u/SAINTnumberFIVE

I left the house late today and had to walk up to the market. It was just around sunset when I left, but there was still 30 minutes of light left. Enough for me to get to the market.

A portion of my walk is along a main road. It’s a four lane road, flanked by the back walls of the subdivisions, and one empty field. Two lanes on each side with a center region which is sometimes a left turn lane and sometimes a virtual island, bike lanes on the side, then sidewalks. It’s not extremely busy, but at times, gets enough traffic that I often have to wait to for a few cars to pass to cross.

There’s not any parking along the side of the road. If you pull to the side, you are a quarter in the bike lane and three quarters in the driving lane.

So I was walking along, passing the field, and traffic was sparse, but along comes this big black pickup truck with tinted windows in the opposite direction, passes me, does an instant U turn in the middle of the road and then pulls up alongside me. I ignore and keep walking, get a few feet ahead and it pulls up alongside me again, cracks the window but I don’t stop to try to see in because I have no business with this person and they have no legit business with me. They know me? No they don’t. Need directions? No they don’t.

I keep walking. A light turns green a few hundred feet away around the curve and more cars come along. This time the trucks stays where it is.

I turn the nearest corner into a subdivision and continue to my destination amongst the safety of the houses, looking back a few times.

It was dark by the time I left the market, and typically I’d go back the same way because it’s generally safer, but not this time. This time I took the other way, walking up the dark, narrow sidewalk of the street on the other side of the block, in case the truck was still there by the field waiting for me.

When I got home, I didn’t tell my father what happened. He already flips out at the thought of me leaving the house if there’s a chance I won’t be home before it starts to get dark.

I won’t tell my brother because he thinks women are too cautious, and he’ll think I’m over reacting and that my detour was unnecessary.

My father and brother exist at opposite ends of a spectrum of men, yet to both, I will somehow be wrong.

Wrong doing something completely normal like running to the market, and wrong doing something completely reasonable like taking steps to protect myself in the face of a perceived threat.

That’s the thing about living life as female. Somehow, doing the ordinary, doing the reasonable, encountering misfortune. Somehow it always puts us in the wrong.

So here it is. Taking a sh!t with endometriosis can feel like your insides are being ripped out.
That is not an exaggeration.

Why isn’t there more research into the cause and treatment for this? why isn’t this talked about more? Why aren’t there disclaimers on bottles of Motrin and Advil about excessive period pain being abnormal?

Why are so many women left in the dark about this and forced to live with what is essentially monthly scheduled torture?

My mom’s cat walked in without his collar a few days ago, she waiter 24 hours to tell me, and the last location update the AirTag gave was over a mile away on the freeway the same day he lost his collar. It’s shared with my phone so I went over that way to look for it but without luck. This is a fairly populated area with a lot of commuters who are iPhone users so I’m guessing the AirTag isn’t updating because it’s no more and either got compacted in a trash truck after someone found the collar and threw it away or it got snagged on the underside of a car or truck he rubbed against (yeah, they let him out), and fell off on the freeway after the last update and got crunched or the battery fell it.

I hate unsolved mysteries and it would sure be nice if the AirTag could indicate battery loss in it’s last breath. Like they could have a little capacity that holds just enough charge for it to say “Oh no! I’ve lost my battery! Here’s where I am! Goodbye!”

I swear to God it feels like Hawaii right now. It’s so hot and humid that it smells like it just rained though it hasn’t today. I haven’t experienced anything like this in my over 40 years in Southern California.

For newcomers to the area, this is absolutely NOT normal. September is usually hot but also usually incredibly dry, both the ground and air.

In fact, the humidity should be so low right now that your legs should be itching.

This weather is absolutely bizarre!

I know this is going to sound absolutely silly to most people, but I was standing in the kitchen the other night, eating, looking at the box of Honey Nut Cheerios that my dad left out on the counter, and I realized that the Honey Nut Cheerios bee mascot, “Buzz”, is male.

Guys will frequently counter “males as the human standard” argument with some pseudo logical BS like “Well it makes sense to use “he” because…” or “It makes sense that it’s designed for guys because more guys (blah blah blah),” in an attempt to deny there is a male bias in society, and mask it with something that they think makes some type of sense.

Well, only 1% to 5% of bees are male, and they are rarely ever seen out of the hive, and as someone pointes out, only female bees have stingers, so why is Buzz referred to by the company as male?

Then I realized, all cereal mascots are male. Tony Tiger, Count Chocula, Rice Crispy’s Snap, Crackle and Pop, Cap’n Crunch, the three Cinnomon Toast Cruch bakers. Fruit Loops Tucan Sam, that Lucky Charms Leprechaun, the Trix rabbit, the Honey Smacks frog.

Female mascots only show up on cereal boxes making guest appearances on limited addition. The one cereal that had a permanent female mascot was Honey Loops, and that was discontinued years ago, and that mascot started off as male.

Just to name a few, compared to Humans:

Vulcans are stronger, more logical, have excellent impulse control, touch telepathy, long lives, can tolerate hot temperatures, and have a better sense of smell.

Romulans are Vulcans without the impulse control.

Klingons are stronger and have redundant vital organs.

Betazoids are telepathic, stronger.

Ferengis are stronger and generally more peaceful, because wars are bad for commerce.

Lanthanites: Extremely long lived.

Cardassians: More heat tolerant. Maybe better memories.

Andorrans: Have extreme cold tolerance, extra sensory antenna.

Aenar: A sub class Andorrans that also have extreme cold tolerance, but have telepathic abilities to make up for their blindness.

Q: God like.

But what do humans really have? It has been revealed that Vulcans fear humans because humans exist somewhere between Vulcans and Klingons behaviorally, and had advanced more rapidly than Vulcans, but that seems kind of weak.

No, your wonderful dog that you don’t want or can’t keep for some reason is NOT friendly! Your dog is AGGRESSIVE with everyone except adult women! That is not a friendly dog!

There I was sitting in the living room looking at my phone when I heard a young boy screaming/crying. Not unusual, as there are a lot of kids in the neighborhood. But I thought I started to hear him scream “No! No!” so I went to look out the front window and saw a man standing in front of the open side door to a beat up white utility van parked next to the curb next door, and I couldn’t see the boy, but I could hear he was in there screaming “No! Get away from me! Get away! And the man was reaching inside.

My heart jumped into my throat as I thought I was witnessing a kidnapping attempt. But as I reached for my phone to call 911, I realized the man didn’t seem to be fighting to restrain anyone, and a second later, he reached farther in and then turned around with the boy in his hands, set him down, and lead him into the house. It was the kid’s grandfather and the kid wasn’t supposed to be in the van and didn’t want to be taken out.

Like jeez kid!

It’s absolutely fucking ridiculous how many times I’ve needed to be re-evaluated for some of my disabilities just because it’s been a while since I’ve been diagnosed or seen a specialist for it. Like magic is not going to happen here! My genome is not going to edit itself!

We had a birthday party here the other day and had a cake. Just a conventional birthday cake with buttercream frosting. I used to live for these things and the more frosting the better, and I could eat multiple slices with no issue, but now? I still want the cake but I can only eat a few bites before feeling sick. When I think about the cake, my brain screams yes, my tastebuds scream yes, but my stomach screams no.

About 18 years ago, I discovered the most comfortable shoes I’ve ever come across. It’s difficult for me to find comfortable shoes that fit right, so this was significant. These shoes were so comfortable that I looked forward to putting them on in the morning, and for many years, they were the only shoes I wore. I’d wear them until the uppers started to separate from the midsoles and they couldn’t be repaired, but I would keep the shoes in hopes that I could someday repair them. When the retail stock ran out, I started buying them on eBay. When the new ones on eBay ran out, I started buying the lightly used ones. I did that for many years until I could no longer find them in my size and eventually I had to find another shoe. After about two or three years, I found a shoe that was comfortable enough, but still did not reach the level of comfort of my favorite shoe. Occasionally, I would cruise eBay to see if more showed up. A while back, I got lucky and found a pair so purchased them. At this point, I was able to make due with my new model of shoe so I put my favorite ones aside. Well recently, the shoes I had been wearing had become too worn, and I ordered a new pair, but they’re not here yet. My feet were sore because I have some type of arthritis and I’m having a flare, so I thought hey, how about I break out that pair of favorite shoes that I stashed away. My God they are heaven. Right when I put them on, I remembered why I looked forward to putting them on every day. They’re just so comfortable that they’re indescribable. I love them so much that if I ever came into a very, very large sum of money, I’d commission another batch from the company that makes them.

Edit: Because people are curious, they are Nike Air Edge 2008 Trainers.

I used to wear sports bras which I would just throw in the wash but post mastectomy and reconstruction due to breast cancer, I have to wear bras with more complex support structures. I’d like to maintain the support they provide but I don’t want to spend more time hand washing them than necessary and I’m not sure which is the best detergent to use. They eventually start to yellow from oil build up and I’ve had no luck removing it with Dawn dish detergent.

There. I said it. I’m tired of this “protector of women” myth among trad men of a certain political demographic. You know who they are.

They’re easy to identify in my community. I was walking the other evening and walked past a house of one of these guys. Flags everywhere, big white truck, considers himself a protector of his family but he has three little girls and won’t be around to take care of them forever. Doesn’t consider what happens when she gets pregnant because of a lack of mandatory sex Ed, has birth complications that require a medical abortion, but can’t find a provider willing to do it for out of fear of prosecution. He doesn’t understand federal funding of science or how vital it is to the advancement of research and treatments of women’s health issues. He doesn’t know that the treatment for the most aggressive form of breast cancer a woman can get was developed using federal funding at a university, or how many lives it has saved. He’s afraid to talk or hear about periods and is completely ignorant on most of women’s issues, and doesn’t consider what’s going to happen when daddy’s not around anymore, and his daughters are stuck in a relationship with an abuser but can’t get a divorce, and his daughters don’t have their own voice to defend or protect themselves because he’s voted that away.

If you vote for people who act counter to the interest of girls and women, you are absolutely not a protector of girls and women.

I don’t mean I don’t like the design, which I don’t, I mean, they actually don’t work. when I go to leave a comment on a post, I can’t highlight any text in these text boxes to edit it easily and half the time the comment won’t post. Because I can’t highlight what I’ve written to copy it, or delete it, I have to cancel the reply, reload the page, and literally start all over. i’m sorry I don’t mean to be hypocritical, but I feel for a that for a website that has been around for over 17 years, this issue shouldn’t happen.

This will prevent you from committing embarrassing faux pas like asking if a sibling or spouse is a parent or if a parent is a nanny.

This happened a few years ago but still makes me kind of chuckle. My mother’s boyfriend is a music professional and occasionally he needs vocalist last minute so he calls me. I’m just someone who very occasionally does professional work. He’s producing/engineering a song for a client and needs a female vocalist so I went down to the studio on an uncomfortably warm October night.

Let me tell you something. Most of his clients suck, and this guy was no exception. First off, he wasn’t there. Second, he refused to remain available to give us feedback so that we could ensure that the product was to his liking.

Mom’s boyfriend insisted that the client wanted the song sung in a high register, and while Freddie Mercury and I can hit the same high notes, the register that my ‘s boyfriend insisted his client wanted sung in, was unnaturally high for me, and to be quite honest, it sounded like crap at that octave. I couldn’t quite place why, but it did. One thing we do know, though is that I was not singing off key and we know this because we made damn sure to check to make sure that every single note I sung was the proper note, because I told my ‘s boyfriend, if he hates it, at least I want to be able to prove that I’m singing it on key.

Anyway, we were in there for hours, it was hot , and grueling, and at the end of it we had a song that was hitting all the right notes, and still sounded like crap. But this is what he insisted the client wanted, and the client wasn’t there to tell us other wise, so we sent it along and called it a night.

The next morning, the client calls. He hates the song, he says it sounds like crap, and while I thoroughly agreed with that assessment, he then accused me of singing off key.

Sir, your song did sound like crap, this is what we thought you wanted and you did not want to stick around to tell us otherwise, but I can 100% assure you, it was absolutely 100% on key.

I don’t know. Maybe because a disabled person with a history of cancer and no transportation isn’t exactly the most appealing applicant to your average suburban employer.