u/Acceptable-Peanut126

My damn husband broke my vagina. I never had any issues until we got together. We’ve been together for 5 years now. Within months of us having unprotected sex for the first time, I got chronic UTIS, BV and yeast infections. I even got fucking genital herpes. He has never had an outbreak but I can only assume he’s carrying it???!

My infections were so chronic and I had no clue what Ureaplasma was. Then suddenly a month or so before our wedding, everything went back to normal. I finally had a normal vagina.

Then while I am 16 weeks pregnant, the infections come back with vengeance. Green discharge, burning, pain, rawness, everything. I’m testing negative for bv and yeast. Finally I come across mycoplasma and ureaplasma. I test positive right away on just a urine culture. I do a Juno test and it confirms the same thing. I can’t treat it with doxy while pregnant but I’m absolutely spiralling with learning the potential complications. I took azithromycin another round of metro and about 2 months after that, my symptoms subsided completely. I was normal again!!! My son is now 1 and everything is great. I haven’t retest because I thought maybe I had balanced my biome with probiotics or maybe the azithromycin did something after all.

We decide we’re ready to try for another baby and BOOM. Symptoms are back but this time different. Luckily I am not in horrible pain the way I was, but I have dark yellow discharge and you can smell the odour on me from across the room. I’m showering multiple times a day, constantly changing my liner etc. but it’s so gross. Not to mention, I don’t want to try and get pregnant again and risk complications. Now in the time to finally treat it and BE DONE. This has been going on since June. I have been doing probiotics suppositories night for 3 months and also boquet for a month.

It did a Juno test but it got lost in the mail going to them, and it’s been tracked but might not make it to them within the 30 days of sample collection. Since I had a positive ureaplasma in my urine culture, I decided to treat it. I’m doing 7 days of doxy plus 2.5 g of azithromycin. My husband’s doing the same.

I have gut issues already, I’ve been on antibiotics so much in my life. The last year alone I did 5 rounds. UTIs, BV, mastitis, post partum stitches ripped and got infected, etc.

I am not young and it took us time to conceive our first baby and I’m so worried I’m running out of time. But I HAVE to deal with this. I’m scared I’m going to wreck my gut and vaginal biomes further so this is really my Hail Mary. I hope so badly that this works and we can just get back in focusing on planning our family and taking care of ourselves. This problem takes up so much space in my mind I’m struggling to have time to do anything for myself outside of work and baby. Any free time I have I’m going down rabbit holes and reading forms.

Looking for support and any further advice.

My doctor is prescribing me doxy + azithromycin. But I’m terrified to start because of some of the crazy side effects I’m reading. I have been on sooooo many antibiotics this last year. But we are trying to conceive so I know I have to get rid of the ureaplasma before I do that 😭

Hi all - I have been searching far and wide for a nanny since February and it’s been a challenge. Some of the reasons: it’s not 40hrs per week, remote ish area/no bus, half child care half housework. During my search I have found that i recieved candidates that could hardly speak any English wanting $40/hour, or professional career Nannies that wanted only to focus on childcare. And everyone wanted full time hours. I don’t blame anyone! It’s just not what I could offer and not what I need.

Fast forward to August, when I really got in a crunch and was needing to find childcare soon, I met my current nanny and she is absolutely wonderful. She checks every box and I just adore her and so does my son. She was in the process of applying for a student visa which would allow her to legally work PT. She is currently on a tourist visa. She then figured out that to be approved for a student visa you have to actually be in school full time (which would prevent her from being able to work during the day).

I would like to sponsor her and go through the whole LMIA process but 1. I’m hearing mixed things like nannies are not being approved and 2. I’m reading that if it is approved, she has to back to her home country and apply for her work permit there before returning which could take up to 12 weeks.

Does anyone have a GYN reco that takes these issues seriously in Ontario? I’m just outside of Toronto. When pregnant I brought my Juno results to my OBGYN and she basically laughed at them. Everything is coming back negative but I have BV symptoms. Metrogel isn’t doing anything.

My baby was severely colic and slept no more than 1 hour at a time for the first 6 months of his life. For every single nap he had to be bounced in a yoga ball with the sound of rain blaring for 30 minutes. He didn’t have a bed time routine despite our efforts because he would scream from 5-10 every night. There was no cute bath book bottle routine. We got there though. I’m hindsight, this definitely caused some PPD/PPA for me. He is now a wonderful toddler full of life and happiness. I’d say he’s very strong willed and not the easiest, but I’m happy with where we are at.

Over the course of the first year of his life, I really struggled with hearing comments from either childless people OR comments from those with very easy tempered babies. I totally thought before I had him that I’d “make” him be a go with the flow, out and about baby. Boy was I humbled. When speaking to other moms, they are always taking credit for the things they didn’t make their baby “easy”. Like you think I want to be a slave to a nap schedule or be stuck at home all the time because he is screaming for hours on end and I’m in the verge of a breakdown? Trust me I tried but I eventually had to surrender for my baby’s wellbeing and my own mental health. Don’t get me wrong, regardless of how easy your baby is, having a new born is hard and getting through those days is something to be proud of. But damn the implications that I did or didn’t do something and that’s why his temperament is what is is makes me want to scream. I remember one time when he was 6 weeks old I was actively trying to get him out and attended a gathering at my MIL and as I was dealing with a colic baby in real time, bouncing him in the carrier as he screamed, someone proceeded to tell me that I just needed to go with the flow more, and how she brought 1 week old to a party and it was totally fine because she just went with the flow.

There are many more of these comments I hear and they sting so badly. I feel like one day im going to blow up at someone because of them because that is what is going on in my head internally but I just keep quiet. If I open my mouth it’s not going to be good. How do you deal with comments like this when people have no idea what it’s like to deal with a colic baby that doesn’t sleep? It’s really starting to get to me and it’s causing me a lot of internal distress. I feel like I need to address the comments head on and without exploding.

We are TTC and I have a history of cyclical infections. The hormone change in my luteal phase has a tendency to throw off my ph allowing any bad bacteria to overgrow. It’s almost a guarantee I will get an infection if my husband finishes inside me right before my luteal phase.

I personally don’t like when my husband finishes inside me. I don’t like the leakage it causes etc so it only happens around ovulation. But of course it needs to happen to conceive. We can’t afford artificial insemination so that isn’t an option.

If we weren’t TTC, I would take some steps to get my ph down right after as I’ve seen here, such as boric acid right after for a few days. But if there is a chance that cycle I could have gotten pregnant, boric acid isn’t safe.

Has anyone dealt with this before and what did you do to proactively get your ph down in response to the havoc sperm does to your microbiome ?

It’s literally a horrible cycle of getting bv, doing metro, then getting a yeast infection, etc. I have done Juno bio I do have 0.80% ureaplasma parvum. But the advice I received is that most vaginas have this and it’s not a large enough colony to actually be causing symptoms. I have a huge amount of gardnerella and have done metro, vitamin c, probiotics orally and suppositories, etc.

My son just turned 1 and I’m getting older. We know we want two children but wish we could wait a few years but time is not on our side. The problem is that my husband and I are traumatized by the newborn stage. I saw a sweet newborn the other day and it actually triggered a physical nervous system response. Our baby was extremely colic for 6 months. I didn’t sleep for more than 1 or 2 hours straight for at least 4 months. My pregnancy was horrific. It was hard on our marriage and our mental health.

I’m just hoping to hear from those who had a similar baby and were able to get through these thoughts to try for another.

Please note I am not looking to hear that I should wait longer, or that it’s fine to just have 1. Those aren’t options really. I feel like I’m just going to have to do it scared and I want to find away around that.

TLDR: how to keep ph low enough for probiotics to actually colonize.

I have been having bv and yeast infections for years on and off. I didn’t have one since last April and it was horrible, lasted a few months. Usually they are like clockwork in my luteal phase.

I just had bv and metrogel now gave me a raging yeast infection so I’m doing a round of Taro. Everytime I do this it’s like I’m wiping out all my good and bad bacteria. I’ve done a Juno bio test and I am very low in lactobacillus. I take probiotics daily and have also done probiotic suppositories. But they don’t seem to actually stick. I did another Juno test after my protocol and it seemed pretty unchanged. I also have ph strips and it seems like my vaginal environment might be too alkaline and not acidic for the probiotics to actually colonize. This is definitely hormonal as it seems my ph goes way up during my 2 week luteal phase making it the perfect environment for bad bacteria to thrive.

Is there a way I can keep my ph down to give the lactobacillus a chance?

I went for about 4 years with chronic BV, yeast infections, etc. if I didn’t have one I’d have the other. Almost 1000% of the time.

Finally they suddenly stopped in April of 2024. I got pregnant in October 2024 and they started up again during my pregnancy BADLY and worse than ever from March 2025-June 2025 and have been clear since. I had my baby in the summer of 2025.

Since last month we have been TTC and everytime my husband doesn’t pull out, my PH gets thrown off and I get BV. I have PH test strips that indicate my ph is normally high, thin discharge that smells. I did a round of boric acid last month followed by vitamin c suppositories and it seemed to help but maybe not clear it completely. The smell was so bad last month you could probably smell me from across the room. It was horrific and only calmed down once my period arrived.

Fast forward to this month I just finished ovulating and here we are again. The problem this time is that boric acid isn’t safe if you might have conceive so I would like to avoid that. I also want to avoid metro gel if possible bc it leads to raging yeast infections. I just added a probiotic suppository but wtf!!! If we are TTC I can’t avoid this.

Any suggestions or advice are welcome 😭

EDIT: he always showers / cleans himself prior to sex and I also pee and shower after sex.

Hi everyone! I just hired my first nanny. She will be starting soon while I work PT from home. Her schedule falls in such a way that she will have quite a bit of downtime (2.5 hrs) while my son naps and she has agreed to doing some household work. Things like tidying, cleaning, laundry, meal prep, etc. Because I’m freelance, there might be days where I don’t work at all.

I want to ask both Nannie’s and employers what kinds of systems work well for you? How do you plan your day or week? I want to set her up for success and be clear with what is expected. I want to avoid misunderstandings but also not micromanage.

I’m thinking of writing out almost like a “brief” each day. This would include when I’m working, when I’ll be in meetings, what needs to be done around the house, etc. it feels like a lot of work though. Any tips you can share?

Can anyone offer any advice here on what I need to do to get myself set up correctly? I plan on speaking to an accountant but if I can keep costs there minimal and figure most of it out on my own, I’d rather do that.

Thanks in advance.

I posted a while back on here how incompatible my job is with being a parent. I felt so stuck. I felt like I had to choose - keep the career or give it up entirely because there were no options in my field to scale back. I didn’t want to give up my financial independence and also throw away everything I’ve built over the last decade, but i also didn’t want to burn out and I was on track to get there.

Well, I’ve just accepted an offer as a contractor which will allow me to work PT and pick up projects as I go. It’s truly a unicorn opportunity. I’m losing some job security and stability and entering into an unknown territory a bit as a sole proprietor, but I’ll have more breathing room for my family, my health and just for me to show up as the best parent I can be.

I’m really scared to be honest, but this feels right. I could use some words of encouragement right now!

Hi everyone - I’ve never in all my years of driving been afraid or had anxiety. Then one point in my life I was going through a stressful time and had a panic attack on the highway going to work. My body felt paralyzed, I couldn’t breath, and I felt like I was either going to lose control of my car or slam on my breaks which would have been dangerous. I’ve tried a few times since and it’s just a nightmare everytime.

I realize that the only way to get over this fear is to do it, but I feel like it’s genuinely dangerous. I haven’t been on a highway in 6 years and I feel so dumb for it. It impacts my life. I rely on people for rides, my husband always has to drive, etc. I even avoid working in areas where I have to take the highway. One job o had would have taken me 30 mins to get there but bc I don’t take highways, it would take me 1.5 hrs. I feel like it’s really limiting my life and I just want to get over this. I also have a child now. And I don’t want my kids growing up seeing their mom have such an irrational fear and potentially take that on themselves. I just do not know what to do.

Can anyone share their success stories on what they did?

My baby is about to turn 1 in a week or so.

think he’s ok, he does babble and make good eye contact, laugh etc. but he isn’t saying any words. Not even close. I try to point to everything and he doesn’t really follow my finger to look at what I’m pointing to.

I’ve been clapping and waving like a circus monkey for months and feel like I’m doing something wrong. I narrate everything. I feel defeated and worry a bit. Especially seeing so many posts of all the gestures and words babies his age are doing on here.

Anyone go through something similar?

EDIT: I’m in Canada and to my knowledge early intervention has a huge waitlist

EDIT 2: he’s always been really focused on physical milestones. He was and early roller and crawler, and just took 2 steps on his own yesterday. Maybe he’s trying to master those skills first?

Hi all I’m just wondering if anyone has tips on staying in good shape. It feels like everytime I resume my strength training program, at some point I pull or strain something or get some sort of flare and I’m out of commission for weeks. It’s really frustrating bc I’m so committed to this and it feels like I’m banging my head against the wall.

I understand form is critical but there is zero margin for error ever. Even if my form is slightly off for 1 rep I could be out for weeks. I’m feeling so defeated and I have a baby that I want to be strong for.

I have a really happy life and a great husband and baby. I love my husbands family like my own and am very blessed and continue to practice gratitude for them. My Mil has been incredible as I have become a mother myself.

I’ve always felt the weight and loneliness of being an only child and there are moments that just sting because I’m reminded that no matter how close I am with my husbands family, they aren’t my own. His sisters will always choose eachother, my MIL will always choose her daughters etc and I TOTALLY understand that. It’s just isolating. All of my best friends are so close to their families and own sisters as well.

They are an amazing extended family so it doesn’t feel like it often but for example all of our husbands are away this weekend, and my SILs are together helping the one with kids as is my MIL. All my friends are with their moms or sisters and I am just all alone.

I also know all of this could be ripped away from me if something were to happen to my marriage. Idk. Just really feeling it today. How do you deal with the loneliness?

My almost 1 year old was a very early army crawler. We thought for sure he’d be crawling by 5 months but he was stuck for months in this army crawling phase. It wasn’t until someone showed me how to help him make the connection to crawl on his hands and knees that he had that aha moment and was crawling in a week.

Fast forward, he’s almost been walking for 3 months maybe more now. He stands up straight right from the floor on his own without pulling up, he’s been cruising on furniture for a long time and absolutely rips it around the house pushing one of those walkers around.

Everytime I try to hold my hands out in front of him to walk he just can’t seem to take a step though. I’m wondering if there is some sort of connection I can help him with so he can get to walking, like we did with crawling. He’s also an incredibly fast bear crawler and his goal right now is speed haha so maybe it’s just a preference?

All tips welcome! Just wanna support him.

Hello! I’m a FTM about to hire a nanny.

I know how incredibly difficult it can be to do your job when you don’t feel trusted and if you feel micromanaged and I don’t want to do that.

However, I am quite an anxious person with some personal history that makes me nervous about leaving my child alone with someone who isn’t a very close friend or family. Unfortunately we don’t have much of a village near by. I will be WFH and am happy to give the nanny space she needs to do her job in that sense, but I don’t know if I’ll ever feel comfortable actually leaving the house which I really want to be able to do.

For anyone that has this challenge, how do you build trust with your nanny that allows you to get to a place to be able to do this?

Hello! My LO is 11 months old and I have been experiencing some pretty bad tendonitis.

First off is mommy thumb - I have this from picking him up and hooking my thumb under his armpits, but also from holding him. He’s always wanting to be held but is also always pushing off and I am repeatedly using my thumb to keep him close. I have figured out how to pick him up without straining my thumb but it still comes and goes.

Second is my rotator cuffs. His crib mattress is on the floor basically and his crib is really low. I can’t make it higher or he will be able to climb out. But the process of doing almost a weighted lateral raise awkwardly picking him up out of his crib has caused a lot of shoulder strain.

I’m in decent shape and consider myself to be pretty strong, but these awkward movements that I have to repeat are causing me to constantly restrain these tendons.

I’ve been going to physio and it helps but I just keep reinjuring it. My husband will take over when it’s really bad and it gives me time to heal but as soon as I start again, it comes back. My husband is also working during the day so I have no choice but to pick him up and put him on his crib for naps etc.

Has anyone experienced this and what helped you?

My son is 11 months and basically never stops moving. He’s not walking yet but he’s cruising, climbing stairs, climbing on everything he can reach. He has zero interest in “typical” baby activities. Books get grabbed and bitten, not looked at. Flashcards get completely ignored. Any toys don’t really get played with just either climbed or chewed on. I set up a water table and he abandoned it immediately.

What he DOES love is pushing heavy things around (his favorite object right now is a big chair he shoves across the room), pulling on stuff, biting/mouthing things, and climbing. Feels like he wants a ton of sensory and proprioceptive input, heavy work, resistance, texture, that kind of thing.

He’s social and engaged otherwise, great eye contact, laughs a lot. Just zero patience for anything static. He absolutely loses it or just has no interest.

Looking for:
-Activity ideas for a kid who wants heavy pushing/pulling/resistance work
-Sensory play that doesn’t require sitting still
-How you’ve worked in language/gestures for a kid like this (no waving/clapping/talking yet)
-Toy or setup recs that actually held your mover’s attention

Would love to hear what’s worked for other sensory-seeking, on-the-go babies!