes version of this is: I look like shit, I feel like shit, others don’t give a shit about me, and the shithole I’m stuck in is like 20 feet deep and I don’t know how I’m supposed to get out.

For the past 17 months, I don’t think I have been truly happy. Maybe I’ve been happy, but I haven’t felt joy. I have been struggling with food/body image so much.

Back in spring 2025 I gained 5 pounds and it made me spiral because of my history with body image issues that I had gotten over. This completely fucked with relationship with food and then for the next year and a half I don’t know if there’s been a single week where I have maintained my weight. I’m either starving myself or binging. Weight loss or weight gain. The weeks I maybe have maintained aren’t due to normal eating patterns either. Starving most of the week and binging a couple of days that averages out to maintenance.

I essentially spent all last summer trying to lose the 5lbs that I gained, but instead just fucked myself over more and then gained another 10. Most miserable summer ever. The following school year (my freshman year) after that summer I really locked in. It was because I had so many distractions and take all honors so I was a busy girl. I basically ate <1000 calories every single day and lost all the weight I gained plus 5 more lbs in about 8-10weeks. Also lost my period.

Then the rebound started and I gained all of it back slowly but surely. The Christmas season was filled with binging every night. Thanksgiving was awful. Christmas was awful. I feel like there was no more magic. My mind was just polluted with all these thoughts. Calories, weight, body shape, plans, etc etc. to be honest my life has just felt like a plan and not actually my life.

Then the new year started but no new habits. I obviously made another weight loss plan where some days I would eat 700 calories a day and then some days I ate like 5000. It was truly all over the place.

That continued on until after Valentine’s Day and then I decided to try and start over and deal my relationship with food. At this point I was about 124lbs. My lowest back before holiday season was 113 and my starting original weight was around 130. So I had not gained all of the weight back quite yet because of all the starving periods I put myself through.

Anyways, I made these strides to heal and let’s just say it didn’t work. Food noise was AWFUL. And binging was happening still. This led to more weight gain which then just triggered my starvation again. I go through spring and gain more weight because then I start binging like crazy. I’ve probably made like 100 weight loss plans at this point. I just keep starting over. Over and over again.

Fast forward to now and I’m at my highest weight ever (135lbs) and i just made another plan to lose 40lbs by the end of 2026 or start of 2027 hopefully. I know it’s gonna fucking suck too. I also have bad ocd so that’s also been weighing on me, and a lot of it is related to body image/metabolism/weight loss plans.

I also have friends, but I haven’t really found my group. I often feel unloved or like no one likes me, which number 1 makes me depressed and number 2 just fuels the starvation.

I am also feeling a lot of pressure to reach a goal fast and soon because I’m a teenager and I feel like I’m missing out on my teenage years. I live in swampy t shirts right now and never see anyone. I see other girls wearing cute outfits that I couldn’t wear unless I was skinny, they have their little boyfriends and are always hanging out with their friends. I guess what I’m trying to say is I don’t feel like a teenager and don’t want to miss out on my prime. I feel like looks don’t matter when you’re old as much.

So anyways thanks for listening I genuinely just feel like all the joy and life has been sucked out of me and I am having a hard time managing as this has gone on for too long. I don’t even feel like myself and I don’t feel like my life even belongs to me. The cliffnotes version of this is: I look like shit, I feel like shit, others don’t give a shit about me, and the shithole I’m stuck in is like 20 feet deep and I don’t know how I’m supposed to get out.

For the past 17 months, I don’t think I have been truly happy. Maybe I’ve been happy, but I haven’t felt joy. I have been struggling with food/body image so much. Back in spring 2025 I gained 5 pounds and it made me spiral because of my history with body image issues that I had gotten over. This completely fucked with relationship with food and then for the next year and a half I don’t know if there’s been a single week where I have maintained my weight. I’m either starving myself or binging. Weight loss or weight gain. The weeks I maybe have maintained aren’t due to normal eating patterns either. Starving most of the week and binging a couple of days that averages out to maintenance. I essentially spent all last summer trying to lose the 5lbs that I gained, but instead just fucked myself over more and then gained another 10. Most miserable summer ever. The following school year (my freshman year) after that summer I really locked in. It was because I had so many distractions and take all honors so I was a busy girl. I basically ate <1000 calories every single day and lost all the weight I gained plus 5 more lbs in about 8-10weeks. Also lost my period. Then the rebound started and I gained all of it back slowly but surely. The Christmas season was filled with binging every night. Thanksgiving was awful. Christmas was awful. I feel like there was no more magic. My mind was just polluted with all these thoughts. Calories, weight, body shape, plans, etc etc. to be honest my life has just felt like a plan and not actually my life. Then the new year started but no new habits. I obviously made another weight loss plan where some days I would eat 700 calories a day and then some days I ate like 5000. It was truly all over the place. That continued on until after Valentine’s Day and then I decided to try and start over and deal my relationship with food. At this point I was about 124lbs. My lowest back before holiday season was 113 and my starting original weight was around 130. So I had not gained all of the weight back quite yet because of all the starving periods I put myself through. Anyways, I made these strides to heal and let’s just say it didn’t work. Food noise was AWFUL. And binging was happening still. This led to more weight gain which then just triggered my starvation again. I go through spring and gain more weight because then I start binging like crazy. I’ve probably made like 100 weight loss plans at this point. I just keep starting over. Over and over again. Fast forward to now and I’m at my highest weight ever (135lbs) and i just made another plan to lose 40lbs by the end of 2026 or start of 2027 hopefully. I know it’s gonna fucking suck too. I also have bad ocd so that’s also been weighing on me, and a lot of it is related to body image/metabolism/weight loss plans. I also have friends, but I haven’t really found my group. I often feel unloved or like no one likes me, which number 1 makes me depressed and number 2 just fuels the starvation. I am also feeling a lot of pressure to reach a goal fast and soon because I’m a teenager and I feel lien I’m missing out on my teenage years. I live in swampy t shirts right now and never see anyone. I see other girls wearing cute outfits that I couldn’t wear unless I was skinny, they have their little boyfriends and are always hanging out with their friends. I guess what I’m trying to say is I don’t feel like a teenager and don’t want to miss out on my prime. I feel like looks don’t matter when you’re old as much. So anyways thanks for listening I genuinely just feel like all the joy and life has been sucked out of me and I am having a hard time managing as this has gone on for too long. I don’t even feel like myself and I don’t feel like my life even belongs to me. The cliffnotes version of this is: I look like shit, I feel like shit, others don’t give a shit about me, and the shithole I’m stuck in is like 20 feet deep and I don’t know how I’m supposed to get out.

I relate to Lexi and Cassie the most. I know that sounds like a contradiction but for me, I relate deeply to Cassie’s inner desires + motives and also her overall vibe. However Lexi reflects how I actually act and my personality + where I stand in society.

I’ll go first:

1. Nat- shes just the best. The most sane and helpful and she genuinely is just such a badass.
2. Jackie- she’s just a vibe- she is a realistic representation about how someone would act in the wilderness, same with Mari whom I also love, and she’s funny asf.
3. Shauna- okay- I know she’s a bad person or whatever and I recognize that. But I think she’s such a complex character and I really enjoy watching her and I’m always rooting for her. I think her story is really interesting and it makes total sense why she is the way she is.

Honorable mentions: Lottie(misunderstood queen) and Mari (that girl is literally me)

Okay now you