u/AliceMorgon

I’m also including a Freddo bar (classic Belfast chocolate treat). One of both at every place setting. These crisps are only available in Ireland, apparently sell at only a few bars in Boston for $15 a bag, and are THAT good. The first time my MOH’s son tried one, his eyes widened so much I thought they were about to pop out his wee head and he looked like he’d just… ahem… “discovered” himself 🤣

Plus, I figure guests are bound to get snacky during the course of the evening, despite the full dinner, and I don’t want anyone to get hungry!

OK. First, the story of Mad Grandma.

During WWII, silk was all requisitioned for British parachutes, including from the North of Ireland, and my slightly eccentric grandma was walking through her family’s fields and encountered a crashed German pilot struggling to get out of his parachute while being harassed by curious sheep. He aimed his gun at her, so she shot him. And promptly stole his silk parachute.

When she made her wedding dress out of it, she attached all kinds of crazy Irish folklore s___e/her own weird s___e to it including about a dozen TAXIDERMIED DOVES. That, yes, she also went out and both shot AND taxidermied herself. It has now been given to me for my US wedding. The dress is a complete madness of dead birds, occasional spots of German blood which is at least MOSTLY hidden under lace she made herself, and many other weird, inexplicable things. Yes, I have added a picture.

TL;DR: Grandma shot a Nazi, made a dress out of his parachute, then attached a bunch of birds and stuff to it.

Anyway, when I first started looking at veils I got the squicks big time. I had no idea why because I definitely didn’t have cold feet. Then I realised it was because I wasn’t being me, and am attaching an awesome one to my Joan Jett hair with a big black velvet bow. I have also added a picture of the veil, the bow, and my usual look, which I’ll be sticking with for the wedding.

However, the veil is very long, so I’m taking it off for the reception. I’m considering replacing the bow with some kind of bird headpiece to go with the birds on the dress (yes, I’m just going to take it and run with it at this point.)

Opinions:

MOH: I like the one with red and black roses.

Bridesmaid 1: WTF NO BIRDS ON YOUR HEAD WHY

Bridesmaid 2: Why would you wear makeup like that let alone with something black for a wedding? At least wear a white bow… (did not comment on birds)

Bridesmaid 3: You’re pretty clumsy, what if you smack someone in the face with a bird fascinator?

What do you guys think?

This is my dress, and it only cost £500! Proper designer couture a friend’s sister ordered from a bridal salon in London, tried on once to check it fit (wonders of being able to afford custom-measured) and then her wedding was called off a week before (it’ll become clear why in a second.) While I was at said friend’s house the next day, her sister said something along the lines of “I saw a really good deal on an EasyJet package holiday to Malaga today. If you pay for me to take my FAVOURITE boyfriend (who she’d been seeing for eight months at that point, and had six others too) you can have my dress.”

Fine by me! And it’s AMAZING. There is so much underpinning inside and the detail is absolutely incredible. You cannot even tell Francesca (my seamstress) has put a panel in to expand the bust because she actually recreated all the hand-sewn lace and sequins herself.

So:

Ian Stuart dress, BNWT, worn once for about two minutes: £500

Alterations, involving taking the waist in three inches, expanding the bust from standard bridal B to a J, and narrowing the back: £200

I think that’s pretty darn good!

The single red roses are to practice making my sword bouquet because I’ve never made one before, but the rest of the bag is full of lovely fake moss-style greenery, fake ivy, and some 3m chains of red roses/white roses! They look great! I’m going to try out arranging them on my trellis outside and if they look really good, I’ll go back and stock up!

I have seven boxes of Cards Against Humanity, one for each table as badass icebreakers. RRP new is something over £40. I bought mine second-hand, mint condition and complete, for various prices from different sellers but all under £10! Thee will also be two Twister mats for when the whisky REALLY kicks in (I’m thinking maybe a trip to Costco or something to stock up, this innocent Midwestern hotel is suddenly going to be swamped with Fenians who’ll drink the place dry in an hour maximum) and a corner with some cool books and board games for people who want to chill rather than dance.

My fiancé’s family are all absolutely fascinated by Ireland and this magical land I’m “rescuing” him to with universal healthcare and government-subsidised university education that only costs £5k a year 🤣 I saw this game in Oxfam, brand new, knew for sure they’d get a kick out of it, and it was £5! I also have second-hand complete sets of other games too (although the Twister mats will be new because God knows who did what on them 🤢) and a selection of short, cool books that were about £2 each from the local used bookshop.

Also… of course we’re doing “Rock the Boat” 🤣

I have seven boxes of Cards Against Humanity, one for each table as badass icebreakers. RRP new is something over £40. I bought mine second-hand, mint condition and complete, for various prices from different sellers but all under £10! Thee will also be two Twister mats for when the whisky REALLY kicks in (I’m thinking maybe a trip to Costco or something to stock up, this innocent Midwestern hotel is suddenly going to be swamped with Fenians who’ll drink the place dry in an hour maximum) and a corner with some cool books and board games for people who want to chill rather than dance.

My fiancé’s family are all absolutely fascinated by Ireland and this magical land I’m “rescuing” him to with universal healthcare and government-subsidised university education that only costs £5k a year 🤣 I saw this game in Oxfam, brand new, knew for sure they’d get a kick out of it, and it was £5! I also have second-hand complete sets of other games too (although the Twister mats will be new because God knows who did what on them 🤢) and a selection of short, cool books that were about £2 each from the local used bookshop.

Also… of course we’re doing “Rock the Boat” 🤣

I have seven boxes of Cards Against Humanity, one for each table as badass icebreakers. RRP new is something over £40. I bought mine second-hand, mint condition and complete, for various prices from different sellers but all under £10! Thee will also be two Twister mats for when the whisky REALLY kicks in (I’m thinking maybe a trip to Costco or something to stock up, this innocent Midwestern hotel is suddenly going to be swamped with Fenians who’ll drink the place dry in an hour maximum) and a corner with some cool books and board games for people who want to chill rather than dance.

My fiancé’s family are all absolutely fascinated by Ireland and this magical land I’m “rescuing” him to with universal healthcare and government-subsidised university education that only costs £5k a year 🤣 I saw this game in Oxfam, brand new, knew for sure they’d get a kick out of it, and it was £5! I also have second-hand complete sets of other games too (although the Twister mats will be new because God knows who did what on them 🤢) and a selection of short, cool books that were about £2 each from the local used bookshop.

Also… of course we’re doing “Rock the Boat” 🤣

I have no idea why changing the song to this one didn’t occur to me before 🤣

It’s late in the day but I’ve just had my flight changed and now have an 11 hour layover in Boston. No way will I sit in an airport that long. I’m from Ireland and really interested to see cool parts of the city because there’s such a huge diaspora there, including a ton of distant relatives I’ve never met. The last time I was there it was only to pass through on my way to Cambridge so it doesn’t count.

Can anyone suggest fun places to go that aren’t just tourist traps? Or is anyone crazy enough to want to hang out for an hour in the afternoon in the pub with a random redhead from Ireland for a gossip? I can teach you how to cuss in Irish! 🤣

The keychain is on my bag and I wore all the bracelets on my right wrist to the Citi Field show! They made awesome accessories! (Especially the one with the name of my recently deceased cat Lilith on it, it meant a lot to me. I’m going to try and not fail too badly at making one with my other cat Angelina who died in early June’s name on it now, because I’m definitely wearing these at what is essentially turning into an MCR wedding at this point!)

(And then right after this photo was taken I fell over because I refused to let my walking stick into the shot out of pride 🤣)

I’ve been trying to sort this from 3000 miles away across 5 time zones and he is refusing to cooperate at all and just keeps going on about his problems. I have got to the point of finding another sitter, saying I’ll have a taxi outside to take my cat to them, and he just has to put him in his carrier. Apparently I refuse to understand and only care about my cat when I don’t want him left alone for 10 DAYS.

He is currently refusing to go back. If I get someone in the UK to call the police for me, will they break in to rescue my cat and take him somewhere safe? My other local friends (if you can call him a friend) are on a girls’ holiday in Bundoran right now.

ETA: I am located in Belfast in the New Lodge.

UPDATE: A lovely lady from Larne (I forgive the city for cursing me with the habit of using the word “thon” which causes endless hilarity outside Ireland) is going to go and rescue my baby tomorrow at 4! Catsitter still lying to both of us, still whining and bitching at me. Screw him. PSNI are going to go say hi as soon as I get back.

I will update again once he is definitely with his new (temporary, mama still loves him) person!

UPDATE 2: It won’t let me post the photo she sent which is a shame because it’s adorable, but the lovely lady from Larne has my cat and he should be en route to Bangor! (I’ll put the photo in the comments, it’s too cute to miss!)

UPDATE 3: Dodo is safely in Bangor and I can (hopefully) finally calm down a bit and ditch all the frantic panic. Lovely Lady of Larne is Reddit Heroine of the Day (unless someone jumps into a swollen river to rescue a school bus of kids mid-posting later, then it might be Reddit Cat Heroine 🤣

Thank you, everyone who gave advice and reassurance, these past days have been hideous.

Not thank you to the person who accused me of scamming despite asking for nothing but advice and then refused to delete the libellous comment as promised when I refuted all her points, or to the person who admitted she wasn’t familiar with relevant anything having not read any comments but yeah this should so go to the top instead of the woman offering to actually RESCUE my cat - maybe one of you two and Patrick might hit it off?

The PSNI have now been informed, I’ve sent over all my screenshots and got Patrick to admit in text that he did agree to care for the cat and yes did have the keys and yes had left him and yes wouldn’t hand them over. But apparently “My God will protect me” so that’s fine. My God personally doesn’t care for animal abuse, lies, or psychological abuse and manipulation, but maybe his is different. We’re both Catholic, though, so that’d DEFINITELY be the fart heard round the world if that turned out to be true 🤣

UPDATE 4: Dodo has fallen head over heels for the Catsitter and is happy as a clam, I feel much better now 👍🏻 I’ll post a reply with photos in the comments if I can to the Lovely Lady of Larne!