u/TimelyIsopod38

Due to several chronic illness and severe adhd I have struggled with going back to school and leaving for over a decade. Currently I am medicated for all of my issues for the first time ever. I have been working at a university in a student job essentially the past year. I am the healthiest I’ve ever been.

Last time I was in school was 2023 for History. However I really want to go back to biotechnology as I’ve always been passionate about science and genetics. I took AP bio and AP genetics in highschool and wanted to do that originally but due to fatigue and overwhelm picked an easier major that didn’t have long lab hours. But now it’s what I want to do and I’m tired of feeling directionless, embarrassed and broke. I did drop out without finishing that final semester as my father got a tbi. I did go to an admission meeting in 2024 (without a major change) and they did agree to let me come back that time though I didn’t pursue it.

I am not totally sure if they’ll let me come back yet or do the major change. I am also nervous about how long it’s been since I’ve written a lab report or taken a science class.

I have made a couple friends with the young people here. A 20 year old and a 23 year old I hangout with outside of work pretty regularly.

However we can’t stay young forever and I’m now starting to not look so fresh faced anymore. People tend to guess I’m around 24-26. Occasionally 23. When I say I’m going back people think it’s grad school. I know I’ll need to take some freshmen level courses. I’m assuming it will take 2-3 years to finish. I am not gonna get any younger. This is a very large school that doesn’t have many (if at all non traditional students). The oldest person I met is going undergrad at 24 and he’s extremely insecure about it. I was bullied horrifically through out my youth due to the way my chronic illness changed my
appearance (hairloss, acne, obesity). I look healthy now, but am pretty sensitive to comments about my appearance. I don’t wanna be that cringe old weirdo people don’t want to work with.

I’m just worried about the shame or being a freak in the classroom.

Due to several chronic illness and severe adhd I have struggled with going back to school and leaving for over a decade. Currently I am medicated for all of my issues for the first time ever. I have been working at a university in a student job essentially the past year. I am the healthiest I’ve ever been.

Last time I was in school was 2023 for History. However I really want to go back to biotechnology as I’ve always been passionate about science and genetics. I took AP bio and AP genetics in highschool and wanted to do that originally but due to fatigue and overwhelm picked an easier major that didn’t have long lab hours. But now it’s what I want to do and I’m tired of feeling directionless, embarrassed and broke. I did drop out without finishing that final semester as my father got a tbi. I talked about coming back with a meeting in 2024 (without a major change) and they did agree to let me come back that time though I didn’t pursue it. I was still having some health struggles. I also owed some money that had me on hold before I could register for classes.

I have just now paid off the university what I owed and can start the process of going back and getting a meeting with admissions. I am not totally sure if they’ll let me come back yet or do the major change. I am also nervous about how long it’s been since I’ve written a lab report or taken a science class. I can write an art analysis or history paper in my sleep, but I’m pretty rusty on basic lab procedure.

I have made a couple friends with the young people here. A 20 year old and a 23 year old I hangout with outside of work pretty regularly.

However we can’t stay young forever and I’m now starting to not look so fresh faced anymore. People tend to guess I’m around 24-26. Occasionally 23. When I say I’m going back people think it’s grad school. I know I’ll need to take some freshmen level courses. I’m assuming it will take 2-3 years to finish. I am not gonna get any younger. This is a very large school that doesn’t have many (if at all non traditional students). The oldest person I met is going undergrad at 24 and he’s extremely insecure about it. I was bullied horrifically through out my youth due to the way my chronic illness changed my
appearance (hairloss, acne, obesity). I look healthy now, but am pretty sensitive to comments about my appearance. I don’t wanna be that cringe old weirdo people don’t want to work with.

I’m just worried about the shame or being a freak in the classroom. Any thoughts?

At 19 I got my first boyfriend. I dropped out of college, got extremely depressed and gained a ton weight. By the end of the relationship I was barely functioning. I was unemployed with the house a total wreck and listless.

When I got out of that relationship at 21 I moved across the country, got a job and felt a lot more peaceful. I ended up moving back to where I’m from, got into community college and then made it into a nice state university at 23.

At 24 I got a boyfriend, (the pandemic amongst other things) made me drop out again I gained a ton of weight (almost at 300lbs now) my hair was falling out and I was the most anxious I had been in my life.

When I got out of that relationship at 26 I lost 90lbs and rebranded myself entirely. I stopped being a goth party girl and opted a natural look and got my shit together. I became a manager at a grocery store and started going back to school again. I had a 3.7gpa and was in the best shape of my life.

I got a boyfriend quickly with the kind of male attention I had never gotten before because of the weight loss and aesthetic change. After a year I dropped out of college again. I became unemployed and then got a very low paying job. I gained back 50lbs. I became very depressed and listless.

Now four years later I’m 30 and thinking about ending that relationship. I moved out, and am planning on going back to college again (this time medicated for adhd with a strict plan).

I know I can’t blame all of this on boyfriends. I had serious health issues, ptsd, and severe adhd. I am just now gaining the frontal lobe to cope with these things and be organized. I just notice this pattern when my life takes a nose dive when I’m in a relationship. I’m not sure why this is.

I was moving furniture with my boyfriend and he said something that made me laugh so I said “oh laughing weakness hold on real quick” and I put down the other end of a dresser I was holding. My boyfriend accused me of making it up so I didn’t have to hold the dresser and asked what I was even talking about. I was really confused because I thought everyone got laughing weakness.

When I laugh at all my body gets weak and I basically can’t hold or carry anything heavy. It’s hard to explain, if I’m laughing my muscles don’t corporate. I almost get a tingly feeling or like I’m about to sneeze and then my muscles get weak. I can easily drop something if I’m laughing. Once I stop laughing and take a second I’m totally normal again. My whole family gets this and I thought it was a totally normal and just an accepted involuntary reaction. So what’s laughing weakness and apparently not everyone gets it?

I dread having sex with my boyfriend and I feel so guilty about it.

Me 30F and my boyfriend 36M have been together for four years. Our relationship has had a lot of ups and downs but I know he’d do anything for me and he’s my best friend.

We have ALWAYS had sexual compatibility issues. When we first met I just thought he was the hottest thing in the world but I was coming out of a sub/domme relationship (and he’s extremely vanilla and was pretty inexperienced). I felt like I could handle giving up the kink for him. All my past kinky relationships my partners were horrible alcoholics or abusive so I thought it was best to leave it behind. He is kind, beautiful, sociable and hardworking. But beyond that he was very sex averse, I tried lingerie, toys, porn, asking what he likes and how I should ask etc. He just always said no or pushed away after the first month or two. He wouldn’t even change in front of me. We had sex maybe once a month or sometimes every other week. It was quiet and missionary. At the time it killed me inside. He told me we should be in an open relationship so I could get my needs met, but I went on one coffee date after two years of encouragement and he pulled back immediately and said we should just be monogamous.

After a while sex became extremely painful. It always felt less pleasurable than past partners (he is very big around) but then it was unbearable so I just brace for impact. I went to the doctor got sti tests and a pelvic exam and everything and she just told me i wasn’t aroused enough.

Fast forward to now he’s made huge strides. He wants to try new things and he initiates and tells me I’m incredibly sexy and I feel blech. We’ve tried rope, flogging, blindfolds and toys. It doesn’t ever stick since those things don’t turn him on. I feel like things would be good if I wanted to. I’ve tried so so hard. I don’t feel alive or on fire or excited. But I desperately want to be.

On Valentine’s Day he was open to trying a kink of mine and it was amazing and I felt close to him in that way for the first time in maybe ever. But then I got too ahead of myself and wanted to have sex everyday (not with said kink just in general) and he said it was too much. Something inside me just broke, I guess I felt like I had been pushed away so much that the one time I finally get there I was shut down again.

When we do anything sexual I just feel awkward and distracted and usually I’m very much not wet. I’m somehow over stimulated (in an irritable way) after a while I just want it to be over and even when we’re just kissing, I have to force myself to get over the “hump” of being extremely not mentally aroused until I’m somewhat physically aroused by having him rubbing my clit for a long time (which I’m pretty sure would just get anyone physically turned on) but I’m never turned on enough for PIV and it not be extremely painful. Admittedly sometimes I just ask for it because I know he’ll cum quickly and it will be over with. I feel far away and distracted. I rack my brain with anything to feel turned on. I ask him over and over what he’s thinking or feeling but he doesn’t like to talk much during sex or he fumbles his words or is confused by me trying to have dirty talk.

I feel relieved when I get my period because then I can say I’m just on my period and it’s easy. I feel immense guilt for not wanting to have sex or not feeling turned on. I just want things to work how they’re supposed to. I’m not super young and I want this relationship to work. I know in the past I was very vibrant and intense sexually. I felt passion and creativity. I think past me would gasp at the idea of not having sex on my period, or not wanting to have sex at all. I went from threesomes, chastity cages and dog collars to putting on sweatpants and hoping my boyfriend falls asleep on the couch.

How can I find arousal again? What do I do with these intense feelings of shame? I feel like I’m fighting my body and I’ve tried everything.

I am a full time glasses wearer. I got a new pair in June and I can safely say I just don’t like them.

I can see out of them well but I hate the way they make my face look and the way the frame covers so much. I just feel bummed out all the time about it. I’ve considered getting another pair but with my Rx it’ll be 150 bucks even online and part of me feels like that’s a waste of money. I will have to save some and won’t be able to get another pair for a month or two.

Has anyone made this mistake before? I went back and forth on it for a while but I’ve come to the conclusion I don’t like them at all.

I didn’t want it to be true but yes, warby parker glasses are lower quality than they used to be. I have a pair from 2 years ago vs a pair I purchased in May and the AR coating is much much worse. I compared the two frames after being annoyed by reflections. The new pair’s AR coating is much brighter/reflective and the glare is stronger when looking at them side by side in the light and wearing them looking in a mirror. Even my dad when seeing me with the new ones for the first time mentioned how “cool” the green and purple reflection on my glasses looked. This really shouldn’t be noticeable at all. The glare from overheard lights or lights from the side show as little green dots in my peripheral vision, this has never happened before in any of the 15+ pairs I’ve owned in the past. (As in no dots at all). In fact when comparing to all my glasses the new warby parker has the worst AR coating even from eyebuydirect.

Not only that but I already have a scratch on one of the lenses and I baby the hell out of them. Only gentle soap and a microfiber cloth. I used to fall asleep with my old pair on, clean them with my shirt, drop them and once lost them under the bed for 3 days face down with zero scratching until the last 6 months I worse them. (And I wore them almost daily. I wore by back up when I lost the other pair)

On top of that I have prism in my lenses. This is a 7-10 dollar upcharge on eyebuydirect, Zenni, Payne glasses and firmoo. It’s a 50 dollar upcharge from WP and it’s extremely annoying to get it. You have to message them and tell them you’re okay with an up charge instead of adding it at the end or you’ll wait weeks with delays for your frames.

It sucks because I LOVED this brand for over a decade and swore by them even when I worked in other optical stores. I preferred them over glasses I got at other brick and mortar stores or online stores. Their styles are super cute and fit me well, but this will probably be my last pair.
I can no longer recommend them. You can get better quality and better price anywhere else.

I understand this company has never been profitable but it used to be amazing for the consumer. I just don’t see how no longer having home try on, having less customization, lower quality and higher pricing compared to all other online glasses retailers is going to be good for them. It’s like they are trying to be the jack of all trades by having online and physical stores and “affordability” and doing none of them particularly well.

I’m 30 and a woman. I’ve known that I’ve been attracted to women basically my entire life. I had a secret girlfriend in highschool for an about a month and then we broke up and sort of had a “heated rivalry” dynamic with for about 5 years. Eventually se became platonic best friends. I was desperately in love with a separate college dorm mate but at the time was in denial about it even when she tried to kiss me. I pushed her away because I was scared of my feelings for her. I had sex with a handful of women in my early 20s. All casual encounters.

I’ve always had an intense layer of shame and secrecy around the queer parts of myself. For a long time I told myself the gay sex didn’t “count” or that it was practice until I had sex with a man. I also considered myself a virgin until I lost my male penetration virginity at 21. Though I was having lesbian sex since I was 16. I was not out, I never told my family and I didn’t tell any friends. Even in college I didn’t tell a soul until I met my first boyfriend at 21 who happened to be bi as well. To this day I’m pretty secretive about it, even though other queer people tend to read me as a lesbian before I say anything about it.

I’ve had many longterm male partners. I’m currently in a 4 year LTR with a man. I think I heavily prioritized dating men for the social privilege and sense of safety. I was bullied horrifically for being fat and tall growing up. I desperately wanted male attention as I felt I had no value unless a man found me attractive which they did not until I was older. I was terrified no man would want me. When I was younger it became this goal, that to be normal and get anywhere I would have a boyfriend. I worked really hard to find straight relationships. Though 2/4 later ended up transitioning after we broke up.

Perhaps it’s overthinking, or some sort of OCD but I find myself yearning to be a lesbian and yet terrified of the prospect. Not that I am scared to date women or that it’s interesting, just that my life would fall apart. My relationship would end and where would I live and what would I do? I stay up late at night watching crappy 2000s lesbian movies. I read sapphic novels and fantasize about coming home to a woman. That I have some amazing career I always wanted and come home to a lady who’s thrilled to see me. That I can just breathe. For years I would fantasize that some magic spell turned my boyfriend into a girl and I would play it in my head before I fell asleep. I told my boyfriend about it, though he just said he was flattered and wasn’t upset.

I used to easily have sex with men as long as kink was involved. But with my boyfriend sex is so painful I actually went to the doctor and she said everything was normal but that I just wasn’t turned on enough, this worries me. That maybe it’s because he’s a guy I can’t “get there”.

I often wonder with my female friendships if I have romantic feelings or not. When I do find myself sexually attracted to a woman I know I tend to feel extremely embarrassed and creepy about it. I think about if I would be happier or more free or if I actually like men as much I felt I did when I was younger.

Are these feelings normal? Is this apart of being bi? Maybe I’m second guessing myself or overthinking it.

Okay so yeah pretty much everything is worse now. But I’d like to highlight some products I feel haven’t gotten worse. (As in they don’t taste any different from the original or they work as well or their isn’t MASSIVE shrinkflation happening).

Club Crackers
Dawn Dish Soap
Skittles
Tony’s Chocolonely (I really think this is the only chocolate that isn’t cheap tasting and sickly sweet anymore RIP dove, toblerone, and Kit Kats)

Zeelool has a pair of frames I’ve been looking all over for since my favorite Warby Parker pair got discontinued. I have a big head and I was FINALLY able to find the same frame style with a 54mm lens on Zeelol. The thing is have a low amount of horizontal prism (2.00 diopters) in each eye. I’m curious if anyone has ever ordered prism lenses from them and how did it go?

If push comes to shove I can order them without prism in them and just wear the glasses to events or short durations. As I wore contacts for years with my convergency issues.

I got a new pair of glasses (Lenore) a couple months ago. They are my daily drivers. I’ve noticed I get glare from behind often or I can see the AR in the light like a green dot in my peripherals. I’ve never had this issue before but it happens ALL THE TIME.

For many years i wore the Simon in wide in every color they ever carried (sadly gone from the site RIP I hope they bring wide back please!).

Anyways, is this due to the lens width or the frame or did they change the anti reflective coating to something lower quality? If any has any insights please let me know. I’ve been a diehard fan for 12 years but again I’ve only ever had glare like this with my newest pair.

If you’ve purchased from both which one do you prefer and why? I’m wanting to get a back up pair of frames and I’m unsure where to go. I have a moderate Rx with prism if that helps.