u/LastLibrary9508

I’m looking for a gym closer to me and curious what the vibes are. I don’t need a fancy gym but something that isn’t insanely crowded when work gets out. I’m also a teacher and want to avoid seeing my students and families if possible!

Always loved teaching at my school but it got cliquey last year when a group of middle school teachers moved up and became the “cool mean girls.” I was friends with them for the first month of school and they suddenly stopped talking to me one day. I had a lot of other friends including my best friend with me there, so I didn’t mind.

This year their group expanded and they immediately took in some of the new teachers. It’s a Gen Z clique and I try to be friendly but they won’t acknowledge me first, even if we’re the only two in the room. Other teachers with my similar personality have picked up on their clique-ness but the mean girls teachers are still pleasant to them and overtly extroverted and social to them. But not to me for some reason — I’m invisible?

I’m bubbly and popular with the students and with a lot of the older staff. My ADHD comes out at work and it helps me be extroverted. I crash when I come home and go back to my introverted ADHD self. Before these mean girls came, we didn’t have any social rankings in the staff and I could easily talk to anyone. Now it’s cold and awkward and I have to compliment them to engage them in conversation at all. Like they literally won’t look up from their phones if I ask a question.

I was talking to a safe older coworker today who sticks to herself and is similar to my mom. We were talking about the clique-ness that’s developed and I said it’s frustrating that they almost speak down to me. And she goes, they think you’re younger than them.

I’m 36. I have a baby face, I’m short, but at the same time, I’m well respected in our district by higher up. They respect my intelligence and take me seriously? But for some reason this clique thinks I’m fresh out of college so they don’t even acknowledge me as anything but a random new teacher. I’ve been teaching for 14 years!

Has anyone had this problem with NTs patronizing them or writing them off as naive and young? It’s so hard to be taken seriously but to know these mean girls think I’m somehow below them really hurts? If reminds me when I was undiagnosed in middle school and couldn’t figure out why girls were both fascinated and repulsed by my presence.

I just plugged mine in before bed and the light started to fade in and out. When I went to unplug it to reset it, the back felt red hot. I’m going to keep it unplugged tonight but is it normal for it to heat up? It reminds me of my old MacBook charger becoming burning hot.

Do you know how long the vomit tends to last?

I only vomited once in the past on the shot — my first ever shot when I tried it two years ago — and never had problems since, even on upping the dose. I had eaten a very tomato heavy meal before it.

I drank yesterday which was silly but have drank before on the shot no problems. I can’t keep water down today and tried yogurt and immediately threw it up. I also returned to work (teacher) and was in a room for two days with hundreds of people so I’m not sure if it’s just the shot or something else

I restarted my dose last night and I haven’t been able to keep food down since. I can’t even drink water and throw up yellow liquid bile if I do get a gulp of water in. I just tried to eat yogurt and threw it up just now.

Do you have any suggestions on what to eat so it stays down? Or how to drink water?

I only threw up the very first time I tried it about a year and a half ago. I had to go home early from work and was eventually able to keep a Diet Coke down after 24 hours

How many of y’all have twin beds in your small apartments and studios? My bedroom is extremely tiny and my full bed means all my bedroom furniture is stacked side by side like legos. I’m in the market for a new bed frame because I’m tired of my cheap Amazon metal bed frame shaking from the vibrations when my roommate walks around. I want something sturdier and am really interested in the Japanese joinery style frames!

I had a twin bed in my 20s and didn’t mind it at all (as a 5’0 girly) but oddly feel weird about it in my 30s? I’m not dating anyone at the moment and usually sleep over other people’s places when that happens, but I just feel strange bringing a date home to a twin sized bed, which feels so irrational? I want more floor space but I’m also interested in buying something sturdier like a Thuma, that I can keep for a long time.

Do I give myself 14 more inches of floor space or just bite the bullet and get a full? I’m renting a room with roommates right now and would like to eventually get a studio or one bedroom, but I’m on a teacher’s salary 🥲

Would love to hear your thoughts on twin beds and if anyone of y’all have one! Thanks so much!!

Customizing my FFF box for the Fall and I'm curious about this. I don't like anything else in this category and am interested in the pink eye balm, but I have really dry eyes. The wind makes my eyes cry, as well as when it's bright out. If I get sun screen near my eye, it also starts tearing. I tried a cooling plumping highlighter from another brand and my eyes did start to water a little.

I like methol everywhere else but worried it will trigger tears. For those who have sensitive dry eyes, what were your thoughts with this product?

Returned two pairs of shoes and never got a refund. Spoke to the merchant and they said they processed the refund. I waited a month, and never got it. Reached out to After Pay and they said they can't do anything because the order is 120 days old (it was on a six month payment plan, my last payment hasn't happened yet!!!).

What do I do? Who should I keep pushing? I'm owed about $150 which is significant money.

I had a JCrew card that was auto-paid every month and after my last payment, they closed it. I hadn't used it for a year but had it for maybe 10 years and had used it frequently in the past. Did I learn a bad lesson that I had to use it in the year? Do I need to use it every few months? My credit score obviously went up when they closed the account.

Thanks -- I'm not great with money but I'm trying to finally take charge right now and want to know how to do better next time and keep the card open.

I had bad credit and needed this in an emergency. It honestly helped and I've drawn from it when I had another emergency. I'd like to pay it off more quickly because I pay 207 every two weeks, but I've only contributed 120 toward the entire loan. I'm trying to calculate a better way to pay it off but they don't have any details or the APR in the contract for me to figure it out? The fee is 171 per billing period, but besides that, the statements are almost predatorily unhelpful and lacking any information to figure out the length of the loan. I've used other payday loans in the past and at least they told you the payoff calendar.

Can anyone whose used Credit fresh help me figure out the APR or anything else needed so I can figure out the repayment using this calculator? https://www.calculator.net/repayment-calculator.html

One of my coworkers suddenly left and we have to hire someone to fill his role. I’ve been thinking about it all week and I reached out to my boss asking if I could take one of his classes if possible (we’re teachers). I worked with the same students last year, have an amazing rapport with them, and I know the class well enough. I decided to ask my boss today about if it was a possibility and I feel so MUCH shame, almost like I asked out a crush who was popular (I know it’s not a relevant match but that’s just how it feels).

I feel absolutely silly for asking about it at all and I keep beating myself metaphorically. I feel so stupid for no reason. Obviously it’s the weekend and they’d have to even see if it’s feasible based on the master schedule, but I’m so embarrassed I asked?

I tried to interrogate this feeling and why it might be causing shame and my imposter syndrome is definitely at the root. I’m not sure why I can’t feel brave and proud instead because I never speak up. I tried to ask why this causes shame or why I’m embarrassed and a few parts spoke at once but didn’t really name themselves. They’re worried about messing up or they don’t feel worthy so they feel it was embarrassing to even bring it up. I tried to remind them this is brave and how much I grew this year by taking a risk but they didn’t really want to talk about it and I’m still sitting with immense shame almost 8 hours later.

Can anyone help walk me through this feeling with questions for my parts or if you’ve experienced similar situation?

All of my friendships have been made through seeing each other in a common setting over time, so I’ve always been able to keep lots of friends as a teen and when I was involved with undergrad/grad school. But now that I don’t have those obligations, it’s really hard for me to make new friends. When I moved to a new city, all of my friends were my coworkers. I tend to rely on them for my friendship needs and get sad/envious when they have their other friendship groups. My friend showed me a glimpse of his group chat with his other friends and I realized I never really was in a group chat or had a circle of friends like that once grad school ended.

How do you do this organically? I’ve met friends of friends but I never know how to develop the relationship so it goes from acquaintance to someone who is down to go on a walk or grab a drink with. Or someone I know I can have a “gossip” chat with. Instead my friends live far away or have little free time so we share memes and do surface level catch-ups when we have time, and it doesn’t feel like enough.

My adhd makes me extroverted but then I have a social battery that makes me want to stay in all weekend to recuperate from work. But I’ve been feeling genuinely lonely and miss having a community that’s organic and always there.

For anyone especially who moved to a major city without knowing anyone, how do you make actual friends beyond coworkers? I don’t really have any hobbies that you do with other people and meet groups feel so awkward and artificial and would make my social anxiety flare

My roommate is fine, just loud in everything she does. She opens and closes her dresser drawers like her room’s on fire and sends them sliding hard back into the dresser so I feel the impact through my wall. She stomps around the 3x4 square feet each of us has by our bed in our tiny rooms (her layout is similar to mine) and my floor shakes from her slamming her foot down. Like my bed will move and it will wake me out of sleep with a loud noise machine when she does it.

I talked to her when she moved in if she could close her doors more quietly because she slams them (and the bathroom & i’m sandwiched between both rooms) because it feels like my door is the one getting slammed, and she said her door doesn’t do that and got defensive.

Anyway it’s just fun to have someone blast out of their room at 1:15am and throw their door open and shut and shake you out of sleep. Are people not conscious of making this much noise? Our household goes to bed at 12 so she know we’re all asleep.

I teach an AP class to the entire grade at a title 1 school, and this was my first time teaching this particular content class. Our students tend to score a lot lower than the national average and we usually have maybe 15-20 students who score a 3 or higher out of 90 or so in the grade. This particular group of students have been one of our weaker performing classes in recent history. I’m anticipating a LOT a less than previous years, and while I know it’s the context of the students this year, I’m terrified to see the scores and see it as a reflection of me.

Anyone in the same boat or have any advice? Thanks!

Edit: 20 passed and a bunch got 4s!! I’m so proud of them!!

Been searching for plain, unflavored sparkling water and they always have a faint lemon note or they taste slightly acidic. Are there any brands that make an unflavored version that truly tastes like water with that nice crispy bubbles? Thanks!!

Envy and disappointment are two emotions that are ridiculously hard for me to process and transition on from. When they happen, it feels so incredibly somatic and I find myself worked up with tons of energy that is hard to manage and work through. Both lead to anger, something that is admittedly hard for me to process because I wasn’t allowed to feel anger as a child. Regardless, the anger feels disproportionately intense when I feel either envious or disappointed. I then feel a lot of shame and self hatred while still riding this intensely angry wave.

For instance, I’m a teacher and we just got some end of the year data back, and almost 2/3rds of the school got shoutouts. My class wasn’t part of the data, so I wasn’t necessarily relevant, but I almost never get included in the shoutouts and it reinforces a kind of “I’m not seen” inferiority feeling that makes me feel dumb and useless. One teacher in teacher in particular who I know to not be the best was included (they have an insanely easy final) and it for some reason filled me with envy and almost a rage and soul-sucking shame? It feels like an over-reaction, I know it to be an over-reaction, but something is triggered and screaming, and I don’t know how to work with it through this feeling.

Any suggestions, please let me know!

Envy and disappointment are two emotions that are ridiculously hard for me to process and transition on from. When they happen, it feels so incredibly somatic and I find myself worked up with tons of energy that is hard to manage and work through. Both lead to anger, something that is admittedly hard for me to process because I wasn’t allowed to feel anger as a child. Regardless, the anger feels disproportionately intense when I feel either envious or disappointed. And it’s hard to talk to the part(s) or listen to its anger when the part(s) tries to project it back toward me, as if it’s angry with me. I then feel a lot of shame and self hatred while still riding this intensely angry wave.

For instance, I’m a teacher and we just got some end of the year data back, and almost 2/3rds of the school got shoutouts. My class wasn’t part of the data, so I wasn’t necessarily relevant, but I almost never get included in the shoutouts and it reinforces a kind of “I’m not seen” inferiority feeling that makes me feel dumb and useless. One teacher in teacher in particular who I know to not be the best was included (they have an insanely easy final) and it for some reason filled me with envy and almost a rage and soul-sucking shame? It feels like an over-reaction, I know it to be an over-reaction, but this part is triggered and screaming, and I don’t know how to work with it through this feeling.

Any suggestions, please let me know! I’m pretty aware it knows I’m “judging” it for feeling so triggered but it’s hard when I’m frustrated by such a small event.

Was supposed to hang out with one of my close friends today. I was going to visit him camping. He texted me last night excited to show off the location and didn’t reply back (or saw) my messages (one saying it looked great and another asking what time/details for us meeting up).

I have things I can do anyway so it’s not the end of the world, but I’m autistic and hate the waiting space between plans. I also don’t like the weird absence because I’m not sure what it could mean? He’s pretty avoidant and has his own issues but our friendship feels solid and I know I’m a safe person for him. Do I triple text to check in? Not sure what I would say. Or do I wait until I see him again with our friends on Monday?

I’m in NYC and have been counting down since the release. There’s some stuff I already love and would blind buy, but I can’t wait to try the other things like blushes and lipsticks