u/Yourfathersnapkin

For some reason everyone in my life hates Sriracha besides me and it feels so isolating. I know it's not necessarily an unpopular hot sauce in the general public but I need fellow Sriracha lovers to tell me they like it so I stop feeling so alone on this.

I know this is a bit of a weird post but I have no idea why everyone I know dislikes Sriracha.

I genuinely can't handle diet soda anymore it will give me a stomach ache every time I drink it. I think it's from me messing up my stomach via the disorder but I didn't know.

I need some examples so I can better see what's the disorder and not my own thinking. I noticed there's a lot of sneaky thoughts and ways the ED will talk to you and I would love some help spotting it.

It's become so hard to restrict lately when I'm hungry I shove food in my mouth but end up spitting it out.

It's like I can't just straight up starve, so I eat but not really in the most wasteful way possible.

My extremely caring older sister has been making my food and I always get so guilty eating it and yes, I know it's extremely wasteful and disrespectful, but I keep spitting it out. Like I just can't get myself to eat more than a few bites or else I'm swimming in guilt and want to end it all. Especially because she likes to cook foods with lots of butter and stuff which is one of my biggest scares. (Cheese and milk and really any dairy products with fat.) I'm also doing this with foods she doesn't cook and it's really hard to stop.

I've literally been sitting in front of my food for who knows how long staring at it and it feels like I physically can't get myself to eat it. I know I'm probably feeling fear, but my emotions are still numb from Anorexia. Can someone please give tips? I'm really struggling.

Like play video games around her? I know this is probably a stupid question but I really don't want her to feel like I'm ignoring her or anything while I do so.

I've only had anorexia for six years. I'm wondering what health problems people who've dealt with it for a long time have.

Also anyone who has this disorder without direct health problems, you're not invalid or any less sick if you don't have health problems. Even if you just have nutritional deficiencies you're still sick.

I hate how I use it to trigger myself into starving. I always feel like Ellen is starving perfectly and I'm failing. I also hate how the movie depicts us like we don't slip up. Also that stupid boy who is the "love interest" of the film. He tries to assault Ellen.

But I also love the movie because its comforting and makes me feel less like a freak because there's people who also have eating disorders in the film, even if they're not portrayed the best.

What's everyone's thoughts on this?

Massive TW for suicidal ideation

I genuinely don't want to get better in hopes of passing away. I've gotten better before but I've also almost died before but with the state of my life and the world I feel an intense sense of hopelessness and the fact that I have almost died of anorexia before makes me want to do it again. Yes it was a horrible feeling but I can't stand being alive anymore.

Before anyone says anything about talking to a counselor I already have one, and I can't change her out for a new one despite the fact she doesn't understand my eating disorder at all and just days things like "what will you do?" "Just eat.

Also yes this post might be messy but I don't fucking care

I think it's the dream for me. There's a few theories on how the Phoenix in the dream is actually the order and honestly I have my suspicions the dream is the macula luring Hugo. I know other people have thought this but the subtle hints in the game truly make it terrifying. We never find out what the macula truly is or wants, but I think that is the most effective method of making it scary and also making the game interesting. Is the macula just a force of nature? Or is it some kind of cosmic horror that invades the earth, or is it of the earth itself as a form of rage towards humanity? We'll never know, but it seems intelligent enough.

I always find myself putting myself in Alicia's shoes and feeling the sheer terror of living through a calamity that has no true known ending.

Another thing I feel like the game is portraying is the horror of living through the bubonic plague. The people back then knew absolutely nothing about it, or how to help it in any way and most likely thought it was some kind of divine wrath from God punishing them, and I think making the macula this way is effective at portraying the genuine horror the people in that time period must have felt at the chaos surrounding them.

What's the evolutionary need for this? What environment might get a trait like this selected? I'm really curious. I'm not a biology major or anything so I can't make any accurate guesses.

I have actively started crying out of love when around Apollo and Eros. Is this weird? Is there a word for this? Sorry of this is a dumb question

"Look I eat a normal amount of food!" "See how I choose the normal option over the weird, low calorie option"

I'm sorry but the way they portray the characters or themselves eating the quote unquote normal option always feels like they feel better than, or are one upping them somehow, especially because it feels like they're portraying those people as mean or awful when in reality a lot of people doing diets like that are minding their own business.

Please tell I'm not the only one who sees this and it feels genuinely hurtful.

I think a lot of the people who believe that demons suck your energy have unintentionally attracted an astral parasite that attempted to pose as said demon and they were unable to discern the demon and the astral parasite until it's too late.

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I don't think demons care enough to want to take your energy like that. They're divine beings that already have all they need, why would they go out of their way to do that.

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I've seen videos talking about how a demon raped them, and I'm sorry but that would absolutely not happen. That's either their subconscious being afraid of the demon in question, or an astral parasite.

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I'm not saying you can't have adverse experiences with demons but this is usually not the case and the work of a parasitic entity at least in my personal gnosis.