u/LoudDream2916

Can't find much about the maker besides a facebook page.

Sadly, the creator of these passed back in 2023

Probably gonna hunt down some like 5th edition marines to pop these on.

So I forgot to finish typing out this shit before posting last time, so lemme do it now and update yall.

here's what i posted last time:

tldr, my aunt is the reason my grandma and i fight constantly. i told my grandma to either get my aunt a place or i'd shoot my aunt.

i cant do anything in my own home without having to put up with my druggie aunt. Shes nasty, smokes in the house while knowing i have asthma, sleeps and eats, and get high off weed. all while she scrolls thru tiktok with her phone, tablet, and my moms tv on full volume for hours.

i cant use my own kitchen without having to clean up after her. shes fuckin 60. shes fully ruined my dishwasher, full of dead bugs and grime.

her room, which was my dead mom's that my grandma and i said we were gonna leave untouched after her death, is now full of rats and garbage.

i gotta spray down everything in my living room and wipe down my kitchen everytime she goes thru

she stinks of smoke so fuckin badly.

she came up here February 3rd, 2021, and has finally hit rock bottom tonight

she knows i dont want her near me, she makes my ocd and anxiety freak the fuck out. anytime she gets a chance, she shoves her phone in my face to look at some shitty ai slop she found on tiktok.

anytime she does, it triggers my fight or flight and my heart starts beating so hard and fast that i feel like im on the verge of a heartattack

weve fought and screamed at each other repeatedly for years because of this

she did the shit tonight, knowing i cant see because my glasses broke, and made me have a full on panic attack

knocked a hole in the wall next to me because of it

i was borderline asleep when she came in here and the sound of her stupid ass shoes on my shitty kitchen floor, because she wears her shoes in my house 24/7, has genuinely traumatized me. makes me panic so bad that ive tried killing myself over having to be around her anymore

my grandma has recently finally bought a trailer for us to live in, and despite how bad it is on me being forced to live with my aunt, she wants to shove all 3 of us into a single-wide trailer

she said she couldve got me my own but didnt. the one she means is only $9500. wtf.

so i lost my fucking mind.

told her in the morning either she gets my aunt that trailer and puts her out, or im shooting my aunt. i genuinely dont give a fuck about her anymore. dont care if i end up in prison, aint like i give a fuck about myself anymore.

ive lost all enjoyment outta life and its because of her. cant eat, cant sleep, cant take a bath, cant watch anything or read, cant play anything or even paint. everytime i try anything, im just so depressed that i wanna blow my brains out instead. ive become so cold to everything and everyone.

THE UPDATE/THE REST OF MY POST THAT MY DUMBASS DIDNT TYPE OUT LAST TIME

I was bullshitting them. There is no gun. Never was.

They didn't know that tho, so we made a deal.

I get my entire check now, will be living with them until my apartment application is accepted/get my interview email.

Both me and my aunt are saving money, and whoever gets the money to move out first will do so. I'll deal with my folks til then.

SO TECHNICALLY A WIN.

BOUT FUCKIN TIME

Bought myself a 30k Leviathan Dread and a blue glass Mosser kitten to celebrate,
Things are actually looking up for once. pic included of the kitty.

I am currently searching for an authentic Victorian-era vial of London Purple pigment.

Does anyone here have any advise on how/where I'd maybe find some?

Image is from A Brush with Bekah's video on the color.

Gonna hang this soon to be big yellow bastard from my ceiling when its done.

tldr, my aunt is the reason my grandma and i fight constantly. i told my grandma to either get my aunt a place or i'd shoot my aunt.

i cant do anything in my own home without having to put up with my druggie aunt. Shes nasty, smokes in the house while knowing i have asthma, sleeps and eats, and get high off weed. all while she scrolls thru tiktok with her phone, tablet, and my moms tv on full volume for hours.

i cant use my own kitchen without having to clean up after her. shes fuckin 60. shes fully ruined my dishwasher, full of dead bugs and grime.

her room, which was my dead mom's that my grandma and i said we were gonna leave untouched after her death, is now full of rats and garbage.

i gotta spray down everything in my living room and wipe down my kitchen everytime she goes thru

she stinks of smoke so fuckin badly.

she came up here February 3rd, 2021, and has finally hit rock bottom tonight

she knows i dont want her near me, she makes my ocd and anxiety freak the fuck out. anytime she gets a chance, she shoves her phone in my face to look at some shitty ai slop she found on tiktok.

anytime she does, it triggers my fight or flight and my heart starts beating so hard and fast that i feel like im on the verge of a heartattack

weve fought and screamed at each other repeatedly for years because of this

she did the shit tonight, knowing i cant see because my glasses broke, and made me have a full on panic attack

knocked a hole in the wall next to me because of it

i was borderline asleep when she came in here and the sound of her stupid ass shoes on my shitty kitchen floor, because she wears her shoes in my house 24/7, has genuinely traumatized me. makes me panic so bad that ive tried killing myself over having to be around her anymore

my grandma has recently finally bought a trailer for us to live in, and despite how bad it is on me being forced to live with my aunt, she wants to shove all 3 of us into a single-wide trailer

she said she couldve got me my own but didnt. the one she means is only $9500. wtf.

so i lost my fucking mind.

told her in the morning either she gets my aunt that trailer and puts her out, or im shooting my aunt. i genuinely dont give a fuck about her anymore. dont care if i end up in prison, aint like i give a fuck about myself anymore.

ive lost all enjoyment outta life and its because of her. cant eat, cant sleep, cant take a bath, cant watch anything or read, cant play anything or even paint. everytime i try anything, im just so depressed that i wanna blow my brains out instead. ive become so cold to everything and everyone.

Honestly, is wanting to be off on my own too much to ask? Just wanting peace, and to be actually happy for once? It's something I've wanted so fucking bad for over a decade at this point.

I've tried to off myself countless times, ran away twice, had fights with my own family where everyone just gangs up on me to keep me in my place. I'm just so over it all. I've screamed, cried, begged and pleaded, I've got so ungodly angry at this shit I've punched holes in walls. Nothing works.

Everyday since I came to my grandma's back in fall of 2015 has been a challenge, it was fine back then but has gotten worse over the last few years.

When I got my OCD back in fall of 2018, she started treating me like everything I did was aimed at her and took it personally. Since then, she and I argue over this constantly and I've been treated like its my fault for having it in the first place.

I was going to a community college to finish out getting my highschool diploma. I had 6 months left, I got OCD and had a full on mental breakdown one morning soon after and had to drop out,

She tells me that "you don;t know anything about the world!", I'm 26, almost 27 and anything I don't know is because no-one ever taught me anything. They babied me for 20+ years and never thought if that's what I actually wanted. Hell, none of my family ever even taught me to tie my fucking shoes, it was my uncle's ex girlfriend.

Everytime I bring up wanting free from this cycle, she gets so pissed off and huffy, says she'll help me get a place. She's been saying and doing this for at minimum a year and a half.

I truly do not believe I'll ever be allowed to be free.

Can't power it on or open it if I do get it on. FML.

She has this shitty table by the front door that shes cried over more than she has me. I've had a borderline heart attack, heart in my throat, cant breathe worth a damn. She didn't act like i existed.

She also had a bunch of these heavy ceramic bowls/plates on the porch, piled up the walls with everything else. Its so bad you can barely walk. They've been out there at least a year, and now someone stole one. She's cried over these grime covered, nasty fucking plates that will sit somewhere til she's dead, that will more than likely get thrown out or sent to a thrift store. Cried more for them than she has the entire time I've been struggling with my heart.

I'm in my shitty ratfucked recliner in the livingroom, heart beating out of my chest, and she couldn't care less.

I've been trying to get myself a place, but there isn't an apartment around here that isn't $900+ a month. The one place I found for $650, requirements include satisfactory background & credit check, a minimum credit score of 600, and four times the rent in monthly gross income. ($2600)

I only get $1000 a month. Disability Check.

Can't get a car, no license and the person I was talking to about an old jeep never got back to me.

Anytime I bring up wanting/needing to leave and get my own place she gets all defensive and pissy. She's said she'll just leave and then I'll be happy.

If she leaves I'll KMS 1000%. Rents $400 here, the house is falling in, no bathhtub, no way to get any food, no way to my doctor. I rely on her for nearly everything despite how bad she treats me.

I'm so fucking tired.

PLEASE IF YOU COMMENT, DON'T POST A SPOILER

Wanted to read Space Marine as my first, but couldn't find a pdf of it.

I fuckin love how campy it is, then got hit by a virus bomb in a certain scene with the assassin.

Good book so far, but that part was a shock to say the DAMN least.

Didn't like the twist, but still got the rest of this book and the next two to go, so it'll probably pan out.

Was gonna grab a copy of the trilogy off ebay and maybe wanted 1st prints, only listing for all three is $1100. Well, shit.

Decided to add some more greebles and details to my most recent build, he just didn't feel finished.

Once again, this uses u/_Ryloren_'s Mata revamps as a framework.
Please yall, go build some of her revamps, they're fantastic.

They had him, another blood raven, a space wolf, and a dark angel with a beakie helm.

​

They were all $50.

​

Wish I'd bought them all.

Nothing really changed, I'm in my room now.

We argued more.

I said fuck it and just got me a shitty wipe down bath and went to bed.

I feel about 75% better, but this shit is an Ouroboros and will unfortunately probably won't be the last time.

Its also like 100 fucking degrees, so there's that.

As for the mini...its...alright?

As much as I love nurgle stuff...like....standard death guard is just boring to paint to me.

I love painting 30k DG, and all the weird warbands nurgle has like the Plaguebones and the Plaguewrought Brethern.

But 40k DG just isn't it for me.

Got 4 more to paint like this tho, so what do y'all think?

Working on the Project Forerunner: REBIRTH builds again, its been incredibly hard this year to build things. Just haven't had the motivation.

Built off of u/Ryloren on reddit's Mata revamp framework, her revamps are awesome.

The old primer STILL won't come off this little bastard.

I have been babied since I was a kid.

Can't drive, no one ever bothered to teach me.

No money, never had a job.

One friend, had another but he became a nazi.

Get yelled at for my OCD, anxiety, depression.

Get complained at for eating, how much I eat, what i eat, when I eat. I've stress ate til I'm 300lbs.

Got abandoned at 15 by my mom in 2015 after my dad died in 2011, she went south and stayed with her new abusive boyfriend.

Came back after 3 years, we made back up and were best friends like before.

She died in 2020 from a heart attack, her new boyfriend was a methhead. He did something to her, never got proof tho. He used to come around quite often, haven't seen him in 6 years. Actually pretty nice guy overall tho.

She was the voice of reason is this clusterfuck.

26, almost 27 with no life experience.

My trailer i live in is actively falling apart, full of bugs and rats, and have had multiple wild animals get in and had to be removed by me by hand.

2 birds, 2 raccoons, and the neighbors cat have all came in thru the truck tire-sized hole in my closets ceiling.

No bathtub, have been taking wipe off baths in my bathroom sink since fall of 2024.

Bathtub collapsed with me in it and almost killed me.

Have been going to a local hotel for a few months to get a bath. Only can go once a month, if even that. Grandma bitches at me the entire time til we get to the room, we're fine while we're there, and she starts back on me the moment we leave.

Expected to move into a rough ass neighborhood with my entire family, uncle, both aunts, grandma, cousins and all drugs and drama included.

3 trailers on an acre and a half.

Also expected to clean up behind/take care of my grandma that yells at me and my druggie aunt.

Have been depression camping in my living room for going on 6 months, been in my room only like 7 times the whole year.

Ive ran away twice, took more pills than I can count trying to KMS, and have genuinely lost interest in most things in life.

Can't legally be on my own, my ocd and all that is why, will end up marked as a Ward of the State.

On disability, get 1k a month. Cheapest studio apartment here is $700 a month. On food stamps, get $24 a month.

Haven't had a decent meal in a long time.

Mostly fucking ramen and DIY crunchwraps, and sugary shit.

I have to fake being happy an unhealthy amount.

All this, just to ask the question.

What the fuck is the point of this?

Was it worth it, depriving me of a life, so that I would be "protected "?

While also being abused? The fuck?

Armorcast Chaos Reaver Titan!

Got it from a real nice dude off Facebook, gonna paint it allied to the Death Guard.

Did not even know it existed til yesterday, and found a single one on ebay.

I guess I'm painting it a deep purple and edge highlighting it pink.

$130 and I genuinely can't believe I own it.

Its coming out of Nottingham too!

Want to keep him blue, but not Ultramarines. So who do I paint them as?

Also it is missing the second gun, how hard do y'all think it'll be to hunt one down?

Plan is to strip them and repaint them using a sponge, just copying the current scheme back onto them but in better quality.

I'm also gonna try to get 2 more so i can run 3 3-man squads of them.

I'll also paint the squad leaders in the purple that one of the seven has on it.

I also seem to have the blades off the old Ravager, might try to hunt one down next.