I think my behaviour inhibitory system (BIS) as explained by Elaine is hindering my life.
I don’t have much activities and I’m alone. All this general banter that doesn’t last deeply is not satisfying …
Of course previous trauma doesn’t help
I just feel so nothing or just sadness/depression
I preferably don’t gravitate to follow the nose sensations
Will it affect latter stages ?
Fellow meditators
Would like to hear your opinion
5 months in
Idk I feel alert but unmotivated to do stuff
Like I’m always fearing something , not big anxiety but just inkling feeling
I’m on 60 mg so idk if that’s a lot actually or I should ask doc to switch or lower it
I don’t have opportunity to talk to her much
But she seemed nice and kind. So no wonder in particular two weeks ago she was more talkative than usual
She knew her time was up
I do feel sad I probably won’t see her again and can empathise how she must be feeling
On another note Idk 🤷 how long I can witness the brutality of corporate life
This is really tough
Noting all sensations when in and out breathe, connecting (comparing length of in and out breathes eg ) , labelling
Sometimes on a bad day these instructions get pretty stressful to me
Any thoughts how you go about it ?
I need connection , to socialise
I posted earlier but ….
What if things don’t go well
What if she sees my weakness
What if it goes awkwardly
What if she dislikes certain aspects of me
How can someone not be worried if dating somebody
Ok back to square one what if rejected and it gets awkward
Male
Cause I am right now especially going to be f2f
I start to think that I can rest now…
I didn’t know better then and was in a bad spot
You don’t like all this online mumbo jumbo brainwash
You purr for intimacy
You fall in love with poetry
You crave for spontaneity and creativity
Fall in love with kindness, vulnerability, authenticity not LV bags, Mercedes Benz and Ferraris.
Deep inside we know people yearn for intimacy yet are afraid of it at the same time
Male.
Imagine you are 15 years old. You are just minding your own thing in school, you are walking your way to the classroom.
You pass by random male student Stranger A, who suddenly out of nowhere forms his fist and swings directs it at your genitals purposely, apparently not hitting but scaring you. You get startled as it came so sudden (of course it looked like your balls were about to be hit ). Your body feels scared as first reflex respond.
Few days later another Stranger B, comes around in another area of school and does similar inappropriate gestures.
I feel I cannot ignore it as you still are stuck in the same school. But the body does feel unsafe, even if it was just “fake play”. My gut feels that ignoring is not going to make my body feel safe.
What would you do if you met this scenario in school to respond ?
Have been on 60 mg for a few months , want to consider if I can reduce dosage mg as I feel I can manage myself better related to trauma.
Any experience ?
As a male.
How do you regulate ?
I just want to be nice to myself… and rest…
Your insights are much appreciated fellow meditators
Basically neuroticism is the tendency to feel negative emotions (anxiety, sadness, fear etc ) more easily.
Double whammy
Like having some not friendly arguments with people / bullies
Seeing or walking past them again feels awkward, and there is some anxiety/fear in me.
And it’s can bog down my mind.
Any advice ? I have emotional sensitivity
It feels like I’m just always hiding ….