u/yashh26

I am 17M and the only child of my parents, born nearly two decades after their marriage.

People often say being an only child is a blessing, and maybe it is in some ways, but definitely not in all ways. You carry all family burdens alone with no sibling to share the load or even talk to is incredibly isolating.

Being late-born is the scariest part. My parents are already in their mid-50s. My father works almost half of a day at his shop just to survive. It is exhausting to watch my peers live a chill life while I struggle. I feel immense guilt. If I help with household chores, my intermediate studies suffer. If I study, I feel like a bad son.

I want to pursue a BSCS. In my city, we only have a small campus of SIBA but here opportunities are extremely limited and campus is mostly filled with local female students whose families don't want to send them out of the city. For growth, Karachi is the main hub of opportunities, and I know I have to move there for my career.

But when I move to Karachi, who will take care of my parents? I also have a permanent visual disability (monocular vision), Despite this, I want to be successful to give my parents the life they truly deserve. My ultimate dream is to go abroad and work in top-tier tech companies like Google or Microsoft.

We can't even rely on relatives. In this cruel world, even your own family doesn't look at each other without seeing some benefit.

I need real, practical advice from people who have been in my shoes:

To all the only children out there, what advice do you have to make my life much easier? What are the struggles or challenges (maybe hidden ones) that I might face down?

My long-term plan is to go abroad for a Master’s degree to transition into a global tech company. But if I go abroad alone, what happens to my elderly parents back home? If I somehow manage to take them with me, how will I handle the pressure? Will I focus on my Master's studies, my career skills, or taking care of them in a completely new country? This entire situation feels like it’s going to be absolute hell for my mental health. Has any only-child gone through this?

Honestly, I feel completely stuck and paralyzed. I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt every single day watching my father work 11 hours at the shop and my mother handle the house. I want to step up and help them with daily chores right now, but whenever I do, it messes up my studies and prep for 12th grade. Tbh, I just want them to rest, and I want to rest too. I am so tired of this cycle. It hurts deeply to see my peers living a chill, fun life while my parents and I are constantly struggling just to survive. How do you balance helping your struggling parents right now without completely destroying the grades/studies you need to rescue them in the future?

Please give me actionable suggestions on how to manage and take care of my parents while building my future in tech. How do I do this without completely exhausting myself, destroying my mental health, or burning out to the point where I end up accomplishing nothing at all?

\- TY to anyone who reads this and shares their advice :) ❤️

I am 17M and the only child of my parents, born nearly two decades after their marriage.

People often say being an only child is a blessing, and maybe it is in some ways, but definitely not in all ways. You carry all family burdens alone with no sibling to share the load or even talk to is incredibly isolating.

Being late-born is the scariest part. My parents are already in their mid-50s. My father works almost half of a day at his shop just to survive. It is exhausting to watch my peers live a chill life while I struggle. I feel immense guilt. If I help with household chores, my intermediate studies suffer. If I study, I feel like a bad son.

I want to pursue a BSCS. In my city, we only have a small campus of SIBA but here opportunities are extremely limited and campus is mostly filled with local female students whose families don't want to send them out of the city. For growth, Karachi is the main hub of opportunities, and I know I have to move there for my career.

But when I move to Karachi, who will take care of my parents? I also have a permanent visual disability (monocular vision), Despite this, I want to be successful to give my parents the life they truly deserve. My ultimate dream is to go abroad and work in top-tier tech companies like Google or Microsoft.

We can't even rely on relatives. In this cruel world, even your own family doesn't look at each other without seeing some benefit.

I need real, practical advice from people who have been in my shoes:

To all the only children out there, what advice do you have to make my life much easier? What are the struggles or challenges (maybe hidden ones) that I might face down?

My long-term plan is to go abroad for a Master’s degree to transition into a global tech company. But if I go abroad alone, what happens to my elderly parents back home? If I somehow manage to take them with me, how will I handle the pressure? Will I focus on my Master's studies, my career skills, or taking care of them in a completely new country? This entire situation feels like it’s going to be absolute hell for my mental health. Has any only-child gone through this?

Honestly, I feel completely stuck and paralyzed. I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt every single day watching my father work 11 hours at the shop and my mother handle the house. I want to step up and help them with daily chores right now, but whenever I do, it messes up my studies and prep for 12th grade. Tbh, I just want them to rest, and I want to rest too. I am so tired of this cycle. It hurts deeply to see my peers living a chill, fun life while my parents and I are constantly struggling just to survive. How do you balance helping your struggling parents right now without completely destroying the grades/studies you need to rescue them in the future?

Please give me actionable suggestions on how to manage and take care of my parents while building my future in tech. How do I do this without completely exhausting myself, destroying my mental health, or burning out to the point where I end up accomplishing nothing at all?

\- TY to anyone who reads this and shares their advice :) ❤️

Hey everyone,

17M,

I am posting this because I feel completely isolated and just need to get this off my chest.

To give you some bg, I was born with permanent monocular vision (only have vision in one eye), which deeply affects my depth perception and balance. I am also shorter than average for a guy. Because of this, I face constant staring and mocking from people outside and also I am a massive introvert with severe overthinking habits. I don't really have friends or siblings to talk to.

Today, I had a terrible incident. I went to drop off food for my dad, and on my way back, someone offered me a lift on a bike. The bike had no rear handle, and both of my hands were full holding bags. Because of my vision and balance issues, I fell off the moving bike right in front of a crowd.

The physical injuries (scraped knees and hands) hurt, but the intense embarrassment and the way people stared at me made me feel completely crushed.

After coming back home, the feeling of humiliation has been overwhelming (feeling like to disappear as if i never existed)

All I just wanted to vent. How do I cope with this extreme level of social anxiety, embarrassment, and the constant urge to hide from the world after something like this happens?

AOA all,

I’m a 2nd year FSc pre-medical student from rural Sindh. I didn’t properly study my 11th. I had joined an online academy and tried self study too but couldn’t stay consistent. Then I found out I had some vision problem because of which I can’t pursue medicine. Becoming a neurosurgeon was my dream since 9th grade, so it took me some time to figure out what to do. Eventually I developed interest in CS and decided to go for BSCS.

I’m planning for FAST-NUCES and IBA Karachi, and since I’m pre-medical I will need to give and pass Additional Maths exam for FAST. I’m also considering a gap year.

The main problem is my 11th is basically on scratch. Somehow I gave my 11th exams and passed, but honestly in rural areas you know how the “paisa do, marks lo” system works 😭 so I don’t actually have the concepts.

Now 12th has started and I feel like I need to properly study both 11th and 12th, but I genuinely don’t know how to manage both.

Academy is already ahead in 12th and I don’t want to just rush everything and memorize without understanding.

I’m thinking of using YouTube for proper concepts and academy as secondary.

Since I want to do CS, Maths and Physics are especially important for me.

So what should I do? Focus mainly on 12th and fix 11th alongside it, or give more time to 11th first?

Anyone who has been in a similar situation or knows solution of my problem, please guide me 😭

AOA all,

16y/o, FSc student here (2nd year)

Actually currently im enrolled in pre-med, but due to some health issues, i wanna pursue cs (im sure k interested hu).

I thought that I should learn something about cs to mene dekha ke bohot se log bol rhe the k "Harvard's CS50x" best choice hai, to i tried today, but within few mins i struggled "sab kuch sar ke neeche se chala gaya🙂"

As i told ke me premed me hu to i have no bg in cs n also i am beginner to what can I do?

Even yesterday i was so confused but still i thought to try unpreparedly but nhi ho saka so thori si guidance dedein to acha hoga (jinhone me cs50x complete krdia hai woh)

And also assignments and Github, VScode..😭

AOA all,

16y/o, FSc student here (2nd year)

Actually currently im enrolled in pre-med, but due to some health issues, i wanna pursue cs (im sure k interested hu).

I thought that I should learn something about cs to mene dekha ke bohot se log bol rhe the k "Harvard's CS50x" best choice hai, to i tried today, but within few mins i struggled "sab kuch sar ke neeche se chala gaya🙂"

As i told ke me premed me hu to i have no bg in cs n also i am beginner to what can I do?

Even yesterday i was so confused but still i thought to try unpreparedly but nhi ho saka so thori si guidance dedein to acha hoga (jinhone me cs50x complete krdia hai woh)

And also assignments and Github, VScode..😭

Hey everyone.

I’m 16M from Pakistan, and I’m around 5’1” (155 cm).

I’ve been really worried about my height for the past few weeks. Before this, height was honestly never this important to me. It wasn’t the center of my attention or something I thought about all the time. But recently, it somehow became a huge thing in my mind😭.

From what I’ve noticed, I’m shorter than many guys around me, even i have seen few guys getting taller suddenly (Growth sprout).

The problem is that this isn’t just a small insecurity anymore. It’s actually affecting my daily life.

For the past few weeks, I’ve been stressing and overthinking about my height so much that I’m not able to do the things I normally do. I’m in intermediate right now, so studies and entry test prep are obviously important, but I can’t focus on them the way I should. So many times I don’t even attend class properly or skip them.

Instead, I end up staying in my room, scrolling on my phone, crying, stressing and overthinking. A huge part of my day is basically spent doing this.

Even things I normally enjoy, like gaming or watching series, don’t feel as enjoyable anymore. It honestly feels like I have this constant headache in my mind because I keep thinking about the same thing again and again.

I also have permanent monocular vision, so that’s another thing I already have to deal with. I know it’s unrelated to height, but I’m mentioning it because sometimes I feel like I already have something that makes my life a little different from other people, and now I’m stressing over another thing too.

(The fear of people judging me)

Nobody actually teases me about my height right now.

But my brain keeps telling me, “If nobody is teasing you today, that doesn’t mean nobody ever will.”🙃

I keep thinking about what it would be like to be an adult at 5’0” or 5’1” and have people make jokes or judge me because of it.😶

Maybe I’m overthinking it, but I genuinely feel like society is actually pretty harsh toward short guys.

Then there’s also the whole height preference thing.

I know not everyone cares about height, and obviously personality, looks, confidence and character matter too. But let’s be honest, height can matter socially as well.

Sometimes I see people talking about 6’0” as if it’s the ideal height, and I’m just sitting there thinking, “Bro, I’d be happy with 5’8”–5’10”.” 😭

I know there’s no perfect height, and I’m not saying tall guys have no problems. I just wish I was tall and didn’t have to think about height this much.

I’ve also seen guys around my age who are around my height. I’ve never made comments about anyone’s height or looks because I know how much that stuff can hurt (i even wonder "aren't they worried like meh?"🥲

But I’ll be honest: sometimes when I see someone around my height, I feel bad for them too, because my brain immediately thinks about how hard being this short must be.

And then I realize that I’m probably just projecting my own insecurities onto them.

Comparing my height with other people has become really common for me.

I compare myself with this person, then that person, then someone my age, then people I see online, etc.

I know the average Pakistani guy is around 5’6”–5’7”, and being around 5’1” makes me feel really far below average.

Sometimes my thoughts get so negative that I start imagining just isolating myself from society, living alone on mountains, working from my room and avoiding people because it feels safer than constantly worrying about judgment and comments.

I know that sounds extreme. I’m honestly a huge overthinker, and I think I probably make some of these fears much bigger in my head than they actually are.🫠

But that’s genuinely where my mind goes sometimes.

Marriage and relationships are another big concern for me.

Sometimes I genuinely feel like marriage would be extremely difficult for me because of my height. I don’t actually know if that’s true, though, or if I’m just catastrophizing everything.

I know a bone-age X-ray can give an idea about skeletal maturity and remaining growth potential.

But honestly, I’m scared to get one.

In my head, I’ve already kind of accepted that maybe I won’t grow much more, or maybe I’ll only reach around 5’2”.

At the same time, I’m scared that if I actually get the X-ray and find out that I won’t grow taller, it would hit me really hard emotionally.😭

And realistically, I don’t expect to suddenly grow another 5 inches. Even reaching around 5’5” would feel like a big difference (achievement) to me.

I’ve also seen that the average Pakistani woman is around 5’2”, and then there’s the whole heels situation 😭.

What I actually want to know

Is there anyone here who is actually like me?

Someone who is:

\- Short and genuinely struggling with it?

\- Constantly comparing their height with other people?

\- Basically obsessed with height?

\- Worried about what society will think?

\- Worried about relationships or marriage because of height?

\- Or maybe someone who used to be exactly like this but eventually got out of this mindset and started living normally again?

If you used to obsess over your height, what actually helped you?

I’m not really looking for the usual “bro, height doesn’t matter” answer. I want to know what actually changed your mindset.

I’d also like to know:

\- What are the actual advantages and disadvantages of being a short guy?

\- How has being short affected your social life?

\- Has it affected your friendships or relationships?

\- Has it affected you in university or at work?

\- Do people actually treat shorter men differently in professional environments?

\- Have you experienced teasing, rejection or discrimination because of height?

\- Did those things become less important to you as you got older?

\- Can a short guy genuinely have a life that is just as fulfilling, or even better in some ways, than the life of a tall guy?

\- If you’re a short guy who is now comfortable with yourself, what changed?

\- What do you wish you had understood when you were 16?

I’m not looking for fake positivity or someone telling me that height literally has zero effect on anything.

I know height can matter in some situations.

But I also don’t want to spend my teenage years constantly checking, comparing, worrying and imagining every possible negative thing that could happen because of something I may not even be able to control.

Right now, I just want to know whether other guys have gone through this kind of obsession and eventually learned how to stop letting height take over their lives.

If you’ve been through something similar, I’d genuinely like to hear your story.

I am a 16 y/o guy from Pakistan, and I've had monocular vision since birth. One eye has essentially no useful vision, while my right eye is my functioning eye. So naturally, protecting my right eye is extremely important to me.

I’m trying to build my life normally. I want to go to university and pursue Computer Science, stay physically active, go to the gym/play sports, become independent, travel, work, etc.

(I also want to become an entrepreneur.)

I don’t want fear of my vision to make me unnecessarily restrict my life. At the same time, I obviously want to be sensible about protecting the eye I rely on.

So I’m specifically looking for practical, evidence-based advice from people with monocular vision, ophthalmologists/optometrists, or anyone knowledgeable about this.

And also, please tell me: should I pursue Computer Science?

Is there anything specific I should keep in mind regarding eye protection, sports/exercise, everyday activities, university, or spending long hours on a computer?

I’d really appreciate advice from people who have experience with monocular vision, especially those who are studying, working, exercising, or living independently.

And if anyone wants to talk or make a new friend, feel free to DM me. 🙂👍🏻

I am a 16 y/o guy from Pakistan, and I've had monocular vision since birth. One eye has essentially no useful vision, while my right eye is my functioning eye. So naturally, protecting my right eye is extremely important to me.

I’m trying to build my life normally. I want to go to university and pursue Computer Science, stay physically active, go to the gym/play sports, become independent, travel, work, etc.

(I also want to become an entrepreneur.)

I don’t want fear of my vision to make me unnecessarily restrict my life. At the same time, I obviously want to be sensible about protecting the eye I rely on.

So I’m specifically looking for practical, evidence-based advice from people with monocular vision, ophthalmologists/optometrists, or anyone knowledgeable about this.

And also, please tell me: should I pursue Computer Science?

Is there anything specific I should keep in mind regarding eye protection, sports/exercise, everyday activities, university, or spending long hours on a computer?

I’d really appreciate advice from people who have experience with monocular vision, especially those who are studying, working, exercising, or living independently.

And if anyone wants to talk or make a new friend, feel free to DM me. 🙂👍🏻

Hey everyone, I’m 16yo guy from Pakistan, turning 17 next month. For the guys who actually grew taller after 17, what specific routine, diet, or habits etcetra actually worked for you?

I am currently around 5 feet 0 inches

(So depressed, idk how will i grow, i want to grow 8-10 inches)

Hey everyone, I’m 16yo guy from Pakistan, turning 17 next month. For the guys who actually grew taller after 17, what specific routine, diet, or habits etcetra actually worked for you?

I am currently around 5 feet 0 inches

(So depressed, idk how will i grow, i want to grow 8-10 inches)

Is there anyone here who is currently in FSc Pre-Medical (especially 11th/12th) or A-Levels with a biology background and is planning to go into CS/tech instead of medicine?

I'm specifically looking for people who are currently making this transition, not only people who switched after MDCAT.

Just wanna connect with those who are currently in the same boat as me.

Hey guys, please suggest some pakistani dramas that focus on dark or important social issues.

Kindly share your reviews as well and let me know if they are worth watching. Thanks in advance!

Need recommedations..🥲

Need recommedations..🥲

Aoa, if anyone have study material for FinTech for FAST entry test, please share..

Actually i want to improve my sleep-wake up routine, so...share sone tips that worked for you guys or you know...

Actually i want to improve my sleep-wake up routine, so...share sone tips that worked for you guys or you know...

Drive link for FAST NU Test

Whatsapp group for comsats entry test prep '26-27