u/Shitty-welder

6 months ago I had a partial patellaectomy. It really bums me out. How long does it take you to just live with it. Physically and mentally.

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I'm writing this to try and make sense of the resentment I carry towards my parents. With my mom, it's less about her personally and more about the environment I was raised in as a Jehovah's Witness. That upbringing was incredibly strict, dictating how I dressed, acted, and even thought. I feel like it robbed me of my adolescence and left me completely unprepared for things like talking to girls or just being myself. I came out of it feeling like a sissy, unable to navigate social situations most people figure out naturally. 

My resentment towards my dad is more direct and recent. He was always working out of town, so I never had a real male figure growing up. When he was home, he'd drink a lot, and though it wasn't violent, he never offered any approval. No matter how hard I worked on his job as an adult—work I hated and never wanted to do—he would never say anything positive. He'd praise others right in front of me, but for me, it was always that I wasn't a good worker or was scatterbrained. I stuck around because he needed help and couldn't find anyone else, but that decision feels like it cost me everything. Last year, I wanted to join the military in 2026 as a way to start a new life, away from all of this, but a bad car crash took that option away. Now I'm stuck, filled with regret and this massive amount of bitterness. I don't feel close to him, not even after the crash, and I have a deep disdain for the other guy who works for him, mixed with jealousy. I just wish I had left earlier. 

P.S I used A.I to write this for me... I kind of just, yapped and had it organize it for me. It's late and I'm sick. Sorry for fraternizing with a clanked. Also, there's a lot more to all this so if someone wants to converse with a weirdo I'll be more than happy to talk about all this shit.

Got in a crash last year that ended up with me losing about 1.5 to 2cm of patella along with a fracture in my frontal sinus area and some.busted up ribs. I'm a lot better now, so I usually just walk a decent Mount through out the day.

The whole things bums me out and makes me angry as I had planned to leave for the military this year. I also enjoyed martial arts and planned to return to them eventually. But now I just feel. Like, half a man? Like a vulnerable little thing. I don't know. I read online that I might not even be able to run which really fucking bums me out.

I guess I just wanted to hear some of y'all's experiences and vent at the same time.

I'm a small guy with metal in my skull and half a knee cap. I need some advice or guidelines for a for of self defense right for me. I'd hate to get punched in the head and lights out

Car crashes suck, don't fuck and drive

Went through a rough car crash last October. Lost part of my knee cap and cracked my frontal sinus area. So I can no longer do martial arts nor can I join the military like I had planned to do so before the accident. I use pot to relax. When I'm high I kind of don't it funny how angry I am when I'm sober and even find what I'm angry about fun y as well.