u/Pure_Perception6136

i know this is easier said than done, but obsessiveness can be a strength. it can be turned into talent through art, excersize, self-growth, etc.

have i been doing this? not really. but that’s not the point.

i have an apple body shape and i LOVE running. i have inattentive adhd so its perfect for me. it genuinely changes my mood and makes me so much happier and more productive. one day i plan to run a marathon with my father.

i also do like lifting weights, specifically lower body, because it also helps my running strength.

my question is, is the purpose of cardio to burn calories, or can it target belly fat specifically? or is it just the fact that when you burn calories in a deficit, you will naturally lose weight everywhere?

my stomach has always been the last to go.

Yesterday he took me to a spot and pulled chapstick out and asked if i wanted some and then I said sure and then he pulled gum out and asked if I wanted some. But he never tried to kiss me. What are the chances he got too nervous and what are the chances my breath just stank?

Limerance is genuinely a constant hell hole of worrying for someone that you don’t even want. I suspected my male friend had a crush on me earlier in the year and I didn’t reciprocate, although I did find him objectively attractive. But now it’s clear he’s lost feelings and I’m DEVASTATED 😭 These past two months i’ve been spiraling and spiraling because i don’t even know if he liked me but if he did i’m worried it’s too late, even though i know the truth, which is that if we were to date i’d lose my limerance and just find another person to obsess over. I’m a terrible terrible person and I want a relationship so bad but I feel like my brain is just too broken 💔

We want what we can’t have. And when we have it, we don’t want it anymore.

My college boyfriend lives in AZ and I’m in NY. We started dating last semester and he’s expressed to me his deep displeasure for texting. He prefers phone calls or talking in person. He also doesn’t have social media and tries not to use the internet for the most part. (I know, I’m lucky)

The thing is this summer he’s been terrible at responding. He’ll text me when something reminds him of me but then won’t respond to my response. I’m not excepting him to text me every day, but I can’t help but worry when he doesn’t reply. What if he’s texting other girls? What if he’s losing interest?

He’s planning on visiting me in a month, so I feel like that should be enough reassurance that he is committed.

But is it a red flag, or is it just considered a red flag in this online dominated generation?

Bruh this girl has expressed her hatred for texting but I still don’t understand why she proceeds to text me first and then I reply and she doesn’t respond 💔 Like I’m just an ego boost huh

I was with my guy friend today who I have a crush on after we had watched the Obsession movie. He asked if I wanted to go on a walk to this lake, and I hesitated because I was really tired and it was late and I kinda wanted to go home. Then he made a weird joke that I don’t understand. This is how our conversation went:

He said “Cmon, we can sit on the bench that overlooks the lake with the city lights”

I said “Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh”

He said jokingly “And then we can makeout”

I said “Huh?”

He said “Well, cause is that why you don’t want to do it? Cause it sounds too romantic?”

I said “No, I’m just tired and have to wake up early tomorrow” Which was true, I have to wake up at like 6:30 AM for my job.

But why would he assume I was rejecting him in a romantic way? And is this an indication that he thinks about me in a romantic way?

you know that scene in gilmore girls in the car with rory and jess? where they stare at each other a second too long? what do you call this phenomenon, and what can it indicate?

Is this a real phenomenon? Super good looking men dating fat women?

I’m in love with my male friend. I don’t know what to do. We met through a mutual friend and ended up in the same class together. He approached me after class and we clicked immediately.

We only hang out one on one because he prefers that in general. He likes to be physically close to me but again, I don’t think it’s personal.

We do make prolonged eye contact sometimes to the point of me going “okay, yeah, he likes you”.

One time I tried hand feeding him part of food he shared with me just to see what would happen and he immediately let me and told me he liked it. He also gave me his hoodie for the summer but I asked for it. Also he wants me to meet his mom and he’s traveling to visit me over the summer.

I just can’t tell if it’s personal or not. I know he is picky about who he approaches or interacts with. But he also told me that I don’t make him excited (ouch!) and that I instead make him feel very calm and at ease because he feels like he can be himself. I know that’s a good thing but the lack of excitement makes me think he doesn’t like me back.

i’m so mad i have this stupidass dopamine deficiency that leads to me pursue people ONLY WHEN THEY DONT WANT ME. it literally ONLY HAPPENS WHEN THEY DONT RECIPROCATE. when they reciprocate i lose interest immediately. but the feeling of trying to win someone over or prove myself to someone gives me such a strong feeling of dopamine and purpose. i think im just baseline depressed all the time and i use people to fill a void and it makes me act like an idiot to people who just want to offer me healthy love.

something i got socially ostracized for as a child was caring too much, like sending too many texts and asking too many questions or spiraling about issues that i cared about more than others.

now whenever i double text someone or show i care too much my brain expects me to be left behind or treated like a burden. im constantly afraid my feelings and needs are “too much” for the people around me.

what im trying to learn and accept is that giving out love should never feel like a waste because the point of life is to love and grieve. if my love isn’t returned, it should be redirected, not punished. that being said, ive also learned that people NEED SPACE AND ITS NOT PERSONAL!!!

i’m super passionate about criminal justice and service for the poor and i’m naturally good at the skills required for reading comprehension and logical reasoning. i’ve been doing the LSAT and if i pay attention to the subject i can easily identify the premise, type of question, etc.

but that’s the problem. with inattentive ADHD i find it quite difficult to stay on-task. the passages assigned are purposefully draining to read. i’m worried i’m just too spacey and my ability to pay selective attention is too impaired.

does anyone know tricks or tips for improving selective attention in regards to the LSAT or in general? i really want to be a public defender.

also, please don’t take the fact that i’m typing oin all lowercase as a reason for me not to be a lawyer.

i am a college student home for the summer and my days have become super unstructured. i have audhd and i NEED structure or else i become depressed and unmotivated and engage in harmful behaviors.

i really like spending 30-40 minutes doing cardio each day. it genuinely changes my mood and gives me a will to live. but besides that, i don’t spend enough time outside. i’m an unemployed chud.

i’m looking for some kind of third space where i can be outdoors. specifically, some kind of manual labor to keep me busy and snap me out of my depression. does anyone have any ideas?

i need help. yesterday i went to the doctors and basically told her i was chemically depressed because of my continued substance abuse of weed and nicotine. i smoke all day everyday ALONG with taking a heavy dose of SSRI’s and adhd medication. this has been going on for almost 5 years, but ive had a dopamine seeking tendency for as long as i can remember.

but my doctor just asked if i had a nutritionist. she was more concerned with my weight and my binge eating because i also use food for dopamine. i’m overweight and i REALLY DONT WANT TO BE BUT EATING IS LIKE MY HYPERFIXATION 😭 and if i don’t use food as my vice, i use substances. and when i abuse substances, i get extremely depressed. but when i use food for
dopamine, i gain weight, which apparently, according to everyone in my life, is more detrimental.

i felt invisible at the doctors appointment. I NEED HELP! I AM ASKING YOU FOR HELP! I AM DEPRESSED AND NOT DOING WELL! WHY ARE YOU ASKING HOW I FEEL ABOUT MY BODY WHEN I JUST TOLD YOU IM A FUNCTIONING ADDICT?