u/Adorable_Click_7071

I’m not sure if this was already common knowledge, but I found it interesting.

As a therapist, I really enjoy watching the Kardashians and observing their behavioural patterns etc.

Kim obviously thinks she’s some sort of God, she has always thought she’s better and more capable than everyone else - including her sisters. Kim has this “addiction” to working but she isn’t really addicted to working - she’s addicted to appearing busier, better, and more successful than everyone else.

It’s just really fascinating because Kim thinks she’s so self aware and she actually has no emotional intelligence. The episode where her and Kourtney did the Skims x Dolce campaign for example, Kim was still diminishing what Kourtney was originally upset about with that whole Kim x Dolce saga - “ we were arguing about what we were wearing , that’s so middle school of us “

But that’s not what it was about. At all. And Kourtney explained plenty of times why she was so upset, and her feelings IMO were 100% valid. Kim ALWAYS needs to be center of attention, she always has to look like some martyr and she has a crazy God complex. I’d love to do a deep dive on her and properly psychoanalyse these behaviours and patterns.

Wills last post was 29.08 - what’s going on?

Levi also hasn’t posted in weeks with the exception of a brand post.

👀 theories ?

I broke up with my boyfriend of four years on 20th July. That is the last day we spoke to each other.

I have good and bad days but recently I keep having vivid dreams about him and wake up feeling distraught, I then find myself really struggling with not being able to stop thinking of him for the entire day.

I swing between complete disgust and anger at how he treated me and then feeling sad, missing him, and wondering if he misses me.

One things for sure, I am never contacting him again. I’d rather suffer everyday than to ever reach out to him and allow him to see me in a state of vulnerability ever again.

I feel quite pathetic. I’m too old for this. But it’s my first heartbreak and I’m struggling.

As mentioned there are days when I feel nothing but disgust and anger towards him, and someone on my previous post mentioned this is just part of my healing journey but how long is it going to be until he stops occupying so much of my thoughts.

On the days where I feel confident in my decision to end things, I actually find myself feeling guilty for how happy I am to be away from him. Is this normal? I do also miss him but I recognise that he was not good for me and treated me horribly and I’d rather miss him everyday for the rest of my life than to ever go back to him.

Hey all,

I posted here a week ago: https://www.reddit.com/r/CatsUK/s/I6oM2JPgvX

I firstly wanted to thank everyone for the incredibly kind comments, all the advice, and the support.

My mum took our cat to the vet yesterday for an ultrasound, he’s such a placid and good natured boy no sedation was needed. The ultrasound was my idea.

My mum contacted me today to give me the devastating news that our cat has GI lymphoma and only has a few weeks (maybe a couple of months) to live. Maybe a little bit more if he responds well to steroid treatment.

I’m utterly heartbroken, I’m completely devastated. We have taken such good care of him, he goes to the vet every month, how was this not picked up sooner? If it was, maybe we could have done something and been able to treat and cure him. It absolutely breaks me to think he’s been in pain for some considerable time and I haven’t known.

I honestly can’t imagine not having my little Patch around in a couple of months. He seemed so healthy literally up until a few months ago, and even with how he’s been, I never would have imagined something like lymphoma. Although he’s had arthritis and a bit of illness, he’s still been his normal self - curious, cheeky, affectionate, and bossy!

I also moved out at the start of this year and I live about an hour away from home now, so I’ve spent less time with him than I usually would. I feel awful that I’ve missed out on this time with him, now that I know we might not have much more.

I don’t want to imagine a life without him. I don’t want him to not be here. This is the most heartbreaking and hardest thing that I’ve ever gone through.

I am Cancer Sun, Aquarius Rising and Aquarius is in my 12th House. My ex is an Aquarius Sun.

I learnt today that we may have experienced “12th House Synastry”

We split up 10 years ago but he’s never left my mind. The moment we met I kind of felt like “oh, I’ve met you before, I know you from somewhere and I know you’re going to become important to me”. However, I wouldn’t describe us as “soulmates”.

The connection felt difficult to explain: familiar, psychologically penetrating, private, dreamlike and almost as though he had access to a part of me that usually remains hidden. We haven’t spoken in years, but somehow he still lives inside of me.

I know that typically the 12th house is associated with dreams, the unconscious, longing, things that are difficult to grasp, and experiences that seem to exist somewhere between memory and reality. And that’s how I’d describe this.

Interested to hear people’s thoughts, opinions and experiences.

My cat turned 17 this June, he’s still his playful, cheeky, curious self but has started to develop what appear to be significant health problems.

1. he has early stage kidney failure. This was diagnosed around a year ago as very very early, and we adjusted his diet accordingly. However, it is slowly amping up. He’s naturally a small cat (runt of the litter) and at his heaviest weighed around 3.9/4kg. But with his kidney function deteriorating, he now weighs only 2.9kg, despite still having a large appetite. The vet says his weight is going to continue to decrease over time.

However, to try and help we’ve started B12 injections, upon vet recommendation.

2. his joints. Again, this has happened fairly suddenly (within last 6 months). He’s always been a very active cat, and when he was younger (I’d say up until 4 years ago) he spent a LOT of time outside in the garden and residential area, jumping over fences etc.

However, he now appears to have arthritis. We have started giving him Solensia for this upon vet recommendation. So far it seems to be helping a bit, he’s started jumping up onto the sofa again whereas he couldn’t do that a couple of months ago.

About a year ago I also bought him little cat stairs so that he can safely and comfortably climb up onto high surfaces (sofa and bed). So I’m really trying to take care of him.

3. I don’t know why but he has regularly started vomiting. He’s always had digestion issues, but he’s started being sick a lot. My mum said he was sick 3 times in one day last week. We don’t know what is causing this so he is booked for an ultrasound on Monday. He’s a very well behaved, placid cat so doesn’t need sedation.

I guess I’m just looking for opinions and other people’s experience with their senior cats. How can he have almost 17 perfectly healthy years and then all of a sudden develop these problems?

We’ve looked after him so well, he goes to the vet every month for his flea treatment, claw trimming, and to be weighed.

My mum and I used to joke about how he was still so “kitten like” and nobody that meets him believes he is 17. But he’s starting to age, experience poor health, and I’m worried and petrified.

I’ve had him since I was 18 and I can’t imagine a world without his little face. I just feel helpless because realistically I know all we can do is try to maintain his quality of life while we can, and the alternative is making me want to cry.

I’ve posted recently about breaking up with my boyfriend of 4 years around a month ago. Yes I was the one who initiated the breakup, but definitely not for lack of love or trying.

Yesterday was a really hard day. I went for lunch with my mum, which was lovely, as she knows I’ve been feeling down (not only about the breakup but also had 8 months of significant work related bullying which caused me to leave last week).

After lunch we went to seven dials food market and I kept thinking about my ex. They have lots of different food stalls and a photo booth. I couldn’t stop thinking of my ex, we’d always planned to go but didn’t get round to it.

I started feeling really upset and heavy, thinking of how many more memories and how much more time I’d wanted to have with him. It felt really weird. Like grief in a way.

I was walking around the food market thinking how it would have been if I was there with him, what would we eat, how happy I’d be just in his company. Our relationship was very difficult but he was my buddy, my friend. I genuinely enjoyed being around him.

I’m starting to think more about all the times I maybe also took for granted, just like I feel he did. Sometimes he’d come to meet me on a Monday morning so we could have a coffee, but I’d be annoyed, because he’d only ever stay for a few hours and then want to go home and spend time with his brother. I recognise that was wrong of me, and it came from a place of always feeling like I had to battle with his family for his time.. it was a reoccurrence.

I really wish things could have been different but I’m also at a point where I know they won’t be. For that to happen, both people have to want change and I don’t think he can. I think he’d rather lose me, and lose us, than to have to change anything about his lifestyle.

Just feeling really empty, exhausted, and sad.

I know you should not compare yourself on social media. But everyone else that I know seems to be able to do things.

They seem to have moved on from the time we were friends, or the time we knew each other, or from our relationship. I’m still stuck thinking about things that happened 10, even 15 years ago.

People seem to be able to be consistent in the gym, they have decent social circles, they have hobbies. I spend most of my time ruminating and thinking about what I want to do and should do, but very little time actually doing anything. I feel frozen in time, and I feel like life is literally passing me by.

I broke up with my bf of 4 years recently and I don’t know if that’s triggered me somewhat. I always feel fine for the first month after breaking up with someone but now it’s been over a month and reality is starting to set in that he’s probably happier without me and not thinking of me.

And that seems to be a common theme in my life. People that I was once very close too, sometimes for many years, moving on and forgetting about me. They miss other people but they don’t miss me. They don’t notice that I’m not there anymore and I feel forgotten.

I also feel like I’m outside my body watching my life but not participating in it. Even when I have conversations with people, I’m very aware of what I’m saying, I don’t feel like I can naturally talk to people anymore the way I used to. I’m always scared of saying the wrong thing or sounding stupid. I don’t know how to be myself anymore and I’m sure people can pick up on the fact that I don’t seem authentic but I used to be. I don’t know when I changed.

It’ll be October before I know it and October 30th would have been my anniversary. The winter is a very hard time because that’s when I was first with my ex, we have a lot of memories around the festive season. This will be the first year in 5 years that we won’t be together around Christmas or NY, and I just feel so sad and empty.

I feel like I’ve given a lot of myself to others and never really received it back. And the times I did, I was too young to realise what I had and I messed up. I have made a lot of mistakes that are hard to live with, and I can’t see myself carrying on for the next 40 years.

I hope this question is allowed.

I have savings but want to claim JSA whilst I job hunt. I know with UC you cannot claim if you have more than £16,000 in savings.

Is this also the case for JSA, or are the rules different? I saw that they were but thought that might be incorrect.

Any advice helpful. TY.

Signed yesterday and pretty sure they’ve already breached.

I included strict confidentiality clauses around the reasons for my departure, not sharing this information with anyone other than a need to know basis such as accounts, financials, board, line manager etc.

But I can see HR sent an email to someone with delegate inbox access outlining the reasons for my departure. That means some administration colleagues are now aware of why I left.

What will happen? Is my settlement now void?

Sorry if this has been commented previously I am new to the sub.

Why do Britney’s teeth look extremely different now to how they used to?

And why is her voice so much deeper than it used to be?

Are the changes due to medication, substance abuse, or something else?

I’ve been going to hot yoga pretty regularly since May. I am based in UK and I go to Hot Pod.

It’s generally been amazing, however there is a teacher who does all classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I’ve been to a few of his classes now and I don’t think I can go anymore - his style of teaching is awful.

First, the classes are extremely boring and repetitive. We repeat the same 5 postures basically the whole way through. He occasionally adds on another posture at the end of the sequence, today what he did was make us stand on one leg, lift the other, then grab it with our hands and pull out. I cannot do that.

Now that leads me to the next thing, he doesn’t offer any variations or modifications at all. So a lot of the time, there will be at least 2 or 3 postures I struggle with and he stands at the front of the class silently watching us. He can see I am struggling but says nothing. None of the other teachers are like this.

Lastly, he has an incredibly patronising and condescending tone. His classes are simply not enjoyable, and I find myself getting frustrated.

He will deliver an instruction, then stand there and say nothing for a few mins. Then he will add to the sequence and all of a sudden the pace is incredibly fast and it’s difficult to keep my form and also move along the sequence.

Today I came home with back pain from his class.

The reason I’m moaning is because it’s cutting out a lot of possible classes for me - he does all 4 Tuesday classes and all 4 Thursday classes.

My question is, should I mention it to the studio owner? She also teaches and I’m going to her class tomorrow. How do I frame it so that it sounds constructive?

Last spoke to my ex on 20th July. It was left open ended, on his end.

He’s since gone on holiday to Cyprus (I knew he was going) and will be there until October (this is a yearly holiday).

I won’t pretend I’m not a bit hurt that he did not reach out to me prior to going away particularly as he will be away for some time. I broke up with him, but not because I didn’t love him etc. because he was not committed to me as I felt he should’ve been after 4 years together.

He loves Harry Potter and I saw this Christmas Hogwarts event for December that he would have loved. It upset me so much. Why could he not just meet me half way and why could he not have tried harder.

I keep replaying our relationship in my head and my main thoughts are feeling guilty for the times when I was mean or distant, or when I caused stress without any real need. Although everything I did was driven by feeling unloved and not a priority to him, I still recognise there were times when I handled that the wrong way.

I’m also feeling really sad for how it ended. I had so much hope and belief that we would work and we haven’t and it just hurts me so much because I loved him more than anything in the world and I haven’t always shown that and despite the love I had for him I never felt like he loved me the same way.

I keep thinking about everything and I feel really down and upset. I doubt he’s thinking of me at all. He would have contacted me if he wanted to speak to me.. he’s not the type of person to just ghost.

I’ve said some really awful things to him and so has he. I didn’t mean them, but it’s one of those situations where once you’ve said it you can’t take it back. Stuff like I don’t love him anymore, I’m not attracted to him etc. which isn’t even true. I don’t know why I did that.

It’s really hard knowing that I also contributed to the breakup even though it was because of how low and hurt by him I was feeling.

I know breaking up was the right decision but I’m really struggling with missing him and wondering if he even cares about me.

This is just a post to say to anyone being mistreated at work.. to anyone being bullied, discriminated against, set up to fail, pushed out, excluded.

Stand up for yourself. Don’t let them do it.

I spent 6 months fighting for myself - I did everything the way I was supposed to, I followed processes, procedures, I abided by employment law, I remained willing to work and seek a resolution despite management making my life absolute hell. To the point where I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease caused by severe stress, to the point where I couldn’t function anymore because my mental health had deteriorated so significantly.

And to all the people that commented on my previous posts saying, you’ll never get what you want, you don’t have any rights etc. you were wrong.

I advocated for myself, hired a fantastic solicitor, didn’t back down and didn’t allow work to pressure me into agreeing a figure I knew wasn’t fair.

I got what I wanted and then some. And I’m so so so happy I can leave this chapter in the past.

I’m off to take some well deserved rest, recover and get back to feeling happy and healthy.

God bless.

Edit: “children are noisy and you just have to accept it” save it and put a sock in it. I don’t have to accept excessive, disruptive noise. That is different from ordinary day to day living noise. I am not going to accept being woken up at 5am everyday and having to deal with banging, jumping, and heavy impact noise from morning until night.

Have lived in my 2nd floor flat for a year with zero issues- no noise from any neighbours.

Last week some new tenants moved into the flat upstairs directly above me. For context I own my flat I am not a tenant.

Everyday since they’ve moved in I’ve been woken up at 5am by their child running and jumping up and down on the floor. It goes on for hours. It’s 9:20am now and still going on.

The child also screams loudly. I never hear the parents.

I know that children can be noisy but this feels excessive. It happens all day, not just in the morning, and it’s driving me insane.

I don’t want to cause any problems for myself. What’s the best way to deal with this?

My solicitor has been absolutely amazing at supporting me through this process I want to add.

My employer has failed in many areas and, if settlement cannot be reached / agreed upon, I will pursue action via ACAS / ET. My claims include failure to make reasonable adjustments, disability discrimination, breach of contract, and whistleblowing.

Negotiations have been ongoing for a few weeks now. My employer was the one that approached me regarding a settlement exit. This was at the same time as when they said they would refuse to investigate my grievance appeal and that if I do not accept a settlement exit they will make me redundant. I have worked there for four years with an exemplary record, zero issues.. my manager just decided he didn’t like me one day.

I’m trying to get in touch with my solicitor but can’t get through and feeling anxious as she emailed me saying she’d received a call from HR in regard to our counteroffer. She didn’t note the contents of the call.

Usually, HR communicate with my solicitor via email so the call has thrown me off. Does it mean anything or am I just reading into it?

Their initial offer was garbage but they’ve (almost) doubled it since negotiations started. That tells me they’re aware of their serious failures, or at least don’t want to risk a tribunal.

I was feeling fine and now since the dream I can’t stop thinking about him, not even in the way of wanting to get back together but just feeling so sad and down. Has this happened to anyone else?

I broke up with my ex in July. We were together for almost four years and the break up was a long time coming. For context we’re both in our 30’s.

The relationship was very volatile, mostly distressing and stressful, but of course with any complicated relationship there were genuine, loving moments.

We have “broken up” before, but I knew it wasn’t really over. This time it is. I have no desire to go back, I don’t feel the same way about him anymore and I don’t want the future with him that I once did.

We last spoke on 20th July, when he left the conversation slightly open ended by saying he’d written me a letter and wanted to send it to me in “due time”. I responded with “okay” and went about my day. I haven’t reached out since and nor has he. Maybe he’s changed his mind about sending the letter, I don’t know and I don’t care, because it won’t change anything.

Personally I think he said it to try and keep things from fully ending, I don’t really believe there is a letter. But whatever, I digress. A few days ago I had the most vivid, detailed dream about him that completely derailed me.

The dream felt so real and I woke up hysterical. In the dream he’d sent me a long message, and told me he wanted to get married to me in 2028. Other stuff about how much he loves and misses me but that our relationship felt destructive. He called me the love of his life.

I responded to this message in the dream wanting to meet him, we agreed to meet. I said I was on my way, then he wrote back saying he can’t see me anymore he’s gone out with his friends. I said this is another example of you not putting me first, this is why we broke up etc.

I started crying in the dream and saying why can’t you just do what you say you’ll do. I asked him when I would see him and he said “so soon” then I woke up.

I’ve felt off balance and sad since. How dare he invade my dreams! I don’t want him back, I don’t even miss him in real life but I did in the dream. I don’t know if it means anything but it’s just left me feeling off kilter.

I feel a bit dumb getting so upset over a dream. 😢

It’s so hard to choose but I’ve narrowed it down to three separate sets of lyrics:

“A conman sells a fool a get love quick scheme” - loml

“I would’ve died for your sins / instead I just died inside / and you deserve prison but you won’t get time” - The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

“She would’ve made such a lovely bride / what a shame she’s f**ked in the head, they said / but you’ll find the real thing instead / she’ll patch up your tapestry that I shred” - champagne problems

There are so many more but wow, each of these songs breaks my heart whenever I listen. Heart wrenching.