Even if I had all eternity, I wouldn't choose a life filled with all the trouble, sadness and depression I've faced. Endless bullying, racism, poverty, no love life? Nope, we are not God. We're just humans with no divine powers. Even if I wanted a 'challenge', those would not be the challenges I'd choose.
Even if I had all eternity, I wouldn't choose a life filled with all the trouble, sadness and depression I've faced. Endless bullying, racism, poverty, no love life? Nope, we are not God. We're just humans with no divine powers. Even if I wanted a 'challenge', those would not be the challenges I'd choose.
Salam,
So basically, I have a very narcissistic, toxic older brother. He is extremely controlling to the point where if I stir my coffee too many times or wash my hands too loudly, he will shout at me and even force me to stop. This shocks my nervous system. Imagine living in fear of someone twice your size. I'm a grown-up woman and he will take my phone or laptop off me over the tiniest disagreements for example, last time I told him not to call my mum fat (she's a healthy weight and on a strict diet to the point of under-eating) and his reaction was an angry 'GET OUT THE HOUSE!!' and another time there was a similar incident like this where I didn't do anything wrong but for some reason he was angry again and told me that if I don't get out the house (it was night time and the sky was black) then he won't give me my phone back.
Another thing is we lost our home and got evicted because me and my mum couldn't afford to cover all the bills and rent and he refused to pay his share of the rrent and bills even though he was perfectly capable of donig so. I work part-time and I'm looking for full-time work, trying my hardest. My mum can't work and shouldn't at her age and my narcissistic brother refuses to work even though he's 35. He's NEVER in his lifetime contributed to rent and when I ask him he says stuff like 'Oh you wanna live off my money?' when that's what he's doing to me and my mum the whole time. I want him to stop free-loading and pay his fair share but he's entitled. Right now we're classed as 'homeless' and living in a temporary place and it's tiny. I don't even have my own room.
On top of that, he's sometimes physically abusive too and occasionally harasses me. He's emotionally abusive. He's very argumentative and shouts and screams daily at everyone.
I don't know why Allah hates me so much? I don't know what to do. My dad died over a decade ago. I have no relatives. No connections. my brother makes me want to die. He's a narcissistic bully. I don't understand why Allah doesn't rescue me after literally 1000s of duas for decades? What's going on? I don''t understand. Because God doesn't help me, it's made life feel meaningless to me like I'm alone and Allah doesn't care
I'm not gay but I'm curious about why it's possible for men to get feelings for men. I watched that new Sam Smith music video 'My Guy' and this vid actually portrayed love not lust which surprised me. The way the guy affectionately touched his hand reminds me of when I as a woman had crushes on men. It's like the same thing...
I want answers from Christians and Muslims please
btw I'm still religious but...yeah
Bonus Question: Did you previously eat too much because of family problems?
How do you deal with people like him? He's 35 and doesn't work, me (adult female) and my mum pay all the bills and he still bullies us and is extremely controlling and abusive. I can't leave because I work part-time and searching for full-time work so I'm financially stuck. My mum doesn't want to kick him out because then he'll be on the streets and she cares about him. I absolutely hate him. Living with him is hell.
As soon as I have enough money to safely leave and live alone, I will. But that could take YEARS. Any advice?
Yeah like all those spots after your binging and stuff buddy...
So there were these yellow 'hard drive-like things'- not quite hard drives, but I knew I had to carry them. I walk out of this corridor into an open area and immediately it feels wrong.
My task is to put them into buckets filled with water.
If I don’t, these zombie-like creatures will emerge and kill me.
It’s HORRIFYING because I can already feel them getting closer. Not seeing them properly, but I know they’re there. Behind me. Everywhere. And I’m not even allowed to walk normally on the floor...I have to climb on shelves just to move around, still grabbing these things and dropping them into water.
heart beats faster
I’m rushing between shelves and buckets, trying to keep up, trying not to think about what’s coming closer.
Somehow I managed to do it!
And they’re RIGHT behind me now...I never see them properly, but I can feel them- like this dark, intelligent, psychopathic presence just waiting. So close.
Then I walk into this room with a massive window- like the whole wall is glass.
And I finally see one.
It’s HUGE. Strong. Intelligent. Brutally sadistic. You can feel it instantly just by looking at it.
Through the window, it’s torturing/killing someone who didn’t make it...
Me and this other guy just freeze. We look at each other. No words. Just this shared feeling of sadness and shock :(
He leaves- like he wants to do something, maybe help him...
But I can hear the other man screaming… helpless. And there’s this tone in his voice like he’s been completely abandoned. Like he can’t believe everyone just left him there with it.
When I woke up, I could still hear that tone in my head.
I felt so distressed because I couldn’t help him
It felt like I had just left a different dimension of reality.
I’m in my early 30s, female, and lonely as can be. The people at work are ageist toward me because I don’t look like I’m in my 20s anymore. They tend to value more popular people.
I’m a minority, so I feel anxious about joining any meetups outside of work because of racism. If you tell me, “Oh, make friends with your own people,” there’s often so much racism between minorities too, especially when you’re mixed white and brown and don’t really fit in on either side. Honestly, I feel distressed.
What pops to mind?
For example, a random piece of paper falls in front of your house. Or a random dog starts barking really loud and it's not like a sign of anything that's gonna happen next, it just happens.
Edit:
Perhaps the stuff I mentioned is just supposed to be part of the animated scenery
I use semi-permanent dye because I want options but it's so annoying that it fades in like 4-6 weeks and starts looking dull. When it looks dull, it makes me look older.
I’m female and 5'3". When I was a teenager and in my 20s, I was overweight—about 11.5 stone (around 73 kg) at 16, and roughly 10 stone (about 64 kg) through most of my 20s. At one point I went up to around 11 stone before coming back down again. By 29, I was around 9 stone (about 57 kg). Even so, I often felt that men saw me as too overweight earlier on, and later, when I had lost weight, I was sometimes told I was “too old” instead.
I’m now 31 and weigh about 9 stone 4 lbs (around 59 kg). My weight loss has been a long and very difficult journey. Being overweight was especially hard for me because I also have ADHD, which made consistency, impulse control, and managing emotional eating much more challenging. I often struggled with emotional eating as a way of coping with a lot of stress, including a difficult family environment, racism, and social exclusion. It didn’t feel like a simple matter of “just eating less”—it felt tied to regulation, routine, and overwhelm, which are all harder with ADHD.
Even though I’m close to my goal weight, I sometimes feel that other women who are slightly heavier are seen as more conventionally attractive, while I still don’t feel I fit those standards myself. I don’t have features like a small nose or full lips, and I often feel like my natural look doesn’t align with what is typically idealised. The men who do show interest can sometimes be disrespectful, and I’ve experienced age-related and racialised comments at times, including attitudes that seem to centre whiteness as the beauty standard, even from some men who are not white.
I try to stay natural, and I feel uncomfortable with procedures like fillers because of the risks and ongoing cost. I’ve been thinking about whether something like a nose job could change how I’m perceived, but I feel conflicted about that too.
At times I catch myself wondering things like: am I just “doomed” in some way? I feel like I lost a lot of time being overweight in my younger years, and now I’m older after putting in all that effort to lose the weight. I also worry that even if I had been slim in my 20s, I might still have been overlooked for not fitting certain beauty standards. It leaves me questioning whether the “solution” was ever cosmetic surgery all along, or whether I’m just trying to make sense of experiences that have felt unfair and confusing.
One of my earliest jobs was as a cleaner, which I did for around two years. I decided to leave it off my CV after three years of getting no job offers. Now, six months later, I still haven’t had any job offers. Should I add the cleaning work back to my CV? I was worried that it might make employers see me as lower status, as I’m currently in a step up role in fast food, which is still low status but generally seen as a little higher. I noticed in previous jobs that managers treated me with extra arrogance, and I think it was because they knew I had been a janitor, since one of the hiring managers was also the shop floor manager.
CV-Library, Reed and Monster are totally useless as they never get back to you. After applying for years, I don't even consider them functioning job sites anymore. Indeed got me jobs in the past but hasn't in the last years, but I feel like I could find one on there again eventually. Applying on company sites has been the best way to get a job so far.
Sometimes i feel like reporting him but I don't because 1. My mum would be super sad and I don't want to make her sad- her life has already been pretty hard. 2. I fear retaliation
It's naturally dark brown...
I mean I prefer pets but the only issue is, they die too fast and need vet visits.
So why do most people want kids? What's so amazing?