u/joefromreddit

Hi there, I’ve struggled with drug abuse (cocaine and crystal meth) for a very long time.

It’s taken a toll on me in many ways, but the worst is my social skills. I first began using drugs to be better socially, and for a while it worked, but now I’m a bag of nerves whenever I’m on drugs, and a bag of nerves when I’m not, but in a different way. It’s a vicious cycle and it’s affecting my ability to maintain relationships or meet a romantic partner.

I’m wondering, how did your social skills change/improve once you got clean? Was it noticeable?

Doing anything socially, completely sober, is very difficult for me, I can’t even remember how I used to do it before the drugs.

I worry I will be incredibly anxious and awkward, and I imagine that will probably be true for a while.

Hi there

I live in social housing (Clarion) and over the past year my rent arrears has reached nearly £4,000, thanks to years of cocaine and crystal meth abuse.

I had a payment plan in place, to pay my rent and some on top and I was warned if I missed one payment Clarion would take legal action.

I was prescribed ADHD medication recently which helped me manage my addiction and I managed to stick to the payment plan for several months.

Sadly I started using again about a month ago and have missed the rent payment. I don’t even have enough in my bank to pay the rent if I wanted to now, but I could probably afford a token fee of some sort.

My contract at work is also ending this month, which means I could go through a short period of unemployment.

I know I have nobody to blame for this but myself but I am very worried.

My flat means everything to me and it is basically the only thing I have left. The thought of being evicted terrifies me. I am getting drug support and looking to take any job I can.

I called Clarion to explain this, and in fairness they have been very understanding with me, but they said nothing can be done and they will be initiating legal proceedings.

Does anybody have any advice. Thanks

There are two jobs available, they are different roles with a lot of overlapping requirements. One I am probably more qualified for, whereas the other is more of a long shot but something I would prefer.

I would obviously have to write two separate cover letters. It is a small company so I would imagine they will both be looked at by the same person.

Does it look bad, or give off the impression that I am just winging it, to apply for both?

I am having a host of constant, annoying issues with advanced voice mode.

First, I can't use it within the Chatgpt app on my Mac. I have to use it in the browser. I've uninstalled and reinstalled the app but it doesn't make any difference.

Secondly, it goes through periods of glitches. Sometimes it will be absolutely fine for hours on end, the next day it is basically unusable. It will constantly mishear me, or just not respond when I'm talking to it.

Thirdly, is there a way to use it whilst you are on the move, without having to keep the app open?

I should preface by saying i like Mark Langdon and think he’s a great contributor to the pod.

But there is nothing funny about not eating vegetables. He just has an embarrassingly unrefined palette, that you would expect find in an obstinate 12 year old, not a man in his 40s (?). And it’s not as if the other pod members are simply ridiculing him over it. No, Mark himself appears more than willing to go into detail about his diet whenever he’s asked. It’s like listening to somebody brag about how they never read books or tidy their house. It’s utterly pathetic

Then there’s the dangerous. The pod will laugh in disbelief and it is sometimes framed as if he is almost some sort of medical marvel because he’s still breathing. Let’s be clear on this, never eating a vegetable again is unlikely to knock off years off anybody’s life. But it can lead serious health issues and can massively decrease the quality of life you live. It is (sort of) acknowledged by the pod that it is a bad lifestyle choice, but I suspect some listeners will take from it that vegetables simply arent as important we were lead to believe. As a result, they might be less inclined to eat vegetables themselves, or worse, feed them to their children. It’s a dangerous, extreme lifestyle choice and something that should not be encouraged or celebrated in any way.

And if one day Langdon is to suffer a stroke or heart disease then i expect these recurring ‘segments’ wil make for a very uncomfortable listen back

I have always known of him but recently did a deep dive.

I find it hard to believe anyone would like him, even if they shared his politics.

I’ve never encountered a human being so smug and smarmy. He appears so deeply unlikeable that I have to assume some of it is put on, but to what end?

The audience in his studio seem to find him funny but I suspect that’s because they are paid to.

But are people eagerly tuning in to hear Bill’s take on things? I’m amazed he has a popular television show and sometimes respectable guests will talk with him.

EDIT:
Sorry I should clarify I’m talking strictly about Bill’s personality, not his politics, but I appreciate they are intertwined in some ways.
He has a way of speaking that I assumed human beings were almost hard wired to recoil from.
I don’t know what he is like as a person, but his on camera persona is just seems completely radioactive to me.

I love how comfortable my Herman Miller Mirra is, but I hate how it looks. It’s black and very bulky and not in keeping with the rest of my room.

Does anybody have any tips or ideas on how to change its appearance?

I considered painting it but I’m told that the back, despite feeling like hard plastic to me, is in fact slightly flexible so the paint would eventually crack.

Alternatively is there so nice chair covers? I can’t find anything online.

Thanks!

If, say, me and a friend are discussing something, and the friend shares a fact with me that I already knew, my natural instinct is to go ‘yeah I knew that’, or something to that effect.

I’m sure it’s a pretty human response and something most people would do.

But as I’ve got older, I’ve began to wonder if it’s more socially mature to pretend I didn’t know said fact.

It feels like it’s going against all of my instincts, and there is something mildly annoying about said friend thinking you didn’t know something that you in fact did know.

But in reality, what does it matter. It makes the friend feel better because they think they shared a new, interesting fact, and it makes me look like less of an arsehole, because saying ‘yeah I knew that’ always looks a bit arseholey.

Anyone feel the same?

If, say, me and a friend are discussing something, and the friend shares a fact with me that I already knew, my natural instinct is to go ‘yeah I knew that’, or something to that effect.

I’m sure it’s a pretty human response and something most people would do.

But as I’ve got older, I’ve began to wonder if it’s more socially mature to pretend I didn’t know said fact.

It feels like it’s going against all of my instincts, and there is something mildly annoying about said friend thinking you didn’t know something that you in fact did know.

But in reality, what does it matter. It makes the friend feel better because they think they shared a new, interesting fact, and it makes me look like less of an arsehole, because saying ‘yeah I knew that’ always looks a bit arseholey.

Anyone feel the same?

I’ve never come across somebody with such an authentic enthusiasm for their interviewee. Needless to say, musicians are not always the most straightforward and plain speaking people in the world, and yet somehow he manages to read their vibe and translate their thoughts into plain english for the listener. Masterful stuff

Zohran Mamdani was famously a rapper before going into politics and I can’t help but think it’s that love of the genre that has influenced his brilliant oratory skills.

Watching his recent speech at the Knicks parade, ‘It’s in the 0.4% that we go to work’ sounded like it could have been lifted straight from a rap song.

Or his iconic ‘turn the volume up’ line after winning the mayoralty.

I’m also reminded of Killer Mikes brilliant speech on the Sanders campaign rally (‘That firewall about to crack’).

I feel like rappers and fans of the genre have an ear for great lines that cut through the noise and stick in the memory.

Do you agree?

Hi all, I’ve recently acquired a fairly large sum of money and am looking to pay off all of my debts (somewhere around £15k in total, shared between 10 different creditors).

I have spoken with Stepchange, who manage my debt repayment plan, and they have advised me to go to each creditor individually and ask for a settlement fee, which could be lower than the actual amount owed.

Does anybody have any advice before I do? And perhaps a template for a letter I could send to each of them?

Thanks!

I’m not interested in examples, or about the confidence it’s said with, but more how a languages professor might define good dirty talk.

What are the common semantic and grammatical themes, for example?

One I’ve noticed is using your partner as the direct object of a verb - ‘I want to taste you’ always sounds hotter than ‘I want to taste your pussy’.

hi everyone. I’m a 33 year old male. for a long time i struggled with maintaining an erection. i never had any trouble getting an erection, but keeping it up was always very hard (sorry, lol). most of this has been a psychological problem more than a physiological one; i often get ‘into my head’ a bit too much when having sex.

a couple of years ago i started using viagra (the super strength black ones) and suddenly i was rock hard all night. it meant i would very rarely ejaculate, but i would really enjoy giving my partner a good time.

oddly, i would still have no trouble masturbating, so sometimes i would ask her to kiss me whilst i do that to finish myself off, but sometimes, understandably, that would make her wonder if the reason i haven’t ejaculated is something wrong with her, which it isn’t.

anyway, the other day my and my partner did a big weekend bender, having long sex sessions and using recreational drugs (GHB, coke, Mdma) and viagra. we had a great time but i did not ejaculate once. the next morning i woke up with the worst blue balls i have ever had - so bad we had to go to A&E. it’s subsided now but it’s got me thinking i need some sort of a reset.

i feel like my problem is a combination of self monitoring, a lingering sexual insecurity about my performance (which is odd, becuase in many ways i feel very confident sexually) and a reliance on viagra and drugs (i use GHB a lot when i have sex).

i would like to take less drugs during sex, but it feels like the problems i had in the first place have only compounded in the time i have been using drugs. without GHB i’m even more in my head. without viagra it’s virtually impossible to maintain an erection. i don’t have a ‘fixed’ sexual partner as such and it’s not easy to say ‘hey i usually use viagra bit im not going to now, so bare with me if i can’t get hard and spend the whole time inside my own head’ lol

i know it’s easy to say ‘use less drugs’ but as anyone who has experienced any kind of drug dependency will know, that answer is never rally sufficient.

so quite a messy one but any tips on how i to sort myself out? thanks!

perhaps more than just ‘stop doing drigs’ i’d like to hear from people who have been in a smililar position , and hear how they dealt with it!

I tend to go through extended periods of solitude, keeping to myself and focusing on work, and periods where I go out a lot, party, mingle with people, etc.

when I go through periods of keeping to myself, I often find in the few occasions when I am out with other people I am more anxious, awkward, and overthink social interactions a lot.

however when I am in a more social phase, I don't worry about them as much. I have less time to think about that awkward conversation I had with somebody because I am busy hanging about with somebody else.

I realise I'm probably answering my own question here! But I was wondering if it is more of a placebo thing, or if there's some science behind it. Does anybody else have the same experience? Would be very interested to know.

I tend to go through extended periods of solitude, keeping to myself and focusing on work, and periods where I go out a lot, party, mingle with people, etc.

when I go through periods of keeping to myself, I often find in the few occasions when I am out with other people I am more anxious, awkward, and overthink social interactions a lot.

however when I am in a more social phase, I don't worry about them as much. I have less time to think about that awkward conversation I had with somebody because I am busy hanging about with somebody else.

I realise I'm probably answering my own question here! But I was wondering if it is more of a placebo thing, or if there's some science behind it. Does anybody else have the same experience? Would be very interested to know.