u/helge-a

I (M24) redownloaded Hinge in an effort to pursue a LTR with another guy and I was wondering if anyone out there could validate or relate to my experience because when I say it out loud, it just sounds odd. When you meet someone, flirting and compliments are clear indicators that you like someone. They are normal and should be welcome. But given my dating experience (in particular with dating other gay men), I have gotten to the point where lots of compliments or subtle flirting in the beginning almost turn me off. It reads to me as subtle immaturity and more focus on the physical aspect than the interpersonal one. I used to enjoy flirty exchanges but I just find them boring now. When a man can carry a conversation and focuses on getting to know me, the attraction is enormous. It seems so counter-intuitive but it’s how I feel.

I am a radiology student in Germany and the deeper that we get into material, the less available resources exist online in German. Luckily my native tongue is English but my cohort struggles. A lot of the resources we use are on youtube in German. As I understand it, Youtube on Norway is kind of dead, right? So if you need to learn about cells and there's not much online, do you just look it up in English and translate?

I began reading Der Schatten des Windes, a classic by Carlos Ruiz Zafón and after about 20 pages, I just found the material seemed somehow dry. I read the same passages in the English version and noticed my experience was markedly different. It is often my experience that the English translations seem to flow somehow better and the German translations can be more rigid, but I completely lack any knowledge in linguistics, style, and the field of translation to be certain. Here are two (openly available) passages from the beginning of this book. Do you notice anything stylistically different? Maybe I just find it easier to flow when reading English because it's my native language...

Eng: "'This is a place of mystery, Daniel, a sanctuary. Every book, every volume you see here, has a soul. The soul of the person who wrote it and of those who read it and lived and dreamed with it. Every time a book changes hands, every time someone runs his eyes down its pages, its spirit grows and strengthens. This place was already ancient when my father brought me here for the first time, many years ago. Perhaps as old as the city itself. Nobody knows for certain how long it has existed, or who created it..."

Ger: „Was du hier siehst, Daniel, ist ein geheimer Ort, ein Mysterium. Jedes einzelne Buch hat eine Seele. Die Seele dessen, der es geschrieben hat, und die Seele derer, die es gelesen und erlebt und von ihm geträumt haben. Jedesmal, wenn ein Buch in andere Hände gelangt, jedesmal, wenn jemand den Blick über die Seiten gleiten läßt, wächst sein Geist und wird stark. Schon vor so vielen Jahren, als mein eigener Vater zum ersten Mal mit mir hierherkam, war dieser Ort uralt. Vielleicht so alt wie die Stadt selbst. Niemand weiß mit Bestimmtheit, seit wann es ihn gibt oder wer ihn geschaffen hat."

I downloaded Hinge and am looking for a monogamous relationship. I started texting this guy a few day ago and so far, he seems cool. Very considerate, positive, open, friendly. We discussed doing something this weekend and I said I'd confirm with him what my weekend looks like and he said "Yeah, all good. No rush." I wished him a good day and planned to text him about our plans later on. He texted me yesterday "Hey, how was your day?" and I had such a long, exhausting day around so many loud humans that I didn't respond. I woke up and he sent "Hello?" this morning and somehow, I have instantaneously zero interest to meet. I find "Hello?" texts when I didn't get the chance to respond really uncharming and annoying.