u/AdrianVeidt19

I'll try to be quick with the backstory. Basically I work with this girl, let's call her Mia. I had a huge crush on her for almost 2 years. I didn't know how to approach her and basically time went by and basically friendzoned myself. About 7-8 months ago situation asked for it and i confessed to her, she kindly rejected me. Even tho my entire world shattered i tried my best to keep it cool, reassured her that it's just a simple crush and there was no need to ruin our friendship and that i was okay. I was basically dead inside and depressed but i think i somehow was able to mask it, seeing her almost every day for hours was a torture but whatever. Now fast forward, 3 months ago new girl arrived at work, I was training her which kinda led us to get close, then I impulsively asked her out and we're dating, nothing serious, no labels but we're not exactly casual. Now this is where things get weird, Mia is very passive aggressive with her and uses every chance to belittle and undermine her on a personal or work reasons, one or two times i had to intervene because she's new and mistakes happen whatever. This is not all, she became more active towards me, texting me, asking out on random activities, sending me memes and reels and being touchy and weird.

Now, honesty time, I'm not over her, the sole reason this entire situation confuses me, some part of me thinks that maybe she realized that she has feelings for me? But much bigger part of me thinks she's being selfish and egocentric. I don't know if i should pursue her and ruin this thing i got going which is very good or not.

Maybe the question is vague, I'll try to explain.. I'm a mix of many things, i have severe social anxiety, a little bit of agoraphobia, body dysmorphia and seriously lack social skills. I'm just genuinely curious what it's like to be just introvert because sometimes i get confused that maybe I'm not an introvert and I'm just fucked up?

I always say 'it is what it is' and just genuinely go on autopilot but it bothers me and it bothers me that it bothers me so much.

Most of my life i was lonely, i always had people around me but no genuine connection. My first ever genuine connection happened a few years ago, when i was in my late twenties, that relationship lasted 2 years and after that my loneliness has become a problem. Not only am I not over the breakup but also suffer from loneliness, what i could have and what i lost, i really didn't know how high you can feel and how much we actually crave it. At any point in my life no matter how bad it was i always had at least one person to talk to and lately, i don't think it ever was this bad as it is now, i literally have no one, not a single person.. sometimes it gets so boring and dry, sometimes something happens ro I'm somewhere and i want to tell or talk to someone and i don't have anyone and it never bothered me and it bothers me and i feel broken and hopeless. I'm not even gonna go into detail about my mental illnesses but there are a lot of factors that are in my way to just go out and make friends, or even try our dating apps and go on dates, i can't do anything and at this point I'm just waiting for it to end.

This is so insane and honestly embarrassing but when i think about it, it all comes to this. Every single time i have to meet a new person or go to a new place for work or something or even when I'm just outside, all i think about is how ugly i am and how that's all they think about. Not just ugly but genuinely unfitting, like a piece of puzzle that doesn't fit anywhere and noticeably out of place. How many opportunities, potential jobs, talking stages and even a relationship I ruined because i can't get out of my head and cannot stop thinking about it. My social anxiety, awkwardness, agoraphobia, depression everything might actually be connected to this and I'm so embarrassed because of this.. my best years are gone because of this and at this point I'm just waiting for everything to just end, i gave up.

Every single multiplayer or single player game(doesn't matter) I play has a smooth, fast and genuinely friendly menu where i can go whenever i want fast, enter modes smoothly, do whatever I want and queue for games with no problem.

FC is a pure torture, why, genuinely why can't they just fix this little thing? Does it have to be? Sometimes I don't do things because of how laggy and awful that entire menu is and quickly trying to play rivals or whatever.

Gameplay has a lot of problems overall but the menu one is so simple why don't they just start with that.

Hello.

I love exploration, taking my time, cosy atmosphere and looking and finding new locations, like I'm some sort of explorer or archeologist. But i really get tired from endless grinding and doing the same thing over and over again, i really hate repetitive gameplay and locations but meaningful diverse and thoughtful quests and I'm all in!

Now imagine this, boys are having a day off and Sarah has a conversation with Nikki, telling her how much she likes Bear and wants to have a relationship with him. Nikki tells him how sweet that is and that Bear is like a little brother to her and that's cool and everything.

Then boom suddenly Nikki and Bear are coming to work together and another boom they're dating, not even dating like literally living together and acting like they love each other. Then another big boom Ian dumps a bombshell on you that apparently they're having sex for 2 years and since Ian doesn't want a serious relationship she might be trying to make him jealous.

Yes, Nikki is acting weird and literally like a completely different character but Sarah is a human being, she's angry and full of emotions, if Nikki is hurt by Ian okay understandable but did she have to go for a guy she told her YESTERDAY about? This is why she doesn't fully care or pay attention to her, she's betrayed and hurt and thinks that Nikki is playing games with both of their male friends and genuinely thinks that Bear will get hurt by this.

Nikki suffered the most throughout the movie but Sarah is extremely realistic, understandable and tragic character.