u/toomuchbluememories

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First of all this isn't one of them posts from over performative ppl tryna be different by acting pure..etc lol nah i like sexual stuff too, but i feel like yapping (اصبحنا واصبح الملك لله كعدت ضايج كلت خلسولف)

بشكل عام احس العلاقة مراح تتسمى علاقة لو مجان بيها عركة بالشقة لو مضايقات كلامية بالشقة من الطرفين من حين للاخر

aggressive cuddles, pillow fights, ragebaites.. etc

فضلا عن المساعدة بين بعض بحيث الاثنين يعرفون يقرون الي بداخل شريكهم من مجرد النظر والاستماع

والاهم والي تقريبا اعتبرها فانتزي عندي هو علاقة طبيعية بأهل بعض فمثلا

اني متابع بولندية ع الانستا بعمري من شي اربع سنين بوقتها جانت 15 سنة، هي تشتغل بكافتريا قريبة من بانزين خانة وتعرفت على ولد يشتغل بالماركت مال هل بانزين خانة وتواعدوا، بالبداية جانوا يومية كاضيها ببيوت اهل بعض، يحجون وي اهلهم طبيعي وميحسون انه كاع يسوون شي غلط لازم يخبوه، يصورون، ينشرون وي اهل بعض وهيج تحس محد مجبور ع الصورة بس ذكرى عفوية.. المهم قبل سنة اشوفلهم ستوري انه نجحوا بدفع اول قسط لشقة غرفة ومطبخ وحمام خاصة بيهم وهمه بعد توهم صايرين 18 سنة.. ولو تشوف الاحتفال الي اهل بعض اقاموه الهم.. والحلو بالموضوع بعد سنة كاملة من تحويلتهم لهل شقة وهمه بعدهم بتواصل وي اهلهم طبيعي..

Whenever i enter her account i feel like i wanna cry

العن الساعة الي جيت بيها لهل بلد التعيس، صباح الخير

I don't really want this to seem like a "desperate" vent honestly i don't want it to seem like anything but a question.

am tired.

When i say i want to cause libido am not saying this because am some kind of an unstoppable bull or فحل whatever you call it.

It's not like that. I have read that males have a high sex drive in the morning that decreases as it gets late Everyday. Well this isn't the case for me, my sex drive might seem different or less difficult to deal with compared to others but it's still frustrating.

Idk how to describe it but i get a week or sometimes weeks without having an urge to do anything then comes random days after those weeks where I can't stop thinking about it to the point where even breathing feels like it causes an erection. Now you might say why not masturbate? Well it only helps for afew minutes after i finish then everything comes back to that crazy state where I can't think straight, not to mention the feeling of guilt after masturbating. And if i don't masturbate and force myself not to do it? It just feels like an itch in my damn balls that makes even moving heavy، i couldn't handle this shitty feeling for more than 30 days then folded and done it for temporary relief then it all came back after afew hours of doing it after the cut. And what's even more annoying is that masturbating doesn't feel good anymore it just feels like a task that doing is a must.

I have tried anything, seen many YouTube therapies, yet it never helps, i don't watch porn, i started exercising in those days but it only made it worse. I started to draw, clean the house/cook talk to people online about random ordinary stuff but it never helps.

what's the deal here? I hit puberty at 11 and was never like that and am currently 19 i used to be sane before 17 it all started in these two years.

Is this just because of repression? Will it change after a physical relationship?? What's the current solution to this???

هممم

hmmmmm