u/ReasonableGator

Nothing Michael Jackson isn't there

And that day I learned spray paint dries in the throat, nit in the cup

Always wanting Wonder Woman, Superman flies down, has sex with her at super speed, then flies away.

Moments after, The Invisible Man rolls off Wonder Woman and asks, "what the hell just happened?"

Mom says, "Son, you were adopted."

Jimmy tears up a bit then cries hard and bursts out, " I want to meet my real parents."

To which his mother replies, "we are your real parents. Now go pack. You were adopted and they'll be here soon."

5,300 easy miles on my 2023 IS and during the service, they showed me I have tread wear and will need new tires in fewer that 10,000 miles.

The Lexus service coordinator said I'll go through tires fast in the IS.

Anyone else have a similar experience?

I told him that I don't have a cordless phone but I do stand in your baby's room sometimes and talk to it.

on my phone.

When I checked in at the hospital lab for routine blood tests, they gave me a code name. For privacy I guess

The check-in person handed me a few documents then said, “give this to the tech, they will be calling you Short Lee.”

It was a hairy situation and I've decided to part with the company

But mostly because she never shave her legs and likes poop in a box of sand in the corner.