u/OctopusIntellect

I am in the 10th grade of high school in America. And this phone rule is so crazy law enforcement got called on a child for calling his parent when he was throwing up, Is this the same for yalls schools? If so this is absolutely crazy.

Just dump your opinions! Any grade is okay!

You want to know how teachers manipulate and stay in the role of authority?

“I’m the teacher. End of discussion.” → Appeal to Authority.
Using position instead of actually answering the argument.

“It’s not what you said, it’s your tone.” → Tone Policing.
Ignoring your point and making your delivery the new problem.

“Everyone else manages to follow the rules.” → Social Pressure / Bandwagoning / Triangualtion.
Using the group to make disagreement look abnormal.

“After everything this school does for you…” → Guilt-Tripping.
Turning disagreement into guilt or ingratitude.

Teacher embarrasses you, you get angry, then your anger becomes the issue. → Provocation + Reaction Framing.
The original behavior disappears and your reaction becomes the entire story.

“We’re actually very concerned about your attitude.” → Concern Framing.
Turning criticism of authority into a supposed concern about you.

“We’ve noticed a pattern.” But nobody gives dates, examples or specifics. → Vague Accusation / Kafka Trap.
You’re expected to defend yourself against something that was never clearly defined.

“Why do you always have problems with authority?” → Pathologizing Dissent.
Turning disagreement with a decision into a flaw in your personality.

“You need to reflect on your own role in this.” Repeated until you accept their version. → Coerced Self-Blame.
“Reflection” becomes pressure to confess.

You follow the instruction. Suddenly there’s another requirement. → Moving the Goalposts.
The standard changes after you meet it.

Speak up = disrespectful. Stay quiet = uncooperative. → Double Bind.
Every possible response can be used against you.

“That never happened like that.” Even when multiple people remember it clearly. → Reality Denial / Gaslighting-Type Behavior.
Trying to make you doubt your own account instead of resolving the facts.

Teacher makes a mistake, student points it out, teacher attacks the student’s behavior. → Deflection.
Moving attention away from the original issue.

“You’re making me feel unsafe/disrespected right now.” after you criticize what THEY did. → DARVO-Type Reversal.
The person being challenged suddenly presents themselves as the victim.

“Your parents will be hearing about this.” Used before any real conversation has happened. → Triangulation.
Bringing a third person into the conflict to increase pressure.

Teacher tells other teachers you’re “difficult.” Then every future interaction gets interpreted through that label. → Pre-Framing / Poisoning the Well.
Your reputation reaches the room before you do.

One student misbehaves, the entire class loses something. → Collective Punishment.
Using peer pressure to make the group police the individual.

“Apologize.” “But I don’t agree that I—” “APOLOGIZE.” → Coerced Apology / Forced Compliance.
The goal isn’t understanding. It’s submission.

“You can explain yourself.” You explain. “That sounds like making excuses.” → No-Win Framing.
You are invited to speak, but your answer is invalidated automatically.

Teacher raises their voice. Student raises theirs back. “You do NOT speak to me like that.” → Double Standard.
Authority gives itself behavior it forbids from you.

“This meeting is just to help you.” Then five adults are sitting across from one student taking notes. → Power Asymmetry / Bureaucratic Intimidation.
Pressure created by numbers, titles and documentation.

“We just want you to take accountability.” Meaning: agree with our interpretation. → Compliance Reframed as Accountability.

“You’re very defensive.” after you correct something false about yourself. → Defense Pathologizing.
Defending yourself gets treated as proof that something is wrong with you.

Teacher breaks their own rule, then says: “That’s different.” → Special Pleading.
Rules for you. Exceptions for authority.

“If you have nothing to hide, why are you upset?” → Catch-22 / Kafka Trap
Your attempt to defend yourself becomes “evidence” against you.

A tiny classroom incident becomes: teacher → mentor → coordinator → parents → file note → meeting → Institutional Escalation.
A small disagreement gains power every time another authority layer is added.

“Respect goes both ways.” Until the student expects it to actually go both ways. → Asymmetric Respect.
“Respect” quietly means obedience downward and immunity upward.

Learn the names.

Because once you can name a tactic, they lose power.

my school recently banned ALL students from going to starbucks after school, just because there were some kids that were being rude (can i swear here genq)

why do I MYSELF have to get banned from going and hanging w my friends, because some kids assaulted US??? we should be banning THOSE kids not the ENTIRE SCHOOL

Not allowing kids to vote is obvious, but a thought crossed my mind (won't pretend it's original or groundbreaking or whatever) that old people might not be a good voting base either. 

The arguments for it are the same as in politicians' case. Older people will always overwhelmingly support the status quo, for example keeping housing prices high to support the savings they've amassed, to the detriment of the young and the future of their country, not to mention the usual mental issues that come with old age.

Limiting the age of politicians is a thought being floated around a lot lately, but I haven't noticed anyone talking about the people, who vote for them. So I'm trying to see what smarter people have already thought about it.

My son just turned 11. He has this app, Polybuzz or Polychat I think it’s called where there has been sexual/inappropriate AI storyline chats. Not only that, he is chatting as if he is a “gay femboy” - I think this was in the clipboard of his texts a prompt he uses to start the conversations. I also saw a text message where he said he was pansexual. I was working so I didn’t do a lot of digging because there is a LOT to unpack here. This is the 2nd time I’ve seen the polychat thing and I told my son that school will be starting soon and there’s some concerning apps I’ve been told about by other parents so we’d start doing phone check soon. I was trying to be subtle. But he didn’t get rid of the app and is still engaging in inappropriate discussions via text. Idk who he is texting! It appears to be another kid from Roblox. The messages I’ve seen my son is the one instigating the inappropriate behavior.

1. What do I do?
2. He does not appear this way outwards to us at all, but not like super boy-ish to compensate. He’s a gamer. And I think that’s where he gets exposed to this thinking.
3. I think he’s too young to fully believe that he thinks of himself as a “gay femboy” - as in he’s too young to maybe know? But either way I mean we are accepting of others lifestyles etc. however I wouldn’t encourage it especially at this age, but I’m also afraid to explicitly discourage it.
4. If I make him delete the AI and have a real talk with him about engaging in and understanding the “chats” he is having, would that be like maybe worse or maybe he would turn to Reddit discord etc to engage in this behavior?

Update:
I posted this in hopes that some other parent has experienced the something similar when MONITORING their children’s online devices, but it appears I am the only parent who failed to ensure my children’s online devices is never exposed to any sexual or inappropriate content online. Glad that you all are successful parents.
For those telling me to guide him or detox him from the internet, that is what I’m looking for advice on how to do. As it was said in one comment, our generation should know the internet is not safe. No shit. That’s why I MONITOR the phone. I know wtf I was doing at his age and probably younger online, nobody had discussions with me about internet safety, consent, etc.

Oh and for those telling me to parent my child, get my house in order: I wasn’t raised right. I wasn’t parented. My parents were addicts. I’m learning as I go while also working 2 jobs to support us. But I know I f’d up. However, I came here for support but clearly this is not the place for that, so it looks like this will have to be a YouTube lesson/therapy session. I was just hoping I’d connect with some parents who have gone through a difficult situation like this. Happy to hear none of you ever will!

welcome to Oxford

I never wanted my 11-year-old to have social media. I’ve done everything I could through Screen Time to prevent them from downloading social media or inappropriate apps…or at least I *thought* I had.

Yesterday, I went through my child’s iPad and found screenshots that looked like they came from a comment section. I noticed my child’s screen name (which, unfortunately, was their actual name) and immediately went down a rabbit hole trying to figure out where it came from.

Turns out **CapCut**, which I always thought of as just a video/photo editing app, has what appears to be an almost hidden social media component.

I started looking through it and was honestly shocked. I didn’t see adults…almost everyone appeared to be kids, and based on what I could tell, many seemed to be around 10–14 years old. After seeing what was being posted, I’m starting to wonder if this is where some kids who aren’t allowed to have social media are going because their parents don’t realize CapCut has this feature.

And some of the things I saw were **wildly inappropriate**. Things I honestly don’t even feel comfortable repeating here.
If your child has CapCut on their iPad/iPhone, I would strongly recommend checking it out yourself. Go into the **“Me”** section in the bottom right and see what’s there. I had absolutely no idea this existed.

I’m honestly disgusted and furious that this is apparently happening on an app I thought was simply an editing tool. I’m seriously considering contacting CapCut directly to ask whether they’re aware of what’s happening in that section and what they’re doing about it.

**Parents, please check your kids’ CapCut accounts.** I genuinely had no idea.

UPDATE: How to find out if your kid has an account: click the “me” section, and then enter your child’s phone number or email. if they have an account, it’ll send a verification code to their phone or email. using that verification code will allow you to log in. from there you’ll be able to see if they have a profile or not.

UPDATE #2: I found a way to remove the App Store and Safari from their home screen entirely. If they want to download an app we will have to do it together. Thanks for all the helpful comments and to all the teenagers out there who were trolling in my comments, you’ll understand how I feel when you have kids. Just wait and see.

UPDATE # 3: How to remove Safari and the App store: Screentime > Content & Privacy Restrictions > Allowed Apps & Features. From there, you can toggle off whatever apps you want including the camera.

I live in the WORST town possible, there are 0 skate parks, and it's illegal(where I live) to ride on public roads (I still skate anyway because the police don't enforce any laws where I live)

but lately I've been finding it difficult to skate due to the amount of friction I've been getting from locals. Anytime I go out I either get kicked out from where I'm skating at, shouted at by Karens, threatened with the police being called on me, or attacked by bums(one time a homeless man ran after me with a pole but thankfully I managed to get away from him on my board).

Is there anything I can do to decrease the frequency of these horrible encounters?

(I would love to skate at a skate park in another town, but my parents won't drive me there)

Throwback in 3rd-4th grade I went to school but I wasn't speaking any of my native language.. I WAS SPEAKING ENGLISH

Do I need to change

But how..?

" Just speak your native language" But I can't

" Just learn " BUT EVERYONE IN MY CLASS HATES ME

Hi everyone, since quite soon after this subreddit (AskTeenBoys2) was created, we've linked to r/Puberty in our sidebar.

My reason for this was that the Puberty subreddit answers a lot of questions that teen boys want answers to, is actively moderated, has good safety advice and safety policies, and always quickly gets answers, many of which are good and accurate answers. (It's a ridiculously popular subreddit, which is why it gets answers so quickly.)

If you've looked at that subreddit before, how do you feel about it? Is there something odd about there being sooooo many people that just keep asking the same questions? (Often very new accounts or very low karma.) Or is that just normal that teenagers find out about Reddit and have questions they want answers to?

Have you posted there and got good answers? Or bad answers? Or posted there and got weird DMs?

(Come to think of it, have you posted *here* and got weird DMs?)

btw I believe the Puberty subreddit recommends that you turn off DMs *before* posting there.