u/KaleidoscopeOk5063

I love my family, but I haven’t seen them in the flesh for about 3 years. I live in a different state. I communicate with them regularly via phone - both my immediate family and extended family, but I never really see them anymore.

I’m struggling, like a lot of people right now. I used to be gainfully employed when I was in college, and during this time life wasn’t perfect, but it was much better than what I’m going through now.

I have struggled with steady employment after college. I think this is partially due to poor mental health. My mental health is not great. A lot of the jobs I have had post college were pretty toxic.

As a teenager I was in and out of jail for petty stuff - marijuana, alcohol, stuff like that. I’m not a criminal or anything, but to my dad this was traumatizing. He had to pick me up from jail several times. I regret that this happened but it happened, I can’t change it.

Now our relationship is strained. He has always tried to play the tough love card, but tough love doesn’t work, or it didn’t work with me.

Now I am trying to go back to school and improve my living situation, and thankfully my parents are offering some support, but I don’t really think they understand what is happening with me. And I feel guilty and somewhat handicapped that I am relying on them for support - but there isn’t anything I can do about it.

I just wish my parents and family would understand why my life has unfolded the way that it has and they wouldn’t demonize me for things I can’t change.

I’ve been in and out of therapy since a young age - like 9 or 10. I have depression, I also have addiction issues, mostly with alcohol which is probably the worst addiction. I was bullied at a young age, and I’m not making excuses, but I think it probably permanently fucked me up.

I’m 32 now. For the past few years I have struggled with employment and become dependent on my parents. In my early 20’s this was not the case, I was paying my own way through college by working steadily. That life structure I had built collapsed.

Now i am grasping at life to get back what I once had. But my mental health has really morphed. I was seeing a therapist who specializes in bipolar, because that’s what my parents thought I had. The bipolar specialist says I don’t have bipolar.

The therapy felt like masterbation and it wasn’t helping me at all so I stopped going.

My parents insist that I need therapy. They might be right, but it has never helped me - it gives me a place to vocalize my struggles, but that’s it.

The best therapy I ever had was a steady job, steady income, and friends. But that has disappeared from my life. I probably am dealing with trauma. I have paranoia. I don’t really have anyone I can turn to because my parents treat me like a leper when I ask for help. They try to help me- but they just don’t get what I’m going through.they don’t now how to help

My dad acts like this is all my fault - everything that has happened to me is my fault. He might be correct on some level, but he’s not taking a constructive position. I wasn’t always a loser

I’m a 32m. Admittedly, for the past three years I have not been exercising like I should.

Anyways, I’m not exercising, I’m not having sex, my diet is questionable, I drink beer constantly. I managed to get rid of most of the hard drugs and liquor but still need beer.

I have actually observed my own thoughts spiral from fairly competent to downright wack a doodle and back to competent.

There are some times where I feel crystal clear - my mind is running on all cylinders. And then there are times where I get confused, I get tired, I start spiraling downwards.

I’m 32. I don’t want to live like this. At the same time - every single asshole has their own formula for how to live life. I don’t want to hear it. I’m just trying to find mine

I’ve worked tons of jobs. Restaurants, warehouses, delivery boy, movie industry, tech, education industry, security….

For me, literally the most stressful part of most jobs doesn’t even happen at work, it happens when your are off from work, planning for work. Or thinking about work.

I’m hoping I can find a job that doesn’t make my hair go grey or disappear..

I’ve been in love twice. I don’t think I can do it anymore

My teeth hurt. I’m old.

Ive already been in love before, unfortunately, I don’t see it happening again

I can’t.

I recently got accepted to a good school - it’s expensive. My mother told me “go for it, I know it will cost money”

I don’t think she has any idea how I am processing this. I will need a lot of money, and it’s going to make me feel terrible

She is going to hold this against me. “Jake had to go to a good school….”

Duck

I have struggled with employment - I’ve had great jobs and I’ve had a lot of shitty jobs. The one thing I can say is that when I am employed and making money, I feel much better (usually, unless it’s a shit job)

I got fired yesterday. I could have been doing better work - this is true. I got fired for not producing 100% banger work. I’m not making any excuses about that

I’m back in the trenches. I’m depressed. I have no income, I can’t confidently speak to women anymore. I have no savings.

I’m not just talking about monetary freedom, I’m talking about meaning. The job is something you actually care about and are good at

For me, I have had 3-4 jobs that seemed too good to be true. They paid well and provided me with a ton of freedom - but once I got that level of freedom and money, I inevitably fuck it up. Always

I think it’s because I am so uncomfortable and broke most of the time, that as soon I get any level of security or freedom, I totally fuck off, and I get fired. So the job is still a means to an end - the job is just giving me the lifestyle where I can be comfortable.

But as soon as I get it I can’t seem to control it. I’ll get it again but I’m just tired of going through this process

When I was 25, my life was going in the right direction. I was employed, I was in school, I had a girlfriend. I had the world by the balls - I basically could do anything I wanted.

Now, at 32, I feel helpless. I’m broke. I struggle with employment. My mental health is volatile. I often feel like I can’t do basic things that most people take for granted.

My uncle would say something like “just go get laid”, or “just keep working”. But I literally can’t, I feel emasculated, I have no power or freedom anymore. It’s really painful and scary.

I am starting to think I’m unemployable.

TL,DR: how do you teach kids about dental health

I had braces as a kid. I still have a metal retainer on my bottom teeth. I had dental insurance growing up.

Now, I have no insurance, and I’m pretty sure my teeth will rot if I don’t do something about it

I brushed my teeth everyday, I used listerene, I avoided sugary foods.

I don’t trust dentists, but also I want to keep my teeth. I feel like big dental fed me a lot of malarkey growing up, and now I don’t know who to trust

I have been unemployed, worked in pizzerias, I worked in warehouses, I donated blood, I went to food banks, I took every odd job I could find. For like 5 years.

I felt like a loser. I was just offered a programming job - I didn’t even think they would hire me. I just took the interview because why the hell not.

And now like - shit, I’m employed now? I’m no longer a loser? It’s weird because the past five years has been really rough for me, I don’t know how to act or feel about it

When I am “plugged in” I will be checking emails, programming something, and texting someone, and talking to a friend in the other room.

I have a really hard time with technology because I rely on it to make money, I rely on it for communication, but I kinda feel like it’s botching parts of my life.

I have heard some people do extreme thing like “dopamine fasting”, or psychedelic drugs. I’m leaning towards the psychedelic drugs but I’m not really sure what to do

I sometimes will go days without checking my email - which is bad. But technology is really addicting. I am either checking my email every two hours or not checking it for three days….

Email is just an example, and yea I’m aware of the irony of posting this on Reddit

I work on software. I use the so called “rubber ducky method”. All the time.

I only do it when I’m working on software.

What am I doing….

Sometimes I will have a friend on the phone, or I will have some music or podcast in the background, but that distracts me. When I’m talking to myself - literally - or to an AI - I can be more productive.

I feel crazy

I’ve had a lot of different jobs - I’ve worked in restaurants, film/tv, warehouses, tech, the postal service, hospitals, conservation, education - the list goes on.

Lately I have been focused on software, which is what actually interests me, but sometimes I feel like I can’t even do that. Software is competitive and sometimes the feedback i get is not helpful

My parents think I just don’t have work ethic or something - that not the case at all. I’m completely disillusioned with work and money at this point. I still work - but when you don’t feel like you are doing a good job, the motivation just evaporates

I’m supposed to start a new job at a restaurant soon - I don’t really want to work in a restaurant. But software has been very random for me and I need a steady job - not these random contracts that come and go in software