u/NerfRepellingBoobs

So I (F28) recently moved in with my Partner (M44), we rent a house together that nether of us lived in before.

I’m 6 months pregnant and recently my partners family have become more involved in our lives, this is really nice as they are very supportive and lovely people.

My only issue is that they often invite themselves over, usually without much warning, and my boyfriend never really asks me if it’s okay first. I would never say “no they can’t come” but sometimes they come at inconvenience times and would prefer to have some kind of say in when they come. It’s particularly frustrating as I’m the planner in my boyfriend and I’s relationship; like I’m responsible for planning and cooking meals, daily activities etc.
anyway….
The issue happened this past weekend, on the Friday I had organised for my partner and I to go to a concert out of town. I bought the tickets, payed for parking and for gas and organised the whole thing. Only thing I didn’t do was drive (I don’t fit behind the wheel lol). The whole thing went well. But we didn’t get home until 3 in the morning on the Saturday.

On the Saturday I had planned a lazy day but I would cook a nice meal in the evening.
Come 6pm my boyfriend gets a text from his sister saying she wants to pop round. I asked if he could ask them to come tomorrow as I wanted to start dinner soon and was very tired. He agreed and sent a text message back. I saw this as a good opportunity to talk to him about me not being so happy about his family dropping round so often at short notice, and that sometimes it feels like they treat our house as his house. He agreed and all was fine.
Come 7:30pm, I’m starting dinner and my boyfriend gets another text from his sister saying she’s coming at 8 ish and bringing her dog… as it happens he forgot to send the text asking to come tomorrow. (I genuinely think this was an accident on his part because he seemed annoyed at himself). At this point I’m tired, hungry and pretty annoyed because I don’t really like dogs and I don’t understand why the dog needs to come.

I say to my partner it’s fine, just make sure they don’t stay too long because it’s late and I’m hungry etc, but I made it very clear that the dog must not come in the house. They were going to sit in the garden anyway as it was a nice day, so the dog didn’t need to come in the house.

The thing is I really don’t like dogs they kinda scare me and also I have four indoor only cats, who have never seen a dog before.

By this point I was starting to get cranky so When they came I excused myself for a “nap”, tbh I really did need a lay down my back was killing me and I knew a load of people and a dog would be overwhelming.

When I’m upstairs I hear that my boyfriend has invited his family and dog in the house! Didn’t once ask for the dog to walk around. This made me so mad because I could hear the cats growling and running up the stairs.

Anyway after this I must admit I started a bit of an argument with my partner. I really didn’t think I was asking for much.
I know I was overeating a little, im definitely a little cranky at the moment as Im tired all the time and everything in my body aches! And it’s not my partners fault his family came at an inconvenient time (not their fault either) but I asked for one thing… no dog in the house.

So this happened an hour ago and I need real outside opinions. My boyfriend (25m) and I (25f) have been in a relationship for almost 3 years. We were talking in bed about how he's ready for the next chapter in his life and how I feel like I need a couple more years to grow up before I'm ready to have kids. I brought up how having kids is exciting to me, but the act of giving birth is terrifying. I said that, in my mind, it's like I'm looking forward to a major surgery that is going to make my life better, but the surgery itself is terrifying. My body and my life are going to change forever. He kept saying "but it's going to be worth it." I know it is.

Now here's where things went wrong. He then said "it's the greatest thing you'll ever do." Which, in a sense, I agree. I don't necessarily foresee myself doing anything "greater." And maybe I take feminism too far in this relationship, but I was offended. I just told him "I don't need a man telling me what the greatest thing I'll ever do is." There are women who have lived on this earth who have done amazing, incredible things. What if I started a charity that saved hundreds of lives? You never know. Could that, by some people's standards, be considered "greater" than childbirth?

He then left the room. I gave him 10-15 minutes, and then I came to see him in the office where he was playing video games. I didn't mean to offend him withwhat I said, so when I saw him, I said "I love you." That's usually how we say we're sorry. Sometimes when we're still upset, we say "no you don't" as a response, but usually in a slightly joking tone. This time he did not appear to be joking when he said "no you fucking don't." Here's how the rest of this went (approximately):

Me: "Yes I do!" Still hoping he was joking

Him: "What a gross thing to say to someone."

Me: "What? Did you misunderstand something I said?"

Him: "You're just so sexist and you don't even see it. Have I ever told you this? Like why are you even with a man?"

Me: "I'M sexist? Did you hear what you said to me? It's like me telling you, after you've met some great milestone with your career, that it's the greatest thing you'll ever do. Who am I to tell you what the greatest thing you'll ever do is? I just found it offensive."

Him: (this part's fuzzy) "I don't think anything I'll do with my career can compare to having kids. If you found that offensive, i don't know how this is going to work. You know, I just don't even want to talk to you right now, so can you just get out?"

Unfortunately, I've never seen him so serious. This might be the closest I've ever seen him to breaking up with me. I'm still shaking from this, and I'm really questioning if I'm in the wrong now. He's usually pretty good at knowing when he is in the wrong and apologizing. It's still early, so he might still apologize, but he seemed so serious this time. Is he just upset that I called him out, or am i in the wrong?

TLDR: my boyfriend told me giving birth is the greatest thing I'll ever do. I said I dont need a man telling me what the greatest thing I'll ever do it. He called me sexist and said if I'm offended he doesn't know how this relationship is going to work. Am I in the wrong here?

Real quick: I consider “raising my voice” as yelling. I was not screaming.

Background: Me (21M) was in New York to visit my grandmother a few weeks ago. Me, my sister (27F) and my parents (52F and 51M) all met at the airport. We do not live together.

I am adopted and since I was a teenager have been distant from my parents. I never hated them, and get along with them well most of the time, though from 17-18 we acted more like roommates than family.

Story: This happened a few weeks ago, but it has been sitting with me badly. Burner account.

It was extremely hot in the city, and we were going to an orchestra concert. As such, I was wearing long sleeves and slacks. Maybe that was my bad, for 95+ degree weather and humidity.

The subway stations aren’t air conditioned. While waiting for the train, I suddenly felt very lightheaded and like I was going to puke. I told my sister, and she just reassured me that I’ll cool down on the train. But as it pulled up, my vision went blurry and my hearing felt like I was underwater.

(I researched it later, and it was a heatstroke. I’m fine.)

The thing is, when I told my ma “I can’t f()ing see” she got upset and went to stand by my father and sis. Two strangers got on and helped me, assuming I was drunk (I had half a drink at that point, so I knew it wasn’t that).

I stayed civil for the rest of the night, but back at the hotel I started going off at my parents for not helping me. I told them that if those strangers didn’t get on, I probably would have passed out (they gave me water and stuff). My mother started crying and said that she didn’t think it was that big of a deal, and assumed I was overreacting to the heat “like I always used to”. (As I kid I never liked being hot).

I never like seeing her cry, and even now it’s making me feel guilty. At the same time, I was genuinely scared in that situation and thought it’d be them helping me, not two randos (all the love to them) holding my hand and helping me 2 feet away from family.

Am I the ahole for yelling at them afterwards, or was it warranted? Should I apologize?

EDIT: No, I did not have a heat stroke according to comments, but all symptoms above stay true. Apparently it’s heat exhaustion. I thought it was heat stroke because I forgot heat exhaustion existed. In any case, this is not the point of my post. Thank you for informing me.

My former manager was tough to work with, but he would never know I didn't like working with him because I acted professionally and just adhered to his ridiculous rules. Also I am easy to get along with and find humor in everything, as well a job is a job, you just do it an move on and try to get along with everyone and joke with people, I guess he though we were buds and asked me if it's OK he put me down as a reference.

I was honest in my reference when the hiring person called, they asked questions like what was his management style, can you give an example of how they resolved conflict within a team, what is your feedback, etc. So I said how it was, his management style was a tad authoritarian, he liked to find mistakes and only point out those rather than bring light to things you do right. He more often inspired conflict, primarily with when ruling out old ineffective ways of doing business, he likes old way of doing things rather than time saving ways. And my feedback overall wasn't that good, I said I looked when I left the company for easier manager to work with because he was among other reasons why i left that company.

He called me after to check if I spoke to them, I said I did, I gave a reference, he was asking what I said I said and I gave a generic response, I said I touched on our experience working together and the impact you made at the company. Then I made a 'joke' about telling them about the time he royally screwed up, I said obvioisly I mentioned how you told this account to f off, and take their business up their ass. I didn't say that to the hiring manager, but it did actually happen but he obviously thought I was joking and he still thinks we're buds.

He asked if my company I am at is hiring, still I feel bad. Am i TA

Okay context: I developed a sunflower allergy as an adult. One day, I ate some sunflower seeds a friend gave me at work. The next thing I remember is waking up in a hospital. Apparently I had an anaphylactic reaction; my lips/tongue swelled, my throat closed, and I passed out. I had to be given 2 EpiPens, one by the EMTs and another at the hospital. When I awoke, they told me it was probably the sunflower seeds because it's a common allergen, but there's no way to know 100%. They referred me to a allergist. I had some testing done, both blood/skin, and I reacted to sunflowers both times. I didn't think too much of it because sunflowers are easy to avoid. So last week my SIL invited me to a sunflower festival. I told her no and said, you know I am allergic to sunflowers. She said, Yeah, but you aren't eating them. I responded with, Yes, but I don't know if being around thousands of sunflowers could trigger a reaction, and it is not a risk I am willing to take. She pushed back a little more, saying I was being paranoid. I said I am sorry; I have no desire to stop breathing again just to attend a festival. She got upset and told my husband's brother (her husband) that I was being ridiculous and that I accused her of trying to endanger me. My husband said it is perfectly reasonable that I don't want to expose myself to what I am allergic to. Well, she texted the family group chat that her birthday was ruined because we could no longer go to the sunflower festival for it. I didn't even respond. I didn't tell her she couldn't go, and we could go out to eat or something different if she still wanted to hang out with me. I am very confused about what I did wrong here. I didn't even know it was for her birthday.

My son has been dating his current girlfriend for the last six years. It is painfully obvious to me that she likes him much more than he likes her. I do not condone his behavior. I offered him one of my family's rings to propose with but he refused, saying I should give it to his brother instead.

My DIL is obsessed with the idea of their wedding's first look. I took significant time off work to go dress shopping with her family last week. She insisted I join her so that I can provide insight into what my son will like to see her in.

Her dress choices were very revealing, I do not say this judgmentally- I love a little cleavage, but they were very low cut tops with half her chest out, or white lace over a flesh-colored bodice, and deep plunge necklines, you know the like. I stayed neutral and gave my (very positive) opinion instead of what I think my son would like. EDIT- For the record when I was her age I wore much more revealing clothes. I do not have a problem with her showing skin.

Last weekend, the bride asked me pointedly which of her three choices he would be stunned to see her in. I felt guilty for misleading her and told her maybe she could go off of the dresses he bought for her over the years, that his choice would be similar to that. He picked some outfits for her which are truly hideous in my opinion. Long sleeves, granny prints, below the knee type dresses. Most of them are maxi dresses, a few sleeveless but nothing with a deep neckline.

Well the bride got my meaning and it was very awkward and uncomfortable. Her MOH was also a little shocked, but I don't think the others in the party got my message. She asked me again in private if he would like any of her dresses, I said she knows him best. Then she pressed and I told her he might not, but she should wear what makes her feel confident anyway. Well, she is taking all her anger towards him out on me and has not contacted me all week even though she had a shopping appointment on Thursday and posted a story saying she said yes to her dress (a reference to the show)

In late 2016, I switched from birth control pills to a copper IUD. I wanted to be off the hormones, and after a certain election, I wanted a long-term, reliable, hassle-free contraceptive.

And thus began my downfall. I gained over 100lbs in those years, despite diet and exercise. I work an active job, but have chronic pain, which got progressively worse. Those hormones I didn’t want? Guess they’d been keeping my body in check.

Started trying to conceive 3 years ago, age 36, and 7 months later, I was on cycle day 45 with no premenstrual symptoms, nor a positive pregnancy test in sight.

I had recently moved, so I went to a new OBGYN who immediately tested me for PMOS. Confirmed. I finally got my cycle on day 80. Started metformin. Had success with pain reduction, some weight loss, and getting back to work, but my appetite was still massive. Nothing satisfied me.

I had my annual physical in March, and when my bloodwork came back, my A1C was back up to 5.7. I was feeling sluggish and experiencing pain again, so I asked my PCP, who agreed to start me on Wegovy tablets. My husband and I agreed to put a hold on conception until I reach my goal weight.

In the first three months, I confirmed ovulation twice, and decided that since most of my weight gain was after discontinuing birth control, it was time to start back.

I’ve been at 9mg Wegovy for almost a month now, and I started taking BCP (loryna) a week ago. I’ve lost 6lbs since increasing to 9mg, but 4 of those pounds have been since adding BC!

Oddly, I feel more bloated, but I think I’m just getting some nausea from starting back on the pill. Other than that and some recent insomnia, I’m feeling really good. My cravings are for more fruit and vegetables, lean protein, and healthy fats.

Anyone else going back on birth control since starting GLP-1 have a similar effect?

So much context is needed for this question. Me (32F) and my husband (32M) have been together for almost 7 years. Never have we ever had relationship problems. We’ve never broken up. Honestly the best relationship I’ve ever had. We have an 18 month old son together. And being a first time mom is so much harder than I could have ever imagined. I’ve been struggling! I’m sleep deprived, I’m overwhelmed, I’m so short tempered, I’m in a very stressful chapter of life! All this said, I understand it’s not an excuse to let my “wifely duties” slide but I did let them slide and my husband and I hadn’t had a date night for 5 months. We were having s\\\*x about once every 2-3 weeks. And he says he didn’t feel like I loved him anymore.

Queue this new girl getting hired at his work. She apparently starts throwing herself at my husband. Knowing he’s married. They start texting outside of work. Start flirting. And apparently start “catching feelings” for each other. My husband says she was giving him all the love and attention he needed from me. One morning while my husband is at work, he texts me “I have feelings for my coworker and she has feelings for me. I’m sorry. But I’m leaving you for her”. I was DEVASTATED would be an understatement. However, later that same day, my husband came to his senses and realized he didn’t want to leave me after all. It took a couple days of me crying, us going to couples therapy, and him sleeping in our garage, for us to reconcile but we decided to give our marriage another try. I make a serious effort to show him love. We have s\\\*x like 3 times that one week we got back together. We had gotten past this horrible hiccup in our marriage. I thought.

Plot twist. He leaves me for a second time for her!!!! The same girl!! He wakes up one morning, a week into our new attempt at our marriage, and tells me “staying in this marriage is not fair to you, I still have feelings for her and I can’t keep doing this”. I can not even put into words how much this hurt. I went into a really deep dark place mentally and I’ve never felt that kind of pain before. This time it takes him 6 days to ask to get back together. I’m embarrassed to say, I was begging him to come back the whole time so I did indeed take him back. Again. A second time. This time with the promise that he will never see her again because he transferred work locations and we can finally move on with her not in our lives.

Here’s the final conclusion guys. We have been “back together” for another 7 days, a week into this SECOND attempt, he is now asking me if he can text this girl as a friend. He swears I can read the texts, he won’t flirt, he’ll tell her that his wife is allowing them to be friends and nothing more. He claims that he needs to keep her as a friend, he’s sad that he’s lost their friendship (they’ve known each other 3 months btw), and he can’t move on with me until I allow him to be friends with her. He is telling me that he will leave me to go be friends with her if I don’t allow them to text each other.

I need help. I’ve never been this girl who allows men to step all over her. I’ve always been the strong independent woman who loved to say she didn’t need a man. Now this man is my husband, father of my son, the man I do still love. But I’m scared he’s gonna leave me for her. Duh. What is marriage without trust? Do I trust him to be friends with her?

AITAH for staying with him? AITAH for not letting him be friends with a girl?

I have explained a million times, I have shown court documents. I have had the frank hard conversations with her. it doesnt change her opinion. I can’t get her in any kind of therapy she refuses

I feel like a peice of shit so I am coming her.

I got custody of my niece when she was three. She was taken away by the state and the parent ( my sister)  was deemed unfit to take care of her. She lived in a drug house and overall  sucked. I won’t go I got details but she was not a fit parent.

We told my kid stories of her mother before she went off the deep end and I thought we made it pretty clear why she couldn’t see her. When my daughter was 14, my sister was getting back into contact with the family and seemed to be clean. I met up with her and didn’t like what I saw. She took no responsibility and I decided to keep my daughter away. 

This resulted in her contacting her behind my back and trying to pick her up from school once. The cops were called. She wanted to met her mom but I didn’t think it was a good idea and was proven correct 6 months later when she stole from our mother. She went back to drugs but sometimes would randomly text my kid. 

My kid was in therapy  when this was happening. When my kid was 17 my sister passed away ( overdose) and I singed her up for grief counseling. The first time my kid saw her was at the viewing ( she wanted to go). 

The issue now is my kid is 20 and in college. She is upset that she never knew her bio mom. It has been an argument and I wanted her to go back to therapy. 

We got into an argument yesterday over it. I asked her what she wanted to eat and she told me to eat with her bio mom but she can’t have that becuase I didn’t allow them to met. I snapped ( I have been dealing with this for years at this point) and told her that her bio mom didn’t love there more than drug and that is why she never met her. It’s not my fault she loved drugs more than her and I am done being blamed for it.

She was pissed and crying since. My husband things it needed to be said and he has been going on too long. I feel like shit though

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/constellationRegulus

AITA For Not Going to my Sister's Wedding? + 4 year update

Originally posted to r/AmItheAsshole & u/AITAH_unfiltered

Thanks to u/BakingGiraffeBakes for suggesting this BoRU

TRIGGER WARNING: >!Ableism, LGBT-phobia, verbal abuse!<

Original Post  July 1, 2022

My sister is getting married, and has banned my Service Dog from her wedding and reception.

I have a fairly severe anxiety disorder. To combat this, I got a Service Dog. My Dog has made major positive change in my life. I can go places again! Another thing to keep in mind: My dog is probably an Australian Shepherd, Boarder Collie mix. She is also the most chill, laid back, and affectionate dog I have ever head the pleasure of working with. Her entire personality is sleep, and 'can I has pets??' She's insanely well behaved, especially when we go places. I get lots of compliments about this, including from the Mental Health professionals that work with me.

My sister's reasoning for banning my service dog, and I quote: "I don't want dog hair on the most expensive dress I will ever wear." My sister is also worried about my Dog's behavior. Like barking, or getting into food. My Dog really doesn't do either of these things. Well, she barks if my sisters kids come over because she LOVES my sisters kids and is excited about them!! (She also used to lick my sisters kids faces cuz they are very small, but my sister didn't like this, so I made my Dog stop.) But my Dog is trained NOT to bark when she is wearing her vest. She has never done so while working. She responds well to the word no, and the 'leave it' command. Again, super well mannered dog. She legit just lays down when we go to the movies or a doctors appointment and chills out or falls asleep. My sister believes none of this, and has barely seen my service dog in action.

After my sister decided this, both I and my parents have tried to compromise. My dog does shed, but there are ways to combat this. Like a groomer, anti-shed shampoo, a good brush out the day of, and staying away from my sister on that day. My sister is unyielding.

Now the wedding is small and at a Church I dislike (cuz when I went to talk to a pastor about this situation, he basically told me to outgrow having an anxiety disorder.) So that's stressful. And of course there are people I don't know there. The reception would be even worse for me, because it will be loud, full of people, most of whom I wont know, and full of people who stress me out (most of my extended family and I are iffy on the getting along front. Probably has something to do with being the Liberal Ace NB Cousin? not the point.) Will also say, my anxiety and depression have been super high for the last year or so.

So, as much as it pains, I cannot go to my sisters wedding. My mental health is not stable enough. I need my Service Dog's assistance in all public spaces in order to live as best life as I can. I am going with some church friends (good humans, I promise) to a planetarium instead. She has been informed of this.  Not going is probably gonna hurt her feelings, and strain our already strained relationship.

So, AITA

EDIT: My dog is trained to do pressure therapy. She uses her weight to ground me to prevent or shorten anxiety attacks. This is done by leaning. laying, or sitting on me.  Sorry, should've mentioned!

VERDICT: NOT THE ASSHOLE

Update  July 20, 2026

Reddit Suggested I post here so I thought I'd give it a shot.

^OG AITA post: Four years ago, my sister banned my service dog from her wedding.

Let's get a few things out of the way. Tarot is an Australian Shepherd/Border Collie mix, black and brown brindle, and the calmest, most friendly dog I have ever met. Tarot is trained to do sensory grounding. My disabilities are mental health related. I'm in therapy. I finally found a medication combo that works. I'm in a safe environment where I can heal. I am no contact with both my sister and my brother.

Starting with my brother, because it's a shorter story. Brother is controlling and verbally abusive. When I went to college I learned two things: I have disabilities, and how to say 'no.' My brother does not like the latter, and blames the former. I told him flat out that if he wants a relationship with me, he needs to get therapy. Then when he tried to text me after that, I'd send a therapy related gif. Last time we had an actual conversation, he said 'I preferred you before you thought you were broken.' I blocked him. Not for the first time, but this time it's permanent.

Now, to my sister. Oh dear ghosts, my sister. There is, of course, the reason for my OG AITA post. My sister banned my service dog from her wedding. Why? Quote: 'I don't want dog hair on the most expensive dress I'll ever wear.' Her and her husband have never liked Tarot. They are also convinced my disabilities are fake. That pattern has continued. Before this even happened, I wasn't allowed to visit my sister in the hospital after her C section with my nephew. She claimed it was because service dogs can't go in the maternity ward. This is false.

Before that, BEFORE Tarot, was the Phantom of the Opera incident. My sister and I were both music nerds. We've actually played in a local orchestra together. I'm obsessed with Phantom of the Opera. POTO was coming to my state one year, and I asked if she wanted to go. She did. She got tickets, I was gonna pay her back. Couple months before the show, I noticed a charge I didn't make on my bank card. I did not react well. I was afraid of either fraud or my dad doing something (he's done things without telling me before.) I was having a panic attack, and was very bad at managing my behavior during those back then (therapy has helped.) I called, frantic and pissed. Turns out my sister and her now husband had bought a movie on Amazon using my card by accident. Her husband got pissed that I was freaking out over a relatively low charge. I'm not sure if I apologized. She called me back a few minutes later and told me she wasn't going to go to Phantom cuz it was 'obviously too expensive for me.' That hurt. After crying my eyes out and talking to a friend, I called her back, and said 'we can go, you can take a friend to the show, or I can buy the tickets from you.' She chose the last one. I went with my best friend.

Sister's husband continues to be a bastard. My parents and I are both seeing emotionally abusive behavior. (Problems have happened between him and my parents, but those aren't my stories to tell. However, their treatment of my parents is one of the reasons I stopped wanting to talk to her.)

Then there's the Great Christmas Fiasco. My parents used to make prime beef for family Christmas. In an attempt to include my sister's husband, dad offered to let the husband cook the prime beef. He did. Everyone went over to my parents house. We did gifts in the morning. My niece got a lil robot dog with fake treats. At the time, my parent's had a 15 year old shichon, Oreo. (He passed last year. Rest in peace, love.) 2 things about Oreo: he had significant vision loss at this time, and he was obsessed with food. So I asked my sister's husband if we could put the fake treats up so Oreo (NOT TAROT) wouldn't eat them. Cuz Oreo would. Sister's husband flipped out about my dog. I was overstimulated so I didn't hear much of it. Then I took a nap (which was planned and approved before I went over.) When I woke up for lunch, Sister's family was gone. My sister's husband told me through my sister that it was because of Tarot. He told my mom it was because he didn't like that she took pictures of him. (He apparently doesn't like being in photographs. I have no idea why. My parents don't use social media so it's not because he's worried about that.)

After that, I tried to keep in contact with my sister. I'd call. She never answered. I'd text, no reply. I would literally ask if she was alive. Nope, nothing. She'd break plans with my parents if she found out I was going to be there. Last time I saw her was two Halloweens ago. Before then, my older nephew got a golden retriever puppy. Which is hilarious. She's gonna have dog hair in her house for at least 2 more years. My much younger niece and nephew love my older nephew's dog. They also love Tarot, despite the few times they met. My niece has told Tarot to sit. My small nephew has literally sat on Tarot, and would pet her once, very gently, and laugh. When they came over that Halloween, my sister wouldn't let her kids, esp my niece, near my dog. My niece was wearing a white Elsa dress.

The final nail in the coffin: I was in the hospital with pneumonia. My mom or dad stayed with me in the hospital to help with Tarot; I couldn't take her outside, as I could barely breathe and was attached to oxygen and an IV (I named it STIV.) My sister needed something from my parent's house and called my mom. I talked to her for about five seconds when my mom said I was in the hospital. Well, apparently the reason she needed something from my mom's house is because her husband decided to move. My sister didn't bother to tell me. It made me realize just how unwelcome I was in her life, and how I wasn't willing to be hurt by her anymore. I blocked her.

It's not something I did on a whim. I had been talking about it with my therapist for awhile. We talked about if this was a relationship worth putting energy into. It finally hit the point where it wasn't.

That's where things stand. My mom is being supportive, as best as she can be, about my disabilities. Dad basically ignores they exist. Pretty much everyone else we encounter, from extended family to friends to strangers are perfectly fine with Tarot and I. So we've sticking with the people who accept us. Thanks for reading

Dog tax on my profile if this post decides to Hate Me. This post decided to hate me

OOP's dog tax

OOP ADDED IN THE COMMENTS

> Reread my post and I think I forgot to mention that my sister doesn't think Anxiety and Depression are real. That I can choose to just stop being depressed or having anxiety. If I had an off switch I would never turn it back on. She thinks I'm faking needing Tarot.  > > For the record: faking needing a service dog makes no sense to me. Training takes a lot of work. Having a dog in public access is challenging. The world isn't built for disabled people. For instance, I like to swim. I have to go to an indoor pool because I don't want my dog in the 100°+ F weather for a long period of time. Which is more expensive. My parents are being very nice and helping pay for a membership at a place with an indoor pool (they and I agree that I need to work on being a bit healthier.) I carry a 15ib portable kennel to the pool and a blanket for my dog. It's huge and cumbersome. I use it so people will leave her alone. I could put Tarot on the blanket and she'd happily watch everyone from there, but people wouldn't leave her alone. Experience spoken from.  > > Then there's the Big Issue: finding a job that's compatible with a service dog. There's lots of job openings, but most of them are medical, food service, or manufacturing. The Health Department has a problem with the first two, and the second is dangerous for my dog. Been out of work since December of 2024 (it's July of 2026. I'm hoping to find a job soon.) > > Had a long conversation with my older nephew about how I can't just leave Tarot home to go to work. I'm not sure if he understands. But I hope he does. We're talking a little bit.

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP

DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

My ex and I attend the same college, and both live near the school. We are from the same town. Earlier this week, my ex's stepfather died. He is one of my dad's best friends and my godfather, but we are not close. But my dad asked me to attend the funeral, so I am. I have my ex blocked everywhere. My ex called her mom and told her mom that she did not have a way home for the funeral.

(For context, my ex was recently diagnosed with epilepsy and now cannot drive. As far as a plane, it is a bit of a logistical nightmare involving multiple regional airports that our house away from each town.)

My ex's mom called my mom and asked if I was coming to the funeral and if I could give my ex a ride. My mom told my ex's mom that I could give a ride. My mom then called and asked me to give my ex a ride home to the funeral and back. I told her I absolutely would be doing no such thing. She then said that she was no longer asking and she was telling me I would be giving her a ride. I laughed and said, "No." She then said I could not stay at her house if I would not give a ride. I told her I would just stay with my dad or get a hotel room, but I am not giving my ex a ride under any circumstances. That was on Wednesday. My mom has been keeping trying to get me to give her a ride. I refuse. I am leaving in the morning to drive back to town for the funeral. The funeral is on Monday afternoon.

AIW?

Ok so i got absolutely flamed in the AITA thread before the mods removed it cause I guess its the wrong sub so I thought I would try here. A lot of people were assuming some crazy stuff so I figure I'll post what I said verbatim and then add some clarification at the end

"Sorry for the vague title but it is a weird story to sum up

So my wife gave birth about 4 weeks ago everything went well and we welcomed out daughter into the world and its been amazing. She did really well and we had great team work through the whole thing and both have talked about how closer we feel.

Now, you cant have sex for estimated 6 weeks after she gives birth and I am/ have been totally fine with that. Making sure she heals and is comfortable is obviously the main focus and i have 0 issues there.

Now obviously with no sex ive been getting randomly hard a lot more frequently and seeing as sleep and schedules are not our ally right now im in my boxers most of the time so she notices.

My wife started being like " im sorry honey I wish we could do something" or" I really miss us being close" and I totally agree but again understand that we cant.

My issue is she keeps laying it on REAL thick that she's sooo sorry and she wishes she could help and sometimes is almost flirty with it? To the point I kinda tested the waters with some " jokes " like " well ya got 2 hands and a mouth" and she just kinda chuckles but then will go back to being so sorry there's nothing she can do"

Which im not asking for anything and im fine with nothing cause that what this phase of life demands

But fuck, working on very little sleep and constantly having this interaction is driving me mental.

WIBTAH if I gently told my wife that constantly hearing " i wish I could help" when like she could if she really wanted is just making things worse for me ? Is there a tactful way bring this up? Or should I just accept that she has the lions share of the bad right now and just keep this to my self"

Now some things to clear up.

My wife and I love each other and are attracted to each other and are very nice to each other. I dont hate my wife

Im not parading my dick around she just notices it and she will bring the topic up. I haven't brought the topic of sex up once since she gave birth

Im TOTALLY fine not having sex or doing anything physical until she is healthy and actually excited to do things again

My main priority is my wife and our baby. Im just also very tired and running on fumes.

The " joke" was only after quite a few times of me saying " babe its fine dont even worry about that stuff right now"

Also it was a joke she laughed and we moved on.

I am aware of how birth works and that she is recovering and she is fucking awesome for going through that. this in no way undermines that fact

Now, my pain isn’t as bad as a lot of you here, but even the best of us have our bad days. I’m also a licensed massage therapist, and I specialized in chronic pain conditions long before my diagnosis.

Still, those days come when I can’t stand the lightest touch (but an elbow digging into my shoulder is fine). In a field of pretty touchy people. I started describing these as my “museum exhibit” days, where I felt like I needed a sign in front of me saying “Please do not touch.”

So I got myself a custom pin with that on it, and it’s been successful so far! (Photo in the comments.) No unexpected pats on the shoulder or scalp rubs on the bad days!

My girlfriend was in a relationship with her ex from March 2024 till September 2025, about a year of which they lived together. They broke up because he cheated on her.

I started dating her from late October 2025. In early January 2026, I asked her why she never posted about me since she constantly posted about everything in her life, she told me she keeps her relationships private. And that even with her ex she had only posted one story ever which she 'removed' after the Break up.

At that point, I had no issues with her past relationship or that she posted about them. I had asked her in December if she was sure she had moved on and that we can take it slow but she assured me that she didn't care about him.

But in late January, I found her stalking her ex on Instagram, linkedin, reddit etc. She later apologised but her previous relationship has been a sensitive topic since then. I asked her to block him and delete everything about him as a condition for us moving forward. She agreed.

It's been nine months and she has only posted a 'close friend' story about me on valentine's day. At first I thought it was lovely, even though it was only a close friend story, since I had not even asked her to do it.

Recently her friend mentioned something which hinted that my gf may have had posted about her ex more that she had let on. I stalked her phone (I know it's not right, I'm not going to defend myself her but I needed to know the truth).

I found out:

1. She had constantly posted about her ex from 3rd month of their relationship till the end. Dozens of completely public posts and stories, including them kissing and her jokingly calling him her husband (though they were unmarried)

2. She had archived all those posts, instead of deleting them, as I had asked her to do (his images and everything else related).

3. Her closed friend list turned out to be just me. So none of her friends actually saw the story (and she has not posted a close friend story since then so I know the close friend list is unchanged).

My issues:

1. Why never post about me ever in 9 months vs dozens of romantic posts about him? She never even posted my image in a group setting either.

2. Why lie it was only one story about her ex when there were so many?

3. Why bother with the fake close friend story at all? I had not even asked her to post it. Like why lie. Just say this time she wants to wait till engagement or marriage to post about the relationship. At this point, the trust is harmed.

Please advice me on what to do?

Tldr: girlfriend constantly posted romantic stuff about her ex on Instagram (had said she never did) but never even posted my face in almost a year, even in a group setting.

EDIT: I know it’s not about the money for him. Seeing the account made me realize that no amount will change that. I am wondering if I am making the right call since this really is how my grandpa wants to live his life.

I (25) live with my grandpa (92). I make good money, but moved in with him because he could use the company and I’m tired of hiding my 3 cats from landlords.

I do not pay rent. I’ve offered many times to pay rent or utilities, but he wasn’t having it. Eventually, I had to insist on paying for groceries just so I could contribute something.

The main point of contention is the fridge. Our family drops off meals for us occasionally so it’s hard to judge how much food I need to buy for the week. Sometimes things expire or go bad and I secretly get rid of them because otherwise he will just scrape off the mold and eat it anyway. My grandpa hates when we throw out food, even if it’s bad.

I say “secretly” because he goes through the trash. My grandpa wouldn’t eat it once it’s thrown out, but he would see that you threw it out and get mad. I’ve been tucking spoiled things in my downstairs trash toward the center, taking that bag and putting it in with the cat litter, then throwing the whole thing out.

My parents are split on the matter. My mom would (prior to me moving in) take the spoiled food to her house and throw it out there. My dad is of the opinion that my grandpa made it this far (92), and we need to just let him live his life, and if cutting mold off food is how he wants to live then he should be allowed to do that. I previously agreed with my mom, but now I am not so sure.

Our family all has the same financial advisory company. Today, I noticed an account statement addressed to my grandpa from them and I peaked. Yes I shouldn’t have looked.

There is SO much money in his account. It’s set to double this year from 5 years ago. There will be over $1 million by 2030. I’m so mad.

Who cares if we throw out $20 of produce each month! Yesterday, I expended more effort disposing of a moldy bell pepper so my grandpa wouldn’t eat it than I did hiding weed from my own mother.

There is no excuse for him to resort to eating spoiled food. He doesn’t have dementia, we don’t live in famine times, we don’t live in destitution, we don’t have to save the box of hamburger helper that expired in 2014.

I DO NOT CARE that he won’t spend his money. I care that he won’t let me spend my money or anyone’s money on him. He is well off, my parents are well off, I am well off. He doesn’t have to live like this!

Now I am having doubts about if I’ve been doing the right thing. It upsets my grandpa when I throw out food but now I’m realizing he really does want to live this way. He could have $25 million and he would still scrape mold off an avocado and eat it anyway.

Is my dad right? AITA for going behind his back and throwing out spoiled food?

This was on the 4th of July.

So I was having a really good Fourth of July when a women and her son who was maybe 4/5 years old got in my car. It was a normal ride but then suddenly I smelt something really out of the ordinary. It had turned out that her son pooped in his pullup. I didn’t really realize what happened at first but then I heard her say something about it. She didn’t really apologize but more so laughed it off and acted like it was funny. She asked if I could pull over which annoyed me more because now I’m just losing out on potential money. She said she has to deal with it and I said “this better be quick” which really upset her. She was saying he didn’t mean to do this and everything and I pointed out that it’s clear he shouldn’t have even earned pull-ups if this is what he was doing in them and that he should still be in diapers. I also want to say the kid wasn’t autistic or had anything wrong with him and got upset when I mentioned he should be back in diapers.
That entire thing took 5 minutes or so and then when I dropped her off and drove away I looked back and she LEFT THE PULLUP IN MY CAR. Just a bright blue loaded bomb sitting in my back seat. I was beyond furious and called uber and submitted every report I could.
The entire thing took 30 minutes or so and looking back I probably missed out on some good money because of my reaction. It just crossed the line numerous times in my book and he should have never done that and she should have been really apologetic and waited to change the brat. I understand I could have handled it better but was I the asshole here?

My husband and I have 3 kids (9m, 5f, and 3f). My kids go to a home daycare after school and in the summers. It’s run by a woman, Judy, with her daughter as an assistant. Every kid in the daycare is related to Judy, except for my kids.

Judy was a preschool and public school teacher for 20 years before opening her daycare. She’s a great teacher but she is very strict.

The kids aren’t allowed to bring any toys from home or anything with a screen (including a smartwatch). Judy doesn’t allow screen time during the school year and over the summer she only allows a half hour to an hour of PBS kids for the kids over 5 after they do roughly an hour of “summer school” while the kids 5 and under nap.

Judy also doesn’t make alternate meals without a doctors note. She tells the kids she did her job by making the food, whether they choose to eat it or not is on them.

Additionally, the kids over 5 are responsible for packing their bags when they go out (they do at least 3 outings a week). The first few times they get a list, after that it’s on them to remember their snacks, water bottles, books, toys, etc. If they forget, she keeps a small water bottle and granola bar in her bag but it’s not as good as what they would get if they remembered to pack.

My son hates Judy’s daycare. He doesn’t want to carry a backpack so he ends up drinking lukewarm water and eating a granola bar or skipping snack, he hates her lunches, he’s upset about the no screen rule and having to leave his watch at home, and he especially hates summer school.

He’s been begging me to put him in camp. I’ve been refusing because:

a) camp is $450 a week for him to be in a group of 25 kids watched by some teenagers at our local rec center. Judy charges $375 and has 8 kids to 2 adults.

b) camp is from 9-4. Judy’s is from 7-7 (our kids are typically there from 8:30-6:30)

c) the kids are learning responsibility at Judy’s and the summer work helps prevent the summer slump.

My son has been throwing massive tantrums when it’s time to leave in the mornings and my husband is wanting to give in and put him in camp to make things easier. I’m refusing to pull him from Judy’s so he’s upset at me for being difficult.