u/Important_Sorbet

Does anybody know what’s going on here? I can’t find this message that she sent me because it’s like not there. I know that she sent it because the locked screen told me that she sent me a voice message and she’s also telling me that she did leave the voice message, which means she’s confirming that she did, but I can’t find it in voice messages at all. I’ve never really had anything like this before. Could anybody here by chance know what’s going on? Has something like this happened to anyone here before? My sister wants me to see if I can look into the message.

Being single, an outcast, considered too weird, is the story of my life. I have never been in a relationship before.

However, I hear people in the spectrum have had at times succeeded. Such people could really help a lot of people by sharing how they did it.

For twenty years, ever since I was 12, I have been cast out like 95% of the time I’ve tried to socialize. I had to recluse in junior high and high school due to the extremes of bullying, where I was told “You are just way too awkward for sex! No one will ever like you!” I was even told “Why don’t you just die?! Nobody likes you and wants to be your friend!” Stuff like that; a lot of what people go through, but I went through it EVERY SINGLE MOMENT I tried to branch out and meet new people and make new friends. I only found myself being only bullied each time. It got so bad, I ended up having thoughts of suicide that it became too socially dangerous for me to keep trying to branch out, and so I had to recluse. I ended up feeling convinced that no one was ever capable of being mature enough to be accepting of me in any way.

It really has not improved all that much. People now are only willing to be friends with me, but none of them ever care to give me a chance at dating, because I’m different. This is the case, even though I’ve been told I don’t seem autistic. I’ve had girls who had crushes on me say they no longer have crushes on me because of the autism, and they’d say they’d be willing to only be friends. However, even though they can date whoever they want and it’s fine if they reject me, it’s not fine if it be because I have autism which then leads me to say, “If you are going to be myopic by my autism like that even though you had initially had feelings for me, but you don’t anymore all because I have autism, then I feel like that’s really offensive against my being in the spectrum and therefore against me as a person, because even though autism is what I have, it doesn’t define me or limit me! You can go ahead and reject me. That’s fine! But it’s not fine but immature that you would do that all because I have autism, therefore being so myopic towards it! I’m sorry, but I feel disrespected because that’s your attitude towards it even though it didn’t stop you having feelings for me initially. I’m sorry, but your attitude is unfair. Rejecting me alone is what would be fine, but if it’s because I have something that doesn’t limit me like how you are limiting me now by losing interest all for something like that, then no it’s not fine! I don’t think I want to be friends with you!”

A number of people in the past who showed me great respect said, “If someone ever loses interest in you all because you have autism, even if it’s in dating scenarios, that’s not cool! Neither do you want them as friends! They’ll be toxic!”

Great advice and all from them. I however need advice from those who have been relatively been weirder than “a man with glasses, braces, pants up past his belly button, who walks all goofishly and clumsily and sounds like a fox when he laughs” which is what people long ago used to say I’m weirder than. People still shut me out/flake away today, but they don’t name call. The bullying is no longer there as a manifestation of name calling, but as acts of indifference. Indifference is all I receive from people. They don’t really care to talk to me, but will instead make up excuses saying “I think (someone’s name) is calling me over there. I have to go. Bye!” even though they obviously made it up; I’ve had a number of these people later tell me they made up these departure excuses like these. because they no longer wanted to keep hanging around me, nor keep talking to me.

What hurts too is my Mom passed away five years ago, believing that - due to how rude and indifferent people often are towards me when I try to branch out - that no woman would be worthy of me. She said it like “I don’t think any woman will ever be worthy of marrying you, because if they are just going to be so mean to you and sell you short too quickly all because you have autism, then you are too good for them to be worthy of you! And it breaks my heart that they choose to be too self-centered to give you a chance!” My Mom died the next day after saying that! It haunts me!

I have also so much anger and bitterness inside me towards majority of people in the world because of how much bullying I’ve been through in both friendship and dating scenarios! It makes me feel a raging fire burning inside of me, and I want it gone! I don’t want to carry that pain and rage into a relationship with me either! You might laugh, or you might be disturbed, by how my feelings compare my to these songs, but I guess the songs “Abracadavre” by Treyarch, “Come With Me” by Puff Daddy, or even “Circle With Me” by SpiritBox can metaphorically relate to the feelings I have. Maybe even “The Vengeful One” by Disturbed metaphorically relates similarly to how I feel about society. These feelings of bitterness I know I have to get rid of. It’s so hard to do so when constantly experiencing the indifferences of people in almost all social avenues of life: like I said, it’s like 95% of all social opportunities. I have slightly better luck in friendships than dating.

I need advice on how to make things work despite how shut out by people I’ve been, all for being as weird as Buddy off of Elf, Colin Creevey or Luna Lovegood off of Harry Potter, etc. I need to get rid of my rage and bitterness, yes, but I feel like I’m not going to be able to get rid of my social awkwardness. Rage/bitterness? Yes. Social awkwardness? No. I can’t stop being awkward, so people are just going to have to learn how to be mature around me instead of bullying me or being indifferent of me. I don’t agree with them if being indifferent is what they choose to be. Nor do I agree if they say nothing is wrong with being indifferent/ostracizing of others. They can go ahead if they want to, but I do still feel like it’s not a good thing to do or be towards others!

Going back: how do I succeed? I keep my personal feelings to myself in public. I don’t share my feelings with them. I do my best to put on a positive attitude. To be engaging. But they just think I’m awkward. Even if I avoid disclosing my history to them and put in the effort to be positive, they still shut me out.

Those who went through what I went through, but somehow made things work out and got married and even possibly had children in marriage, how did you make it work despite having autism and how myopic others have been towards you because of it? I really need to know! I need an autistic person who can be the “dating guru” or whatever that can teach people how to be successful. I don’t know if that makes sense, but yes I need help. Coaching. Advice.

Just what to eat for each mealtime of the day. Possibly even one for desert, even if it’s apple slices with peanut butter, or any other idea you might have.

Like what is the in-lore explanation behind it? Does Bolse prompt, or give time for, Andross to escape while Area 6 does not, or something? Andross finds out either way that you are coming for him regardless which path you take, so I’m curious as to how one path leads to the decoy while the other leads straight to Andross.

Is it like 50 times, 100 times, 150 times, 200 times, 250 times, 300 times, 350 times, 400 times, 450 times or 500 times? Like for minimum what is it, and for maximum what is it?

I ask because I myself and some others have gotten discouraged after getting rejected 5 to 10 times in a row. I’m wondering though. Are those not number of times of being rejected to get all discouraged about? If not, then what number is? What number does someone give up at?

If the guy is also fat, “not good looking,” or both, then does the number of rejections not matter, and that his appearance actually matters; like would it not matter how many times he asked women out on a date, as in no matter how many times he tries will he always be rejected because of his appearance/looks?

How many times should every man put in the effort before giving up? 100? 200? 300? 400? 500?

I myself have been experiencing some weird things too. The game keeps kicking me off-line where I’m not able to play multiplayer. And if it does connect me online, if I wanted to buy something in the shop, and I buy the credits that I need to buy what I want to buy in the shop, the shop still glitches thinking that I haven’t purchased the credits yet, and is asking me to purchase some more credits thinking that I haven’t purchased the credits yet. But I have, but it’s being stupid treating me like as if I haven’t gotten the credits; what I want to get is 2200 credits and I have 2600 credits, but every time I try to use those 2600 credits to buy the 2200 credit purchase I want, it still tells me to buy some more credits and that I don’t have enough.

I’ve factory reset my Xbox, changed the port selection, got the NAT Type to the Open status, but the game is still being really wonky. Like two or three people have told me that they’ve noticed some things too. And I think they might have mentioned something is wrong on the halo infinite servers end or other. But I’m not really sure what they were saying.

Does anyone reading this have information on that and how long it’s supposed to go for? Whenever I look something up on XBOX and I see the status it just says that it’s been off-line for at least a month, but that doesn’t make sense because I can see that people on here are able to play the game just fine.

Has anyone here able to really shut any light on what’s going on here and how long this is supposed to last? The people I mentioned make it sound like this was a planned occurrence and that it’s supposed to last for a certain amount of time. I’d like to know how much time that is if this was a planned occurrence. I don’t believe for one second that this issue has been going on for a month, regardless of what that thing I saw said on xbox.com. I don’t know, it just doesn’t make sense.