u/Alt_when_Im_not_ok

Levi
‘s favorite band was counting crows
And he said Prince was for fags
I was six and he was twelve
And even though I know it’s wrong
I still believe everything he said

Went to a doctor this morning to get a home sleep study test for sleep apnea. He asked a lot of incredibly specific questions about the content of my nightmares, which was weird. Then we got into when I sleep and I tried to skirt around it but my N24 came out. The reason I didn't want to talk about it? Because he did not believe me, which is what I figured. Told me it would go away if when I got sleepy early, i took a walk around the block instead.

Things got very tense after that and I ended up walking out. My wife (thank god) was able to talk him into saying yes to the at home sleep study. I'm so sick of doctors not taking me seriously.

Its sort of my fault, the best way to deal with doctors is to act like an idiot and I forgot that. Pretend you dont have the internet and state your symptoms as if you dont realize maybe it has a name. They get such a little thrill out of being the one to name it, they feel put out when you have actually done your own research. Fragile little things, doctors. Things might have gone differently if I had stuck to this, but I forgot to not be lulled into him respecting him as a person. Gotta remember to treat them like toddlers with a prescription pad.

Footage shows what life is really like behind those walls

Location:
Alvin S Glenn Detention Center
Columbia, South Carolina

The shame of being awake when you said you'd be asleep. Because your cycle isn't always 100% consistent. So someone asked you to do something and you had to turn them down. And they of course didn't understand the reason. Just gave you that confused look like you had said "I can't, I have to be on Jupiter then."

But now you are still awake . . . you could've done it . . . it feels like you always get it wrong. Your condition makes you useless.

And you try so hard to plan it out. So much anxiety to making a calendar.

anyone else ever feel this way?

I don't feel like I "am" this body. i perceive myself as a spirit inside a corpse. moving it and manipulating it but utterly distinct. the body is already dead.

i'll probably get over it dont worry

Jeni

Basic half hour introduction to Dionysus. Isn't going to teach an adept anything new. But it is a good introduction that isn't too sugar coating and is mostly great because it absolutely full of great visual art.

edit: available on Amazon Prime and Tubi