u/Horrobla

Newly married and I still feel like I’m getting used to sleeping next to someone. I end up feeling too lazy to keep up with my personal care like nails, eyebrows etc when I would keep on top of it when I lived at home.

It isn’t helping that we are staying at my father in laws house while we sort out our house. It just feels like being on a trip without home comforts and getting by on the bare minimum. I don’t wake up early to get ready like I used to, I just get up when he does and rush to get ready for work. I just feel so icky sometimes.

How do you make time for yourself?

Edit; we’re 27 and 28. Been together just under 2 years.

Some days, I’ll feel like my hair is doomed to be a mess from wash day until the next, my skin feels icky like I need to shower, my face feels like it needs a good exfoliation etc etc.

It doesn’t help I’m essentially living in a box room with the bare essentials at my father in laws house until we have our own place sorted so it just feels like being on a trip without home comforts.

We’re due to be away this weekend and I’m trying to figure out when best to wash my hair, do my eyebrows etc while planning this around plans me and the husband have to visit his mum for dinner, maybe go to my mums, etc etc. it’s also easy to just be lazy with him. I’ve been sleeping in recently while in the past I would be up at like 6 and would start getting ready for the day so id feel good all day rather than rush to get ready like I do now.

Any tips to help?

We are putting a 10% deposit on a £232.5k house, and I am thinking to go with 2 years at 5.16%, 5 years would be 5.37%, only knowing we have funds to overpay with. The only reason we’ve kept the deposit low is to have some money to renovate with. We are intending to overpay both monthly and before remortgaging.

I know things don’t always go to plan and we might not having money spare to overpay with, but my parents will be able to gift me something around 30k so I am hoping to use that towards it.

What would you do?

I don’t drink often and I’m a lightweight so it gets me very quickly. I enjoy most of my evening until the end of the night where my partners helping me, but I get overly emotional and cry about not being good enough, too far, etc etc and it’s obviously not fun for him. How do I not do this but still enjoy drinking whilst out?

I don’t want to overpack but also don’t want to be refused entry to bars and stuff. Will be visiting my partners friends who live in Chelmsford but will be exploring as much of central London as possible so I will be packing trainers to talk in. I know it’ll be warm so plan on packing summer clothes, it’s just the dress code for certain places. I don’t know exactly what places we’ll visit or I’d check, just need tips on what to wear so it’s fine for any place or activity we do. 27f if it helps.

Thanks in advance.

Reading through the requirements and the managerial elements put me off. I don’t know if it’s for me to do something like that.

I haven’t really spoken to my manager but I’ve had 7 years here, passed all my exams and the EPSM module.
I’ll see if she’s free and can look through with me at some point. I don’t know how to go about any of it. No one here is on the ACCA members register but I know shes passed her exams and stuff, so has the finance director, just not paid membership I assume.

I do love my partner but having grown up in a household where my dad paid next to nothing and the financial burden was on my mum, I learnt to save from a young age. I have 90k in savings while my husband has 15k.

Now that we’re buying our own house, things feel weird for me. He has enough for the deposit and I have been paying the solicitors and mortgage fees etc.. He and I earn the same amount (2.1k a month) but his can increase with overtime. He also has a car pays monthly £600 for and I have one that I only pay for fuel in as it’s an old 2008 car that’s probably worth 1k if that. I appreciate I benefit from him having that car but it is a coinsink.

He has enough for half the deposit and I’ll match it, but when it comes to furnishing the house, renovations etc, I will be footing all of it. His family will be doing it for us so it’ll be cheap but still.

How do I get rid of the fear of being financially abused? Or being left with nothing? He would never do it to me but i also use my savings as a security blanket.

We’ve agreed to pay in 50% of our wages to the joint for the house bills and I’m hoping this will build enough savings to do stuff for the house and everything else.

Was reversing into a spot and he sped right up behind me, beeped while refusing to move. Eventually did snd shook his head and said something along the lines of makes sense - I’m a female and in my partners bmw so that’s all I can assume he meant. It was a Howdens car, I cant remember the reg but I know he down the road as it’s usually parked there.

I guess it was just embarrassing because there was a truck parked the other side and they all came out the car to go to the shops and decided to watch and laugh with him like I was in the wrong.

Do I report it or just get over it?

I know it’ll make me sound horrible but I’m recently married but I find myself thinking of the last guy I dated before my now husband - it was only for a month but he was head over heels for me and obsessed in a way my husband isn’t. I know it’ll make me wouldn’t have been healthy but more attention from my current partner woild be nice sometimes.

Me(27f) and my husband (28m) recently got married and are looking at buy a house together. I have about £95k in savings (£5k LISA, not yet topped up and reaching 12 months in July so I hope to use this on the house and I’ll top up this years 4k before then, £57k in an ISA, and the rest in a savings account waiting to be moved into an ISA or used as a house deposit) while he has £15k in a LISA.

We earn around £2.1k a month each and his can fluctuate with overtime as he is paid hourly.

We have been looking at houses within our means and are trying to go 50/50 on the deposit and I’ll cover the extra fees like solicitors and whatever else.

Is it worth paying a higher deposit? Or do I keep the savings? We plan on having a child in the next year or so, and id want the savings to soften the financial blow of having childcare expenses.

My family are also happy to contribute financially while his aren’t, though his family will be able to help with the house stuff like electrics, kitchen fittings etc.

I don’t know if we should spend more on a bigger house with my paying more or keep it cheap and hold onto the savings.

We’re looking at houses under the £250k price point so hoping to get a bargain and move down the line if need be.

It wasn’t the right time as me and my partner are still finding a place to live and he agrees we try it again properly in a years time but hearing a coworker is pregnant bought back feelings of regret and what ifs. Anyone else?

I’ve grown up without sisters and not many female friendships - I’ll go over and there’s a bit of chit chat but it just feels so awkward and nothings changed in the last 3 years. They’re pretty much unemployed and spend time at home and with each other since there’s 3 of them so they’re initially hard to talk to too.

It would be nice to be able to have girly chats with them or just talk like friends in general - how do I do this?

I only ever hang out with my husband and his friends now. I rarely have any other plans. I tag along on his plans but do realise they want just a guys day out so end up left alone at home when he has plans. Anyone else been able to make friends in their 20s?

I wish I had girls to hang out with but it’s just never been a thing snd now married, I don’t really socialise unless it’s with my husband or his friends. I’ll go out with them but I don’t really socialise realise they don’t really want me there (which I totally get) so I’ll be home alone on days he has planned something with them.

The only friend i do have tends to cancel plans often and lives a city away so it’s difficult to plan anything.